• That feeling.....that terrible feeling.
    like,i'm letting him down.
    like no matter how hard i try,
    if i don't make it through just this one day...
    ...he could die.

    My patient,my son.....his life was in my hands and no other ones.

    i tryed,i tryed!,but no matter
    what i did.no matter how long i worked.
    he still hurt,he still starved.

    every single last day.
    every hour.
    i thought,if he died.
    it was all my fault.

    my shift ended when i received a phone call.


    "are you ok?"

    "i..i'm sorry i tryed to wait to the end of your shift but i...."

    "are you ok?!......hello!?"

    When i finaly reached him,he seemed dead.
    face down,pale as a ghost.
    he looked like he was struggling.
    struggling to hold back his pain,just till the end of my shift.

    i wanted to die,i wanted his pain,i wanted his life for mine!
    but it didn't happen.i didn't die...
    but i passed out.

    an ambulence arrived,and we were both carried away.
    still conscience,i refused to talk to the doctors.
    it was there fault to he was dead...
    they wouldn't listen to me!

    then i waited right by his side,knowing there was still nothing i could do to save him.
    praying that his life wouldn't end....