201 ΡδρζαΓ

[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam didn't mind the male's bluntness, after all he saw it better to be yourself then to hide and pretend your something more. He liked to hear the truth no matter how harsh it could be. Liam didn't want to be lied to by any one. There had been people in his life whom had lied to him, but he could admit he had lied too. As the male spoke of the language, he couldn't help but want to talk more. Liam had been born and raised to speak French, and English was his second language. He was born in Louisiana a place where French was all around him; in school, at home, at stores, and practically every place he went. Liam shook his head to the male's question, "No, it's my primary. I was raised in French speaking family. I didn't learn English till I was older." He replied smiling thinking about his childhood.

As a child most of the students going to school, grew up learning English in their home. He couldn't ever understand them, and neither him. Liam didn't want to learn English he didn't think he had to, after all being a child shouldn't every one speak the same language. He always thought he was right for his choice but as he entered into his late elementary years, he was forced to learn English after all it was the primary tongue of choice. Liam had difficultly at times but others wise he spoke it perfectly, but still reverted back to his common language. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine would be lying if he said he wasn't impressed. He didn't know any other languages himself, so he found it rather interesting that English was the males' second language. He could hint an accent, but if he wasn't paying attention he hardly even noticed it. But when he did, catch it, it was kinda cute. Again, he nodded and smiled to the males words. "I see," he said softly. "So what exactly did you say?" He wasn't sure if the male would honestly tell him, but he asked all the same. He was curious and always had a slight irritation when someone would purposely say something in another language in front of him. He always got the feeling that someone was saying something bad about him and thought it best if they were going to talk bad about him, might as well say it in English. It was childish and a little selfish, but he wanted to know. Alaine uncrossed his legs and leaned forward, placing his arms on the table and resting his chin in the palm of his hand as he waited for the males' reply.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam knew the question would come up. After all it was rude to speak behind someone's back, especially in another language they didn't know. He couldn't help but smile as the male spoke, as he moved. Liam knew the male was trying to be serious, as he leaned forward on the table. He glanced over at the vending machines behind him, before looking back at the male. "I said that you must be hungry." Liam replied, as he thought about it. He had watched the male grab random food without even caring what it was. Liam knew the male had his reasons but those were his reasons alone. He hoped the male thought his words to be the truth, after all he hadn't been lying. Liam had no reason to lie to the male, over something so small and insignificant. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine waited patiently for the male to reply. He followed his gaze to the vending machines, his stomach, without warning, giving another strong rumble. Vending machine food did not make a very good meal. He snorted a laugh at the males' words, smirking as he glance back at the male. Alaine gave a light shurg as he held back a chuckle. He thought it was a bit of a waste to go through the trouble of saying something like that in another language. Now it was something more offensive, maybe he'd see why. But this? Why not just tell him in English. "What can I say? I was a hop, skip, and jump from going into "zombie" mode." he said. He knew he needed to take better care of himself. He absolutely hated being in "zombie mode". It was a state of mind where he was both completely aware and unaware of the world surrounding him. A state where his blood sugar was so dangerously low that he needed to force himself to stay focused on the current task at hand. He was surprised he even made it into work okay, the whole time he was driving, he could feel the gnawing painful feeling of his body going against him. When he had walked into work, he felt like he was going to pass out, he was surprised he didn't freak the male out. According to some of his other co-workers, it was a sight to behold when he went too long without insulin.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" For such small words, he knew it was stupid to hide it behind French, but he couldn't help it. He usually spoke in his native tongue, especially when he was speaking to himself. Liam didn't like the English language all that much but being in New York he had no choice. He looked at the male as he seemed amused by his words and how insignificant they seemed. A blush of scarlet red embarrassed by the male's reaction. Liam hadn't wanted to say anything to the male in the first place, after all he hardly knew the male, and seemed more relax with not speaking to him directly. As the male spoke, he looked at him curiously not really understanding his meaning. "What does that mean?" He asked curiously and all confused. Liam didn't know any one whom had diabetes so he couldn't really understand what it meant when a person had side effects to it. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine sighed as he wracked his brain on the best way to explain it. He knew it was one of those things were if you didn't have it, you couldn't always completely understand. So he wanted to be as clear as possible. Liam wasn't the only person in the club that didn't know he was a diabetic. He didn't make a public thing like others he knew. For years, he'd been debating whether to get a medical tattoo just for such purposes. He waited a few minutes trying to think. "Alright, let's put it like this. You know that feeling you get when you first wake after a day of hard work. Your body feels like lead, it's hard to get up, and you kinda have to force yourself to stay awake so you don't do something stupid. Well that's kinda what "zombie mode" is. Only there's more pain, it's harder to concentrate. You're completely disoriented. And to get back to normal, you have to balance your foods. Like I if I know I'm getting low and I only have drinks to rely on to get back to normal, I'll maybe switch between sweet tea and unsweet tea.You have to raise and fall before you can get to a level that's somewhat normal." Alaine paused, hoping he was making sense. "Now as for what you witnessed, I was close to falling into that state, but I still had enough sense to get here. Before you can really do anything on raising your levels, you have to check it first. I over 300, which can be deadly to some diabetics, or at least high enough to endorse a diabetic comma. The insulin helps bring my levels down, after that, I still needed to eat so I combined crackers, sweets, and soda to help somewhat even myself out. Right now I'm sitting around 130, which is fine for now. But I still need to watch out because a bunch of snacks don't make a meal."


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam had never been around a person who had diabetes. His only contact with something that dealt with medical issued was his father. At a young age his father had passed away due to lung cancer. His father was a heavy smoker, he had started smoking when he was twelve years old, but that was normal back then. As the male spoke he listened to him, though it was hard to understand. One couldn't understand the difficulties unless they had it, he knew that. Liam tried to make sense of it all, but he couldn't. "Why don't you control it better, so it doesn't get to that level?" He didn't know if the question would upset the male. After all he was invading into his privacy, and didn't want to upset the male by prying. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Again he shrugged at the males question. He'd been asking himself the same thing. He no longer had the excuse of getting used to it. He was originally diagnosed ten years ago. "I don't know." he said, "I've just never really been able to keep up with daily medications." He knew it sounded lame, but it was true. Even when he got sick he could never keep up with a daily prescription. It was like he didn't have it in him to keep to a daily routine, it just wasn't possible. And because of this, he was only able to keep up with at least three times a week. And for the other days, he had days like yesterday where his personal life became more important than staying healthy. It was bad, he knew this. But in order to get a real schedule going, someone was going to have to engrave it into his brain. Until then, he was just going to keep doing as he did, which in the long run was more likely to kill him than save him.



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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Perhaps Liam was just used to schedules and being on time. He was never late and was always early even an hour early sometimes. Liam liked order, he wasn't good with disorder and things not going his way. He didn't understand how people couldn't be on time, especially in the morning. Liam hated driving in the morning, it was normally rush hour traffic because people were late. As the male spoke, he sighed softly not understanding the male. He didn't see how the male could just disregard his health like it was nothing. "Why not?" Liam asked slightly annoyed with the male. He couldn't see how people couldn't take care of themselves. The only thing he could think of was that the male didn't care about himself and what happened to him if he didn't take his medication. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Habits can't be broken, only replaced. The mind replaces that habit with something that can be more easily managed. That was Alaine's excuse for why he didn't keep up with his medication as he should. He didn't buy it. As he stated, he honestly didn't know why he couldn't keep up. Most of the time sheer neglect and just leaving it here at work. If he met someone or got drunk, it was a lost cause to try to remember it. Even if he did manage to remember, there was a low chance that it would even still be at home the next morning. The club might not have been the safest place to keep his medicine, but he felt better about leaving it here locked in a cheap locker than at home were one of his "guests" could easily help themselves. As Liam continued to question him, he could tell he wasn't too keen about the idea of him not taking care of himself either. With another sigh, he looked away from the male toward the floor for a moment. "I don't like it....I hate giving myself shots and pricking pricking my fingers all the time. It's annoying to have to carry around a gym bag so I can keep up with all the medications, I can't eat the things I like, half the time my body feels like a walking refrigerator, it's all just......it feels like it's chaining me down. I'm on seven medications, take at least five shots a day, have six different doctors and for one little disease. If I miss a few days, who cares, I know how to keep up without it." he was talking more to himself than to Liam, but he didn't care if the male heard him. Besides, he asked him why he couldn't keep up and there it was.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Life was something Liam cherished, perhaps because there had been to many people in his life that had wasted away. His father, grandmother, and even his grandfather had passed away already and he was still young. They all passed away when he was young and sometimes it was hard to remember them. At times, he wished he could go back in time just to spend time with his families members but he knew it was impossible. Liam had no business getting into the male's personal life, but perhaps the male needed a wake up call. As the male spoke he listened, confused in the male's unwillingness to take care of himself. "And what if you die?" Liam asked curiously, he had never wanted to die, but then again we all die some time in our life. He just didn't want to die young, he couldn't see how people did things to themselves just so they could die in the end. Those who drank and did drugs always died early unless they did something to help themselves. It wasn't any different than having a medical problem only those who wanted to live would, if they took care of themselves. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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"Then I die." he said, looking back at the male and grinning. If only his smile touched his eyes and didn't look so strained. Then perhaps someone might believe him when he said these words. He knew the way he was living was bad. But even so, he'd rather live bad than to be chained down all the time. "My life is already reduced as it is. There's no cure for diabetes, and I highly doubt there ever will be. So who gives a damn if I ******** around?" Alaine looked the male directly in the eye as he spoke. Just who was this guy? And why did he give a damn if he died? It wasn't like they were really anything to each other. They barely qualified for aquantance's. For now, they were just two strangers exchanging words. He didn't even know this guy and yet he was showing more concern than himself for not taking proper care. He felt like a child being scolded by a parent. "If you're so concerned about the way I take care of myself, why don't you do something about him?" he suggested. 'I'd like to see you try though.' he thought sarcastically.

He honestly would like to see what Liam would do. Maybe once upon a time Alaine would have done exactly as he was supposed to keep himself in good shape, but after ten years, it got tiresome. All the needles, the supplies. If he added it all up, he was certain his bills for the year would reach well over ten thousand. He didn't even want to think how much it would be without insurance. On top of that, he was beginning to believe boss only kept him around so he would have health insurance. He maybe a crappy employee, but adding in doctors, medication, gas, and other things needed to keep himself up to par, they were easily looking at at least a couple of thousand a year. Alaine kept his eyes on Liam, his smile still in place and awaiting for the males answer. What could he honestly do to force Alaine to take his medicine daily like he was supposed to? Shove it down his throat? Put the needles in him, himself? Try it, see if he didn't get cut.



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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" As the male spoke, Liam could tell the male was lying to him. He could see the uncertainty in his eyes as he spoke, even though he was trying to put on this front. Liam wondered how real the male was, or was he just playing with him. He couldn't see how anyone could just live as if they don't care. Liam knew what the male was saying was true, after all it wasn't as if it was being cured it was kind of like cancer eating you alive day by day. He looked at the male as he continued to speak, seeing he didn't care what happened to him, and saw that he didn't care what happened to those around him. Liam knew Diabetes wasn't a big disease people lived long healthy lives but only if they kept up with it.

Listening to the male he didn't know what to do to help him. After all one could only help themselves, he didn't know the male well enough but he still wanted to help him. Liam didn't know why but he wondered if all the male had was himself. To him the male was bitter in a way, childish in fact, even though he was probably older than him. "And what about your friends and family? When you die then what? You'll just say Oh Well?" Liam replied at the many angrily for giving up so easily. He couldn't imagine the male's life or how he had been living. Liam didn't know this male it was true, he was just some random stranger getting mad at him over his own life. "You need help Alaine, either your too scared or you don't care." He replied softly as he sighed. Liam wanted to help but how did you help someone who wouldn't even help themselves. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine had enough of the male. This conversation was going nowhere and he could tell the male was starting to get pissed with his life choices. Just his luck to find the one stripper with a humanity complex. His smile slipped from his lips as the male started to cope an attitude. Who was he to talk to him like this? Who was he to judge him so harshly? He didn't know a damn thing about him. He merely shrugged at the males question, a twinge of hurt tugging at his heart as the male questioned him about what his family would think. How was he supposed to know what they would think? From the day he was born, all he knew was the inside of a crappy, molding, orphan age. And friends? Not a chance. The only real friend he had his boss. The two had met by chance, if it wasn't for his boss, he would probably be dead right now. Samuel Davidson is his name. His boss, his friend, his savior. If he was going to take crap, it would only be from Sam.

Scowling at the male, Alaine rose from his chair and wandered over to the couch, flopping down like a lazy cat. He didn't need this. He didn't want this. But the male wasn't too far off. In fact, he was dead on. Alaine wasn't just afraid, he was terrified. And he didn't just not care, frankly, he didn't give a damn. He cared, but he didn't care. It was an odd feeling, but it was there. He knew he didn't take care of himself, and it was stupid to be so reckless. But it wasn't as though he had much going for him. If being diabetic didn't kill him, then he was likely to die from an STD. It wasn't like he was practicing safe sex. Probably best not to tell the male about that either, for fear he'll start lecturing him on the importance of using a condom as well. Flopping down, Alaine lay there, turned away from the male, he had his eyes closed and his arms crossed across his chest. He didn't bother answering the male, let him draw up his own conclusions. Alaine was a dying diabetic, a whore, and a terrible employee. Who in their right mind would possibly miss him?

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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam knew he had angered the male but it was no his intention. He had no right to tell the male how to live his life. If the male wanted to die then by all means it was his right. Liam couldn't control him, especially since he didn't even know the male. He was just putting himself in a position in which he shouldn't have. Liam had family and friends who cared about him, so he knew nothing about the male's life. He knew he should have kept his mouth shut, instead of trying to even talk to the male. Liam wasn't trying to judge the male, he had just made a mistake on trying to invade into the male's choices.

He watched as the male pushed himself away from the table, and moved toward the couch. Liam glanced over at him, knowing it was time to keep his mouth shut. He wondered if the male would ever talk to him again, but perhaps he had just stuck his foot into a one time opportunity. Liam had actually liked speaking with the male, it gave him a chance to see a different perspective on the male. He didn't think the male was a bad person, quite the opposite. Alaine was a person of interest someone he wanted to get to know, but it was probably too late. Liam looked away from the male sighing softly, he wondered if coming into work late would have been better today. Liam heard the male move, he glanced back over to see he was laying down looking away from him. He had to apologize to the male even if he didn't want to accept it. Liam stood up, as he moved toward the couch, he kept a few steps away from the male. "I'm sorry Alaine. It was not my place to speak out like that." He replied softly before stepping away, he grabbed his bag and stepped toward the door. Liam thought it would be best to clear his head. "