Twilight

• Artist: jgirl39
• Description: Something I wrote for school. No, it's not about the book series, so don't even think about mentioning it.
• Date: 02/14/2009
• Tags: twilight rhyme apocalypse fight

A single stream runs through the land,
Not pausing to stare at the endless fight.
Between the world of bone-chilling shadow
And that of eye-searing light.

Their arguments will never cease
For neither is wrong, and neither is right.
But sometimes the water dries out, disappears
And the lands of fire and ice unite.

Comments

[Gravetye]

Definitely like this, especially the second stanza. Good work.

[Pyrrhic Victini]

You do a good job with the short & sweet bit of it. You want to hear more, but the meaning of the piece would be lost if there was anymore. I'm just unsure if I would chose fire & ice to use because they're very common.

[The Fallen 19]

It's kind of erie, but I really like it.

[darkangel9194]

It's really good. I don't see any grammatical errors and the layout is great.