twilite_eclipse
Deary Diary,
2 things keep running on my head ngaun.. first, may kwenta/mahalaga ba ako? two, lahat ba ng mga pinaggagawa ko may silbe ba? napapansin? napupulaan? or sumusobra na.
Everytime i do something at pag natapos ko na, andiyan na ung takot ko na baka walang silbe, or simple as "what the hell"
i hate drama pero napakadrama ng buhay ko kaya ayoko talaga ng moment sa gabi at di nakakatulog, it kills the hell out of me. i was watching spiderman last time and i remember pinost ko yon dito ung famous line ni green goblin "inspite of everything you've done for them..eventually they will still hate you"
well i don't wanna use the word hate..coz i know so far wala naman nasusuklam saken..asar siguro dahil mahirap ako basahin, kung minsan wala sa mood. Sabi ng astrology sign ko (scorpion), scorpions like to win, persevere, aims success.
Buong buhay ko ito lagi ginagawa ko, achieve my goals, be a good daughter, responsible, independent, hardworking. Pero bakit pakiramdam ko kulang pa din. Then kanina naglakad ako sa playground i saw couples playing with their daughter sa see-saw.. it slightly pinched my heart (nainggit) but then napawi din ng ngiti dahil na realize ko, i'm just a woman who craves for Love.
i took down my co-nurses advice.."don't rush it dear your only 23, get out of that room and turn off that laptop, then go outside, feel the breeze and SEE THE WORLD..." then na picture out ko ung batang pasyente na namatay sa clinic a month ago. everytime na babasahan ko siya ng book or play with her she keeps pointing her index finger outside the window and basically pointing the tree tapos sasabihin niya saken "nurse len, look tree"
napaluha ako pero luhang may lakip na ngiti sa puso at pakiramdam. Narealize ko kasi all my life pala i've been such a LONELY FOOL, masyado ko na palang tinago sarili ko sa madilim na kwarto.
RIP Samantha (i miss u kiddo)..goodnight IWCians
-twi-twi-
2 things keep running on my head ngaun.. first, may kwenta/mahalaga ba ako? two, lahat ba ng mga pinaggagawa ko may silbe ba? napapansin? napupulaan? or sumusobra na.
Everytime i do something at pag natapos ko na, andiyan na ung takot ko na baka walang silbe, or simple as "what the hell"
i hate drama pero napakadrama ng buhay ko kaya ayoko talaga ng moment sa gabi at di nakakatulog, it kills the hell out of me. i was watching spiderman last time and i remember pinost ko yon dito ung famous line ni green goblin "inspite of everything you've done for them..eventually they will still hate you"
well i don't wanna use the word hate..coz i know so far wala naman nasusuklam saken..asar siguro dahil mahirap ako basahin, kung minsan wala sa mood. Sabi ng astrology sign ko (scorpion), scorpions like to win, persevere, aims success.
Buong buhay ko ito lagi ginagawa ko, achieve my goals, be a good daughter, responsible, independent, hardworking. Pero bakit pakiramdam ko kulang pa din. Then kanina naglakad ako sa playground i saw couples playing with their daughter sa see-saw.. it slightly pinched my heart (nainggit) but then napawi din ng ngiti dahil na realize ko, i'm just a woman who craves for Love.
i took down my co-nurses advice.."don't rush it dear your only 23, get out of that room and turn off that laptop, then go outside, feel the breeze and SEE THE WORLD..." then na picture out ko ung batang pasyente na namatay sa clinic a month ago. everytime na babasahan ko siya ng book or play with her she keeps pointing her index finger outside the window and basically pointing the tree tapos sasabihin niya saken "nurse len, look tree"
napaluha ako pero luhang may lakip na ngiti sa puso at pakiramdam. Narealize ko kasi all my life pala i've been such a LONELY FOOL, masyado ko na palang tinago sarili ko sa madilim na kwarto.
RIP Samantha (i miss u kiddo)..goodnight IWCians
-twi-twi-
