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 Posted: Fri Feb 02, 2007 8:08 am
There was once a dream I had
About a girl
A girl with dreams and hopes
As soft and delicate as butterfly's wings
But once a strong wind blew
Her fickle dreams fled
And other peoples dreams for her replaced them
Now she lives other peoples dreams
I'm still waiting to wake-up
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Posted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 2:14 pm
I like this, but I think it can be expanded upon a bit more. Maybe add a few more lines and describe what happens a bit better?
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Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 12:02 pm
Meh. It was just something I threw together for a major assignment in Creative Writing. I don't know what to add to it really.
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Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 12:25 pm
I think it's fine as it is. Most poems do not have a clear meaning, and sometimes it's better to let others interpret it in different ways to see what they believe it's talking about.
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Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 8:30 am
Well for your amusement here's a longer version.
I once had a dream about a girl
And in this dream
the girl had dreams of her own
As real as anyone else's
They were soft and delicate
Like the wings of a butterfly
That if you so much as reach out and grab them feriously you'd cripple the fragile dreams
But if you held it softly,
they'd rest with you for just a fleeting moment
Then a strong wind blew and her fickle dreams fled.
Only to be replaced with other peoples hopes and dreams for her
And in my dreams
She dutifull fulfills everyone else's dreams
without a flicker of an eyelash
I'm still waiting to wake up.
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Reply
