The English-to-12-Year-Old-AOLer Translator

[PsychoDagger]

Wow. This is... kind of pathetic. Haha.  

[Elanchana]

I think it's improperly named. Last year (I was 12) I was on AOL a lot and did not talk like that.  

[-The Insane Faerie-]

I'm 13, and I never talked like that. But check this out. I entered Hips don't Lie by Shakira, Spanish lyrics and all. It's a sad sad world, how they ruin a perfecly good song and language...

Quote:

Ladies up in here tonight
No fighting, no fighting
We got the refugees up in here
No fighting, no fighting

Shakira, Shakira

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man wants to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection

Hey Girl, I can see your body moving
And it's driving me crazy
And I didn't have the slightest idea
Until I saw you dancing

And when you walk up on the dance floor
Nobody cannot ignore the way you move your body, girl
And everything so unexpected - the way you right and left it
So you can keep on shaking it

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel you boy
Come on lets go, real slow
Don't you see baby asi es perfecto

Oh I know I am on tonight my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection
Shakira, Shakira

Oh boy, I can see your body moving
Half animal, half man
I don't, don't really know what I'm doing
But you seem to have a plan
My will and self restraint
Have come to fail now, fail now
See, I am doing what I can, but I can't so you know
That's a bit too hard to explain

Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de día

Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de día

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You know you got me hypnotized
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

Senorita, feel the conga, let me see you move like you come from Colombia

Mira en Barranquilla se baila así, say it!
Mira en Barranquilla se baila así

Yeah
She's so sexy every man's fantasy a refugee like me back with the Fugees from a 3rd world country
I go back like when 'pac carried crates for Humpty Humpty
I need a whole club dizzy
Why the CIA wanna watch us?
Colombians and Haitians
I ain't guilty, it's a musical transaction
No more do we snatch ropes
Refugees run the seas 'cause we own our own boats

I'm on tonight, my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel you boy
Come on let's go, real slow
Baby, like this is perfecto

Oh, you know I am on tonight and my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel it's right
The attraction, the tension
Baby, like this is perfection

No fighting
No fighting

To:

Quote:

LADEIS UP IN H3RE 2NIGHT
NO FIGHTNG NO FIGHTNG
W3 GOT DA R3FUGES UP IN HERA
NO FIGHTNG NO FIGHTNG

SHAKIRA SHAKIRA

I NEVAR RILLY KNEW TAHT SHE CUD DANCA LIEK THIS
SHE MAEKS A MAN WANTS 2 SPAAK SPANISH
COMO S3 LMA (SI) BONITA (SI) MI CASA (SI SHAKIRA SHAKIRA) SU CASA
SHAKIRA SHAKIRA

O BABY WH3N U TOK LIEK U MAEK A WOMAN GO MAD
SO B WIES AND KEP ON
R3ADNG TEH SIGNS OF MAH BODY

AND IMM ON U KNOW MAH HIPS DONT LEI
AND IMM STARTNG 2 FEL ITS RIGHT
AL TEH ATRACTION DA TENSION
DONT U SE BABY THES SI PERFECTION

HEY GIRL I CAN SE UR BODY MOVNG
AND ITS DRIVNG M3 CRAZY
AND I DIDNT HAEV TEH SLIGHTEST IEDA
UNTIL I SAW U DANCNG

AND WHEN U WOK UP ON DA DANC3 FLOR
NOBODY CANOT IGNOR3 TEH WAY U MOVA UR BODY GIRL
AND 3V3RYTHNG SO UN3XPECTED - TEH WAY U RIGHT AND LEFT IT
SO U CAN KEP ON SHAKNG IT

I N3VER RILLY KNEW TAHT SH3 CUD DANCA LIEK THIS
SHE MAEKS A MAN WANT 2 SPAAK SPANISH
COMO SE LMA (SI) BONITA (SI) MI CASA (SI SHAKIRA SHAKIRA) SU CASA
SHAKIRA SHAKIRA

O BABY WH3N U TOK LIEK U MAEK A WOMAN GO MAD
SO B WIES AND KEP ON
R3ADNG TEH SIGNS OF MAH BODY

AND IMM ON U KNOW MAH HIPS DONT LEI
AND IM STARTNG 2 FEL U BOY
COM3 ON LETS GO R3AL SLOW
DONT U SE BABY ASI AS PERF3C2

O I KNOW IM ON 2NIGHT MAH HIPS DONT LEI
AND IM STARTNG 2 FEL ITS RIGHT
AL TEH ATRACTION TEH TENSION
DONT U SE BABY THES SI P3RF3CTION
SHAKIRA SHAKIRA

O BOY I CAN SE UR BODY MOVNG
HALF ANIMAL HALF MAN
I DONT DONT RILLY KNOW WUT IMM DONG
BUT U SEM 2 HAEV A PLAN
MY WIL AND SALF RASTRANET
HAEV COM3 2 FALE NOW FALE NOW
SE IM DONG WUT I CAN BUT I CANT SO U KNOW
TAHTS A BIT 2 HARD 2 3XPLANE

BALEA EN LA CALE DE NOCHA
BALEA EN LA CAL3 DE DÍA

BALEA EN LA CAL3 DE NOCHA
BALEA EN LA CAL3 DE DÍA

I N3V3R RILLY KNEW TAHT SHE CUD DANCE LIEK THIS
SH3 MAEKS A MAN WANT 2 SPAAK SPANISH
COMO SE LMA (SI) BONITA (SI) MI CASA (SI SHAKIRA SHAKIRA) SU CASA
SHAKIRA SHAKIRA

O BABY WH3N U TOK LIEK U KNOW U GOT M3 HYPNOTIEZD
SO B WIES AND KEP ON
R3ADNG DA SIGNS OF MAH BODY

SENORITA FEL DA CONGA L3T ME SE U MOV3 LIEK U COMA FROM COLOMBIA

MIRA EN BARANQUILA SE BALEA ASÍ SAY IT
MIRA!!111111 AN BARANQUILA SE BALEA ASÍ

YAAH
SHAS SO S3XY AV3RY MANS FANTASY A RAFUGE LIEK MA BAK WIT DA FUGES FROM A 3RD WORLD COUNTRY
I GO BAK LIEK WHAN PAC CAREID CRAETS FOR HUMPTY HUMPTY
I NED A WHOLE CLUB Y TEH CIA WANA WATCH US
COLOMBIANS?!!!? AND HATEIANS
I ANET GUILTY ITS A MUSICAL TRANSACTION
NO MORE DO WE SNATCH ROPAS
REFUGES RUN TEH S3AS CAUES W3 OWN OUR OWN BOATS

IMM ON 2NIGHT MAH HIPS DONT LEI
AND IMM STARTNG 2 FEL U BOY
COME ON LETS GO RAAL SLOW
BABY LIEK THES SI PARFAC2

O U KNOW IM ON 2NIGHT AND MAH HIPS DONT LEI
AND IM STARTNG 2 FEL ITS RIGHT
THA ATRACTION DA TENSION
BABY LIEK THES SI P3RF3CTION

NO FIGHTNG
NO FIGHTNG

 

[Soviet Reunion]

Look what I did:

Quote:

IM QUIET COMPLEX AND UES PROPER GRMMAR 2 MAH FULEST 3XT3NT!11!!1 LOL PLZ TAEK MAH OPINION SERIOSLEY AS IF I W3R3 UR FR3IND IN A DEP CONV3RSATION!!!!11

 

[Embodiment Of The Living]

Oh, good lord.

Normal speak.

Some people do not want to work unless they have a job of prestige, that is, a job others admire or envy. To obtain such a position, one must be prepared to perform the tasks th job requires. Realize this now; prepare yourself..

L33t speak.
SOME PEOPLE DO NOT WANT 2 WORK UNLES THEY HAEV A JOB OF PRASTIEG TAHT IS A JOB OTHERS ADMIER OR ENVY!!11!11 OMG LOL 2 OBTANE SUCH A POSITION ONA MUST B PREPAERD 2 PERFORM DA TASKS TH JOB REQUIERS!1!111!1 LOL REALIEZ THES NOW R U!!111!!1!11!!1 OMG WTF LOL

I would rather cut off my d*ck and feed it to a wild bear than to speak like that...  

[-The Insane Faerie-]

Oh, wow. I'd rather take my most favorite online thing in the world (Homestar) and throw it down a cliff than talk like that.  

[strawberryfizz]

Hehe, I could use this to my advantage with some annoying people I know . That is really awesome, and addicting, like the press this red button thing.  

[Keren]

It makes me die inside with laughter.

"IM ANTI-TXT TLK!!!11 OMG LOL I SUPORT GOD GRMMAR!!1!!!11! OMG WTF IM PART OF TEH SAEV DA VOW3LS MOVEM3NT!!!1!!1 WTF FOR UR SANITY AND MIEN TYP3 OUT UR DMN WORDS!111! LOL THANK U!1!!11! OMG LOL"

And afterwards, it burns my soul.  

[DulcetMelody]

I actually wrote:

I am taking this as an insult! I am 12 years old, and frequently use AOL. I have never, and will never, talk like this.

It gave me:

IM TAKNG THES AS AN INSULT!1!!111!! OMG WTF LOL IM 12 Y3ARS OLD AND FREQUANTLEY UES AOL!!1!!!1 I HAEV N3VAR AND WIL N3VER TOK LIEK THIS!!!11!1  

[SilverMaple]

I typed in insults in dignified language. It looks so funny in chatspeak. lol

Quote:

You ignorant fool. How dare you insult me, when you yourself are nothing but a despicable half-wit? I am ashamed to be in the same room as you. Be gone, you imbecile, and leave me!

Which gives this

Quote:

U IGNORANT FOL!!!!1!1!1 OMG LOL HOW R U INSULT ME WH3N U U R NOTHNG BUT A DESPICABLE HALF-WIT?!?!!?!!! LOL IM ASHMED 2 B IN TEH SM3 ROM AS U!1!1! B GONE U IMBCIEL AND L3AEV ME!!111! OMG

 

[-The Insane Faerie-]

Whoever made this is so ebil...  

[[bleedrainbows]]

Hey! I'm 12! T.T My grammar is just fine!

 

[Ninchii]

GabbySilverwood

They actually do have leet to english translators. Just check google, or here. http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/leet.php
Man, I really have to learn how to make a hyper link.
Edit: Sorry, it's just another cool translator.

Oh my g-, according to that translator; the majority of gaians speaking in l337 are only speaking at 32%.

O_o
That's a tad bit scary.  

[Smesshie Muffins]

My...eyes! They burn!! But to the people who are 12 :: It is just a generalization. Not all 12 year old have bad grammar. To tell you the truth... people much older talk like that D;  

[King Kento]

I have to agree with the 12 year olds, im 19 and i take offense t that, I used to use aol when I lived with my parents and I also didnt speak like that at 12.

regardless it is funny, so I used:

See here, thats my billfold you rogue!

and in text speak:

SE HARE TAHTS MAH BILFOLD U ROGUA!1111!!11 OMG WTF LOL