[J] Ean's Diary +Illusionist: Aaron Arrikanez+

[Juridian Soul]

Birds Of A Feather

Satin Regret

It was fairly chilly out, the middle of winter after all. The ground was covered in a light layer of snow, the good kind. A little soft, not frozen over, and the sort that stuck together, making for good snowballs. The trees were bare of leaves, but the paths in the parks were fairly well shoveled. The benches had thin layers of snow, and the playground was covered with a number of children who had dragged their parents out to play.

Two siblings, a teenager and a young child, were present as well. Their mother, the sun-loving Niko, had decided to stay home, due to her hate of snow and cold. Zuko and Fell, though, had decided to wander outside. Fell, much bigger then he used to be, was riding gleefully on his older brother's shoulders, a little hand wrapped around one of Zuko's ram horns.

Zuko was indulging Fell, as he was his only little brother after all. Better then leaving him with Sere, who would be more likely to go be moody somewhere, or Aqua, who would forget the moment she saw something interesting.

They were approaching the playground, Fell jumping off Zuko's shoulders with a helpful flap of his wings, clambering up one of the cold metal ladders in his puffy winter jacket and gloves.

Aaron Arrikanez

Ean was in that selfsame park, crouched low in the hollow of one of the trees beside the path. He was about a foot away from the teen and toddler when he slid from the space, like smoke or mist, and stood before them on the path. There was something odd about him the moment one looked at him. He was a toddler, as Fell was, but he seemed so much older. There was a chilled feeling in the air that had nothing to do with the snow. As if that patch of path had grown colder on its own. The boy seemed to be listening to something, but made no reply to it, tilting his head a little to one side to eye the teen, almost like he was sizing him up. That done, he backed away, but only a few feet, and continued to watch. Whether or not he would continue down the path was unknown, but Ean's eyes stalked the two better than anyone on foot, and those eyes held... not malice... but something dark and intangible. Something soft, but chilling.. and terrifying. Ean seemed not to notice or care - only smiled - a sweet, sad little quirk of his lips - before waiting for any action taken by the others.

Satin Regret

Zuko smiled fondly at his little brother as Fell swung across the monkey bars, quite nimbly, swinging around on his hands and with his legs. Trusting the toddler not to dash his brains out on the ground, Zuko took a moment to look around, maybe for some pretty women to cozy up to. It was then that his purple-gold gaze fell on a little child, person. The body of someone Fell's age, but he looked older, kinda creepy. And he hadn't been there before.

Stopping a frown from forming on his face, he crouched down, his tail out behind him to keep himself balanced, his wings folded to his shoulders. "Hullo there." He said with a smile, also attracting Fell's attention.

When he heard his brother speak, the raven child turned to look at him, seeing the other boy near him, and quietly dropped from the bars, literally hoppig in two legged bounds over to them, a broad grin on his face. "Ha-lo!"

Aaron Arrikanez

The boy's eyes glowed - literally - for a moment or two, then the glow died, and the smile took on a more sinister nature. His eyes met Blackfell's, and a soft chuckle escaped his lips - far too much 'humor' for a child of his apparent age. He began to speak - but it was in rhyme. Morbid rhyme at that... it could have been a greeting... or a warning... who knew?

"Chosen dreams fall in the gray, night will whisper to the day. Silent snowflake, silent creeping, bitter taste of someone weeping. Look upon it, fear it's crying, ever falling, ever dying. Blood red water through the seas, plague be not the sole disease. Writhing trees moan in the wood, none of this can come to good. Eyes that burn like embers bright, demon's friend, and dark delight. Longer slumber, seek desire, thrown again into the fire. Speak the words of hidden meaning, sinister, though friendly seeming. Fear the one who tells the tale, fight it hard by tooth and nail. Show no anger, show no fear. Only ice has settled here."

His piece spoken, he fell silent, eyes once more glinted in some hidden mirth as he remained perfectly still. Waiting for the one who had approached him to fall, flee, or laugh. Either one would have been fine.
~Lucias... you taunt them so. Have you no heart within?~ The voice that spoke could be heard only to Ean - neither of his 'victims' heard a solitary word. But Ean did reply - quietly. Softly.

"Needs must come, into an end. Needed trust, or needed friend. Testing merit, power be - Lest the soul take fright and flee."

That was not said to Zuko, though - that was mostly under his breath. JUST loud enough for whatever had spoken to hear.

Satin Regret

Zuko was officially creeped out by the kid. His eyes were glowing, though it wasn't like he hadn't seen glowy eyed people before. It was the creepy voice, and the fact that he spoke in morbid little rhymes. Oh jeez, a pessimistic shakespeare addict maybe? Zuko kept a hand on the back of Fell's jacket, just in case he decided to get a little over-enthusiastic...

Fell on the other hand... The other boy's words essentially went in one ear and out the other, leaving no trace of their passing behind. To him, the kid just spoke extensively and with boring words. But his hair was shinnnyy.... Laughing loudly, a broad, delighted smile lighting his tanned face, Fell toddled forward, not entirely used to walking on two feet, to stand in front of Ean, a curious look on his face as he smiled, holding a gloved hand out. "Blackfell!" He said. The one word he could pronounce correctly as of yet.

Aaron Arrikanez

Ean gave no indication that he was in the least bit disturbed. He was a little creepy, yes - and for all his glowing eyes and sinister voice, the impression he gave was of complete sanity. However, talking to oneself could tilt that scale a little left of center. He took Blackfell's hand in his own. It was light shaking hands with a ghost... or a living statue. Fragile, frail - like 'Fell could break his hand with the slightest grip. But also cold as death. The breath that fell from the boy's lips did NOT fog in the frigid air. That in itself was probably not the best sign. Ean smiled.

"Fate will stay his hand this night, for the demon's sole delight. Hands of ice, and eyes of flame, capture mind and soul the same. Make the nighttime fear your call, lest by HIS dark eyes you fall."

A warning? A greeting? Once again, hard to tell. But this one sounded much more like a warning than a friendly [albeit strange] speech like last time. He held onto 'Fell's hand a little longer than he probably should have, but DID eventually let go.

Satin Regret

Fell gave the other boy a weird look, but quickly shrugged it off with an easy smile. "Wanna play? Delight in play, right?" He asked, grinning as he fluttered his wings through the hole in his jacket. His hair kept falling in his eyes, but he didn't notice. The other boy certainly was odd, but Fell didn't particularly care.

Zuko certainly did. But when it seemed Fell didn't mind, Zuko took a step back to lean against the play set, keeping an older-brotherly eye on Fell, but otherwise staying back.

Aaron Arrikanez

The creepy one grinned in a fairly disturbing manner, but started to slink off with the other child regardless. He didn't seem like he was going to HARM 'Fell at all. But on the other hand, he didn't look like he was up much for 'playing' either. He broke into a soft chuckle of laughter, and rested his back against one of the playsets.

"Remembered light, rain and ice, memories will sacrifice. The circle drawn, the summoned death, with fatal hand and fatal breath. No thing stirring, no thing lies - all things stirring, that thing dies."

 

[Juridian Soul]

Show Me The Light, Brother

More... More! The power was growing inside of him, and he knew it. He could see the tendrils of dark energy encircling him as easily as he could see mist, steam, or fog. It was exhilarating. This time, though, he knew this was a dream. He knew it, and he didn't care - it felt real enough to him. He was a child - a small child of about the same age as this current life. Nishin was behind him.. no... wait - He WAS Nishin. This was his brother's dream, and he was caught into the throes. It played out quickly, as though it had been planned. Torture. Torture and agony with each breath of super-charged air that filled his lungs with pain and pleasure. Or pain FOR pleasure. Nishin was a true masochist. From birth, every sensation of pain had turned itself to dopamine for him - pure ecstasy. It hadn't stopped. His language was rhymes and riddles, and from Ean's dream-state, he watched his brother control his body. But now it was time to take back control. Wresting the dream from his brother, he began to turn it around. Nishin faded from the dream-scape, replaced by a very confused, and very hurt Ean. And this Ean was ready to take back his life. He did not yet remember the pain that he would cause. He did not yet remember the betrayal he and his brother faced. But he did remember power. Thirst, hunger, CRAVING for power. And that was a craving he would soon satisfy. Power corrupts the youth - and Nishin's kind of magic was no different. The moment he gained dominion over his own mind and his own dreams, Ean started becoming like his older brother - Blackest soul and dull as dusk and dim as night.
Nishin stood back, and let his younger brother take the reigns. He had lived for too long in the dark. His power was incomplete. In order for him to fully understand his own workings, he must be subjected to the harsh Light that only his brother possessed. So he bided his time. Let his brother have the dark for now. Soon enough, he would be lead into the light. And that was what Nishin was waiting for. He would draw back for now, let the body once again become his little brother's. He'd be content to hover as a spirit, close by his side. But when the time came, he would regain control in a brutal attack - sending Ean's mind and soul into the vast nothingness into which HE had been cast. His brother would not escape the punishment for what crime he had committed. Once he remembered his past, his future would be in Nishin's hands. But for now - Waiting was the game. A game that the drow had been playing for centuries.  

[Juridian Soul]

Premonition of Danger

Ean's dreams had taken a strange turn, and this one was no different. He kept hearing voices - and something like a prophecy.. something eerie, and uncanny... but familiar. The voice which spoke to him was not Nishin's - but he did not know to who the voice belonged. During his dreams, it did not matter. All that mattered THEN was that he listen. And that he remember.

T'wixt mountaintop, and hills of green,
A dark thing lurking there, unseen,
With evil thoughts, and shadowed breath,
Who seeks to drag you down to Death,
Be brave, be strong, and seek it there,
Go deep within its secret lair,
For if you hear, and do not heed,
The Dark will spread, much like a weed,
To choke the living, slay them all,
After them, YOU TOO will fall,
Speak not the words of hate or fear,
For now the Dark One's lurking near,
To tempt you from your safe abode,
And slowly, to your strength erode,
Do not be careless, learn your skill,
Fortify your Power and Will,
Do not be fooled by wounded eyes,
Do not be lead by crafted lies,
For only you this Dark may fight,
Or else, entire worlds he'll blight.

Ean knew that he must heed - but the time had not come yet. And Nishin... would try to stop him. He knew it, and he was sad for it. But the visions in his dreams did not lie. While awake, he saw these visions as well - but it was in sleep that they truly took hold. One after another, memories and warnings. Past and future. Over and over again...

Dark... FLASH. He was a little boy again, and he had picked up a stick from the fire. The glowing tip was dug into the dirt to quench the flames, and the remaining ember was used to write and draw images in the sky. He liked it here. Surrounded by the wilderness, with his brother sleeping nearby...

FLASH. He was a teenager. In a strange and unfamiliar city - with shackles around his ankles, wrists, and throat. It hurt to breathe. His tongue was dry from thirst, and his feet ached from walking the long distance. He could barely even feel the whips, but hearing them was more than enough to get him moving again...

FLASH. He was a young-adult. His life thus far had been nothing but torture and torment. He was in his cell now, but in minutes, he would be taken before the gentry as sport, to see which one of them - if any - cared to take him to bed. He was both a slave of labor, AND pleasure, due to his looks. His anger threatened to blind him, but he could not let it.

FLASH. Running. Escaping. He had to make it to the underground. To the passage he and his friend had discovered so many years prior. His right side throbbed from the bite, and the dogs were closing in. He plunged into total darkness.

FLASH. Water. He was in the water now. Water up to his ears, his eyes, over his head. He knew what he had to do, and he let go. He felt water seep inside him, and did not fight. Blackness overcame him.

FLASH. He was again a child - but in this life - and again he was faced with water as black and deep as the chasm of death itself. He stepped forward, into the swirling abyss, and spoke something which could not quite be made out. His eyes glowed, and he screamed. Blackness.

Ean woke with a start. He was back in control, and he knew it. Nishin had fled in terror of the dreams, and he was back in command of his own body. His own mind. And he knew what he had to do. Rising, he pulled on a jacket over his nightclothes, and slipped boots onto his feet. Into the night he stole, a dark shadow beginning to solidify behind him, into a black ferret - the embodiment of his brother. He was back in control - and there were things he had to do before the next day dawned...  

[Juridian Soul]

Beyond Believability, Through Reality

It had started early last night. Ean's dreams had been getting stranger and stranger - reality starting to become fantasy... and vice versa. It scared him. But he didn't tell Ben, and he didn't make any attempt to try and stop the dreams. Something in him was telling him to let them come - no matter how much he wished they wouldn't. Nishin had been quiet those last few days before the troubles began. Quiet, as if he were plotting and scheming - which had been very likely in Ean's mind. Nothing could have prepared him for the first step into that world, though... When he left the realm of possibility, and stepped into the Alter Darkness - a world of sin, suffering, and of chaos. But that was later. The first thing to happen had been his dreams, as said before. Dreams of darkness and terror. Of screams so primal they could freeze your blood, and of visions best left in Gothic fairytales. But that was not what had happened. More and more, he had started to have these dreams while awake. Something was screaming to be released, and he had been starting to do that - unknown to him. Something that, to its very core self, was fear and hate. Something that could not be fought with swords or sorcery. A demon with a presence worse than Nishin, and a desire much stronger. Bloodthirsty and hungry, it had chased him through dreams. Until he'd found the gate.
As he now walked down that dark road, he remembered finding the gate. It had been concealed well - deep among his uncle Maverick's possessions. That had been a mistake, going into Maverick's room without his permission. But he had found the gate there nonetheless. At first glance, it had appeared nothing more than a mirror. A dark mirror, and a little creepy, but a mirror nonetheless. Ean's hands had been all over it, toddler that he was, and somehow... he'd activated the gate. He still remembered the feeling of unbridled anger that had tugged at him and, eventually pulled him into, the Alter Darkness. The fear he had felt floating there near oblivion, and the relief turned to terror as the Void had parted, and he was set upon this path he now walked on.
The Void had changed him. It had burned away his innocence with hands of searing agony. It had chased away all childhood dreams, and molded his form to meet its own desires. Once it had done that, it had left him here. The angry Void wanted him to do something in this dark and forsaken world. He had no choice but to obey. So here he was, on his way down the winding path, deeper into the moonlit eternal night. On an errand whose purpose he didn't understand, for an entity he feared.


Ean snapped out of his bitter recollections, and stared ahead at the scenery before him. Darkness against darkness. Grays on black. Even the light of the moon lent the place an eerie quality that was only seen in nightmares. In this nightmare, he was wide awake, and he was the bait to a greater evil than the one who had sent him here. The Void had sent him, and so he must complete his task. To travel to the shadowed mountains far in the distance, and steal from there a key that would both grant the Void power to return to its true state, and show him the way back home. He found himself wondering if Maverick had gone through the same thing when he found this gate to begin with.
The child had come to accept his new body gracefully. Child no longer, he walked in the shoes of a full-fledged teenager. A form that the Void had forced him into, in order to be able to fully comprehend, and to undertake, the task. Looking up again at the mountains was an exercise in futility. They seemed so impossibly far away. He'd reach them eventually, but it was going to take forever. But the Void had told him there was nothing to fear for the passage of time. When he found the key, and returned it to the Void, it would send him back to the exact moment he had come into the gate in the first place. Changed, yes - but the same moment. Not for the first time did Ean find himself wondering how the hell he was going to explain this to his dear father. Without a doubt, this had to be the strangest, freakiest, most bizarre thing that had happened to him in the long course of his life. A life that he now remembered both parts of.
What was even stranger was that Nishin seemed to have left him. But Ean knew that, because the Void had changed him, Nishin had grown more powerful. He was probably assuming a full form on the other side of the gate, and would be waiting for Ean when he returned from this journey. The thought was both joyous and sobering. For he remembered what he had done to his brother in the life before, and he knew that Nishin still remembered too. But that was not a thought for now.
Now, his task was to continue down the path towards the mountains. Soon, it would be sunrise. Ean dreaded seeing what sort of people actually LIVED in this hellish place. But the Void had told him to stop at the first town he came to, and that was fast approaching. He could see the tips of the buildings as he rounded another long bend, moving ever-forward. The buildings were deformed and creepy just like the landscape. As he got closer, he could see all manner of creatures moving to and fro, from building to building. Giant one-eyed monsters, smallish furry ones, human-sized people that appeared human to the naked eye... Ean knew, however, that he had to be careful. Everyone living here was a monster. A monster that would just as soon he never reach those mountains.
When he set foot into the village square, everyone stopped moving, and turned to stare at him. Eyes of yellow and red followed his every footstep, and he tried to look unconcerned. Inside, his heart was doing around 130 in a 65 zone, somewhere in the vicinity of his throat. His pounding heart aside, he knew the monsters could taste fear. So he tried his hardest to hide the fact that he was almost literally shaking in his boots. Day was the equivalent of night here, and he had to find a place to rest. It was a good thing that the Void had left him with a good deal of currency. He paid for a room at the Inn, and retreated into it, not answering the door, not eating a thing, and not meeting anyone's eyes. He needed to figure out what to do next. But for now, he slept. There was one good thing about this place.... In a world of waking nightmare... you don't dream...  

[Juridian Soul]

The Denizens Of The Alter Darkness

When Ean awoke, it was already daylight. Or as 'day' as this place appeared to get. The morning was damp, as it had been raining, and looked like it was going to rain some more. The tension in the air was almost palpable - he didn't think he'd felt this terrified in his life. Regardless, he had to press on. The boy was hard-pressed to find anything good to say about this land that he'd been sucked into. But one of the more pressing matters was getting out of this town alive.
From the moment he'd set foot in this creepy place, he'd felt eyes on him. Watching him. Judging him. Trying to figure out who he was and where he'd come from. Shadowy figures moved in the corner of his vision, and he heard voices where no voices were to be heard. It was like stepping into a ghost movie, and being the protagonist. Somehow, he'd always liked those movies. Now that he was living one, however, he wasn't so keen to be agreeable to his situation. Especially since the Void had told him that if he died here.... He would never return home.
Dying, unfortunately, seemed of little concern to the people who milled about inside the Inn's bar. Ean went down to get a drink before he moved on. Poison or not [and he had a feeling not] he was thirsty, and dehydration was one thing he did NOT want to worry about dealing with. Aside from that, he was also curious as to what secrets this town held. Ever the curious, he started to explore. If he really didn't have to worry about the passage of time, there would be no reason to hurry. He had to have his wits about him, and to do that he had to know more about the place into which he'd been so rudely thrown. It was a shame, therefore, when he turned up no secrets - no 'skeletons in the closet' so to speak. The last thing he expected to turn up [and the phrase was literal] was a friend.
While going through the closet in his room, he discovered what appeared to be a door in the floor. Opening it revealed, not a secret passage or a portal to somewhere else, but a coffin. Specifically, it showed that the 'door' was actually the lid of the coffin. Ean was almost scared into a grave himself, but as he was going to put back to lid, he felt a hand on his shoulder, and looked up. There was a boy there, behind him, about his age. The boy was blond, with one blue eye, and one green. He seemed to have green markings all over his torso, and wasn't wearing a shirt. He wore a blue necklace, and blue silk pants. The one thing that was NOT normal about this kid... was the fact the Ean could see the chair on the other side of the room right through his middle.
The boy introduced himself as Caspian, and made a reference to some god that Ean had never heard of. He called himself a water-mage, and explained that the only reason he had been awakened, was because he was asleep. The words didn't make sense just then, but Ean was too busy freaking out about meeting a ghost to care. Caspian seemed like a decent person to hang out with, so Ean detailed to him his situation, describing the Void, his previous life, his current one, and his change of appearance upon entering the gate. Caspian explained that this was his world - or a portion of it - and that he could get Ean to those mountains better than anyone here.

"I can get you out alive, and back in one piece." Caspian told him.

Ean laughed. "I'm not going to point out the discrepancy in that sentence as it relates to your current condition."

"I bet you say that to ALL the dead guys."

"You don't sound amused."

"Should I be?" The ghost paused for a moment, and rubbed his chin with his hand. "We should probably start headed out. This part of town isn't real safe come nightfall. I don't know if you realized it, but the creeps come out at night."

Ean blinked. "This whole place is pretty creepy - not just at night. Or so I gather."

Caspian tilted his head a bit. "Something I've got to explain to you. This world is like it is because the people in it are all like me. But it's a dying world. All the magic is being sapped, and there's nothing to replace it. This 'Void' you talk about may very well be the spirit-center of this world... or a piece of it."

Ean nodded. "It sounds like a decent reason that it would send me to get something for it. But the question is... Why me?"

Caspian shrugged, and smirked a little. "I think the better question would be why NOT you. You're the one that discovered this 'gate', and I'm assuming the Void is getting a bit desperate with the way things are at the moment. If I were it, I would have set the task on the first person through the mirror. Which happens to be you."

Ean nodded again - Caspian had a point. But points aside, he was much more concerned with whether or not things were going to turn out okay. What if the Void refused to let him go home? What if he were stuck here forever? These opinions, he didn't voice to his new friend. No sense in worrying the dead. Not that it made any sense that he was even TALKING to the dead. But that was too nuts for his mind to handle right now, and was deftly pushed aside by other, more important, matters. Such as getting out of here. Which brought them back to square one.

"So..." Ean began. "How exactly do you plan on getting us back on the road without being murdered? I get the feeling that I can't just waltz out of here like I would in a normal Inn."

Caspian nodded to this, and sighed. "There are quite a few people around that would like to see you dead. The same people that killed me, when I was in your shoes. Well... Not exactly in your shoes. I was traveling around here to run an errand for one of my teachers. Didn't even see the guy until it was too late."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?"

Another shrug. "Depends. It's the truth, so take it as you will." The ghost yawned. Which was a strange thing in and of itself. "As soon as I get you out of here, and back on the path, I'm going to have to vanish - at least for a while. My current form is starting to wake up. Just take one of my bones with you, and I'll reappear right where you are as soon as the form falls asleep again. Which... judging from its age... shouldn't be too terribly long."

"You're ASKING me to desecrate your skeleton?"

"I guess you could put it that way." Caspian laughed. "Just choose a bone so we can get out of here."

Ean searched through the remains, and found that one of the skeleton's ribs still seemed strong. It took some prying to get it to depart from the body, but once he had it in hand, he slipped it into the hem of his pants, where it poked gently as a constant reminder. Caspian nodded his approval.

"Alright - Leave everything else here. The idea is to make them think you're still in the room. Judging by the vacant looks, I don't think they're smart enough to know otherwise." He motioned to the window. "Meanwhile, we're going out THAT."

Ean moved over, and looked out said window. "Umm... I don't know about you, Caspian... but I can't fly. This window is three stories up, and I don't feel like walking away from this with a broken ANYTHING."

The ghost shook his head. "Don't worry about that. The distance is an illusion produced by the remaining power of the spelled glass in the frame. Push open the window, and you'll see."

Ean did as bade, and found Caspian to be telling the truth. The window was ground-level... though Ean couldn't imagine what would make the constructors of this Inn want customers to think differently. He shoved that pondering into the back of his mind, and started out the window, sneaking as quickly as he dared away from the Inn and the town itself.
Soon enough, he was back on the path, and headed towards the mountains once more. Caspian seemed to be tied to his bone, for he didn't leave Ean's side until he let out a soft gasp - simply vanishing into thin air. The silver-haired teen supposed that he had probably returned to the other form when it woke up. Whatever the heck that meant. However, he didn't have much time to dwell over his new friend's sudden departure. There was little time to do anything more than press onward. Even into the falling of night, he walked, hour after hour. Knowing that this world was laden with dying magic... didn't exactly make it easy to sleep. He found himself wishing for the company of Caspian again. Even thought he knew that the ghost would be back - he was unsure exactly when.
He didn't have much longer to wait, thankfully. Caspian appeared within about forty minutes of Ean's starting to get ready to camp. With the help of the ghost-mage, the work went more smoothly than it would have, had Caspian not been with him. Camp was set and ready within minutes - instead of hours, letting the ghost and himself have plenty of time to talk around the roaring fire. It was about then that Ean started to realize something. This was the most fun he'd ever had in his life.
The night was growing long by the time the two said goodnight. As Caspian didn't exactly sleep, he promised to stay as long as he could to make sure that Ean COULD rest without having to fear anything out there. True to his word, the ghost hovered nearby as Ean slid off into fitful sleep, awoken time and time again by visions of shadowy figures, tall mountains, and golden chalices that ran over with blood.  

[Juridian Soul]

The Last Full Moon

Ean dreamed that night. He dreamed of the Void, of his past life. Of anything and everything. His thoughts were consumed by the dreams, so he had time to think of nothing else. Much less time to actually sleep. When he woke in the morning [or rather, evening in this place] he was still rather tired, and had to force himself out of bed. It wasn't surprising that Caspian was gone, and he didn't feel like he'd been abandoned or anything. If Cas had to go somewhere, then he had to go, and there was really no reason for him to stick around. Plus, Ean had no desire to make him do so.
He packed up his things, and 'tore down' camp fairly quickly, taking even less time to put out the fire he'd been using to cook breakfast, and start on his way again. He felt... a bit strange. Those dreams had only been dreams, but his body was sore, as though he'd really been fighting. And he was even MORE tired than when he went to sleep. That didn't matter much, though - he had to keep moving, he HAD to get to those mountains before the full moon. Which was, he judged, about five days away. The mountains were considerably closer now, and they were starting to show their true size. Ean should reach them at the end of the week, or - if he walked on through the day - the beginning of the next night. He chose the wearier, but quicker path, and ended up marching all through the night, and through the day. Before the next night dawned, he was at the base of the mountains, and looking up at their towering heights. He had to get to the top. There were paths that already ran through the jagged cliffs, but he knew he'd find no rest the moment he set foot on them. So he camped at the base of the mountain, and slept away that entire night and day, before waking up to the face of the waning gibbous, and starting the arduous journey up to the top.
The slope was steep, and the going rough. More than a few times, he cut his hand or his leg on a misstep or on a rock that he thought wasn't going to be there. Shadows played in and out of the corner of his vision. To look at them, he would have had to stop. Stopping was not an option. Further still he climbed, and further. The ground below was starting to fade away into so much fog. It took him a moment to realize that this fading was LITERAL. When he dropped a rock down the cliff's edge, once he had scaled it halfway, it vanished the moment it touched the base of what appeared to be fog. And he heard no sound. Panic made him climb faster for about an hour, until he was well out of range of that emptiness.
Now that he was almost at the top, he could see a small temple that waited up there, and a path which led to it. Caspian had not again made an appearance, which gave Ean the sinking suspicion that he was on his own for the rest of this journey. He found himself realizing that it really didn't matter anymore. He was almost home-free, and whatever he had to do in that temple couldn't be as bad as what he'd already had to endure, through the forests, his limbs aching, no food, sparse water, little rest. He was exhausted, and he just wanted this journey to end.
He neared the temple, and slid inside. The walls were covered in onyx and ruby, giving the effect of blood on black silk. An eerie, if not effective, way to show the power of the individual whose worship was or had been performed here. He could see the sky from the middle of the temple, and he looked up. It was the full moon. It seemed a quiet and a sorrowful moon, cloudless night and chill in the air. He didn't want to disturb whatever power slept here, but he knew he must. Although he didn't know what he was supposed to get, as the Void had never told him such. It was his luck, therefore, that brought him to the temple's altar, whereon sat a small figured carved of black stone. His fingers curled around the warm sculpture, and a shock ran through him, as though he'd been electrocuted. He found himself on the floor, reality fading through flashes of dark. Before long, he was unconscious on the floor. But while in this state, he dreamed...

"It is about time you showed up. I was beginning to think that the Darkness had lost his touch."

The voice was feminine, and as Ean looked up, he saw that he was on the floor in the temple... only... it wasn't the temple anymore. It was a palace. Things had a dullness to them here. Like washed-out colors on a canvas. Oddly enough, it didn't seem to bother him. In fact, he felt it quite normal - almost nostalgic. He spoke to the woman with a voice not his own, and suddenly understood the whole reason for his mission. He was to act as a medium for the Void, and whatever... this creature... was....

"I do not come with happiness in my heart, Lucatia. You are making things very difficult for me."

The woman, apparently Lucatia, laughed, and ran her finger along the top edge of the glass of wine... or was it blood?... that she was drinking.

"Ahh, but big brother. Surely you would let me have my fun? Or else you would have come here directly, and not employed such a... handsome medium to do your dirty work. That was quite cruel you know."

"And quite necessary. I cannot have you destroying my home while I am about and visiting you. This world belongs to ME, Lucatia. Not you. Therefore, it is not your place to set up a temple of worship - NOR to strike down the citizens of the Alter Darkness on your whim. This world, this chaotic, dark world, is mine. It is the only thing father left me with - you know this."

"And yet, I don't care." She took a sip of her drink, and set it down on the arm of the throne she was seated in. "It pleases me to have you suffer, big brother. To suffer as I have these past years. Do you realize what it's like being locked up in darkness with no escape? No, of course you don't. You're the one that put me there."

"FATHER put you there, sister. Not I. I have been trying to free you since those chains were put upon you. Don't make me regret my kindness, or my effort, thusfar."

"Kindness? Feh. You speak as though you had some stock in my welfare, brother. Or as if you cared."

"I DO care." At this point, Ean moved forward so that Lucatia's hands were in his. He looked deep into her eyes. "I DO care, and I don't want to see you hurt."

"That is where we differ. I would like nothing better than to see you writhing in pain. It gives me great pleasure."

Ean sighed, and backed off, looking away, out onto a fast-vanishing landscape.

"You always were the darker of us. It doesn't make much sense to me why father did not let you have the position I now hold. I would give it to you if I thought it would let me."

Lucatia laughed, and shook back her long, red hair.

"Brother, your sentiment makes me sick. It also amuses me. Very well. I will stop the destruction of your plane, and send this brat home. But don't think this little quarrel of ours is over just because I show some mercy. You are still priority numero uno on my list, big bro."

Ean nodded, and felt himself smiling lightly. "You will not regret this kindness, sister. I will see to that."

"Oh, go boil your head."

"Thank you, sister."

"Get OUT of here."

With that, Ean turned, and 'walked' out into the nothingness, that then reformed at his touch. He was walking on air, across the way that he had traveled, only much faster, and much more accurately. He reached the Void again in no time. The castle he was in was pitch black. There was no light save for a few flickering torches on the walls, and even THEY gave poor illumination. It seemed more a dungeon than a palace. Standing, he started to walk toward what he knew as the throne-room. Then... he woke up....  

[Juridian Soul]

"I Shall Give You New Life, You Shall Be Reborn."

Ean's eyes opened. He found himself staring at the ceiling. A ceiling which looked awfully familiar. Pushing himself up proved to be not too much of a challenge, though he felt a little light-headed, and more than a little confused. Where was he? After his eyes had adjusted to the darkness, he realized that he was back home. Next to the mirror... and a teenager. He held his hands up before him in sheer wonder. The mirror beside him had deactivated again, and had gone sheet-white. No use as a mirror OR a portal now. Ean stood on unsteady legs, and took in the sights around him.
He was in what he now knew was probably an attic. Not someone's room. Maverick's stuff was here alright, but it was not, as Ean had thought when smaller, where he'd lived, worked, and slept. He'd add 'played' to that, but he didn't think his uncle had ever participated in that sort of activity. Ean also realized in that moment that he was stark naked. The metamorphosis his body had undergone had torn his toddler-clothes to shreds. All that was left of his shirt was a single, tight, band of cloth around his waist, and a loincloth-like pantleg over his more sensitive area. He blushed, and quickly started going through boxes, looking for appropriate clothing. He found what he thought he should wear. It was one of his uncles' old uniforms, though it seemed almost tailor-made for him to wear. The top was black, with red seams, and silver buttons down the front. It was long-sleeved as well, so it hid the numerous scratches he'd received walking through that dreamland forest. The bottoms were of a similar style, black with red seams. In the box, he also found a dagger in a sheath, which he strapped to his side, and a pair of soft black boots, which he pulled on.
He found a regular mirror, and had a glance at himself within its depths. If he had not been the bearer of this body, he might not have recognized himself. His hair had grown long - almost down to his waist. His eyes had deepened to a brilliant, fiery orange, almost neon. His skin had gone even paler, and his wings had started to grow back from where the scientist yanked them off. Except for his head-wing. That was gone, and smooth skin bridged what had been a raw wound. He lifted his hand up to stroke that, and found himself amazed that there was no pain. His wings were skeletal. Only the bones had regrown. Feathers had yet to appear, and perhaps they never would. But the wings had regrown to the extend of the skeleton. It was, he supposed, just another perk of the magic that had grown him. Of course, he reflected on the hole he'd had to slice in the uniform so that his wings weren't pressed painfully tightly to his back. He'd have to explain that later, but he hardly thought that it would be the first thing on his father's mind when he showed up to dinner looking like THIS. He was almost the perfect image of Ben, aside from the major differences. But he looked... somehow older, somehow wiser than his father. That scared him a little. But wait until Aure saw this! She'd flip her lid! And now, he was old enough to... But that would come later. If he even WANTED to. Somehow, the word 'girl' just brought up the face of that evil goddess, and made him shudder at the thought. When the time came, it would come. He knew that much for a fact.
He straightened his attire, and stretched out to get the kinks from his bones. Well... it was now or never again. He didn't want to SCARE his father, but there had to be something there that would recognize Ean amidst all this change. With that thought in mind, he slid off to dinner, which he knew would be being served around this time. Hopefully, the love between them as father and son would be enough to stop Ben from hurting him. And enough to have him recognize who he was.  

[Juridian Soul]

Dear Journal,

I almost had a heart-attack today. Ean is... well, I was expecting him to grow, let's say... but NOT this much. He came downstairs wearing Erik's old Akiiri uniform, and I just about quite literally died. He didn't realize that the uniform was one of an assassin, but once I told him [after I had calmed down considerably] he didn't bother to take it off, saying that the colors looked good on him. I have to agree, really. Black and red DO seem to suit him. His bone-wings look painful. He said that they ache a little, and I gave him some painkiller. I'll have Dragon come and take a look at him... but he's not going to believe what he sees. I brushed Ean's long hair a couple of times as he was drifting off to sleep. It feels luxurious, and it's making ME wish I had silver hair like that. It has to be almost down to his waist. Maybe a couple centimeters shy of it. I think he's got to be one of the sweetest teens I know. Probably stemming from the fact that he just jumped from toddler to teen. He hasn't had time to live through the angst of childhood. He'll get there though. I'm just glad I have my Ean back. When I couldn't find him.... I thought he'd run away. I'm just glad he's safe, sound, alive, and happy.

... and apparently has the appetite of a horse.

- Benvolio Arrikanez  

[Juridian Soul]

A Bittersweet Reunion [With Aurelius] [Here]

Dear Journal,

Ean here. It's been a while since I saw Aure, and there was a lot about her... well, him... that I didn't recognize. One of them being that SHE was now a HE. Just what did I do to deserve that kind of torment? Some god somewhere is laughing at me, I just know it... Regardless, we talked. And I explained my illness. Which - now - is thankfully cured by one of Dragon's remedies. I heard, recently, that a few of my family had this disease. I wonder if it's contagious. I hope I didn't give it to him. If I did, I don't know what I'd do with myself...
I've been seriously thinking about this - about how I feel about Aurelius. There are mixed feelings there. In this form, he is sexy to me. I actually WANT to jump him and... well, you get the picture. Unfortunately enough... When she's in her real form, something about sleeping with her repulses me. I guess that's the price I pay for liking my own gender. After he left, I thought about something, and I don't remember what it was. But it drove me to draw a blade across my arm. The wound didn't bleed much, but DAMN it felt good. Why? There must be something seriously wrong with me. Maybe that fever scrambled my brain, I dunno. But it felt good, and... well... I wanted to take it further. I don't understand! I don't WANT to die, but... I guess I'm just nuts or something. It'll probably pass.

- Ean  

[Juridian Soul]

Looking To Change...

After the illness. Ean had sought a new lease on a nowhere-life. Aurelius was beyond his reach now - almost an adult, and with no interest in him. Besides... he had no wish to relate with girls in that manner at all. But he had, of late, grown very lonely. Sure, the creature he was caring for at the moment alleviated that to some degree, but loneliness still ate at him like a festering sore, and it made him spend many a night in bed with tears streaming down his cheeks. Crying. The ache wouldn't have been so bad, had he been completely alone. But no - with the passing of the illness, his brother's presence had grown stronger and stronger within the back of his mind. He was prone to telling the AIR to shut up, because his brother would not. People would look at him askance, or get up quickly and walk away. Some even ushered children out of his way so fast you'd think he was some sort of horrible serpent. But that's the way people were toward him, and that's the way they always had been.
He had tried slipping back into Rhyme-tongue... but all that did was bring back terrible memories of a time he'd rather just forget. So he shelved that past behind him in such a manner as to never draw it out again. Instead, he threw himself to the books. And stumbled upon something in the library [which Dragon had kindly provided him] that caught his interest. Medicine. Now - it had been said that earlier he had held an interest in it... but as a child, he could never have hoped to keep that interest alive. Now, though, as a teenager, the interest had grown again, and this time, he clung to it.
It was in the library, reading a book on cardiology [The Heart: A Study] when he heard a knock on the door. Since Ean lived alone now, he was not expecting anyone... but when he opened the door, he found what seemed to be one of his uncles standing in the heat outside, looking like he would very much like to escape it.

"Ean, is it? Uncle Ben's told me a lot about you. Including the fact that you live out here by yourself."

Wait a minute... UNCLE Ben? Not just Ben? Ean's eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Who are you."

The boy at the door sighed, and crossed his arms.

"The name's Solo. Can you please let me in? It's sweltering out here."

Ean did so, and Solo walked into the place, taking off the jean jacket he'd had on, and tossing it over a couch. The irritated Illu growled something under his breath, locked the door, and hung the coat on the appropriate peg in the closet before rounding on his guest.

"Just who ARE you, Solo? Do I know you?"

Solo laughed, and scrubbed a hand through his brownish hair.

"No - at least, not yet. But I'm technically your cousin, so you should. Dad sent me down here to see if you were okay. What with you just getting over being so sick and all."

"... I'm fine. Your dad is Dragon, isn't he?"

The guess proved to be in the right, as Solo nodded, sighed, and found a seat on the couch where he had tossed his jacket earlier. Ean joined him shortly after, bringing the book he'd been reading, and a glass of water for his guest and himself. Solo looked across at him, and sipped at the water, then looked down at the book, and smirked.

"One could almost say you guessed my intent. I mean - Draco DID send me here. But I didn't have to come. I came for something else. I figured you pulled down a few of dad's professional books when I heard he gave you half his library."

Ean looked down at the cardiology book, took a sip of water himself, and shrugged.

"Yes, and?"

"Stirred up interest, didn't it?" Solo's eyes sparkled at bit as he spoke. "Now, I'm not a stellar doctor like my dad - but I can put you in touch with someone that is. Someone that dad's lost contact with. Well, purposely lost contact with. Have you ever heard of Dr. Kellen Alabaster Reisan?"

Ean blinked, looked down at the book that he was reading. Dr. Reisan was the author of said book. The Illu's face went pale as he realized this, but it was from excitement, not fear. Solo went on.

"Mmmhmm. He's the one that wrote that book. As well as about a fourth more of that library. He's married now to some sweet woman. Which is why he changed his name. But he and I both keep contact with one another here and there. We know each other quite well, and he wanted to know if YOU wanted some help in learning the stuff. Of course, he'd come and talk to you himself - but he's on a last-minute late-night call, and can't make it. So... what do you say?"

Ean took another drink of water, and rose from the couch, pacing. He tended to do that, as it was a fairly bad habit he had of trying to make up his mind.

"You say Dr. Reisan will take me on as his student?"

"PERSONAL student. One-on-one attention. That is, if you feel like learning that way. He's got a son, though... so you might have to put up with that brat."

Ean paced some more as he thought. It WOULD be change from his nowhere life. It WOULD be something he was interested in. But board... money... As if he'd guessed what the boy was going to ask, Solo spoke up again.

"Room and board all taken into account. Kel has a spare room upstairs. His old one. You can use that one. And the missus, I've heard, is one hell of a cook."

Ean thought for a few moments more, then bit his lip, and nodded.

"Alright - I'll do it."

Solo grinned, and stood, clapping him on the back.

"Great! I'll tell him when I see him tomorrow. Just look for me again in about a week, and I'll come and get you. But that thing...."

He pointed to Ean's pet.

"Has to go. Kellen's family already has three animals. They'd murder it."

Ean nodded, and pondered something he'd heard. He'd have to write Saga a letter later tonight. With that, though, Solo grabbed his coat from the closet, and beat a quick exit. Ean waved him off, then shut and locked the door as he sat down to think. A new career? No - a new life. Just the change he'd been looking for.  

[Juridian Soul]

Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Journal,

It has been a long while since I thought about life. Truly thought about it. I have been living in constant fear. Constant uncertainty. But is that really what it is? Not too long ago - before I started living completely alone - I wanted to die. I truly, truly wanted to die. And things got worse from there. But now... in a dead-end life with no career... I have been given a chance at redemption. I don't know why... but Aurelius has been on my mind excessively as of late. I dream about her. I don't know why. I know she's older now. Wiser. And that saddens me as well as makes me pleased. She finally moved on with the life she wanted... or at least with the life she chased and changed. And me? Stuck here. Dead-ended, as I said before. Doing nothing, and going nowhere. Suddenly, though... this chance... I had never before really thought about studying medicine as a career. Never actually wanted to do it. But the interest grew again over time. And my ramshackle little apartment will soon be no more, as I move into Kellen and his family's house. Kellen - a cousin I barely know. Someone I didn't even know existed until I read his book. And now I'm going to live with him. Why? Perhaps because my life needs to turn around. It needs to swing from nothing to something, and this is probably the best way to do it. By force. It's pretty amazing, how far I've come. But I still have a long way to go. And a lot to do. To turn my life around. And by amazing... I don't mean good. My life is nothing right now. I've got to get it back on track. And perhaps a doctor is what I'm meant to be? We'll have to see.

- Ean