1001 Things U DONT wanna hear over a Star Destroyer intercom

[Nelowulf]

(Ah dexter's lab. I have fond nicknames from that era...)

Intercom: This is Admiral Bee-yach to base camp, it seems the stormtroopers have gone on strike, and I don't know how to drive this...  

[Jaden_Ordo]

Thrawn: I am stepping down from my command and giving it to my new successor, Jar Jar Binks.
JarJar: Mesa so happy!

Stormies: eek  

[Darkened Angel]

Intercom: We are experiencing a rebel ambush. Just a reminder, escape pods are located on decks 3, 5, and 9.  

[ElladanKenet]

Darth Vader- Surprise strip search inspection!  

[ElladanKenet]

Tarkin- As part of the new Rule by Fear Regime, R&D has come up with the most fear-instilling stormtrooper armor to date. Therefore, by Imperial Degree, the official Imperial uniform is now an Elmo costume.  

[Darkened Angel]

Intercom: Empire, come alive! To find out where the rebels hide is tricky! It's tricky, tricky, tricky tricky!
Intercom: * smack * You idiot! That's not even a good parody. Attention all hands. Disregard the previous statement. You are now listening to... * heavy metal * your favorite DJ, Dr. Death Metal!  

[x-kiri-kun-x]

"Oh...I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok..."  

[ElladanKenet]

Vader-

Everybody's dooooo-iiiiing. a brand new dance-now, come ooooooooon baby, do the lo-co-mo-tion.

I know you're gonna like it, if ya give it a chaaaaaance now, come oooooooooon baby, do the lo-co-mo-tion.

Now little baby Si-ith can, do it with ea-ase, it's easy as-a learning yourrrr ABCs.

So come on! Come! Dooooooooooo the lo-co-mo-tion with me!

You gotta swing your hips now!..... Come on! Jump baaaaack!...... Jump baaaack!

Now do the thang you got-to knoooooooooo-whoa-whoa!


Well, now that you can doooo-it, well, let's make a chain now! Come ooooooooooooooooon baby, do the lo-co-mo-tion.

A chuga-chuga motion, like a reaaaaaaaaal train now! Come ooooooooooooooooon baby, do the lo-co-motion.

Do it nice and easy, and don't lose con-troooool-ol-ol. A little bit o' rythem and a lot o' soul-ol-ol, and COME ON, COME ON, dooooooooooooo the locomotion with me!  

[Darkened Angel]

Vader: It has come to my attention that the forces aboard this ship are lacking in coordination. Therefore, until further notice, all troops are to spend 2 hours each day in choreographed dance training. I will not stand to have my forces fight the rebels without professional moves!  

[Black Baoz]

Vader: Because of low money we've had to rent rooms in the death star out to Jedis and thier family... Hope they don't hold grudges....  

[Sol Walker]

"The enemy has taken our Intelligence!"  

[Black Baoz]

Vader: Has anyone seen my PS3 memory card?
Emperor: (background) Did you check by the coat rack... Of doom, people!  

[ElladanKenet]

Comm Officer: Another reminder, that Lord Vader's Battlefront 2 sessions requires 15 volunteers for their Live-Action performance. All those willing to join please sign up on the datapad located in the MedBay. Thank you.  

[Darkened Angel]

Intercom: A fatal has occured on Life Support. Please reboot and try again.  

[ElladanKenet]

Vader- Alright, who clogged up the fresher?