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 Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2022 8:52 pm
The sight of Ishtar leaving the party with another vampire sent a stab of pain through Shamhat's cold, dead heart. It was not unlike Ishtar to flaunt her conquests before her, but the enraptured appearance of the other, the way she'd slid so easily into Ishtar's arms made Shamhat think of other things, other places, other times. A time when she, too, had been captivated by the seeming goddess. A lump built in her throat and she tried to swallow around it, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. ... Remembering that she didn't breathe. Only Ishtar made her forget.
Made her remember what it had been like to have a heart that beat only for her. Remember the warmth, the happy days, the times that time itself forgot. A knife twisted in her chest, and it was then all she could do to gracefully disentangle herself from her current companions. To make the walk out the door look purposeful. Not like she was fleeing anything or anyone. Even if the thing she was fleeing was a memory. The vampire who no doubt would soon be in another's arms was not what she'd fallen in love with those many, many years ago, surely.
Oh, to be young again. To be innocent once more. To know love as she'd known it, so purely, so joyfully. To have the naivete all over again, that she might believe Ishtar truly loved her. But as her dead heart sank in her chest, and she made the trek back to her dwelling, she was oblivious to the stares that followed her. She was a Daeva through and through, powerful beyond what young vampires might know, and certainly beyond the mere mortals whose eyes glided over her.
At last she was home, but as soon as she got there, a bottle of wine was in her hand. The more she drank, the more she missed Ishtar, and the more she hated not only herself but also Ishtar for it. Her imagination, always so potent, was particularly powerful with wine in her belly. She drank, and drank, trying to wash away the memory of what she'd seen... but she could not. Emboldened by the wine, nerves dulled only ever so slightly by it, it suddenly seemed a very good idea to confront her sire and the lover she'd taken to her bed. Yes, why not?
As a vampire she was not weak to alcohol to the degree a mortal might be, but she was still holding the latest bottle when she made her way to Ishtar's home, and burst inside. Wearing her nightgown and little else, hair wild and free, she glared around the room, seeking any trace of her former lover. But she couldn't find her. Well... the bedroom was further in. The antediluvian sauntered, slightly swaying, toward the bedroom... and found Ishtar on the way. But it suddenly occurred to her, upon the sight of her so-called enemy, that Ishtar was alone. Why?
"Ish?"
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Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2022 9:22 pm
Her mind was swirling. From the moment she had seen Shamhat at that party it was like the world was off its axis and Ishtar was falling. Not that she could ever show that to anyone. From the outside to the casual observer she would have seemed composed as she lead Artemis out into the night suggestively. She saw the other woman home before making her way back to her own private room. At least, she assumed all of that happened. She had no recollection of any of the specifics, only that she found herself in her room alone. She stood still as death in the darkness for many moments before she burst into action. She tore the decorations off the walls and threw her clothing all over the room. She smashed her dresser and tossed her bed against the far wall. She collapsed in a pile of clothes on the floor next to the wine fridge she kept in her room. She opened it and grabbed the first bottle she saw and downed it, tossing the empty to the side before grabbing another and another. The amount she would need to get truly drunk was staggering, verging on dangerous, but she was willing to chase that rabbit. Tears welled up unbidden and sent her makeup streaming down her face in black rivulets. She didn't understand why she felt this way. It had been so long since she had even seen Shamhat, why would it matter that she was there?
Somehow Shamhat brought everything back. She saw her as the mortal she'd been when they met, standing before her with worshipping eyes. It was wrong to embrace her. Ishtar knew it in what remained of her soul and yet she had done it anyway. She had wanted Shamhat by her side forever. She had destroyed her. The look in Shamhat's eyes when she realized Ishtar was no goddess but a demon haunts the vampire to this day. The look of betrayal cut her to her core. She had made Shamhat hate her and her soul burned for it. After all this time she still wanted what she'd wanted back then. She wanted Shamhat.
As if summoned the other vampire stood before Ishtar suddenly. She blinked up at her from the floor as she said her name. Ish. No one dared call her Ish. None but Shamhat. It sent a shiver down her spine.
"Shamhat? Why are you here?"
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Posted: Sun Dec 04, 2022 10:34 pm
Standing stock still, Shamhat stared at Ishtar as though she could not believe her eyes. In truth... she could not. She had been so sure that Ishtar had left with the other vampire. So sure. Yet here Ishtar was, so clearly not with Artemis... and more than that, she had wrecked her room. It was a gods forsaken mess. This behavior, however, was quite familiar. Unlike her present state, the state of the room Shamhat knew all too well.
Baffled, the antedliluvian stared at her Disciple with eyes full of pain and uncertainty. "Why are you here?" Ishtar had left with company. Why, then, had she found her all alone? In another time, she would have picked up the strewn belongings. She had spent so much time sweeping the apparent goddess's temple. Back then, she had loved her with her entire being. Even now... she was confused, not sure of just what she was feeling. Was it, indeed, hatred?
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 1:19 pm
Ishtar stared up at Shamhat for a moment, digesting her words. Then she broke into an unhinged laugh - something between sadness and happiness, tears streaming down her face once more. "Why am I here?" She croaked out. She took a breath and calmed herself. "Were you not expecting to find me in my own room?" She pushed herself up off the floor with a bottle of wine in her hand, her robe barely clinging to her. She walked over to an upended chair which righted and then grabbed another and placed it across from the other and then sank into it, gesturing for Shamhat to sit opposite her. She tilted her head back and downed the rest of the bottle. She wished she was drunk. She wiped at her face, trying to clear the makeup streaks from her cheeks. She fiddled with her robe, trying to get it to lay nicely. Then she patted down her hair, attempting to put it into some sort of order. She wished she hadn't destroyed the room. Had she known Shamhat would come she would have made sure to have everything in order. She'd have had a simple but elegant meal spread out with wine for them to share. At least she had the wine. She chuckled to herself. She hated that she didn't have a mask to hide behind while being confronted by her former lover. Her chest felt tight, but she crossed her legs seductively, putting on a confident façade as she faced her Antedliluvian. "Why have you sought me out?"
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 3:21 pm
"I thought you'd have company," Shamhat said, her tone thin and flat. She dug her nails into her palms, faced with an Ishtar who was clearly not drunk. Which meant that the wanton destruction had been done while entirely sober. Which meant... what? Had the other vampire rejected her? As much as that would have given Shamhat some amount of pleasure, however shallow, she could not believe that. "You... went home alone." Why was she here? In her nightgown, no less.
Hair loose so that it trailed on the floor. Why, oh why, had she thought this was a good idea? Evidently either Ishtar was just that much more powerful or the wine Shamhat had had was stronger than whatever was on this table. Shamhat sat down, instinctively mirroring Ishtar, as she had done for such a very long time. Long enough to make it muscle memory. Opposite and yet exactly the same, in so many ways. She didn't entirely explain herself... but it didn't need an explanation, at this point.
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 7:25 pm
She was slowly regaining her composure, though she began realizing her mind was a bit befuddled. Perhaps the wine had finally hit. She casually dropped the empty bottle to the floor and tried to sit up a little straighter. Of course, she'd made such a show of leaving with Artemis... of course that was why Shamhat was here. Why hadn't she expected that? How many times have they done this dance? Though this time was different, as Shamhat was pointing out. Ishtar hadn't brought Artemis home with her. She was still trying to figure why she hadn't herself. Something was different. Had she matured? Was that possible? She snorted to herself softly.
Then she began to really take in the other vampire. Nightclothes, hair wild, the scent of wine lingering about her as well. "Were you hoping to come cause a scene if I had a lover here? And what right would you have had for that. You have been asleep a long time." There was a hint of loneliness to her voice that she tried to hide by clearing her throat. "Why wouldn't I have moved on." She couldn't meet Shamhat's eyes so instead busied herself by getting up and searching for a couple of wine glasses and any wine left in her wine fridge. There was a few bottles, which she pretended to choose between while she tried to gather her wits, though they seemed to be fading away as she began to feel the buzz finally. What shitty timing. She turned to face Shamhat and held up the glasses, her eyebrow arched in question.
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 8:21 pm
And then Ishtar reached into her chest and wrenched out her heart. Every word hit the vampire with a force that the other could scarcely have intended. She'd had too much to drink. Unaware that every emotion flickered across her face as Ishtar continued onward, Shamhat stared at her former lover. A rebel tear tracked its way down her cheek, and fell unnoticed to her shoulder. Indeed. What right did she have to be here?
The naked pain disappeared into a mask that she'd so carefully cultivated over the years. Wordlessly, she took the glass and held it up, waiting for Ishtar to fill it. "I don't know what my intentions were. I was already here before I realized where I was going." Funny, given she hadn't even known where Ishtar lived... but she didn't need to know.
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 8:40 pm
She saw the flicker of pain across the other vampire's face before it disappeared into a mask once more and it drove a stake through Ishtar's heart. She hated the pain she caused her former lover. Over and over again she hurt her. Could she ever get over the guilt? Could she ever forgive herself? Had she really ever tried? She felt like she'd spent all of Shamhat's slumber in a hedonistic haze rather than in self reflection and with her reappearance into Ishtar's life she was feeling insecure. She didn't want to feel that way anymore. She needed to get herself together but the room was so dark and fuzzy. Damn the wine. She poured a generous portion of wine into Shamhat's glass and then her own. She swirled it idly before sipping it. "I'm sorry," she whispered softly. "For the pretense earlier. I may have taken the other vampire to bed if you hadn't shown up but when I saw you..." She paused and took a sip of wine. "I guess I lost any desire for anyone else. You still are the most striking woman I have ever seen."
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Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2022 9:06 pm
The wine sat unsipped in Shamhat's glass as she listened to Ishtar's explanation, the words of an apology ringing in her ears. She could scarcely believe she was hearing an apology for anything. The words 'I'm sorry' didn't come easily for either of them. Her world was so much different from Ishtar's. In her world, no one else existed to take home in the first place. Although she had hated her ex-lover for the longest time, hatred had not blotted out Ishtar's image, nor the memory of the love they had shared.
It had only made it that much more painful. Beautiful and sorrowful, the vampire listened with ears that did not want to hear. "The stake through my heart that put me to bed could not keep me there... but watching you with her..." No, she didn't want to say it. Though she had been lost in torpor for so long, the feelings were just as fresh as when they had first started. She had not forgotten. Could not forget. The pain, the love, the ache, the grief. All of it. It went on and on, unending, back to the very first moment she had realized what Ishtar was... and what she had become.
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Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2022 7:34 pm
She could scarcely look directly at Shamhat. The Antedilluvian stood before her finally after all of these years and here was Ishtar sloppy, drunk, and amongst the wreckage of her room - an all-too-familiar sight for the both of them, she knew. Her head swirled and her eyes blurred in and out slightly but she was determined to hold onto her wits. Perhaps she should have taken it easier on the bottles of wine. Her heart was throbbing from the regret of the entirety of the evening and her mind was abuzz with ideas of how to fix this mess, how could she make it up to Shamhat? She couldn't even begin to think that through before Shamhat's words cut through all of the wine and pain and confusion and fear and dove right into her heart. She was out of her seat in a blink, the glass in her hand falling to the floor as she appeared in front of Shamhat, so close she could smell the familiar perfume clinging to the other vampire. "A stake?" she hissed, rage dissolving any buzz she had and bringing her eyes into sharp focus. "Who staked you," she said too calmly, her eyes wild and fists clenched. She had always assumed Shamhat had gone to torpor voluntarily. She thought her Antedilluvian had abandoned her on purpose. Now the thought that someone had harmed her and Ishtar hadn't known, hadn't done anything about it... She couldn't stand the thought.
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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2022 10:08 pm
A flicker of surprise crossed Shamhat's face, as she realized that Ishtar had not known what had happened to her so many years ago. "You didn't know," she said, her tone oddly flat, some unnamable feeling showing in only her eyes, the slight tilt of her head. "It was Omarosa. She said..." That pain dared to show its face momentarily, and she shoved it down, "That you had chosen her. That I was only in the way of your love. She implied that you knew. That you actually condoned it."
That she had... in her way, wanted it. "I had been asleep, and woke up to find her crouched over me, her hand flashed too quickly. But the pain I will never forget." Omarosa had told her that Ishtar was hers, that they were happy, and this one 'small' change would ensure their happiness. Clearly Omarosa had been lying, but the way Shamhat's heart had broken in that moment surely had not helped her to recover from the trauma of the wound. "The night of the party was my first night out of torpor. I had been awake for minutes when I followed your scent." Only to find Ishtar wrapped in another's arms.
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Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2023 5:58 pm
"Omarosa..." It was a hiss more than a word uttered. Her eyes narrowed as her focus became a pinprick. She remembered the day Shamhat had gone to Torpor well. The two of them weren't on the best of terms, so when she was told Shamhat had begun her slumber, Ishtar took it to mean she wanted a break from her. Now that she thought about it, Omarosa had been the one to tell her. Rage began filling her body from the tips of her toes to the top of her head and all she could see was red. "Where is she" she hissed, moving impossibly fast around the room looking for some sort of weapon. Not that she needed one to kill the other vampire, but she enjoyed the poetic justice of staking her for her betrayal - if she could find something that could serve as a stake before her patience for the task ran out.
She stopped long enough to eye the bedframe and then in a blink she was smashing it and selecting a sharp piece. "I will find her," she growled, stalking out of the room with her makeshift stake in hand.
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Posted: Mon Jan 02, 2023 12:53 pm
It happened so fast. The moment Omarosa's name left Ishtar's lips a chill went through Shamhat. The Disciple raged about the room, seemingly searching for something. When she took hold of the bedframe, Shamhat knew exactly what it was. It was as though she'd been submerged in ice water. She didn't know what to think or say, when Ishtar's immediate response to her confession was to seek vengeance upon the Disciple's former lover. "I don't know where she is," she said to an empty room, and then, legs weak, she sat abruptly down. Dazedly, she wondered what would come of this.
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Posted: Mon Jan 02, 2023 10:42 pm
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