"Fi."
"Fi. Fiiiiii. FI."
The pink-maned hyena being addressed made it a point to completely ignore his red partner in spite of his increasing volume, and continued to ignore him right up until the bone setter thudded into him, throwing his forelegs over his neck and gnawing on his ears. "Dammit, Tam, quit that!" he swore, all the while flailing about and trying to dislodge his supposed friend. "Stop! Le'go my EAR, you a**!"
"a**? You're ignoring me, and I'm the a**?" Tambol continued to ruffle and chew his fellow hyena's ears, making it a point to slobber excessively while doing so, just to up the irritation factor.
"For the thousandth time, my name is not Fi! It's Hafifu!" Finally, the scout managed to get his friend off of his neck (and more importantly, his ears), and gave him a shove for good measure. "HA-FI-FU. Stop getting it wrong!"
"Hafifu's too long," Tambol complained, snapping at the air between them as the shove sent him staggering a few steps to the side. "You call me Tam, why can't I call you Fi?"
"Because I say so, that's why!" When Tambol swerved back his way, Hafifu swatted him on the nose, prompting another snap. But they'd had this little 'argument' countless times before, and there was no real malice inherent in any of it. "It's Hafifu, or nothing!"
"Alright. Have it your way, Nothing. I- oof!" The speckled bone setter was unprepared for the sheer force of the other hyena coming down on top of him, and crumpled under the weight of him. And in his helplessness, he found himself on the receiving end of an ear-gnawing...with liberal slobber, of course. He writhed, and snarled, and squirmed, and laughed, and soon enough they were wrestling like pups.
Pups who were supposed to be patrolling (well, Hafifu was supposed to be patrolling, Tambol was just bored and harassing him). Their impromptu wrestling match lasted for several minutes, before it ended with the both of them breathless and panting. They lay that way for several more minutes, until Hafifu delibarately shifted his position on top of Tambol so that his elbows were digging into his friend, who promptly shoved him off. The scout made an exaggerated show of tumbling to the side, as though he'd been pushed with greater force than he really had. The end result was him laying on his back, fur all a mess and having been liberally drooled on, with his tongue hanging out of his mouth while he stared at Tambol upside-down. All in all, he looked absolutely, completely ridiculous, and he knew it.
He was fully expecting Tambol to laugh at him, but his doofish look was met with silence. Hafifu narrowed his eyes in annoyance. The bone setter wasn't even looking at him! "Aww, c'mon, Tam, really? What's over there that's so interesting? It's just more rocks and stuff!"
"Shh!" A paw slapped down on his lower jaw, forcing him to be quiet - though he did his best to yelp, since Tambol had just made him bite his own tongue. "Shut up, Fi. Look!"
Had he been able to speak, Hafifu would very politely have asked Tambol to let him up, because he was upside down and being stood upon, and thus couldn't see a gods damned thing. Since he couldn't, however, he had to get the point across with flailing and muffled insults that he totally would not have used otherwise. Really. Eventually, after boxing his friend in the face with his paw, he was able to get to his feet and see what the fuss was about.
There was a lion. A lion! A lioness, to be more specific, a white one, all covered in weird flowery markings. Ew. Despite the not inconsiderable commotion they'd been making, she didn't seem to have noticed them. She was apparently too busy trying to keep herself from falling down, not moving in a straight line - or anything even remotely resembling one - weaving back and forth rather badly. Ordinarily, rather than waste time watching her, they would have chased her off, but this situation was hardly ordinary. Rather, it was pretty freaking hilarious watching a creature they would normally have considered a threat stagger around. It was only a matter of time before she fell, and once she did, neither of them could contain themselves any longer.
The two hyenas' sniggering turned into full-blown fits of laughter, and that finally got the lioness' attention. Her head snapped up, and there was genuine fear in her blue eyes when they lighted upon the shrieking scavengers. She gasped and scrambled and tried to get back on her feet, but only fell again, eliciting further laughter from the pair. After laughing themselves breathless, it was a wonder they were able to wheeze any semblance of a conversation at each other.
"Look, look, look at it," Tambol chortled bumping shoulders with his partner.
"I know, I know!" Hafifu delighted, and they chuckled some more until an idea struck the dark-pelted hyena. "We should take her, Tam. Let's take her!"
"Huh? Take her? You crazy, Fi?"
"I'm not crazy! We can have ourselves a lion! Got plenty of dogs, but nobody's got a lion. C'mon, Tam, it'll be awesome!"
"Maaaaybe, but...but we don't even know what's wrong with her! She might be sick or- or defective or something," he protested, though he was clearly tempted by the idea.
"You're the bone setter, genius, check her out! Or, you know what- Hey! Hey, lion! What's wrong with you?" Hafifu jumped forward and jabbed at her with a forepaw, hard.
She yelped and tried to scramble away again, but he followed her and snapped his jaws and repeated the question. She gave a little shriek and cringed away, but answered. "I think I b-broke something, I was hunting and I-"
"That's enough!" Hafifu cut her off. "You don't need to ramble. See, Tam? Just an accident, no diseases or defects! Aside from being a lion, that is." He paused to laugh at his own joke before continuing, "So she comes with us, you bone setter her, and we have a lion!"
"Alright, alright, but if she has something and I catch it, I'm giving it to you. a**."
