I... Don't know what to do.
There's a person I've been friends with for years. And lately, she's going through so much s**t with her girlfriend (yes she's bisexual, deal with it) and I know she wants to break up with her girlfriend but... It seems like the whole world is against her. And, lately, I've just been feeling... Well, something I've never felt before. An ugly little emotion called jealousy. It could just be me being an attention whore but...
Well, I think I'm feeling something beyond friendship for her. I'm crying while typing this, you know? Yeah, sad, I know.
It's sad to feel this way for someone online, and yet... I can't help it. It's something I haven't felt since... Well, since high school. I'm always waiting for her to get online, I'm always eager to talk to her and... Well, I miss her terribly when she goes away, especially when it's her internet cutting out without warning. I willingly pay an extra thirty dollars per month so I can talk with her more. This isn't something just a normal friend would do, is it? If it is I guess I'm just a weird friend...
But... I love her.
I'm not saying this to her face right now as that'd be awkward and stupid. Especially since she's in a relationship right now, even if it is rocky. Actually, especially since it's rocky. I don't want her to go and do something stupid because of my feelings and... Well, I might be looking too much into it but it almost seems like she wants to start things up with her ex. But...
Dammit. It's hard to keep supporting her and keep everything locked up, but I'm doing it for her sake... At least, I think I am. I don't know anymore, I just want he to be happy however possible... Even if I'm not in the picture.
It's bizarre, it's painful, it's... The corniest thing I've ever experienced, and yet it's true. It's agonizing every day that I can't be near here because of a distance of several hundred miles and the border of two countries. I want to die to end it because I can't be with her to comfort her when she's in need for a shoulder to cry on. I... Don't want to see her sad anymore. I've seen it too many times to take it much more...
How long do I have to keep everything locked inside?
There's a person I've been friends with for years. And lately, she's going through so much s**t with her girlfriend (yes she's bisexual, deal with it) and I know she wants to break up with her girlfriend but... It seems like the whole world is against her. And, lately, I've just been feeling... Well, something I've never felt before. An ugly little emotion called jealousy. It could just be me being an attention whore but...
Well, I think I'm feeling something beyond friendship for her. I'm crying while typing this, you know? Yeah, sad, I know.
It's sad to feel this way for someone online, and yet... I can't help it. It's something I haven't felt since... Well, since high school. I'm always waiting for her to get online, I'm always eager to talk to her and... Well, I miss her terribly when she goes away, especially when it's her internet cutting out without warning. I willingly pay an extra thirty dollars per month so I can talk with her more. This isn't something just a normal friend would do, is it? If it is I guess I'm just a weird friend...
But... I love her.
I'm not saying this to her face right now as that'd be awkward and stupid. Especially since she's in a relationship right now, even if it is rocky. Actually, especially since it's rocky. I don't want her to go and do something stupid because of my feelings and... Well, I might be looking too much into it but it almost seems like she wants to start things up with her ex. But...
Dammit. It's hard to keep supporting her and keep everything locked up, but I'm doing it for her sake... At least, I think I am. I don't know anymore, I just want he to be happy however possible... Even if I'm not in the picture.
It's bizarre, it's painful, it's... The corniest thing I've ever experienced, and yet it's true. It's agonizing every day that I can't be near here because of a distance of several hundred miles and the border of two countries. I want to die to end it because I can't be with her to comfort her when she's in need for a shoulder to cry on. I... Don't want to see her sad anymore. I've seen it too many times to take it much more...
How long do I have to keep everything locked inside?
