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Why Women Can't Marry More Than One Husband In One Time

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iKurma

PostPosted: Thu Jun 16, 2011 4:56 am


In a delightful report about how Imam Abu Hanifa received his name (his original name was Numan bin Thabit bin Zuta bin Mah), an account of why the wife is forbidden to take more than one husband is recounted.

'Abu Hanifa' is an unusual name because it means 'the father of Hanifah', and Hanifah was his daughter. It was not the custom in those days to do this. Normally, the name would be 'the father of the name of a son.' How this came about is quite edifying.

One day Imam Abu Hanifa was asked a question that, for the first time in his illustrious career, he was unable to answer. The question was, "Why were women forbidden to marry more than one husband at a time?"

To make a long story short, Abu Hanifa's daughter said that she knew the answer and would solve this question if her father would make a promise to her that if she succeeded in solving this problem, he would then assure her a place in history. Abu Hanifa agreed.

So she gathered a group of women together and gave each of them a cup. Then she brought in a large bowl of milk and asked each of them to dip their cups in the milk and to fill their cups. They did so. She then asked them to pour back the milk into the bowl. They did this too. She then asked them to re-fill their cups taking back only their own milk that they had poured into the bowl.

This, obviously, was impossible to do. Hanifah had clearly demonstrated the kind of predicament that would be created if a woman had several husbands. With more than one husband, if she were to become pregnant, she would have exceptional difficulties determining who the actual father was? Identifying parentage and lineage would then be insurmountable for the offspring. Imam Abu Hanifa was so pleased with her answer that he took the name 'Abu Hanifa', 'the father of Hanifah', so his daughter did indeed earn a place in history.

Source: iLuvislam
PostPosted: Sat Jul 02, 2011 10:25 am


Well nowadays they can do DNA tests... i don't think thats a problem aymore... you know what i mean?? Im very proud that im muslim but sometimes i feel like there are sexist stuff, i know there a reason for everything in the quran but some things dont really go with our lives these days ... and there are so many examples .

OhhSalma


iKurma

PostPosted: Sat Jul 02, 2011 8:24 pm


Can you name some of them? I'm quite interested to hear about them.

Well, of course the one I posted is not the entire reason. It's just one of them.
Islam knows best about a woman's right. I mean, come on. You would not want to have sex with several men in one time. Even in the nowadays' world, female with many sex partners are lumped as 'slut'. Even in biologically, woman are more committed to love only one man in her entire life.
PostPosted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 4:00 am


ok well for example before when an old man dies they devide the money and i think the son takes 2 thirds or something bottom line , he takes more then the daughter and it was devided like that because men had a family to support and women didn't have jobs , but now women and men both work and they both have a family to support therefore the money should be devided by half, at least thats what i think... moreover , there is a social idea that its ok if a man married or/and had many girlfriends but if a woman did that she'll be called a slut as you said , and thats sexist , and i know its wrong for men and women . so in my opinion , there is no equality , and IM SURE that god have endless reasons to set these rules but i just feel like its a little bit sexist . BUT DONT GET ME WRONG , i'll apply all the thing that god said regardless of what i think. So basicly what im saying is that the things that the rules were based on dont really match our lives at this time , i know that islam liberated women , but im saying that as we develop and our lives develop , our habits and perspective should also develop .

OhhSalma


Lavianos

PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 7:44 am


I don't know where it is socially acceptable for a man to have many girlfriends..o.O

Well I understand what your thoughts are, the deal is, if women are being given lesser in balance at one end, at another point they are being given more than the man.
example the division of money by a dying man, a woman is being given less than than the man, true. But the reason behind this is because a man is morally and legally bound to spend his earning on his wife, his kids and his parents for their well being. However on the other hand the wife is not bound to spend a single penny on anyone and she will not be held accountable for not spending it, she is giving the right to keep it all to herself in the Quran itself.

So what the man recieves is further divided to be given to more people, but the women gets to keep the whole lump.
PostPosted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 6:36 am


OhhSalma
ok well for example before when an old man dies they devide the money and i think the son takes 2 thirds or something bottom line , he takes more then the daughter and it was devided like that because men had a family to support and women didn't have jobs , but now women and men both work and they both have a family to support therefore the money should be devided by half, at least thats what i think... moreover , there is a social idea that its ok if a man married or/and had many girlfriends but if a woman did that she'll be called a slut as you said , and thats sexist , and i know its wrong for men and women . so in my opinion , there is no equality , and IM SURE that god have endless reasons to set these rules but i just feel like its a little bit sexist . BUT DONT GET ME WRONG , i'll apply all the thing that god said regardless of what i think. So basicly what im saying is that the things that the rules were based on dont really match our lives at this time , i know that islam liberated women , but im saying that as we develop and our lives develop , our habits and perspective should also develop .


Yes, true women do works and play much bigger role in society today. But let us get this straight, in Islam, it is not a woman's responsibility to afford the family. It is much preferable for women to stay in the house to avoid fitnah.

A working mother will be unable to dedicate herself and perform at best in her roles as a wife and mother figure because half of her dedication lies on works. This will, most often create a distance between the children and the mother. The children will likely to get mixed with bad stuff.

Let me ask you, to whom has Allah grant greater responsibility on taking care of the children? And to whom should the children respect most?

Aisyah R.A. asked Rasulullah S.A.W.:
To whom should a woman put her dedication and love?
The Prophet S.A.W. replied: To her husband.
Aisyah R.A. asked Rasulullah again:
To whom should a man (husband) put her dedication and love?
The Prophet S.A.W. replied: To her mother (woman).

It shows that woman indeed, plays an important role to 'shape a human'. Of course as science and technology develop, women are more prone to be working sometimes due to family issue. But after she get married, it is no longer her responsibility to afford herself nor the family.

'Those who married, as if they complete half of the religion/iman.'

Sorry for my crappy translation and grammar, English is not my first language.

iKurma


Wandertoal-Haqq

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:03 pm


Masha'allah, there are good answers here! Another wisdom behind men being allowed up to four wives could be that there are naturally more women than men in the world! Even if every woman was to be married, there would be many women who would be left unmarried! Subhan'Allah...& Allahu Alim (God knows best).
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