The Funniest thing you've ever said/heard

[Cass Dee of Corvictory]

Okay. This is simple as hell. (How is hell simple? FIRE! jk)
Just post the funniest thing that you've said to someone on Gaia or in real life.

One thing I've said over the phone is:
"Where are you? Let me kick your a**."  

[Sakasama Datenshi]

On gaia I told my friend "I'm going to bed with or without you" ^^  

[JDBReaper]

a few times irl, when someone saids that I'm a smartass, I say "rather be a smartass than a dumbass" n they laugh  

[chidorilash]

The funniest thing I have said to someone...um, *thinks* Oh oh I got it!

Friend: *smells something cooking*What's that smell?
Me: *monotone voice* Oh, that's just my hopes an dreams burning.

I have dark humor...or so my friends say, I don't see how that is true.

 

[Joeyfish5]

Meh i dont know which of my jokes are funny or w.e  

[hazel843]

Once my friend was drinking from this really thin straw and I said, "Aw I hate those straws, you keep sucking and sucking and nothing comes out and i just realised how wrong that sounds"  

[ArcticWolf - Kiba]

I haven't said anything funny that I can remember.

._.

 

[iPolkaPuppy]

when i first tried flirting with my crush i never flirted b4
and i asked him " Whats your Favorite disease?"  

[Kitten254]

my sister, my mom, my best friend melina, and me were all in the car and we were talking about how if my sis had another kid she was in for it...so she said,
"If I had another kid, I would be screwed"
and I said out of no where out of habit,
"Literally"
And everyone in the car said my name at the same time in the same tone and we all laughed are asses off all the way to melina's house where we dropped her off giggling.....its still funny to this very day  

[HyperActiveEmo205]

hmmm i say alot of funny things with my friends but one recent one was hmmmmmm gosh wheres seki when i need her well i think one i said is well my friends and i were at last nights football game and we were sitting down seki ichigo and maki on the bottom and me and kyoko on top seki was under kyoko as in seats and kyoko was talking about pbs kids and seki sang PBSKIDS*throws head obnocious onto kyokos lap and looks at the sky* .ORG that was funny i have to get bak to u though about me because i have bad memory of things i did and so i have to ask my friend but i will be bak  

[Toastur]

in my math class <.< "i cant do this by myself u have to do it with me"and he gave me a weird stare xD  

[abandoned_nr_5448214]

Hmm, I usually don't know and rarely remembers when I say/write something funny. Usually it's a punchline related to a rather lengthy discussion.
You should ask Myst for my funny sayings - she is better at spotting them that I XP

One of the shorter and more recent ones:
Random person: "Why is the weather bad" (not that really isn't a very intelligent thing to say IMO - but it did serve a purpose)
Me: "In my experience, it's usually because one of them clouds have soaked up a big deal of water somewhere and now needs to take a leak over your house. :/ "

Sometimes, the English language is so cooperative <3 That one wouldn't have worked in Swedish.  

[MystiBlu]

O gawd! Aryllia just cracks me up sometimes - without even trying! You never know what she might say! But for actual quotes, I will have to do some research in my archives.
As for me...sometimes I just say ordinary things that get sooo taken out of context.

One of Aryllia's all time faves, I think, is: Crotch Rocket. Sometimes I forget that not everybody uses the same slang.

So, now here's a story that is kinda amusing. One of my older brothers had a friend over and they were working on my bro's car and I (15 and very VERY naive) happened to walk past and notice a bolt on the ground by one of the tires. So I picked it up and, just as my bro's friend was taking a drink of soda, looked at the friend and said "Want a screw?" Thank goodness I wasnt standing right in front of him cuz that soda turned his nose into a fountain and I thought my brother was gonna choke to death. LoL I just stood there, blonde that I am, batting my eyelashes, n said "Well?" then shook my head at them, laid the bolt on the bumper of the car and walked off.  

[Joeyfish5]

MystiBlu

O gawd! Aryllia just cracks me up sometimes - without even trying! You never know what she might say! But for actual quotes, I will have to do some research in my archives.
As for me...sometimes I just say ordinary things that get sooo taken out of context.

One of Aryllia's all time faves, I think, is: Crotch Rocket. Sometimes I forget that not everybody uses the same slang.

So, now here's a story that is kinda amusing. One of my older brothers had a friend over and they were working on my bro's car and I (15 and very VERY naive) happened to walk past and notice a bolt on the ground by one of the tires. So I picked it up and, just as my bro's friend was taking a drink of soda, looked at the friend and said "Want a screw?" Thank goodness I wasnt standing right in front of him cuz that soda turned his nose into a fountain and I thought my brother was gonna choke to death. LoL I just stood there, blonde that I am, batting my eyelashes, n said "Well?" then shook my head at them, laid the bolt on the bumper of the car and walked off.

LOLZ rofl
Yes i do Jailbait XP  

[tigris cobaltchaos]

Joeyfish5

MystiBlu

O gawd! Aryllia just cracks me up sometimes - without even trying! You never know what she might say! But for actual quotes, I will have to do some research in my archives.
As for me...sometimes I just say ordinary things that get sooo taken out of context.

One of Aryllia's all time faves, I think, is: Crotch Rocket. Sometimes I forget that not everybody uses the same slang.

So, now here's a story that is kinda amusing. One of my older brothers had a friend over and they were working on my bro's car and I (15 and very VERY naive) happened to walk past and notice a bolt on the ground by one of the tires. So I picked it up and, just as my bro's friend was taking a drink of soda, looked at the friend and said "Want a screw?" Thank goodness I wasnt standing right in front of him cuz that soda turned his nose into a fountain and I thought my brother was gonna choke to death. LoL I just stood there, blonde that I am, batting my eyelashes, n said "Well?" then shook my head at them, laid the bolt on the bumper of the car and walked off.

LOLZ rofl
Yes i do Jailbait XP

rofl
*can't breathe*
rofl