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“What’s the point?” Sonora set her wand down and sank to her knees, leaving the target she’d drawn on the wall without a sparring partner.

She wrapped her arms around her shoulders and stared at her notes again--spells, strategies. Why did it matter how much she practiced if she couldn’t actually hold her own--if she couldn’t do anything in an actual fight? All the stories about breaking curses on secret houses in the woods, in crypts and underground--and she couldn’t fend off a single werewolf? Sonora stared at her notes for dueling club--spells, strategies-- but in front of the wolf…she’d panicked in the face of the wolf. What was the point of practicing for a fight if everything went out the window when she actually needed it?

Trees. Woods. Banter.
Wolf. Blood. Screams.
Lumos. Stupefy. Waddiwasi.

Everte Statum. Basic dueling spell. Would have been super useful at any point in that encounter. She hadn’t even remembered it. Even Rictusempra or Tarantallegra might have done something. She and Ves had practiced those extensively, to many giggles. Didn’t matter. Why hadn’t she tried the Aguamenti-Glacius set? Wundus Healiom. Thank goodness Jonah had remembered that spell. She certainly hadn’t. She’d just stared at all the blood and started sputtering incoherently once Ms. Vasilisa had given them opportunity to run.

Sona had cast probably five spells that night, but barely one of them did anything. She was alive because Jonah had knocked Mr. Lock away—wandless! They’d gotten away because Ms. Vasilisa had saved them. She supposedly had two years of dueling under her belt, but if she couldn’t land a hit, nothing would matter.

Sonora wiped her tears away. This kind of thinking wasn’t helping. She’d been down this train of thought before. There was nothing she could have done about the wolf pouncing on Rion. But Jonah--he’d only gotten so hurt because she hadn’t been able to do anything but panic and stare in the face of danger. She simply had to be be more familiar with her spells. Know how to use them. Aim them accurately. Ready to use them. If it ever happened again--It won’t happen again. Because next time I'll be ready.

Waddiwasi was probably the only thing she’d done effectively that battle. Made sense. She used it on a near-daily basis, as much as she used fervens aeris to dry her hair. Practice. It had worked because she had been practiced with it. She was familiar with how it worked, how it played into other spells, how to control it precisely. Last year she had focused on practicing and mastering her spells so she would know how they worked in any given situation. This year it was time to stop waiting for the best situation set itself up and start setting them up for herself.

Was it enough? Waddawasi-Fallomeles hadn’t worked. She had thought through the transfiguration through more thoroughly afterwards. Panic made for poor concentration. A rock was probably insufficient material for a badger transfiguration. Maybe the log would have worked. But Waddiwasi wasn’t as effective on large objects. Depulso--Fallomeles. Waddiwasi-Fallorodenta. Even Wingardium Leviosa could work in a pinch. Engorgio. There. Now she could do this anywhere, so long as she kept a charm or something with her. This was exactly the problem-- She had taken too long to strategize. It was the same reason she still couldn’t beat Cassidy, and it was the same reason she’s just stared at Lock that night. If she had a reliable set of spells that she knew how to string together-- a flexible strategy going in as it were...maybe it could have at least shaved off a few seconds of her inaction.

Sonora pulled her wand to her and held it close, focusing on something happier: The night after the werewolf, curled up next to Jonah. She’d whispered reassurance that Rion was okay, Jonah joked that the neighbor’s cat had scratched him up much worse. And Rion was okay. Changed, but...alive. That was...okay, right? Presently, her wand let out a little glimmer of light and warmth, as though in comfort. She smiled a little. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like to lose her wand that night as well. At least she still had her wand. At least Rion had come out alive. Thank heavens Jonah had been there.

Another shimmer redirected her attention and she shook off the spiraling thoughts like they were a coat of dust that had been hanging over her. This was a lucky weekend without too much homework or studying yet. She had to practice while she could. Sonora forced herself to her feet, took a deep breath and straightened her stance. Wand, at the ready. Deep breath, steady arm. “Waddiwasi. Engorgio. Fallo--.”

The teacup crashed into the wall target, still small. ”Reparo. Accio teacup.”

She barely snagged the teacup before it hit her, but at least she was getting Accio practice as well. Once again. ”Waddiwasi. Engorgio. Fallomeles.”

At first it was just practice, but after a few hours, Sonora was distracted. The pervading sense of hurt and loneliness was back, seeping into the grim determination of practice. She didn’t understand it. Usually this would be a thing to bring to Jonah about. But after the train and opening feast, Jonah seemed to be back to short replies. As long as he was happy though, then she could bear with it—and Iggy was doing that marvelously. She’d hoped that she would at least be privy to the gossip of knowing who her best friend liked before they were together or some cute details about their relationship, but...well, maybe she had just been oblivious and a sucky friend last year and she was paying for that this year.

Vinny has Aeryn now. Jonah and Iggy have each other, Ves has “other friends”, August has homework and writing. Kam? Kam seemed upset lately. But maybe he wouldn’t mind if they were upset together? It wouldn’t hurt to ask! If nothing else, it would distract her for a while as she focused on finding him. And she could ask what he was doing in Alchemy!

No. If she had time to be asking about Alchemy, then she had time to practice for a class she was actually in. With a long sigh, Sona set her things back around the desk. Later then.

Sonora took a few deep breaths, imagined a sunny day nestled in her hammock. A blanket, a novel, J--Focus. She practiced transfiguring the chair into a goose a few times before before returning to mid-flight transfigurations. ”Waddiwasi. Engorgio. Fa--.”

She sighed again, staring frustratedly at the giant broken teacup. Before she could repair it, the door opened.

“Kam!” Sonora lit up--a little tiredly, and then with renewed effort. He had caught on anyways and when he asked if she was okay, she resigned herself to a sad smile. Had she missed dinner? Sona blinked at him. She hadn’t been hungry? But now that she thought about it, food sounded incredible.”Now that you mention it...yes?” She repaired and shrunk the teacup, then started packing her bag up for the night, wondering how much time was left before curfew. Maybe the first year foodie would have a fruit still?

But if she went back to the Ravenclaw dorms she'd just be reminded of late night study sessions that used to-- She cut her thinking off, her voice small. “Kam? Please hang out with me? I’ve been sad and happy at the same time, can’t figure it out, and studying or practicing aren’t working anymore.”

Sona hadn’t thought of heading to the kitchen for food--did they have hours of operation? She’d only been down there to get food for the occasional picnic. But Kam would know better so she nodded-- dessert sounded incredible.

Kam wrapped her in a hug when she asked to hang out with and she returned the hug, grateful for the company. He seemed to immediately understand her feelings and offered to talk all night. Hopefully she didn’t actually need all night, but it was really touching to know he was willing to if it came down to it. ”Thank you.” He offered to hang out after classes the next day and it took Sona a moment to remember that Kam had classes on Monday morning. ”After class would be wonderful,” Sona agreed, brightening in anticipation. She squeezed Kam tight for a moment before pulling away to grab her things.

Slinging her bag over her shoulder and tucking her wand away, Sonora nodded to head out. Kam soon asked what had happened, even pinpointing when things had started. The werewolf attack--well, Sona felt it wasn’t her story to tell to anyone outside of family. It was probably also why Vespera felt more distant this year. Evidently there was no getting things by Kam though. At least he had asked what the matter was, not what had happened. That much she could answer: ”I’ve been very distracted lately,” she replied honestly after a moment to consider. ”One moment I’m cheerful and happy and everything seems perfect, and then the next I’m sad and lonely and...it hurts. I'm usually okay being alone, but now it just feels...bad. It's better when there’re people around, but sometimes they’re right there and it still feels like we’re further than ever.

Somewhere in that thought she'd trailed off from people in general to specific friends, but Sona hardly made the distinction--her friends and family were basically her world. "That. Feeling so far away even though they're right there. That hurts. Everyone’s going through things and I don’t know what to do.” She paused. ”It makes me feel helpless in a different way. Not just at dueling, but helpless still.

"And half of it’s just being frustrated with classes again,” Sona mused. She probably shouldn’t be complaining about classes to Kam who was now doing more--no no, that just meant he’d best understand, right? ”I dropped what feels like half my classes from last year but it just feels like what’s still there got a bunch harder this year.”

There. She’d gotten that far on her own during her morning walks--at least she was actually doing those this year. Usually they were enough to figure out what was going on, how she was feeling, and make a plan to do something about it. But evidently holing up to study and practice wasn't the answer.

“Perfect,” Sona replied when Kam mentioned the corner of the study area that she was starting to think of as “her” corner. Instead of home though, it made her miss the days of curled up on the couch in the Ravenclaw Common Room. Or even outside in the Clocktower Courtyard or with a hammock strung up somewhere. But the study area is easier for study parties, she reminded herself, and that was the end of that.

She listened quietly as Kam validated her feelings, nodding along and grateful he was so understanding. She paused, going back to when he said it was like being invisible. She had thought it felt more like a canyon of fog, obscuring the bridge between people-- not being able to see each other maybe, being further in distance from each other, but at least the bridge was still there. Being invisible to the world--for them to just not be there, that… probably felt worse, she suspected. But it also fundamentally worked. Maybe that was why Jonah hadn’t talked to her properly-- maybe he was used to her not seeing him. She was so used to him just knowing how to cheer her up that...maybe she had to speak up clearly. If anything, it directly confronted the invisibility-- Invisible things making noise could definitely be detected.

Sona reached out to squeeze Kam’s shoulder a little, partially for her own comfort, partially because he seemed...to feel what he was saying deeply. ”The invisibility…. Maybe...we just have to speak up clearly... Or do what Peeves does and block the entire hall with something so it’s impossible for them to not see us?” she whispered quietly. ”And you’re right. If we’re alone together, then that’s not really alone, is it?” she said with a small smile. A few lines later, Sona nodded again, agreeing fervently. So many classes that it made her head spin was a perfect way to think of year three. And Kam was still facing that. But he was right--classes were an excellent distraction.

”I’m fairly sure people can only compare you on appearance, and now not even that,” she murmured quietly when Kam brought up being compared to Iggy. She was still a little disappointed in herself for not being able to tell the twins apart last year, but as a matter of principle, she had let it go after the Magizoology Festival. The important thing was helping them reconcile, or helping them feel better. She’d thought they seemed pretty friendly at the Festival, but...well, evidently Sona didn’t have much to say about her observational skills over the last few year.

She shifted the focus to next steps and analysis. It seemed like the invisibility, as Kam put it, was the problem feeling for both of them. There was the distraction element--which she realized that just because she’d dropped her classes didn’t mean she couldn’t do a deeper dive on her existing projects. ”Okay. Then my distraction will be transfiguration. I’m going to figure out transfiguration for dueling purposes and then study Animagus theory.” Or look up cursebreaking books! If she started studying where the crypts and castles were now, she’d be better prepared when she graduated right?

▬▬ Make your life a masterpiece; ▬▬

Aldrick looked up as Lizzie and the two first years came in, he wondered why Brook wasn't with them, but realized she was probably eating somewhere and didn't want to see her older brother. When Lizzie mentioned how proud August would be Aldrick sighed, "If it wasn't for that t**t, I wouldn't HAVE to study. He brings up points that are mentioned in the reference notes of the text books! If I want a shot of beating him, I have to know my stuff. The guy should have been a Ravenclaw."

Aldrick smiled at Rhea when she successfully transformed the gerbil, he remembered her struggling with magic, and even being afraid of magic. She had definately come a long ways. A small bit of pride rose in him, he was so proud of what she had accomplished this year, she would be a fine witch yet, potentially one of the best there were. Aidene asked if August was going to show up and Aldrick laughed, "August is probably studying next year's work already prepared for the exams. He won't be here. I feel if you girls are anything like Elizabeth here was her first year, you'll probably be needing lessons in the practical portion of classes. I trust you can read your notes on your own to get through the written portions."

Aldrick waved his wand in an arc when Aidene cast the teacup toward him with her spell, "depulso." The tea cup went flying away from him, and smashed against the wall. Too bad, no more tea in that cup.... or maybe a new learning lesson.

"I think we best start with charms, that's what you need help with, right Rhea? Lesson one: Never cast a charm at an object ,for it to then go flying toward another person. Unless you're dueling. In which case, throw as many objects as you like." He was glad at least it wasn't a gerbil that was flying around the room, but these girls needed to be careful with things they were casting at others. Although, maybe that would be ideal for them, they wouldn't be hurt by any lingering strangers.

"First, let's get that tea cup back in order so Aidene can work on transfiguration. Rhea, calmly think of that tea cup back together for reparo, and then cast it. Forget about what the broken thing looks like, it'll potentially upset you enough to not be able to fix it. And if you can't fix what's broken... well that's just not the point is it?" He stood behind Rhea, ready to help her arm movement if she needed it, wanting to help the little duckling however he could. Meanwhile, he tried to rack his mind for what they learned in first year for charms or transfiguration. He wanted to be able to help Aidene just as much as he helped Rhea. Could it have only been 2 years ago he was doing his first year exams?

"Hey Yeti, I sure hope you brought a list of knowledge for the first year exams so we know what to review. You are resonsible enough to do that right?" He smirked at her, before turning his attention back to Rhea.

Aidene felt that she distinctly could not be trusted to read her notes--whether that was because she’d always put it off or because her notes were illegible was another story-- but if it meant avoiding Mr. Even More Reading crashing the Cram Party, then she could... not mention that.

She was a little disappointed Aldrick simply banished the teacup, but Lizzie awarded her five points, so that worked out. Aldrick’s first rule was also disappointing, but he had a point. Plus, she’d seen how quickly the cup she’d sent went flying away. She did not want to be on the receiving end of that spell. Not yet anyways.

With a polite little clap for Rhea’s repaired cup, Aidene accepted the cup for her Transfiguration practical. Okay. She’d just seen Rhea do this masterfully. Teacup to gerbil. Teacup to hamster thing. Teacup to Hamtaro. There. She could imagine that hamster better than one of the many critters they’d encountered in Transfiguration. Teacup to Hamtaro. Point and click say. ”Fallorodentia,” she pronounced. The teacup trembled a little and grew years and bright orange fur, but nothing else. Well, that was disappointing. ”Reparifarge,” she whispered sheepishly. The fur and ears faded away, but the teacup remained bright orange and white. She passed the cup back to Rhea. ”Can you do that again?”