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 Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2007 6:35 pm
By K.M.
~Broken and Damned~
Some say I'm broken
Others say I'm damned
I know that I could do it
If you'd only say I can
When people put me down
but rais my spirits first
It hits me harder then it would
If you had told me that I'm cursed
Please don't try to fix me
with those loving hands
I now that Im not worth it
because I'm broken and I'm damned.
So, tell me what you think. be honest, I can take it. If you think it sucked then say so.
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Posted: Tue Feb 20, 2007 3:45 pm
It's a good idea, just build like hell off of it!
It's a great beginning, it just needs one hell of a workout.
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Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 5:41 pm
I have about two more pages of it, but they need a little bit of editing. But thank you for your advise!
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Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 2:38 pm
I agree with demented pandora. It does have a great beginning and Its actually a good read. I am not too fond of poems that rhyme because it normally obscures the essence that is a poem, but you did very well. My hat is off to you. mrgreen
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