[$] Not Myself [Avengers rp] (MDaylus)

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Bruce nodded. He knew Tony needed rest to be able to help, but he wondered if getting other magic really would help. Tony’s magic had been effective enough to pull Loki from something very like a coma. But he supposed they could try it so Tony could get his reserves back up. Watching Eir heal Loki’s leg, Bruce smiled. “Thank you very much. We were working on that.” He said slowly. “Did you help Loki when he was pregnant before?” he asked softly.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Eir nodded when Bruce thanked her for healing Loki's leg the way she could. It seemed to be doing better than it had in awhile, she did not know how long he had been working to fix it but it seemed better. When Bruce asked her if she had helped with Loki's pregnancy before she nodded. "With the twins mostly, I examined him once when he conceived Sleepnir but as soon as I told him what it was he ran and did not come back until the child had been born. I think he was scared then what his father would do and because he had not known he could have children. The twins it was much easier to keep track of him because his mother kept tight tabs on his. He could not leave his room without being noticed. I think she worried he would run once more. He should have had a mind healer then too." Eir sighed. She remembered how anxious and jumpy Loki had been then and the closer it got to the birth the more reclusive he became.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Bruce nodded slightly. Loki seemed extremely uneasy when it came to these things. Bruce was sure now that Loki had never and would never have an easy, stress-free pregnancy because of his nerves. “Well any advice and warnings you could give us would be appreciated. I have very little experience with pregnancies and labor. We hope to get another doctor to help, but I know Loki would prefer I handle as much of it as possible.” He said slowly. IT was then that the bifrost opened and Frigga came sweeping toward the mansion, a mix of anxiety, annoyance, and stress.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

"You will want to watch him, towards the end of the pregnancy he becomes quite reserved and avoids others. I had to watch him closely then when he was with the twins, to make sure he got his meals." Eir explained. She remembered threatening Loki with things to get him to eat. "He likes ice, I think that may be his Jotun heritage however. I have heard that on Jotunhiem there is a certain type of ice they eat if they are expecting." Eir continued thoughtfully. She had never put much stock in that rumor until now, combining it with what she knew of Loki. Looking to the door when she sensed her queen arrive. "She is here,"  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Bruce gave a thoughtful hum. He’d already seen how Loki had begun getting picky before he left. If he got more picky there may be problems. But the idea that there might be something unique Jotuns ate made Bruce think. Tony had a way of contacting Loki’s brothers…..perhaps they could work out something to get Loki this ice or whatever it was. Blinking when Eir looked away, it took a minute for Bruce to realize she was talking about Frigga. He couldn’t hold back the breath of relief that came with that knowledge. She had a habit of making things better with her visits.

Frigga was let in by Steve and made her way to the infirmary without any guidance. Coming in, she gave a faint smile to Thor, touching his cheek gently before she moved over to the bed, hand hovering over Loki as she checked on him and the baby, heart swelling and tightening at the confirmation of twins. When she came across Fenrir, she smiled warmly greeting him quietly and carefully picking him up. She pet him for only a moment before handing Fenrir to Thor and slowly sitting on the edge of the bed. Reaching out she slowly began to comb her fingers through Loki’s hair as she carefully looked into his mind, taking a deep breath at what she found. “Oh Loki….” she murmured.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Thor looked up as his mother entered the room giving her a gentle relieved smile. He had been listening to what Eir and Bruce said and it did not sound like it boded well for his brother. Still his mother's presence made him hope for the best. When she handed him Fenrir he nodded and moved to take the pup from the room and to bed knowing that the pup had probably had enough excitement for the day and that there might be more. "His children are strong my queen but they are pulling all his magic from him to feed themselves. I would suggest perhaps your other son help supply some magic to take the strain off of Loki and allow him and the father to build some reserve." Eir spoke gently as Frigga inspected her son.

Loki gave a soft grumble as he felt his mind be invaded for the second time in a short while. Both presences he recognized and percieved no threat but it didn't make him happy. He was soothed by the hand combing through his hair and at his mother's words he stirred and opened his eyes sleepily. "Mother..." Loki breathed before snuggling his face into her leg and a hand wrapping in her dress. It was a move he had done as child when he needed and wanted comfort. Wanted to know that everything was okay or would be okay.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga nodded at Eir’s words. It wouldn’t be easy. Thor had only a very small reserve of magic and it wasn’t like Loki or Tony’s as he wasn’t a magic user. But it could be done, and it should be enough for the babies. Smiling faintly as Loki woke, Frigga let him come closer, continuing to pet his hair. Leaning down, she whispered softly to him in Asgardian. Comforting and reassuring him, reminding him of her love and how pride in him. Very carefully, she pushed a little of her magic into Loki for the babies. Though they needed magic, they seemed sated for the time being, no doubt from finally having Tony’s magic. “We can certainly work out a way for Thor to help. And perhaps we can leave a little of our magic before we leave.” She said looking to Eir. Shifting slightly, she slowly moved her hand to Loki’s leg, slowly mending the wound until it was almost healed. She had always preferred injuries to finish healing on their own. “Though his magic is concerning, his mind is the true problem. He’d recover his magic faster if his mind was at peace.” Frigga said softly.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Eir watched the queen with her son. It was an image she had appreciated as a younger woman. Even with Loki not being her blood the queen had accepted him and cared for him like he was without a doubt. Loki in turn had clung to her like he knew there would be no love from Odin. Even now as an adult he still looked to her for comfort when the world seemed to be falling apart around him. Eir nodded when the queen said that they could certainly get some magic from Thor to give to the children and that perhaps they could give a little magic as well. "The doctor here said there are no true mind healers here on Midgard but that they may be willing to learn if we were to allow one of them to teach them here." Eir spoke when Frigga said that Loki's state of mind was concerning.

Loki breathed deeply but calmly as his mother continued to stroke his hair and moved to speak comforting words to him. It was what he felt like he needed, to know that despite everything it might be okay. He gave a soft sigh as he felt some of her magic enter him, the babies exploring it as soon as it entered him. They latched onto it, something new but similar. The wound being healed made him feel better almost instantly. It meant he could move around again, not that he felt like doing it now. It just meant that he wouldn't have to stay in the antiseptic smelling infirmary. He wasn't really listening as his mother spoke above him even if he was aware of it. He wanted to drift off to sleep again with her there beside him knowing that she could keep him safe at least for a little while. However he felt like he needed to tell her what was going on with his baby, no babies. *Theres two, twins again... I can't do it mother. I don't want to lose them again.* Loki spoke in Asgardian, his voice just barely above a whisper. Like he was afraid that Tony was still there and would protest his want to give up.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga looked to Bruce when Eir explained his offer. “That may be possible….” She said slowly. Mind healing was a long, complicated process without magic to aide, but it seemed like that may be the only option. “We would have to test to see who would be the most suited to learning this art. And a mind healer would have to live here for some time. But if it helps, we may have little choice.” She said carefully. Looking back to Loki when he spoke. Eyes softening, Frigga shook her head. “My dear, sweet boy….” She murmured. “Why would you think that?” she asked gently. “Why would you think you’d lose them?”
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Eir nodded when the queen said that they would need to test whoever wished to learn the art of mind healing. She would help in any way that she could to test those that wished to learn and evaluate which healer she should send down to Midgard. She looked to Loki as the godling spoke shaking her head. *No one wants them, no one ever does. He says he'll protect them but he doesn't want them. Does he know how cursed I am? How cursed they are?* He questioned tears welling in his eyes. Not one of those that had fathered his children wanted them, he was destined to be alone he decided. *Midgard gives away children they do not want, if Tony does not do that... Then Thanos has said he will take them. As soon as they are born they will be taken from me.* he sobbed.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga blinked at Loki’s words and sighed. “Eir, perhaps you should take Bruce and out young friend out and explain to the others living here about mind healing, see if you can find two or three that have some of the attributes needed.” Frigga said softly. “Skadi, would you kindly wait outside.” She added gently. Waiting for the others to leave, Frigga turned her attention back to Loki and switching to Asgardian. “Loki, I swear to you, Thanos will not have your children. The entirety of Asgard’s army will have to be destroyed before that happens. And I imagine that many of those you have come to know on Midgard would stand in the way as well. You will not have these children taken from you.” Frigga promised. “And if Tony said he would protect the children, it doesn’t sound like he would want to get rid of them. He can’t protect them very well without them close.” Slowly taking a section of Loki’s hair, she began to make a thin, complicated braid, something she’d done often enough when Loki was young and talking to her like this. “As for Tony…..have you actually asked him if he wanted the children? Has he said he wanted or didn’t want them in those words?” she asked slowly. “Or are you reading into him?” Meeting Loki’s eyes, she gave him a serious look. “My dear, you don’t have the most spotless track record when anticipating people, and Tony seems to be complicated in his opinions and reactions. And he loves you. He loves you so much, people could tell stories about it. You aren’t cursed, and your children aren’t cursed, and even if you were, it wouldn’t matter to him.” Frigga murmured. Carefully taking Loki’s hand, she put it on his stomach and reached her magic out through his hand so he could sense his children like she could, feel how strong and healthy they were. “Don’t give up on this chance Loki."
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Eir and Skadi frowned at Loki's words. Eir because it gave her insight into how much the damage to Loki's mind was affecting him and Skadi because he had never really seen his prince in such a state. Loki before everyone but his mother had always tried to be the prince everyone expected. Eir nodded when Frigga asked her to take everyone away and get started on finding those that might be susceptible to the training. Skadi nodded when asked to wait outside and ushered everyone out of the room. Loki flushed in embarrassment and shame when he heard his mother speak to the other's just then realizing they were there. Loki looked to his mother when she spoke proclaiming that Thanos would have to kill all of Asgard's army to take Loki's children from him. *He could make me give them up, just like what happened with the gauntlet. I could not remember giving my children away and I can't pretend to keep him from my mind now mother.* Loki argued. Loki wanted to continue to argue when his mother continued on to Tony. Sometimes taking ones children away would be protecting them, Loki had no doubt that might be the case with him. *He has said nothing about the children one way or the other. When we got into a fight over Fenrir he didn't try to stop me when I threatened to leave and get myself injured and endanger the child, children.* he amended. He didn't want to admit that it was possible he was reading into Tony from everything in the past. A scowl graced his face when his mother said that he didn't have a spotless track record when anticipating people. No, he didn't which is why he just doubted them now, doubted any possible seeming good intention. *I ruined that love...* he growled suddenly angry with himself and ignoring his mother's words that he and his children were not cursed. He started to remember everything he had seen or heard whilst in Alaska. His mother drew him from his thoughts before he could spiral through them and become more and more dark. He looked to his stomach when his mother placed her hand over his on his stomach. He gave a soft gasp when he could feel his children there and how strong and healthy they were. It was something he had worried about endlessly while in Alaska and his magic had dwindled. Tears fled from his eyes and he sobbed in defeat. He didn't want to fight everything so hard, but he wanted his children to be okay. Wanted them to have a life that was full of happiness. He wanted Tony to hold him like he had before he had ruined everything and tell him it was alright.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga let Loki reply to her words, even let him use a tone with her. She knew Loki was on the brink and just needed to get some of this out. Expecting the tears to finally fall when she showed Loki his children, Frigga let Loki see them a moment longer before she shifted, pillowing Loki’s head in her lap and just letting him cry for a time, going back to the braid she was working on. “Loki….the only thing you can do to fix any of this is to sit and talk to Tony. Actually spend time with him, tell him what you’re concerned about and ask him the questions you need to ask. And understand that it may take many conversations over several days.” She said gently. “Tony is strange, even for a Midgardian, you know this, and it’s part of the reason you love him. He is one of the smartest people I have ever encountered, yet he understands so little about people, and about how things are meant to be between people. He made a mistake when he let you go. I’m sure some part of you can see that. If he didn’t care about you and the babies, if he didn’t love you, he wouldn’t be so upset now, he wouldn’t be in the state he is in.” she said, finishing the braid and gently letting it settle against the rest of Loki’s hair. “And I think you may have less to fear from Thanos soon. You need help Loki. You have such a strong mind my dear, but you need help setting it straight again. If one of your friends helped you with mind healing, would you let them?” she asked gently.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki was glad when his mother let him see his children for a few moments longer before allowing him to lay his head in her lap. Normally he would have protested soiling her dress but for the moment he just wanted the comfort she could offer. He listened to her tell him how he could fix the situation but felt hopeless almost at once. How was he to sit and talk with Tony when he couldn't speak anything but the language he had learned as a child. Tony didn't understand him and even speaking through their bond was hard when all he could do was throw emotions and memories at the man. *can't talk with him...* Loki breathed through his crying. At the mention of Tony making a mistake when he had let Loki go the god shook his head. He wasn't sure Tony had made a mistake... why would the man want him, why had he wanted him? *The state hes in now because of me needing his magic, I stole it from him.* Loki argued. Everything was so tiring, so hard now but he grew confused when his mother said that she thought he would have less to fear from Thanos soon. He was even more confused when she asked if one of his friends helped him with mind healing if he would let him. *They are not mind healers and even if they were they would see everything in my mind mother. Everything... why would they fix me then?* he asked. He thought they'd just as soon lock him up then fix him.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga gave a little hum. “you can’t talk to him at the moment, no. But you can spend time with him. You can make him see you still love him, you still want him to be in your life. You’re all-speak will come back as you are able to store more magic. Between Tony’s magic, what Eir and I are hoping to do before we leave, and Bruce’s care, you shouldn’t be without your all-speak for too long.” She said softly. “And you didn’t steal his magic, the babies need it, they’re part human and Tony’s magic is unique, unlike ours. It may be that they will need to take some of his magic to continue to grow and develop.” Letting Loki voice his confusion, Frigga shook her head. “We can send someone to teach them mind healing.” She explained. “And it seems that you have a rather poor opinion of your friends. They care for you. There has never been a thing to suggest that they don’t. And they all have demons in their past, they all have seen darkness. They will not think less of you. IN fact they may least likely people in all of the realms to judge you.”