• CHAPTER 171 - IT'S THE PAIN THAT I IGNORE

    The pain is there, and it always has been. You've just been too infatuated to realize the suffering it's caused you.

    .:{{Kai's Perspective}}:.

    Sleep was not an option for me that night. After I had spent an hour or two by myself in the living room, I ventured into the bedroom and crawled into the bed next to Arisa. Nighttime was nigh and there wasn't a cloud in the sky and the moon represented a lamp in the bedroom. I wrapped one arm under Arisa's shoulders and pulled her close to me inch-by-inch. In her slumber, she rolled into her side to cuddle next to me and wrap one arm around my torso. I flinched slightly and lightly gripped her hand with my free hand. We continued to lie in that position for the rest of the night and I never once shut my eyes.

    ~*~*~*~*~*~

    When the dawn's rays started to seep into the house, I sighed and glanced out the window. There was a thick blanket of fog that consumed the mountain and condensated on the windows. I had been lying on my back for hours on end, witnessing the outside world to develop from night into day. It was a lengthy time but nothing I hadn't done before.

    I'd have finally shut my eyes to gather some sleep but the pain was gradually increasing. As I was becoming a little more aware of my surroundings, Arisa's scent increased. I glanced down at her and she possessed the same peaceful, relaxed complexion in her slumber as she had when she went to bed. I glanced over at her arm and there were excessive goosebumps all over her pale skin; I had been lying shirtless which surely wouldn't aid her in any way. Lifting her hand, I kissed the back of it but stopped short. I nearly winced audibly once the taste of her flesh was upon my lips; I was even more sensitive to her scent that morning than I was the night before.

    Just before the pain became too much, I quickly climbed off of the bed and exited the bedroom. I exhaled my breath and gasped continuously. The pain had never been so incredibly intense before; why was it suddenly so painful? I seated myself on the couch in the living room and laced my fingers through my hair, resting my elbows on my knees. I breathed deeply and evenly, allowing a few groans of pain to slip through my teeth.

    "Dammit..." I hissed. "Goddammit, it hurts..."

    I was incredibly tempted to tear my corroded throat out; it was burning almost as badly as when I had first become a Vampire. Nothing was coming to mind as to why the pain was so intense. I knew the contract wasn't trying to take over--because I hadn't lost my sanity--but perhaps it was attempting to make me suffer even more. Those damn greedy bastards...

    Eventually, I was completely doubled-over on the couch with my hands still placed in my hair. I had been occupying myself in that position for a mere hour and a half before the pain was beginning to die down. Just in time, too; I could hear Arisa start to vomit in the bathroom. I took a breath and teleported into the bathroom to see her hunched over the toilet and hack again.

    "Arisa?" I asked quietly, cautious not to inhale too much of her scent.

    She groaned and vomited again, wrapping one of her feeble arms around her stomach, "Go away," she moaned.

    "Are you sick?" I lowered onto my knees near her but never touched her.

    Arisa wiped the sweat off of her forehead and flushed the toilet and glanced over at me, "I feel better now,"

    "You need rice," I advised. "And soup."

    She groaned and wrapped both of her arms around her stomach and laid herself on the bathroom floor. She pressed her flushed cheek against the tile and sighed in exasperation. She closed her eyes, "I think I caught a bug, just not as severe,"

    "When you're ready to consume something, notify me," I seated myself next to her and very cautiously touched her shoulder; so far so good.

    "Why are you being so cautious?" she asked weakly, looking over at me from the corner of her eye.

    I donned a weak smile, "It's nothing,"

    After a short moment, Arisa sat herself up and then stood up on her own two feet. I stood up to support her in case she would tumble but she walked straight into the kitchen after brushing her teeth. I immediately got to work on her food as she seated herself at the breakfast bar, crossing her arms and resting her chin on her arms. She sighed and I held my breath once more; I was attempting to limit my breathing for the time being.

    "I'm already ruining our vacation," she scoffed. "Sucks."

    "You're not ruining it," I looked over at her. "We still have a week left."

    "Hurry up; I'm starving." she huffed, averting the subject.

    As I was waiting for the food to cook, I reached my hand over and pressed it agianst Arisa's forehead. She possessed a slight fever and her cheeks were flushed. I reached over the counter and gripped onto her right arm lightly, the arm I had cut into with my own talons just a week ago.

    "How is your arm doing?"

    She shrugged, "I never really notice it,"

    "I do," I mumbled. "Every time." It would be difficult for her to understand. Every instant I touch her now doubles her chance of me instantaneously killing her. In a way, she was on her deathbead.

    .:{{Arisa's Perspective}}:.

    I was still exhausted from our long trip to the mountains and all of the hours I had slept hardly helped any. Unfortunately, I was awakened rudely by the feeling of vomit coming up my throat. I was happy, though, that Kai and I were taking the time away from home to take a vacation. I couldn't wait to start the real vacationing; what with the hiking and...other stuff.

    "Can I help with breakfast?" I offered; I was becoming too bored just sitting at the counter.

    Kai stepped away from the stove and gestured to the skillet with the rice in it, "Be my guest, Mademoiselle,"

    I blushed lightly as I stepped over to the stove. Cautiously, I gripped the warm handle of the skillet but, to my surprise, Kai wrapped his arms around me to hold his hands over mine--probably so I wouldn't drop the skillet. I couldn't feel his breath on my skin; he was holding his breath, probably to limit his intake of my scent.

    "We're going to flip the rice," he whispered into my ear. "Are you ready?"

    I shook my head frantically, "I'll kill both of us,"

    Against my will, Kai assisted me in flipping the rice in the skillet. I held my breath and closed my eyes, waiting for our breakfast to spill all over the place. But as soon as I had opened my eyes, I saw that only a couple of grains of rice didn't survive the fall. Kai chuckled in my ear and kissed the top of my head and congratulated me. I released the skillet and sat back down at the bar; I had enough excitement for one day.

    "So if you've had enough excitement for today, does that mean you're not up for tonight?" Kai looked over at me with a sprouting smirk.

    Instead of my heart leaping in excitement, it sunk deeply in worry, "But it hurts you to touch me. At all."

    Kai's smirk disappeared and he looked down at our breakfast, "I've managed to suppress the pain thus far,"

    I shook my head and crossed my arms on the counter, resting my chin on my arms, "I don't want to if it hurts you,"

    Kai reached over the counter and cupped my face, pulling my face very close to his. I could see the pain he was suppressing in his eyes; it hurt him so much just to inhale my scent. He stared at me seriously and kept his eyes locked on mine, "You possessed that feeling last night; you were in heat. I won't allow you to go against your wishes; just be aware that I love you so dearly that I attempt to ignore the pain that is supposed to make me suffer."

    He was right; I had been craving to be in his arms again for the longest time since our last time over two weeks ago. I wanted to last night but I was feeling sick and exhausted. I was still feeling just a little nauseous but the bug I had wasn't as severe. Just as Kai would suppress his pain to hold me, I would suppress my urge to make love with him again.

    I love Kai dearly as well. But why would Kai do such a thing to himself?