• She walks alone, in darkness. Her mind wandering the earth like a ghost, searching but never finding.
    Eyes as cold as ice, frozen in time with the thoughts of another life, another time.
    But distracted by one who is not in that time, but of current. Is he the key to her future? Will she be happy?
    Or will it be another disappointment. She holds her head high as she passes the people around her, giving off an aura of pride and hiding her true feelings.
    Inside she is bleeding; torn open and it won’t stop.
    No matter how hard she tries, she can’t seem to get that one person from her mind, from the other life.
    It haunts her. Is it worth her effort to remember? Or is she wasting time, to truly understand that the other life was just a dream, a reality that never happened, but in hopes.
    She believed in it once, that there was such a thing as love, but love broke her heart in pieces, and left her for dead.
    Love blinded her for what that person really was.
    A monster in disguise. Unsure of what to do, she ponders.
    Thinking of her next move. She is currently with a person, but can she learn to love him, as she thought she once did another?
    Can she forgive and forget as he told her, that other person?
    She wants to pray for love, just one more shot at it.
    And hopefully this time, the person is not a monster, but someone who can love without hurting her.
    She walks alone in this world, wondering what to do, and where to go.
    She is like the river, she just follows the path laid before her by god, and prays it leads her somewhere safe, and to someone of her true love.
    But is there such thing as true love? She wonders.
    Once she believed it, but now, she denies the thought.
    It shattered her, and it killed her soul. No more does she want anything to do with love.
    The boy she is with, she doesn’t truly love him. How can one love again, when that first person meant so much, and then brought her down so far? How can you repeat the same feelings twice, when it was hard the first time? She does not know, but she is sure, some day, she will be able to feel emotions once again.
    Until then, she is stone cold, and unwilling.
    Still needing to be mended, she hides from the world around her, to lick her wounds, and heal.
    But she is continuously found, and pestered by people. Growing weary of them, she runs and hides again.
    What to do, oh poor child of mine, how thou feels nothing but pain and sorrow.
    Poor child indeed for thine is the suffering of heart break.
    You needn’t fear what is out there, but reach for it, willingly, and with a smile on your face.
    Don’t fear them, but invite them in. Do thou harden in pain still?
    Are you fixing yourself, or are you going to let yourself bleed out child?
    Bring yourself together. Hold steady and stay strong. Child of darkness, bring forth light into your eyes, not this hatred for man.
    Not again, as you once did in that other life, behind you now, all behind you. Live on, as a new person. Be an angel and not a demon you once were. Grow warmth, harvest the light, and tarnish the dark. Sing your song once more oh child, and sing it sweetly, without the sorrow.
    You hold tight to the other life, why wallow in pain when you could be feeling joy?
    You walk alone in this world. Why do you not choose to have a partner? Where is your partner? Will you find one, or let yourself continue to wander the earth in solitude and in sorrow.
    Do not be fooled by facades, you can see the truth behind the masks.
    Is he worth it or is he not? You decide, child. Will you ask for another chance? Or will you ask for a life of solitude, so that you may die as you planned.
    You are alone and afraid. You are afraid to reach out, afraid to be touched. Hidden beneath a mask of lies, and strength, you reside of current.
    Why do you hide? What is it you are afraid of? Getting hurt again, when you are already broken and have not fully healed yet? He walked out on me.
    Left me to die, and watched as I bled out in front of him. He doesn’t care.
    He never did. And I was so strong in belief he was the one. He led me to think it was real, that it wasn’t a dream. And then he broke me to pieces!
    Tore me apart from the inside out like a ragdoll and a dog.
    I was his prey, another girl to which he feasted on her, sucked her dry of emotions.
    Built me up and tore me down like a city wall. No longer, he told me, should I have feelings for him.
    To get rid of them, and move on. It is hard, to move on when everything seemed so good, for so long.
    To think I had promised myself to a monster of his kind.
    A demon by nature, true demon. And he spoke so fondly of how he hated them.
    An angel by looks, but with a demonic aura that invites you in, sucks you into it, and then when all is good and well, he kills you.
    What did I ever do, to deserve it? To deserve to have my soul taken and broken.
    I prayed to god for someone to love and to love me in return.
    What I get is someone with facades and masks that broke me down.
    Am I all right? Am I alive still or am I in hell finally? He found another easily. And I must say I am jealous. The girl he met at his college, the one he told me was more beautiful than I.
    To what am I supposed to say to that? I hope she finds out what kind of monster he really is.
    What blood runs through his veins?
    Kill him with my bare hands. And find a new life to live.
    Or give him a gun, put it to my head and tell him to pull the trigger. I should let him kill me instead, so I will not suffer any more.
    I don’t want this to be my ending, being lonesome and in a terrible mess.
    He was the one thing that mattered most to me in this world.
    I gave him my heart, willingly and he broke it. So I will break something of his. He is cruel, the true vision of cruelty and hate.
    Arise in him an anti Christ, and we will have the apocalypse.
    I let him get to me, and I still do. But I will have my revenge. I will take back what is mine.
    Give him my blood instead of my heart. And then I will be happy.
    Then I can die in peace with the world behind me.
    It is pathetic how sometimes I can still cry for him. But no more, not now not ever again.
    And so I walk the earth alone, till the day I see him, and hand him the gun. And I tell him to pull the trigger. He will do it, he better do it, and if not I will make him kill me. Today, I walk the Earth, in total darkness, for it is what I deserve.