1001 Things U DONT wanna hear over a Star Destroyer intercom

[Sayla-girl]

"Attention crew. We have just recieved word that the Chupaqueso machine is broken."  

[Jaden_Ordo]

*Intercom turns on* Howsa yousa drive this thinga?  

[ElladanKenet]

"Gungan Season Is Officially Closed"  

[Nelowulf]

"Today we are holding student driving tests for new pilots for the Star destroyer in the belts of Geonosis, so don't panic."  

[ElladanKenet]

Force Ghost: ...And MacVader cannot die by any of woman born.

Vader: Heck ya! Immortal baby!

Force Ghost: And you have no fear until Hoth Asteroids march to Bast Castle!

Vader: Heck ya! Yeah! YEAH!

Piett: Er... sir?

Vader: Huh? What is it now?!

Piett: Sir, the Millenium Falcon has entered an asteroid field, and we can't-

Vader: Asteroid fields do not consern me Admiral...

Piett: But so, they're moving!  

[Sayla-girl]

"Anyone ever Fly one of these things before?"  

[Sol Walker]

"Did everyone sign Sherry's Birthday card?"  

[Missing00]

"Just as a notice, the men's restrooms on the following floors are closed for cleaning and repairs: Floors 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 10, 11, 12, 17, 25, 26, 28, 35, 38, 40, 42, 47, 49, 58, 56, 61, 62, 63, 64, 75, 81, 85, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, and floor 99. Thank you."  

[ElladanKenet]

Vader: Where is my latte'?!  

[Darkened Angel]

Officer: Attention all personal. We have recently installed a radio into the system, so you can all enjoy listening to music during lengthy hyperspace jumps. Unfortunately, it's broken currently so please enjoy this 3-day marathon of Mambo #5.  

[ElladanKenet]

Announcer: Lord Vader, please report to the Command Deck. Your lattee' has been found all over the life support controls.  

[Johnny Malone]

STAMPEDE!

(In those tight halls an already bad situation would be so much worse.)  

[The Lady Anne Boleyn]

Palpy: Princess Leia! I've missed you so much! Its been torture!
Leia: Oh! Your Highness! I have dreamed of you ever since we first met.
Palpy: Come to me, my love! I need you!
Leia: *runs to Palpy* Hold me!
*doors slide open*
Vader: Leia! What have I told you about getting involved with the Emperor?!
Leia: But Daddy! I love him! We were meant for eachother!
Vader: Just wait til your mother hears about this!
Leia: But-
Vader: No!! You are GROUNDED young lady!!! GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!!!
*Leia pouts then leaves*
Palpy: (sarcastically) Way to go, Darth.
Vader: What?
Palpy: I was gonna propose to her tonight after dinner!!!!(long pause)*taps intercom mic*Is this thing on . . . ?
Vader: (sarcastically) Way to go, Master!
Palpy: OH, SHUT- UP!!!!!!
*static*  

[Sol Walker]

"All Personel are invited to Sherry's birthday party on C-deck. Stormtroopers are expected to stay at their stations, however, in light of their conduct at the LAST Birthday party."  

[AFK Masturbating]

Intercom: Wow, maaaaaaan. This is far out. *hits bong*