[$] Not Myself [Avengers rp] (MDaylus)

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

(should I time skip soon)

Loki nodded when Sleepnir said that it had been a long day for everyone. "Thank you for inviting me to run with you. I much enjoyed it." Loki thanked. Walking into the house he breathed in the scent of what is his family in the house. It made him smile and think of the place as home. "Come I'll show you where you will be staying this evening." Loki beckoned moving towards a hallway.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

((Yeah, probably.))

Sleepnir walked close to Loki’s side as they entered the mansion. Letting the god guide him to his room, Sleepnir stood in the door for a moment, surprised. The room was spacious, if slightly minimalist. There was a large bed, but efforts had been made to let him be comfortable in his horse form if he wanted. “This…this is impressive.” He said slowly. “I wasn’t expecting a set up like this.” He said slowly.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

(and so I shall after your next post)

Loki led his son to the room that Tony had prepared for his children and smiled gently as Sleepnir stopped in the doorway. He let his son survey the room for a moment and take it in. "Tony want to make sure you were comfortable in whatever form you chose. He has done the same for your siblings with the exception of Jormungandr's. It is hard to accommodate his large form." Loki explained. "I shall leave you to you sleep now my son and see you in the morning. I love you and goodnight." Loki bid before leaving the room and heading to his own. He sent a message over the bond to tell Tony that he was heading to bed and he should not rush to join him.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Sleepnir smiled slightly at Loki’s words. “Thank you.” He murmured. Turning to watch Loki as he left, Sleepnir dipped his head slightly. “Goodnight mother.” He replied, watching the man disappear down the hall before he stepped into his room and closed the door. Tony responded to Loki, informing him he was in the lab and would come to bed soon. Of course soon took longer than the term usually meant for most, and by the time Tony got to bed, Loki was asleep and he just slipped into bed and cuddled close.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

(Time Skip)

Three weeks passed after the Thanksgiving day and while Thanksgiving had been fun the three weeks since had been hard. It seemed like Loki's morning sickness had come back to bite him in the a** for even thinking it might have been done. Every night and almost every afternoon it afflicted him. It was hard to hide it at times but so far he had managed. However because of such things he had been getting less sleep. Then on top of all that Thanos had made any other sleeping moment his own plaything. Dragging Loki into nightmare after nightmare, so much so that Loki had clamped down mostly on the bond between him and Tony to allow the man to sleep and not be affected. The only good thing that came of Thanos' bombardment was that if Tony caught him being sick at night he could blame it on the elder god and a particularly bad nightmare. It was what he told Bruce as well not wanting to give anything away to the scientist that would cause him to inform Tony. If it wasn't a pregnancy inflicted thing then Bruce could say anything Loki reasoned when he lied.

While he may get away with it with Tony and Bruce Natasha was not decieved even if she was not supposed to know that the god was pregnant. After Thanksgiving she had sat Clint down and explained what was going on with Loki and made him swear not to say anything, under penalty of many things of course. So far the archer had said nothing but she had seen the concern she shared when they noticed Loki losing a bit of weight. Natasha knew she could not let Loki go on like this, she needed to get him to tell Tony. If she had to play hard ball to do it then so be it. It was just shy of a week before Christmas when she cornered Loki in the kitchen extremely early one morning.

The god was obviously avoiding sleep though he looked like he needed it desperately. She was sure he was avoiding food too not wanting to get caught with another bout of morning sickness. She laid down her ultimatum to him. He had till the end of the day to tell Tony about the pregnancy or she would. She of course saw the fear in those green eyes but she didn't back down. Loki could be mad at her but this was for the best. With those thoughts she left to do some training until Bruce and Steve awoke to tell them of what she had done.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Though Tony tried not to let it show too much, he noticed how quickly Loki seemed to be taking a turn for the worse, and the worse Loki got, the worse Tony’s anxiety. He turned his attention from his numerous and random projects back to the magic scanner and blocker, tinkering with it now that he had a better grasp of his own magic, and he took to sneaking books from Loki and trying to figure out not only what they meant, but how they could be bent to his unique brand of magic. He did anything and everything he could think of to try and protect Loki, but there was so little he could do to help their immediate problem.

It didn’t help that Loki was shielding his mind from Tony, blocking the bond. Tony hated knowing that Loki was keeping him from knowing when he needed help, and he hated being left alone with his own thoughts again. He’d gotten so used to having another mind attached to his, the constant feeling of company, it was pleasant. And no matter if Loki did it knowingly or not, that connection had helped him sort through and handle his own thoughts. When his mind began to be too chaotic, to overflow, and when Tony began to lose control, it had always felt like Loki’s mind had pressed close and Tony was able to stop and get things back on track. Now Tony was stuck all alone in his head again.

Tony ended up coming down stairs shortly after Natasha had confronted Loki. Even though Loki tried to let him sleep, Tony had problems staying asleep without his mate close-by, but he never complained. “Hey Lo….” He said gently from the door, slowly coming up to the god and rubbing his back. “Couldn’t sleep again?” he asked softly. “Hey….why don’t you come back to bed? You ease up on the bond a bit and maybe I can try shielding your mind for an hour or two so you can rest. I saw something about it in one of your books. Maybe….maybe I can….well it might be worth a shot.”
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki sat on the couch after Natasha had left him, his mind was reeling. How had the woman figured it out and for how long had she known. Why had she held it back now only to threaten him today and make sure he had to tell Tony today or she would. Fear and anxiety felt like it was closing in from all sides on him now. For weeks the anxiety had been building and building with everything and the more he noticed Tony's anxiety the more anxious Loki got. It was like Tony's concern would lead him him to find out. Or if he let Thanos through to Tony then he would tell the man, the elder god had already threatened it when he had found the slight drain on Loki's magic.

He had been so concerned and cautious the last couple weeks that he had barely noticed anything about the Avengers that wasn't obvious. He was so lost in his thoughts after Natasha left trying to figure out what he would do that he didn't hear Tony enter the room. He jumped when the man called to him, he relaxed when the man moved forward and rubbed his back. The man's hands on him calmed him and seem to quell the drain on his magic a bit, like the child decided it was more fun to take some from it's father. "No." he admitted when Tony asked if he couldn't sleep again. Green eyes looked up skeptically when the man suggested he go back to bed, back to the nightmares and even ease up on the bond. He was more surprised when Tony suggested that he could try to shield his mind from Thanos, something he had seen in one of Loki's books.

Worth a shot... Loki wanted to believe it too. He was so tired and he had been for weeks. Sleep sounded like a wonderful prospect and Yggdrasil he wanted to take that option. To just lay down for a bit and sleep forgetting all his worries. Loki looked up to Tony seriously considering the prospect of trying it, what would it hurt he already had to tell Tony by the end of the day anyway or Natasha would. Slowly he nodded his concent, sleep he wanted to sleep. "You are sure?" he questioned.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony continued to rub Loki’s back and shoulders, trying whatever he could to comfort him. He met the skeptical gaze calmly, knew how hard it was for Loki right now. Even if he didn’t know what it was like to have some evil presence controlling your dreams, he knew what it was like to have your dreams constantly plagued, to have your minds never at ease.

Hearing the question, he shook his head slightly. “Am I sure it will work? No. Do I want to try it? Yes…..so long as you do.” He replied. “We both know that my magic doesn’t work like yours…..but I think I might be able to do this, for a little while at least. If it works, as soon as I feel like I’m starting to strain myself, I’ll wake you up so you don’t have to risk Thanos slipping in.” he continued. Sighing, he cupped Loki’s cheek gently, thumb rubbing over his cheekbone slightly. “I want to try and help you. I need to.” He murmured, kissing him softly. “we have to figure out how to help you.”

Without warning, he shifted and lifted Loki up off the couch, carrying him back upstairs. Reaching their room, he put Loki on the bed, closing and locking the door, shading the window and dimming the lights, Even putting on soft acoustic guitar music, one of the happy mediums that they’d found as Tony tried to begin introducing Loki to music. Returning to bed, he settled, sitting up against the headboard and pulling Loki close to him. “Just ease up on the bond Lo….let me get my magic through…..” he murmured to him, fingers massaging at the tension in the god’s back and shoulders.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki relaxed more into Tony's touch as the man already feeling his eyes become heavy and wanting to close but he forced himself to stay awake with a slight shake of his head. When Tony explained that he didn't know if it would work but that he was sure that he wanted to try. Loki nodded at that, he was willing to try even if they did not succeed after all there was a small chance that Thanos' attention would be elsewhere for just a bit and he might catch some sleep. It was nice to know that Tony would wake him if anything started to happen including the man himself straining. Leaning into the hand on his cheek he felt his eyes close for a moment and probably longer than was normal for one trying to stay awake. "I accept your help, what you can offer and thank you." Loki murmured tiredly.

He didn't even react past slipping his arms around Tony when the man picked him up. He was too tired to be surprised, quite ready to fall asleep in his mate's arms. Even more so when he was set on the bed and the room was darkened, along with music being added. Loki didn't even realize that he had started to fall asleep when Tony joined him in bed. Green eyes opened barely when Tony spoke telling him to let up on the bond. Loki gave a slight nod and slowly eased his tight hold on the bond. It felt nice to have it open, to feel Tony in his mind once more even if it was not fully open. Green eyes closed once more after that and with the fingers massaging the tension out of him.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony smiled softly at the sight of Loki already dozing off. Feeling Loki ease up on the bond, it took all of Tony’s strength not to rush into Loki’s mind, eager to have that closeness again. Slowly slipping into his mind a little, Tony relaxed. ‘Hello there.’ He whispered over the bond. Concentrating, he reached inward for his magic and pulled at it, stretching and manipulating it until it covered Loki’s mind, holding firm. Tony noticed a slight drain on his magic, but could only imagine that it was Loki’s exhaustion pulling on any energy he could. ‘Alright Lo….sleep.’ he whispered into his mind.

Tony kept Loki close to him, just holding him as he concentrated, eyes closed and breath steady, almost like he was meditating. Normally this would be torture for Tony, but if this really did help, he’d do anything, no matter how uncharacteristic or draining
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki didn't respond to Tony's hello in his mind with words but merely the emotion of happiness and contentedness. The magic he felt working around his mind wasn't new but the way it was manipulated was strange to him especially with Tony working it. If he had had more of a presence of mind he might have analyzed it. When Tony whispered across the bond for Loki to sleep the god let go of his tenuous hold on consciousness. He slipped into sleep almost instantly and his body went limp against Tony's.

His sleep was quiet and peaceful with Tony next to him. The child within him calm and quiet. While it wasn't necessarily active yet, it was taking less of a drain on his magic at this point. That helped Loki sleep knowing he didn't have to keep such a eye on his magic at the moment. He slept soundly for a few hours and would have slept more had his body not grown used to the little amounts of sleep he had been allowed. Even still when he woke he felt a bit more rested and not like he was going to fall asleep any moment. He gave a soft questioning hum as he opened his eyes not sure what time it was.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony guarded Loki’s mind the whole time he slept. He could feel something else, something he could only imagine was Thanos, poking around, testing the edges of his magic, finding weak spots. Tony was a little uneasy, sure that If Thanos wanted to press, he wouldn’t be able to fight the alien off for too long, but Thanos didn’t seem to be overly interested in bothering him. This time at least. Thankfully that left Loki to have a solid few hours of rest. More than he’d had in days. And even if Loki needed more, Tony was satisfied by what Loki had managed.

Feeling Loki slowly wake up, Tony waited for the god’s eyes to open before he pulled his magic away. Tony was heading towards the limits of his control anyway, only a little magic left, and when he’d finally completely pulled from Loki’s mind again, a sharp headache hit him. “Well that worked rather well.” He said lightly as he rubbed his forehead.

Looking over to Loki, Tony slipped away slightly as he stretched and worked stiff muscles. “I know you need some more sleep, but we’ll have to wait a bit before I can do that for you again.” He said regretfully, slowly cupping Loki’s cheek. “But you are already looking a little better.” He added, smiling as he saw a little more energy in Loki’s eyes, some of the redness having disappeared. "Now we just need to get you downstairs and get some food in you."
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki sucked in a breath as he felt Tony pull his shield from his mind. He could sense the little bits of magic the man had left and felt guilty for putting such a strain on the man. He couldn't allow such things to happen, and he certainly didn't like feeling and seeing the bits of pain it caused Tony. With a sigh the god closed the bond again almost hesitating now that he had opened it and felt what it offered once more after having it closed for a few weeks. "It did, thank you." Loki thanked with a small smile. "Do not push yourself for my sake I will figure something out, I asked my mother to look into it also. She may have something for me the next time we speak." Loki stated shaking his head.

When the man commented on how he was already looking better the god nodded. He felt more rested and like he could do some things but nothing too much. At the mention of food however Loki paused evaluating whether or not his stomach would handle it. It seemed to be hit or miss lately mostly a misses and he doubted he would be able to hide it easily right now if it was a miss. "Perhaps something small and some juice..." Loki suggested. Liquids always seemed to be a safe bet especially if they were cold.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

“Well until we find something else, I can do that for you….it’s really not that hard on me.” Tony replied. “I want to take care of you…..you’d do the same for me.” He added, petting his hair gently. He knew Loki didn’t like Tony hurting or being tired because of him, but Loki needed him and Tony could deal with a headache every now and then if it kept Loki safe and healthy.

Hearing Loki agree to some food, Tony smiled. Leaning in and giving him a soft kiss, he slowly stood, holding out a hand to help Loki up, not letting go as they moved. “I think we can manage that. Maybe a sandwich and berries? I think Steve went to the store a day or two ago so we should have that.” He said slowly. Frowning to himself as he finally noticed that Loki had blocked him out again, Tony looked away, making a face. He understood Loki blocking him out at night or something. But Loki shouldn’t be blocking him out otherwise, especially now that he’d gotten a decent nap. Was there something else Tony needed to worry about? Was there more to Loki’s moods than just Thanos in his dreams?

 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

"You can not do it all night or even every night I can sense that much." Loki argued with a frown. It was true that he would take care of Tony if there was something wrong with the man. "Nevermind I planned on doing more research for it today." Loki sighed pulling away and sitting up.

Taking the hand offered to him loki stood from the bed. Listening to tony mention the food options he kept from blanching at the mention of a sandwich, the berries however had peaked his interest. "Berries, fruit sounds like a good idea, maybe a sad instead of a sanwich." Loki suggested. His stomach hadn't liked anything heated lately or highly processed.