Dating

[PoeticVengeance]

Kain Wynd

Why is it that the only love spells people seem to think about are those that enchant a person to make them fall in love with someone they wouldn't normally?

There are different kinds of love spells, people.

There are some that help two people already in a relationship grow closer, there are some that help to put two people in the right place at the right time to meet each other, and there are some that help two people who already know each other and want to be with each other remove obstacles from their being together.

Love spells don't just force a person to love another against their will.

Love spells, do indeed work.

Hell love spells is merely a blanket term for any usage of magic that causes a sexual/romantic relationship to occur more quickly or more smoothly then without the usage of the spell in the same conditions.

It can be anything from a little glamour to make you look better, to a mind touch to make the person more open to others, or even a little hormonal boost to raise the sex drive.

It isn't always a mind raping will breaker. In fact those a rare in the love spell area.  

[Kain Wynd]

missmagpie

Kain Wynd

Dear, you sound bitter.

Please don't patronise me. Thanks. biggrin

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No, you can't quantify love and put it in a box and label it, but people do know who they're attracted to, and they hope that person likes them, too. It's immature, but it's how relationships happen.

It is indeed how relationships begin. That doesn't mean it's what keeps them together.

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But for those that are open to love from everywhere, they know that it may come in any form.

Oh I hope not! I'd hate to fall in love with a slug! xp

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But the truth remains, you only love (in the sense of two people being together emotionally) who you're attracted to.

Yes. Again, that is extremely true. I never said it wasn't. I just said it isn't necessarily nice, or a good thing.

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As far as Romeo and Juliet, the two loved each other so much that they were willing to die for each other. Putting yoursel;f out there, and making yourself available to feel is the point. The fact that you took the risk of pain to be with a person, says something about how you feel about that person.

Yes, it does. It means I was in love. In love enough to allow myself to be continuously destroyed. Is that really something anyone should strive for? And I know that comes off as bitter but I've been controlling this for quite some time. I'm a lot stronger now than I was. This is a cautionary post just to remind people that things aren't necessarily that great. Things can definately go very, very wrong.

Love is incredibly powerful. It can make people do the most insane things. It can reduce the highest people to the smallest wrecks, and the smallest people into kings. That's not exactly something to be messed with, or really sought for. I mean, how do you know what's going to happen to you? Which way is it going to go? Being closed off to love when you need to be is not a terrible sin. It's a rather careful move to allow yourself space to recuperate.

I'm not saying people shouldn't fall in love. Hell, I wouldn't be here if my parents hadn't. Just be careful what you wish for. It may damn well come true.

Dear, I'm not patronizing. You are bitter. You're also not very adventurous. You're also a worrywort, with clearly some apocalyptic theory that I really think it's about time you let go of, because it doesn't serve you.

Close your self off to love if you want to be, but when you're the lonely cat lady, don't cry about how you didn't fall in love. And if you're strong enough, and know your self, then you won't have to be afraid of love. That's all right. It's going to happen to you, too.  

[Kain Wynd]

phantomkitsune

Kain Wynd

Why is it that the only love spells people seem to think about are those that enchant a person to make them fall in love with someone they wouldn't normally?

Because those are the ones that are heard about most, and those are the sort I've had to deal with.

Kain Wynd

There are different kinds of love spells, people.

There are some that help two people already in a relationship grow closer, there are some that help to put two people in the right place at the right time to meet each other, and there are some that help two people who already know each other and want to be with each other remove obstacles from their being together.

Those can't be qualified exclusively as love spells, though. Searching for something is far different from coercing it. Few people who've approached me about love spells want to wait, or to look.

Kain Wynd

Love spells don't just force a person to love another against their will.

Love spells, do indeed work.

Love spells of that sort would be lovely.

::sigh::

I know you don't get it right now, but you will soon.  

[Pelta]

The Bookwyrm

I'm opening myself up again, finally, and likely setting myself up for another fall, but it's finally time for me to let myself love someone again. It's taken a long time, and it's taken a lot of me work, but I've worked out a lot of issues I've had that kept attracting the wrong sort of partner. I may attract a new sort of wrong partner, but at least it'll be an evil and I haven't tried before.

Heh. I know that feeling alright. And it's a very similar situation in which you have to take a step back and say, "Wait a minute... Why do I keep dating these shits?" Then once you've sorted out why and how this keeps happening, perhaps then you can have the confidence to go out there and open yourself up again. Once you've been destroyed completely it does take a while.

Kain Wynd

Dear, I'm not patronizing. You are bitter. You're also not very adventurous. You're also a worrywort, with clearly some apocalyptic theory that I really think it's about time you let go of, because it doesn't serve you.

Hun, you don't know a thing about me. Let go of your presumptions because I'm a lot stronger than you think I am. And somehow in the whole two posts you've read of mine you think you've sussed out my entire personality. Are you always this shallow, or is it something you picked up over time?

Please, do not assume that what is right for you is right for everybody. That is the biggest mistake you can make when giving advice. No, I am not you. I am not going to live my life according to the way you think I should because, quite frankly, it isn't right for me. There are individual people and experiences here; applying a blanket cure is not going to work. Sorry that we're not all made the exact same way, but life would be damned boring if we were.

Don't tell me what to think or how to live. It's the most pompous, arrogant thing I've ever heard on this forum.

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Close your self off to love if you want to be, but when you're the lonely cat lady, don't cry about how you didn't fall in love.

I'm allergic to cats.

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And if you're strong enough, and know your self, then you won't have to be afraid of love.

You don't know a thing about abuse, do you?  

[The Bookwyrm]

Okay, guys, I'm calling shenanigans: magpie. Kain. Chill.

Kain, I can see how you're being magpie is taking your responses as patronizing: You're assuming that your experiences and answers are more significant than hers; simply agree to disagree and recognize that horrible experiences in love do tend to take away some of the naivety. If you're entitled to your opinion, she is entitled to hers. You've taken it to a very personal level, and you're starting to insult because you disagree with her and she's not seeing your point.

magpie, don't stoop to his level. Disagree with what he's saying, but don't get personal about it. It's hard when you feel like you're being ragged on for nothing, or having a view imposed on you, but you're simply feeding off each other right now.

So both of you: Let it go. Disagree with the idea, not the person. If you can't play nice, I'll have to lock the thread.  

[Kain Wynd]

The Bookwyrm

Okay, guys, I'm calling shenanigans: magpie. Kain. Chill.

Kain, I can see how you're being magpie is taking your responses as patronizing: You're assuming that your experiences and answers are more significant than hers; simply agree to disagree and recognize that horrible experiences in love do tend to take away some of the naivety. If you're entitled to your opinion, she is entitled to hers. You've taken it to a very personal level, and you're starting to insult because you disagree with her and she's not seeing your point.

magpie, don't stoop to his level. Disagree with what he's saying, but don't get personal about it. It's hard when you feel like you're being ragged on for nothing, or having a view imposed on you, but you're simply feeding off each other right now.

So both of you: Let it go. Disagree with the idea, not the person. If you can't play nice, I'll have to lock the thread.

I can play nice. I play nice all the time.

Clearly, dear, we do both have two entirely different views on the same subject that we feel very strongly about. I've said my piece, and I'm willing to call it a truce. I can see your point of view my dear, and I hope that you can see mine.  

[swampyface]

Going back to the first post...

My boyfriend is Muslim.

He's not even supposed to date me [because of his religion. he isn't supposed to date anyone] but he made a choice. He decided that his need to be with me was stronger than his fear of his consequences.

He never mocks me for my beliefs. We have, however, gotten into a few heated debates about religion. It's hard for him to understand Karma and why I believe in reincarnation.

Likewise, it's hard for me to understand his philosophies.

<3  

[Winter Black]

Does your religion/faith interfere with your love life?
What love life? I haven't had a boyfriend/girlfriend since around August. But no, I don't think it was ever a factor. The biggest problem I have is that I choose people who are fake. For some reason, I can't tell.
Hopefully, this will stop some time soon. But in the meantime, I don't even really go anywhere, so I don't meet people.

Mixed relationships -- good or bad -- for you?
The only problem I had in a mixed relationship (I dated someone who had no religion at all, and a christian, for boys, but I don't think I even brought up the subject of religion with girls) was that the person I was with turned out to be an a*****e.

Love spells?
No one ever asked me to make love spells for them in the way that you've stated. I was once asked to write a love spell to bring love into the life of someone who hadn't dated in three years, but thats such a simple and straightforward request that I couldn't say no.

My biggest problem with dating is that I'm such a huge introvert when I meet someone new that even if they hint at liking me "that way", not only will I not notice, but if I do, I'll assume I'm imagining it. I need to work on that. But I'm so scared of both rejection, and finding I'm with another a*****e, that I just naturally ignore things like that as a defence.
I want to meet someone. I really do. A nice girl or boy who I can be myself with, and snuggle up to. Its not too much to ask, ne? But I can't seem to find it for any number of reasons, including self-sabotage.  

[swampyface]

A couple days ago I posted a response in which I told you of my Muslim boyfriend and how for the past five months, religion has never gotten in the way.

Well, I take that back.

As much as we love each other, he broke up with me on Tuesday because of 'religious differences."

I feel like s**t.  

[Jezehbelle]

I hate it when that happens. ): I'm sorry.  

[StrawberryGumiho]

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Does your religion/faith interfere with your love life?

No. But then I'm not very flashy with it. Its personal. They stay out of mine, I stay out of theirs. No issues.

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Mixed relationships -- good or bad -- for you?

Many, many, many boyfriends later... Never had any problems.

Currently dating a Korean methodist. Very secure in his spirituality. But respectful of mine. He likes to ask questions every now and then... But thats it.

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Love spells?

Could care less.  

[Seira Relur]

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Does your religion/faith interfere with your love life?

It has. There had been people who were interested, but the moment they learned of my faith seemed to shy off. But I figure if they disapprove of my beliefs that much then there's no point wasting my time with them.

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Mixed relationships -- good or bad -- for you?

Well I had one boyfriend that didn't care, and then another boyfriend that said he didn't care but would insult me on it at times. Only once did I date someone with similar faiths. However, it ended because she's vegen and she couldn't stand the fact that I ate meat anway. sweatdrop But I can't help it! It's delicious! (drools at the thought of bacon)

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Love spells?

Not big on them. The closest I've ever done of one was a "get over it" spell for myself, and once for my friend.  

[MOD66]

Does your religion/faith interfere with your love life? It hasn't yet i dated a christian chick but it might because im falling for a guy who's wiccan and if he's fluff it's just going to be more unreqited love for Twack
Mixed relationships -- good or bad -- for you? Depending on the person it might but if im dating a person who thinks paganisumn is completly crazy then no, ƒuck no
Love spells? NO unless they make the person more open to love and they are consentual. Otherwise it's a love slave and that's bad...unless you're into that kinda think xd  

[nightdove]

For me it works, I'm Pagan and my bf is agnostic/atheist (I put both becasue sometimes he's unreligious, and other times he's looking around)...but he gets Paganism and thinks it's awesome that I'm Pagan...whenever I talk to him about it he's interested, because he knows it's a major part of my life......I'd never ask or expect him to convert to Paganism, he could be Catholic for all I care, as long as he accepts me like he always has.  

[Curiously Fruity]

Jezehbelle

I just want a guy I can show this waterfall to, who will enjoy it like I do, or just enjoy it, without complaining that they'd rather be somewhere else. Who'll share my strong disliking of the local deforestation around here and won't say "Can't you feel it's pain" to mock me to his friends.
It's not so much to ask, right? gonk

Honestly, sometimes I feel the same way even though I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. I love being outside (for the most part) and really want to spend time hiking or seeing a great waterfall; but my boyfriend is a very inside-loving person and doesn't like going out in the heat because of certain health issues. It's kind of depressing and slightly annoying.

And since I've decided that I'm not going to be Christian he is frequently calling me a satanist around our friends. I know he doesn't mean it and he just does it to pick on me, but I do understand where you are coming from.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I were with another man who had a similar faith... or one at all.