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 Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 5:58 pm
Well, here goes nothing...
The Darkness
The darkness
It burns
But the light
It burns more
And so I am tempted
To go through the door
To the darkness
And nothing more
I wrote this a couple of years ago, so it might suck crap... I'm sorry if it does
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Posted: Fri Jun 02, 2006 1:43 pm
No no, I don't think it's bad at all. Slightly twee, but it's really very powerful in its own way. I would suggest giving it another title, The Darkness just does not fit, it seems too plain. How about "Never End" or "Just a Thought" or even "Nothing More"?
Great poem heart
Jaikai
xx
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Posted: Thu Jun 08, 2006 10:41 am
Short and sweet, just the way I like it.
Maybe because I can never acheive that myself.
Well, it's named very much in the style of Emily Dickonson. And speaking of her style, except for the sake of impact, you don't even have to name it at all, so whatever feel right.
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Posted: Wed Jun 14, 2006 12:11 am
ooh... thanks for the positive feedback...
I've had one person say that it's the best, and another person say that it totally sucked crap, so I was a little insecure... but thanks a lot!
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Posted: Thu Jun 29, 2006 10:56 am
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![[yin~yang]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/56/37/3daae2a6333756_flip.png?t=1249526290_6.00_11)
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