[PRP] Deep in the Mountains (Snow Spirits )

[AislingJuno]

This is a private roleplay between members of the Snow Spirit group.

-If you are a member and you would like to be included-please pm me and Herd intrest-

Aisling's Teepee

 

[AislingJuno]

. The wind had a bit of a bite to it, not as much as winter wind did. Still many soq would shiver and fear hypothermia. However Xue Fang family had lived in high altitudes for many generations. Over time their kind had grown used to lower oxygen levels. They were snow spirits born of Yuki Onna's gifted with resistance to cold conditions. While the wind was chilly to other soq Xue Fang thought the wind was being playful. It was spring and the vernal equinox had already passed. There is still time to enjoy traveling down to low lands but when summer came the herd would have to limit their activities to the Eastern Mountains. Hot weather was not they're friend. Snow spirits were built for cold conditions. They had big a body mass and fluffy tails or fur. Like a Siberian tiger the cold weather suited them but their physical body would suffer in hot temperatures. A trip to the desert would be very dangerous for one with even a little bit of Snow Spirit blood. Since ancient times the yuki onna herds had allowed other soq with animal traits to be adopted into the herd to strengthen the bloodline. This allowed later generations of yuki onna's to have more of a resistance against warmer conditions but over heating was still a problem. Xue Fang had more of old Yuki onna blood rushing through his veins his power of the mist stronger then his cousins because of theses traits he was more sensitive to heat and had to worry more about overheating. Unlike his cousins that traveled off the Eastern Mountains he was content to stay on the herd lands. His low resistance to heat was part of the reason but the main reason was that he was the herds leader. He needed to always stay in the mountains so he could protect their land if the need arose. If soq that were not allies of the herd learned of their existence and their own of secrecy could not be trusted it was his duty to find them and kill them. The safety of herd was important it was his job to protect his herd. Part of him was still angry that after all they had been through one of his cousins had broken herd tradition and had turned her back on the herd. She had broken all herd law and had deeply hurt her sisters and him. The family never spoke her name anymore and when they were born new snow spirits would know nothing about her. She could have easily kept with herd traditions and could have had everything she wanted but she had made her own decisions. In time memory of her would fade away but for know Xue Fang would watch over the rest of his herd and make sure the tragedies of the past would not happen again.  

[AislingJuno]

Kukiko stared at the nearby mountains her face scrunched up in a frown. There was not enough snow on the mountain tops. There was always snow on tops of the mountains but the amount varied from month to month and from season to season. Kukiko sensed her times of free travel was coming to an end. She quite enjoyed the freedom the colder season brought. Kukiko was the head hunter for her herd and she often traveled far from the herd lands in search of prey. It was exciting to travel out and see new terrain. To pit her wits against the environment while respecting the forces of nature .She often had to fight other soq who thought it would be easy to attack a female out by herself regardless of her giant size. She was a survivor and she was strong but she also fought dirty. She would use whatever means possible to gain the upper head and she could be vindictive and bloodthirsty if she felt their was danger to her herd. Her herd was her family and their warmth saved her from the black despair that surrounded her heart. A piece of her heart still cried out for justice . However justice would not be served and the safety of her family was more importance justice even if a part of her heart burned for retribution . Sometimes when she was far from her herds land and was alone with no chance of discovery. She would scream out in agony over her old herds death. The emotions could only be contained for so long before she needed a release of some kind. The death of her old herd tore at her heart like a thorn embedded in her flesh. She did not want her sister or cousin to know but before the attack she had been close to lifemating with a male. During the attack he was one of the herd members that was killed. His loss was a secret she held deep inside. Her sisters and cousins were all mourning for the lost herd and family. She did not want to add to their burden and make them dwell on the attack. So she bore the pain inside and when she was deep in the mountains she would scream and allow the tears she bottled up to fall freely down her face and onto the ground. The mountains would not share her secrets. Being by herself was a freeing experience. Running on the flat land below the mountain range was dazzling. She loved the feeling of the wind grabbing her hair and blowing it around. Kukiko liked to discover new flowers and plant life that couldn't be found on the mountain range. With the warmer months she would mourn losing a part of the freedom she enjoyed.  

[AislingJuno]

Miyuki Stared at her family her face lit up in a smile as her heart warmed with feeling. She quite enjoyed being surrounded by her family it was a balm to her soul. She especially enjoyed being around Kaneq the newest member to the herd. For some time she had been particularly worried that his physical and mental being was suffering some shock because of the change to his circumstances. For a time it seemed like his soul was not accepting life in the Eastern mountains. Miyuki was the healer for her herd, To her being a healer was not just a vocation but a true calling. As a foal she had an interest in herbal plant life and in saving small animals. She would often bring small animals to her families cave and try to nurse them back to health. As a young adult she studied medicine underneath a herd elder. The Elder was the lead healer of the herd as well as one of the three spiritual leaders of the herd. Asa the elder leader had taught Miyuki for many years and they had grown quite attached to each other. She had respected her elegant and knowledgeable teacher. Perhaps the reason why Miyuki liked elegant females and healers was because of the hero worship she felt for her teacher. She never had romantic feeling for her teacher but she learned to value those particular traits.
Under Asa teachings Miyuki had learned all the various local flora. Which plants could heal, what plants were poisonous and what plants could be used for spiritual ceremonies. She had been taught that even some poisonous plants had parts that could be used for healing. You just had to know which parts and what dosage to give to a patient. During her training under Asa , Miyuki had been poisoned many times. Some plants she had developed a resistance against. She would not enjoy it since she had a healers spirit but if she needed to kill another soq with poison she could. She often tested the herds drinking water with her silver hair stick. She did not believe her herd had to fear being poisoned but she had been taught to always be careful about threats to the herd. However the attack to the Yuki Onna herd by a fire herd had been a surprise to everyone. Her parents death,her cousin death Xue Fang's brother , Asa death and the death of all the other herd members who were like family to her. Her heart ached for their loss but she had said the sacred words over their bodies. She had hosted a ceremony to help bring their spirits to the other side. While she had mourned a part of her healed. She needed to heal first and as fast as she could. Miyuki could now accept what had happened though she still had nightmares breaking out in a cold sweat at the remembrance of those sad events.  

[AislingJuno]

Kaneq gazed in wonder as his icy breath showed against the snowy air. It was proof that he had changed. He had grown up in the low lands far away from the eastern mountains. Kaneq had lost his parents to an accident years ago when he was still a foal. His grandmother had raised him by herself. His grandfather had passed just before he was born. He was his parents only offspring and they had named him in honor of his grandfather that had died. For many years his family consisted of only he and his grandmother. It was just the two of them and his grandmother raised him as best she could. He had been a well behaved foal he tried to do the best he could to help his grandmother. He did not make mischief because he did not want to cause her worry or distress. Grandmother was always weak and she did not have much energy. Kaneq deeply loved his grandmother so he did the best he could to make sure she was happy and worry free. Grandmother was always worried that something would happen to him and he would end up in a dangerous situation. She feared she would lose him like she lost his father her son and her son's mate who had become a daughter to her. However it was his grandmother who had been lost to him. She had died of weak body that had made her older in body then was her actual years. He mourned her but he was happy she was once again with her parents who she had loved so much. For some time he traveled the soq lands but his hear yearned for companionship. Eventually he stumbled on a mare named Zenobia, she was not the most sane soq but she had dragon fly wings like his mother had and like he had. Through his travels he had seen many flutter soq with butterfly wings but dragonfly wings seemed to be rare. He started an uneasy friendship with Zenobia who thought of him as a friend though that what he liked to think she felt. He was probably giving himself more credit then he deserved because he actually felt like she treated him more like a pet dog that was protective of her. When Kukiko had stolen him from Zenobia, he had been in shock. Kukiko told him she smelled the scent of a snow spirit and when she followed the scent she had found him. After a few weeks of being lead unwillingly into the mountains. He started talking to her. After spending time in her company and exchanging stories with her it soon became apparent that his grandmother had come from a snow spirit herd. Her physical weakness the thing that had been strain on her body was because she had been too far away from the snow. The first month he stayed on the mountains was not easy. Mountain life was a culture shock but eventually he started to love being on the mountains. Here his body felt stronger and the cold had stopped bothering him. His body was already showing changes as his snow spirit blood awakened . Icy air now came from his breath and among the herd he had found a new family. He originally was not happy about being forced up into the mountain but now it was hard to imagine how life would be like away from the ice and the comfort of his new herd.  

[AislingJuno]

Xue Fang looked at the clouds that appeared to be racing across the sky. The wind high up in the heavens must be very strong to push the clouds so fast. Here the wind only pulled on the tips of his hair but did not tangle his mane. If the winds have been very strong he would've stayed inside the caves but it was not a hard wind just to wind that made it's presence known. He turned to his two cousins and his heart was content. He was glad to no longer be alone, though at times he gained comfort in being alone in the wildness of nature. Being alone truly alone was a depressing state of being. He had been alone for some time before his cousins arrival. During that time his mental state had been very turbulent. At one time he feared he would go made. He had become more of a feral being then a dignified Snow Spirit of legendary Yuki Onna blood. Despair was his best friend then and it accompanied him wherever he went. They and self-loathing had become the fuels that fed him. He would often stand in a cave in the eastern mountains and his mind would think on all the regrets he had. On his burning hate towards the fire herd that destroyed his herd and his own self hatred towards himself for not being able to stop the attack. He wondered why he had lived and so many others had died. He felt guilty for surviving the attack. He had been trained to be a warrior so why didn't he die with all the other snow spirit warriors. The attack a come out of nowhere and they had not been properly prepared. The herd knew a local fire herd had been envious of the herds territory . They had been prepared for one fire herd to attack them but they thought the strife been herds was coming to an end . They had been negotiating peace with that herd but they were unprepared during the conference. The fire herd had attacked them allied with other fire soq herds and mercenaries for hire. What was supposed to be a meeting for peace had turned into a bloodbath. Xue Fang fought injuring many fire soq and killing a few. Eventually he became unconscious due to fatigue and blood loss. He had survived because the mist that surround him covered him in his unconscious state. He should have been happy to survive but he wished he died because he was sure he was the last snow spirit alive. For some time after the attack he stayed near the fire herds territory. He liked to kill fire herd members when they traveled out by themselves . The fire herd called him the shade, a shadow creature that wanted to bath in their blood. Eventually Xue Fang became weary of killing. The memories of his herd were too much to bear this close to his herds territory. So he traveled far before eventually coming to the eastern mountains.  

[AislingJuno]

Kaneq gazed around something seemed to be going on in the herd that he didn't understand. Several herd members just seemed to be happy to gaze at the mountains and the sky. Well except for one of the girls the soft spoken healer. Miyuki seemed to be staring intently at Xue Fang like she was trying to speak with him without words. Xue Fang appeared to not have noticed. The herd leader was gazing at the sky in wonder and seemed oblivious to Miyuki's keen attention. Miyuki cleared her throat in a delicate manner her eyes staring holes into Xue Fang. Finally Xue Fang turned his attention toward Miyuki and the two of them seemed to have a silent battle of wills. However the gentle feminine mare did not look like she was going to back down. Kaneq was curious about what was bothering the mare but it wasn't his place to pry. He had been brought against his will to the eastern mountains and he was still settling in. He no longer felt like he was a prisoner but instead he felt the herd was becoming his family. Kaneq did not want to ask and create conflict in the herd. He was just starting to feel like a true herd member and he did not want to give the snow spirit herd any reason to reject him. In the beginning of his stay he was desperate to leave herd territory and get back to Zenobia. However now he was feeling a bit of fear that the snow spirit herd would suddenly reject him because he wasn't a pure blood. Before he had come to the eastern mountains he hadn't realized that his heart had a hole in at after his grandmother died. He had tried to fill the whole by being a companion to Zenobia but while she was somewhat affectionate she had seen him more like a pet dog .Kukiko by being selfish and taking him away from Zenobia had brought him surprising happiness. She probably had given him several more years to live as well. He had never realized that his body weakness was brought about by hot temperatures and by separation from snow. He had never realized before but his grandmother had died while still relatively young because she had been separated from the snow for so long. He wished he had known years ago that he grandmother had been physically suffering because she couldn't handle hot temperatures and separation from snow and ice. He would have been happy with her in the mountains. However he did not have the knowledge he now possessed. As he gazed at the mountain he felt a little melancholy because the mountains were beautiful. He knew his grandmother would've loved this place and she would've felt at home with the snow spirit herd.  

[AislingJuno]

Miyuki was not going to back down she had plenty to say. For far two long her sisters and cousin were walking on egg shells around a particular subject. Her cousin Xue Fang was their herd leader and he was letting her eldest sister Kukiko get away with stealing a male and bringing him into the herd. Miyuki knew Xue Fang was scared that another one of her sisters was going to leave the herd but he should step up. Not all the sisters were going to be a foolish as her youngest sister who broke all the herds rules. She understand somewhat that love could make a fool of any soq but the betrayal of her youngest sister still hurt. They had been through so much together that her sister forsaking them hurt and the fact that her youngest sister had not even tried to follow herd law. Miyuki Knew her cousin would have been flexible about creating an agreement with her youngest sister regarding herd laws but her sister had not even tried. It hurt that her sister was no longer with them, but she had made her own decisions. Herd law now dictated that the name of her younger sister was no longer to be spoken. If her sister wandered on to herd territory she would be driven off. If her youngest sister spoke herd secrets, their eldest sister would be forced to hunt their younger sister down. Miyuki did not want her eldest sister Kukiko to be responsible for such a task. If that they truly came, she would go out and handle the matter herself. Kukiko had already lost to much which was part of the reason Xue Fang was letting matter slide. Her sister thought she was keeping secrets from the family but they all knew that her sister had lost her perspective mate during the attack. They all knew how Kukiko secretly mourned so they held their tongue when she brought Kaneq home. They were also happy to have found another soq with snow spirit blood even if that blood had come from a different snow spirit herd. Kaneq was also rather dashing and he had a bit of the snow leopard blood which had died out in their original herd. Miyuki had worried for some time that Kaneq was not adjusting properly to their herd. As a healer she could not bear to see another soq suffer. She would speak and take on her whole family if it ment helping a patient. She turned her eyes to Xue Fang and tried to gain his attention. However she could not capture his eyes. He seemed to be deep in thought gazing at the mountains. She was losing patience, she let out a loud sigh .  

[AislingJuno]

Kukiko Knew trouble was heading her way. Her sister Miyuki seldom raised her voice or looked at others unkindly but Miyuki was not looking at her in a peaceful way. Her usual peaceful and feminine facade looked more like a cat getting ready to have a hissy fit. Kukiko seldom argued with Miyuki they were very close. Miyuki was the second born and closest and dearest to Kukiko. Kukiko loved all her sisters but Miyuki was the complete opposite of her. She was the yin to her yang. Together they were stronger and mentally healthier than when the were separated. Kukiko was outspoken a wild creature of nature. She was rough and tumble and loved anything fierce and bloody. She was attracted to masculine energy. Miyuki was her direct opposite in every way. Miyuki was graceful and elegant. She was the model of a lady, of all things feminine. She was also attracted to soq with more feminine energy. Miyuki tended to prefer females over males. She was also attracted to healers because of their shared interest. Miyuki also liked males that had more feminine looks and energy.She was soft spoken and rarely raised her voice. She was a good dancer and had an excellent voice when she could be tempted to sing. Miyuki had been trained as a healer from quite a young age. Miyuki had the ways of a healer. She was kind, patient, and could be quite firm. As Kukiko watched her sisters pink eyes narrow and a look of discontentment cross her face. Kukiko knew her sister was seriously upset and she hoped she was not the cause of her sisters frustration. Her sister had been trying to keep space between them them the last few days. Probably in an attempt to make Kukiko know she was not satisfied with a choice Kukiko had made. At least that was what seemed logical to Kukiko. She rarely read her sister wrong, they had been like two peas in a mod since they were young foals. Maybe her Miyuki was just busy or her mind was preoccupied. However while Kukiko hoped she was not the source of her sister frustration she felt in her bones that whatever was bothering her sister was related to her in some way. She had a feeling that her sister discontentment was probably over her bringing Kaneq into the herd. Her sister seemed to like Kaneq not in a romantic way since he was not to her taste but more in a friendly way. Her sisters upset could be because she had stolen Kaneq giving him no choice but to enter herd territory and then by forcing him to stay. Stealing males had been an old practice one that had no longer been practiced in her old herd. It was not against herd law but it wasn't needed. Since the numbers of snow spirits had dwindled so low she was not against riving old traditions. When she had first seen Kaneq she know at first sight and first scent that he carried Snow Spirit blood . He was not first generation more like second generation or third generation but his snow spirit blood was a temptation that she couldn't resist. She had stolen him from a wicked crazy soq that seemed to keep him as a pet and who prattled on about pumpkins and feeding the pumpkins enough blood before winter.  

[AislingJuno]

Xue Fang tried to concentrate on the sky for a few minutes longer. He had been receiving a prickling sensation between his shoulder blades all day. Clearing it was a sign, a foreboding that conflict was going to happen. Now unlike some Xue Fang didn't believe every time a object broke some tragedy was going to occur. He also didn't believe every time his ear itched some soq was talking about him. Few soq knew of his existence so he wasn't inclined to believe that bit of folklore. Not that he wasn't superstitious in his own way but he wasn't a soq to let superstitious behavior cloud his judgement. The elder in his birth herd had taught him that magic superstitions based on the principle of sympathetic magic, were broken into two different categories sympathetic and homeopathic magic also called contagious magic where like cured like . He had been taught these lessons like every other foal in the herd. However Miyuki knew much more about healing and magic. Xue Fang wondered why he had suddenly recalled the lessons from his boyhood. The memories brought back a longing for simpler days when all had been right in his word. He mourned the past but he couldn't live his life focusing all the time on the past. He had responsibilities, which he needed to deal with. A ladylike coughing grabbed his attention. He gazed around his eye going straight to the source of the noise right away. Only Miyuki would try to get his attention in such a fashion. She was the most ladylike of her sisters and she rarely acted in a fashion that was without manners. She was a fine healer and only in her healing did she raise her voice. Miyuki was fiercely protective of her patients and they had her loyalty for however long they were under her care.
Kukiko would never give a soft cough to gain his attention. She would just walk into his personal space and demand his attention. Kukiko had the alpha personality that required her to act in a certain way. She was high spirited and she was seldom bested at any type of physical activity. Kukiko also hated to lose and she could fight dirty. As the eldest she was fiercely protective of her younger sibling and the banishment of her youngest sister had hit her the hardest. Xue Fang knew that if any of the cousins ever challenged him for herd leadership it would be Kukiko. Though deep in his heart he knew she would never give that challenge as she knew it would split the herd and she feared losing her family the most. She loved him almost as much as she loved her sister and had always treated him as an elder brother. His birth herd had been unique in their approach to foal rearing. In his herd all the herd was responsible for a foals upbringing and education. Every older herd member was considered an Auntie or Uncle and every foal of the same generation was considered a cousin. However since all foals were communally raised every foal of the same generation had more of a brother sister relationship.
-531 words-  

[AislingJuno]

Well it seemed Miyuki was finally starting to receive some attention from Xue Fang. She coughed a little louder and his eyes finally narrowed in her direction. Now that she had his attention she struggled on how to convey her thoughts. She wanted to clearly lay out her argument but she felt like the emotions inside her had been bubbling up to her breaking point. She should have spoken up weeks ago but she had conflicted emotions. These past few weeks her thoughts had been in turmoil but she had remained silent waiting to see how the situation regarding Kaneq would play out. She had wanted Kukiko to realize the mistake she had made and remedy the problem herself. However Kukiko, seemed unwilling to acknowledge her faults. Miyuki loved her elder sister but it seemed like Miyuki often had act as her sister's conscious.
Miyuki looked at Xue Fang his face seemed to be pinched in concern as if he dreaded the words she was going to speak. "Leader, I must speak of a problem that involves members of the herd," Miyuki bowed her head. Since she was bringing up a herd issue the male in front of her would be treated with deep respect. Sometimes she could tease or joke with Xue Fang but that was because he was her cousin and they had been raised together. It might be the same soq but she treated Xue Fang differently at different times. He might love her as his cousin but he was also her herd leader. She treated him with extra respect when he wore his mantle as herd leader and when she had to bring up a problem from within the herd that needed his judgement.

"Why has nothing been done about Kaneq. He was taken against his will and kept captive here. I am worried about his physical and mental health, he is my patient and my priority. I will make sure his best interest is served while he is my patient. We are all to blame for not speaking up when Kukiko brought him here. We are not one of those barbaric herds that steal soq to be our mates. We are not Harpies but snow spirits the proud descendants of Yuki Onna's. We have a long lineage and many beautiful traditions. Our blood is of snow and Ice . We have lost so much I will not stand to see us fall so low. " Miyuki had tried to keep a civil tongue but the words just seemed to spill out of her mouth. She had kept silent out of split loyalty , torn between her sister and her duty as a healer. She had lost her temper and lashed out against her herd leader and that was inexcusable but she admitted to herself that she blamed him a bit for not stepping up and stopping her sister.
-480 words-  

[AislingJuno]

Kukiko's ear flattened and she trembled a bit inside. Miyuki seldom raised her voice and when she did she was quite fierce. Few things seemed to frazzle Miyuki. Kukiko thought of Miyuki as being patient like a great sage she was typically like a tranquil pool of peace and comfort. Kukiko rarely saw Miyuki upset and when she was it was seldom aimed at her. Kukiko felt a deep pain in her chest, she had hurt her sister enough to make Miyuki act out of character. Kukiko loved all her sisters but Miyuki was the second eldest of the group and she was Kukiko rock. As the eldest Kukiko, felt a great responsibility tp protect her younger sisters but Miyuki made her feel protected as if she didn't need to alwayls be guarded and alert for danger. Kukiko was deathly afraid that someday she would lose another sister. The banishment of her younger sister because of her betrayal of herd laws had severely impacted Kukiko mental state. Kukiko had done her duty and chased her sister off of her lands but it hurt her so much to uphold the task. It had been her responsibility and she had accepted the task from her herd leader. Kukiko hadn't wanted to admit she'd been in a fragile state, she was usually very strong willed. Some soq would even call her arrogant , but Kukiko had been raised by a family that admired strong outspoken females.
She didn't doubt herself or the decisions she made but this time Kukiko could admit she might have been wrong. The banishment of her sister was difficult to bear by itself but it also opened old wounds for Kukiko. She had been having nightmares, but the nightmares were of past events which made them even more scary. In her dreams she would see attack by the fire herd. In some of more constant dreams she would see her dead parents and in her dream she would run up to them and right before she would reach them they would become mist. Kukiko would often wake up feeling frustrated that she was never able to reach her parents in her dreams. The worst dreams however were the dreams of Yuki . They were not yet official mates but they had secretly pledged to be together. In her nightmares she would see him bloody and wounded his face grimacing in pain. In her dreams he would spot her and his face would brighten up even though he was dying. In the dreams Yuki would call her his fierce one just like he did while he was living. Kukiko's heart heart, it felt like her soul was broken and all that existed was a shadow of what she once was. She thought she was starting to heal but some old wounds were hard to heal.


--words 473--  

[AislingJuno]

Kaneq's eyes widened in surprise at Miyuki's words. He had never seen the herds healer so fluttered or outspoken. She was always the calmest, most mild mannered of the sisters. Every time he had talked to her, he had felt like he was talking to a great sage. Miyuki just emitted a calming energy that could be quite hypnotizing and addicting. She just made everyone around her feel like they were safe. Her voice and energy could make any soq or fam feel relaxed and calm. Kaneq knew that all the herds fams were in love with Miyuki, when they weren't with their bonded soq they would often follow Miyuki. When they didn't think anybody was looking they would often lick her legs and put their nose against her coat because even her smell seemed to relax them. Miyuki was an easy soq to like but he would never have romantic feeling for her. It was clear that Miyuki's taste ran to the feminine side. Still he could find her beautiful , like a mountain or sunset was beautiful. It wasn't that she was just physically stunning but more attractive was her inner character that radiated out . Her soul was very beautiful and he hoped the mare who captured Miyuki's heart realized how lucky she was.

Kaneq was glad Miyuki had spoken up for him. It had been so long since another soq had cared for him. Still he wasn't wasting away as she seemed to think. Kaneq was realizing the cold atmosphere in the eastern mountains was actually making him stronger. He felt more physically strong and much more energetic then he had ever been. Being surrounded by other soq that treated him like part of their family brought joy to his heart. However his relationship with Kukiko was still strained. Kukiko had forced him to come into the eastern mountains but since she had delivered him into the bosom of her family she had wanted little to do with him. She seldom talked to him and when their eyes met she would hurriedly look away as if burdened by his presence.

Kaneq was curious to see what Kukiko reaction would be to his sisters words. He turned his head towards her direction and for a second he wished he hadn't. She stood very still her face very white except for the black circles under her eyes. Her eyes were wide with shock and she appeared very young a fragile. Like a violet gust of wind could easily tip her over and shatter her into pieces. Kaneq could admit to himself that one some level he didn't like Kukiko because while he loved it in the eastern mountains he resented her for not giving him the choice. However he didn't like seeing Kukiko who normally looked so fierce instead look so breakable. He felt sorry for her and he felt a sudden need to protect her .

-words 486-  

[AislingJuno]

After Miyuki's outburst Xue Fang carefully watched all the nearby herd members. His cousins all seemed to have mixed emotions and he gazed at each of the girls . He looked deep into their eyes like he could gauge the depths of their emotions. Finally he turned his eyes to kaneq , a new herd member but one he had slowly grown fond of. He looked at Kukiko who's usual strength had fled and who now appeared very pale. For far to long he let his pity towards her cloud his judgement as herd leader. He needed to let his emotional attachments fade and make a sound as the leader of his herd. Sometimes he did not like being herd leader as it meant that he needed to push his wants and desires back and focus on the herd rather then his own self interests. He would like to treat Kukiko like a beloved family member but he was not just her cousin he was her herd leader. He needed to head Miyuki's words and make sure Kaneq best interest were served even if it meant that kaneq would leave the herd. He would give kaneq back his freedom and he felt ashamed that he hadn't interfered sooner. Kaneq's well being was important and Miyuki must have also been suffering before she spoke to him. He had not purposely ignored the issue of kaneq coming to the herd . However he had turned his eye away from Kaneq's suffering and that was inexcusable. He was still relatively new to being a herd leader and he had a lot of growing to do. In the future he hoped he would would become more reasonable and better at juggling the difference between his mantle of herd leader and family member.  

[AislingJuno]

Kaneq stepped forward, instantly he could feel all eyes focused on him. "This problem is because I was brought here against my will. It is true that I did not come here willingly but maybe I was meant to be here. I was loath to leave my companion but I have to admit that I was more of a pet in her eyes. Her sanity was a times questionable but I was lonely and her wings reminded me of my family. All my blood relatives have passed on so I was so lonely and being around her filled a void inside of me. I felt like I needed to protect Zenobia and in protecting her I gained some sense of purpose. I don't think she felt much sadness when I was taken but she probably felt a sense of frustration since she has never liked losing anything she perceived as hers. Kukiko did force me to come up to the eastern mountains but I now feel much more healthy both physically and mentally. It seems my blood feels a connection to snow and Ice. My blood thrums with power in this landscape and it has been slowly healing from the damage that was inflected by being separated from it's place of power. My grandmother was born in a snow spirit tribe but she moved away from her birthplace because the stallion she loved could not tolerate the snow. After he died she stayed to watch over her family and to take care of me after my parents died. She most have known that being separated from an icy place was not good for her physical and emotional health. Snow spirits cannot handle heat and the summers were always hard on her. She always tried her best to hide her pain but I remember seeing her grimacing in pain when she thought I wasn't watching her. I wish she would have talked to me about her past and her snow spirit blood. After my parents death I wish we had moved to a place with ice and snow. I think she thought my bloodline was too diluted and I would weaken in the cold. How I wish we had taken the chance and moved. Instead I watched my grandmother fade away season until she died to early. The strain of the heat was to hard on her and I also believed that the death of both her mate and her daughter weighed hard on her. She lasted long enough to teach me the skills I would need to survive on my own but how I miss her. She would have been so happy to be here living among this herd. If she had lived here I know she would have lived longer and been much more happy.