[$] Not Myself [Avengers rp] (MDaylus)

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

“All you can do with Fenrir is try to explain it to him….maybe even see if Jor or Hela will come and help you explain.” Tony said slowly. “And as far as Odin goes, he might try something, but he can’t do anything now. I’ll be with you, Thor’s on speed dial and is not too far away if he books it, and Frigga will help too. Odin’s already lost the throne and the power that comes with it….I doubt he could truly hope to do much.” He said firmly. Lifting a hand, he cupped Loki’s cheek gently. “I know it’s hard Lo, but you can’t look at the bad stuff right now. You have to look at the good. Odin’s lost most of his power over you and Fenrir, both Thor and your mother are willing and able to help you now, you have me and all the other Avengers willing to help you look, and even if Fenrir is not on the island, if there’s a clue, it’s the first step forward you’ve been able to take in years.”  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

"Jormungandr told me to be careful,to not be careless despite Fenrir being my son." Loki spoke softly looking down once more. He wanted to argue that Tony couldn't hope to compete with Odin especially without his suit close by, Thor might be too far away to reach them in time and Frigga could be stuck in some meeting with the council if Odin did things correct. Leaning into Tony's hand as it cupped his face the god closed his eyes. Nodding when Tony continued to try to convince Loki that he could not look at the bad when he had so many others to help him look for his son or fight off Odin. "I hope we do find him, I hope with everything I am. But I am scared Tony, what if everything goes wrong what if I can't help him or he doesn't understand. I don't know what to do, I have wanted to find him for so long to tell him how sorry I am but what if whatever I try is not enough. I got lucky with Jormungandr." Loki questioned opening his eyes and looking to Tony with despair.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony shook his head. “Jor was just being realistic. I’m sure he wants Fenrir back and happy. And Hela was the one who told me to keep looking for Fenrir for you. They want their brother, they love him.” He said firmly. When Loki met his eyes, Tony’s face softened. “Lo….all you can do is try. Trying means so much more than you give yourself credit for. You love your son, you love him more than I’ve ever seen anyone love anyone else and you fought so hard for him. If things don’t work out, we’ll figure out what to do. And I mean we. I’m going to be right beside you, all the way through.” He said gently. “I can buy land somewhere, help you figure out a way to keep him and his magic from hurting anyone. We can give him more freedom and care than he’s had in a long, long time, even if it’s not perfect.”  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki nodded when Tony told him that Jormungandr was just being realistic and that he and his sister truly did want their brother back. It just seemed like there was more pressure to try and get Fenrir back. The god's shoulders slumped when Tony told him that all he could do was try. He had been hoping that the man might have some advice something that could help him but hearing that all he could do was try. "I do not feel like I have fought as I could have..." Loki murmured. With all the secrets he had, especially the one that could have freed him son. A soft smile twitched Loki's lips when Tony said that he would be right beside him in helping Loki with Fenrir even going so far as to buy some land for his son to roam on. "It would just be a bigger cage." Loki sighed. He didn't know if that was really any better being able to run. Loki was considering if he could move Fenrir to another realm which had no one on it. Maybe one of those many planets that Midgardians suggested were out there.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony nodded. “Perhaps it would be, in a way. But he would have more space and he would have the help of people that cared about him….and maybe with time, he’d come around. The only way that anything can improve or change with him will be to have you around to take care of him, to help him.” He said gently. Petting Loki’s hair carefully, he Tony sighed. “I know it’s hard, but there is no use worrying about it right now. We don’t even know what we’ll find on the island, if we even find anything.” He said carefully. “I’ll see if the cooks have any more oranges and mangos that you can snack on and I need to do some work on my reactor.” He said, trying to tempt Loki out of his mood.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki looked to Tony when the man said that Fenrir would have more space and people who cared about him. Perhaps Tony was right, with a bit of freedom and people who cared perhaps Fenrir would come around. Leaning against Tony when the man pet his hair he gave a shuddered breath when the man said that he knew it was hard but there was no use worrying about it when they weren't sure they were going to find Fenrir on the island. Loki gave a hum of acknowledgement when the man said he would check with the cooks about more fruit. He looked up when the man said that he had to work on his arc reactor. "What is wrong with it?" Loki questioned.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony relaxed as he felt Loki slowly giving in a little. He knew the god was still stressed, would always be until they found Fenrir, but this was progress. Laughing at the question, Tony shook his head. “Nothing’s wrong, not really. I just need to clean it a little. Sea water and fine machinery are not always the best of friends.” He said lightly. “And I honestly need to get tools in my hands before I go insane.” He added as he let go of Loki and stepped away, already heading for the buzzer to ask for some fruit from the kitchen. When that was done, he came back to the table, taking a seat with his back facing the door. Still, he didn’t move until the cook came up with a small tray of fruit and set it down, waiting for him to leave before he finally pulled his shirt off. There wasn’t a person in the world who didn’t know about the reactor by now, but it was still Tony’s weakness, his vulnerability, so he refused to show it around most people.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki was relieved to hear that there was nothing wrong with Tony's arc reactor. He could understand how sea water and sand was not good for the machine. A real smile broke across his face with the man said he would go insane if he didn't get tools in his hands soon. "I told you, you would need a lab on a ship if you decided to live this life." Loki teased as Tony stepped away calling for the fruit. He sat back down into the seat feeling a bit better about things even if he still worried. He thanked the cook when he delivered the fruit and munched on it almost as soon as the man had gone. "Thank you..." Loki told Tony when they were alone.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

“And I never argued that.” Tony replied. “I practically need to carry a lab around with me all the time.” He said lightly. Tony was just starting to pull the reactor out of his chest, though he left the cords attached when Loki thanked him. Looking to the god with an arched brow, he looked the god over. “Thank you?” he asked slowly, already wiping down the outside of the reactor with a damp cloth, take his time and making sure to reach every inch of the machine.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki smiled a bit more when Tony said that he had never argued that he would need the lab. He nodded when Tony said that he needed a lab with him all the time. He watched as Tony pulled the arc reactor from his chest unsure how he feels about what constitutes as his mates heart being pulled out of him. "For understanding and helping me." Loki stated softly. He knew Tony would brush him off about this, tell him he deserved it but Loki still felt that it needed to be said. To thank his mate for supporting him in ways no one else had.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony sensed Loki’s unease, so he refused to look up at him. He knew what it had look like, how strange the idea was, and he was no more comfortable with it all than Loki, but it had to be done. Honestly, Tony had to distance himself from it for the most part. If he thought too hard about it, he’d make himself sick, he was sure of it. Hearing what Loki was thanking him for, Tony smiled. “As if you haven’t done that for me more times than I can count.” He replied gently.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki smiled with Tony when the man smiled at him. "I know we have done it for each other but it still needs to be said. I do not wish you to think that I do not appreciate it or that I would take it for granted." Loki responded. He munched some more on the fruit. Looking back to the sea he hummed in contemplation to himself. Jormungandr had warned him to be careful with his brother, perhaps Jormungandr knew something more than his son had let on.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony smiled again at the god’s words, but didn’t reply, just accepting his reasoning this time. He continued to silently work on his reactor, taking pieces off to wipe down or inspect, carefully cupping the device with one hand the whole time, functioning with surprising ease with the other. If there was one machine he knew like the back of his hand, this was it. He could take one apart and put it together again in his sleep. He did stop rather often though, stilling as the yacht rose over a particularly large swell, holding the reactor closer to his chest as he waited for the yacht to level out again before he continued work. Eventually he finished cleaning however and simply held the device staring at it as he turned it over in his hands. “It’s strange….out of everything I have ever made in my life…..this was my greatest invention…..and it’s the one invention I can’t really let the world have, can’t let them see.” He said slowly, thumb brushing over the pattern breaking up the blue light.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki looked back to Tony after a bit of silence and watched the man clean the arc reactor. He was set on putting the magic on the reactor so no one could take it from his mate. He had so much to do when they returned to the mansion, so much research to do and if they found Fenrir it would be so much more. He focused on Tony when the man spoke about the arc reactor was his greatest invention and yet the one he could not share with the world. "I will still make sure that you or whoever you allow are the only ones that can remove it." Loki reminded.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Tony glanced at his lover when he spoke, a faint quirk of his lips following the thought. “I’m not overly concerned with that. The only man who’s ever taken this from me was because of my own stupidity in trusting too much. Trusting someone who’d really never done anything to earn it.” He said slowly. “But thanks for the thought all the same.” Looking back to the machine, he shook his head. “A little glowing box is the key to everything I am and everything I do now….and I came up with it will living off of a car battery in a cave in the middle of the desert…..” he made a face at the memory, turning the machine over one more time before he carefully put it back in its place, locking it in and lightly hitting it with his palm to reassure himself that it was in.