[$] Not Myself [Avengers rp] (MDaylus)

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Green eyes held an unsure gaze as Loki watched Frigga. Hearing her still call him her son despite not truly being hers and everything else made him feel a bit of joy. Watching her clean the ground with a bit of magic he recognized finally allowed a soft smile to grace his face. He couldn't not remember all that she had taught him. He was so lost in those fond memories that he did not see Tony usher the warriors from the room and be forced to stay himself.

Looking up to his mother as she began to explain the events of the past. Hearing the confirmation of him being born after Frigga and Odin had been married and after Thor had been born hurt. It was after those words that Thor set beside him settling a large hand on the smaller god's shoulder in a form of comfort. The blond did not know what his mother was going to tell them but it mattered not because nothing would change the fact that Loki was still his brother both in blood and without blood. Looking to Thor, Loki gave a soft look not quite a smile because he was still angry that the blond had hidden so much from him but he allowed the offered comfort.

He knew that he was smaller than all other Jotun's but he hadn't thought that he might have never been able to survive because he had not been born with all the needed traits. Frigga continuing to say that she had been angry when she had found out that he was in the palace caused Loki's shoulders to sink. She however soothed that hurt quickly when she stated that the first time she met him she had fell in love. The hand on his cheek caused the god to lean into the touch much like he did when Tony did the same thing. Hearing more about what it had been like when Frigga had first seen him and how he had been quite content with her her caused him to smile. He was quite glad that she had decided to keep him instead of sending him to live with a courtier. "Mother..." Loki wept softly moving to wrap his arms around her. "Thank you...I do not deserve your love but I am thankful for it." he whispered.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga smiled softly when she saw Loki beginning to come to terms and understand things. Allowing Loki to hug her, she wrapped her arms around him. "You deserve everything in the world, my dear sweet Loki." She whispered. "I have always loved you and I always will, do not ever question that my dear." After a moment she continued to speak. "And as Odin could not deny me on this, you were raised in the palace. I had thought that Thor would be too young to remember you showing up, or the years you were a toddler and turned into your Jotun form when upset, but he wasn't. One day when you were both children, he approached us about it, curious. At the time you were just old enough to understand your heritage should we tell you. Odin and I argued for days about it. I wanted to tell you, so that you may avoid pain later, yet Odin was adamant that you would not understand and it would do more harm than good. We never agreed, be he ordered me, as the king to hold my tongue. It was the one and only time that he has ever done such a thing. He gave Thor similar orders, simply telling him that you were indeed his brother, but not full blooded." She explained. "That was the extent of Thor's knowledge in this matter. Now both of you know the truth." She sighed. Moving to meet Loki's eyes, she looked honestly pained. "I am sorry for the pain this secret has caused you.....I wish with all my heart I could have spared you that. I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me of this one day. All ever wanted was for you to be happy and safe....perhaps my actions had the opposite affects."
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki breathed in relief as Frigga wrapped her arms around him. "Not everything in the world or I would have Midgard." Loki joked softly. He couldn't help but smile when the woman said that she loved him and always would, he would not question her love for him again. Loki listened once more as she described how they had grown up and the fact that he had not stayed in an Aesir form the whole time surprised him. "I do not remember that." Loki stated. He could not recall ever displaying his Jotun form when he was younger. He was surprised when Frigga said that Thor had questioned his other form or that he had known for years. He was not surprised when he was continued to be told that Odin had banned the both of them from saying anything. "Mother, this is not your fault there is nothing you could have done to avoid the All father's orders. There is nothing for me to forgive you for mother. I was happy, I am happy." Loki protested, before looking to Tony with a smile.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga was pleased that Loki was at least able to joke at the moment. It meant that he'd be able to heal from this eventually. Hearing that he didn't remember, she shook her head. "You were very young then...man's we never treated you any differently when that happened. By the time you were four or five, it very rarely happened, and then it never happened again." She said softly. "A part of me was ashamed for that....you had lost half of your heritage....and you made for a handsome sight when you wherein your jotun form." She smiled. Hearing Loki's words, she gave a soft smile. "Thank you Loki. And I hope you may forgive Thor of this as well....is is more innocent than I am....and all he ever concerned himself with was that you were indeed his brother." She said. Kissing Loki's forehead, she gently wipes his tear stained cheeks. "Are there other questions I may answer for you my dear."
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki smiled seeing the pleased look on his mother's face at the joke he had made. As the conversation continued he nodded in understanding of why he did not remember ever being in his jotun form. "You do no think it the form of a monster?" Loki questioned a biit surprised. Despite Frigga telling him that they had treated him no different when in that form as a child, all Aesir viewed the Jotuns as monsters. "I do forgive him of this. There is nothing either of you could done. I am sorry brother." Loki apologized. Thor merely smiled and hugged the smaller god. At Frigga asking if he had any other questions he bit his lep before answering. "What of my children?" he begged.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga shook her head at Loki’s question. “Can Jotuns be frightening, they certainly can, but I have not viewed Jotuns as monsters due to their race if I could help it. Merely individuals that I view as cruel or harsh.” She answered. “And you are most certainly not a monster Loki…..” she added, giving him a serious look. To say that she was pleased that Loki forgave Thor of this was an understatement. She had hoped for them to begin reconciling for some time now and this seemed the perfect place to start. When Loki looked back to her and asked after his children, she sighed and shook her head slightly. “I cannot be of much help there. I do not have the power to free them, and I do not know where Fenrir is, though I do know he is safe and healthy. The only one I have seen in recent times is Hela. She has you’re humor……and as dark as her kingdom is, she has created quite a life there. You should be proud of her.” She said softly.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki listened to his mother feeling quite relieved at her words of wisdom in how she viewed half of what he was. When she looked at him with a quite serious expression and declared that he was not a monster he held his hands up in surrender. He couldn't help but smile at his mother however pleased how things were turning out after worrying so much about everything.When she answered the question about his children his face fell however, he had figured she didn't know anything about Fenrir but he had still hoped. "I am proud of her, I will never not be proud of them. I just wish they were with me. Why? Why did he have to send them away?" Loki questioned.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga felt her heart break for Loki at his clear disappointment. “I can not be sure Loki…..I wish I could. You know I was not in the palace during the time that he sent your children away. But perhaps what ever drove him has faded with the time since he cast them away…..perhaps you may address such matters to him again. After all, you have proven yourself capable many times since, and your children could act as a base to keep you from trouble…..I will see if Odin has thought on this any when I return to Asgard.” She said, petting Loki’s hair and cheek, looking over her son whom she hadn’t seen since he returned to Asgard, muzzled and chained. “There is a light in your eyes Loki……one that I had begun to think I would never see again.” She whispered, drinking him in. Though he looked tired and a little stressed, he seemed healthy and whole.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

"I know mother, I know had you been you would have helped me fight to keep them." Loki responded sadly. He knew Odin had waited until his mother was not present to banish his children because it would have been a harder fight had she been there. "Perhaps..." he agreed but he was not truly hopeful at the thought of Odin letting him have his children now. He had asked so many times before with the resounding No every time. He didn't think it would change now especially with the threat of Thanos. Closing his green eyes as his mother pet his hair and cheek he felt her comfort and love and basked in it for the moment he was allowed it, opening his eyes once more when she began to speak again. "I did not think it would return either but there is one here whom loves me and has fought for me despite the wrongs I have done." Loki whispered back taking another glance to Tony.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga nodded slightly at Loki’s words, following his gaze to take in Tony, whom had been standing with his back pressed against the wall. Feeling both of their eyes on him, he glanced at them and then away again, clearly uncomfortable at the moment. “Yes…..I have looked in on you once or twice since you came to Midgard……you and he are rather fond of each other….” she said slowly, not really giving away her thoughts and opinions on him. “He is a comrade of Thor’s, yes? Histories seem to suggest that his personal life is not all that much to be desired.” She said, looking back to Loki, clearly trying to get Loki’s perspective. Thor had never spoken ill of Tony other than to perhaps complain over how he teased him, but he had told his family everything about his personality and his history with family and friends, at least what he knew of it.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki smiled affectionately when the man glanced at the only to look away when he became uncomfortable.Hearing that his mother had looked in on him a few time since he had come to stay on Midgard made him wonder how long after his escape they had known where he was. He pushed that thought away happy that his mother still cared enough to make see he was alright. Then flushed red knowing that she might have looked upn him when Tony and he were doing more intimate things. Frowning in confusion at Frigga when she took on a tone that would tell him nothing about how she felt about Tony. Allowing her to continue he nodded where he could about Tony being Thor's comrade in battle. "I care not about his past, his iz nothing compared to mine. He does not hold me to my past even knowing what I have done, about my children and my jotun heritage. He accepts me for all that and even says that he appreciates my other form. Why should I hold him to his past when he allows me the mistakes of mine?" Loki questioned. "He is a good man mother and though I know Asgard does not approve of such things if he would have me I want him to always be a part of my life." he admitted.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga listened and shook her head slightly. “I care not the gender of your chosen companion…..I knew of your former lover soon after you and he began your relationship as well and I made no moves to stop that either.” She admitted. She hadn’t told Loki that she knew anything of Angriboda before. She had never visited though, knowing that she could end up leading Odin to them if she did. “I am merely concerned for your long term happiness. This man’s reputation is that of a…..playboy? I believe that is the popular term on Midgard. Are you not concerned that such tendencies will continue into your relationship?” she asked, looking back to Tony, looking him over critically. He looked so frail…..and he clearly had age on him that Loki still had thousands of years to reach. She was surprised he was not broken already from how Thor described his ‘fighting style’, which was to recklessly dive in from what she understood.  

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki smiled as his mother said that she cared not of the gender for his chosen. He was surprised that she knew of Angroboda and never said anything before. He opened and closed his mouth unsure what to say to her knowledge, and even Thor looked quite surprised. Shaking off a bit when she referred back to Tony and his past history and the life of the playboy that he had lived. "Of course I am, and I have seen his flirtation. However he assures me that it is as far as it will go. Tony is a one person man when he is in a serious relationship and until he shows me otherwise I will believe him." Loki argued. "Please mother, just give him a chance you will see how wonderful he is." Loki begged.  

[MDaylus]

Alikia Tsuki

Frigga was silent for a moment after Loki spoke, looking away in thought, processing all the information she knew and deciding her course of action. “I would speak with him.” She finally said, looking back to Loki before raising her hand slightly, letting Thor scramble up and take her hand to help her stand. Smoothing over her dress, she made sure she looked exactly like when she’d come in.
 

[Alikia Tsuki]

MDaylus

Loki watched his mother with baited breath, while he didn't need her approval for him to be with Tony but he desperately wanted it. Breathing a sigh of relief when she said that she would speak with Tony. Thor scrambled up to help her and Loki followed. He looked to Tony giving the man a reassuring smile when hr caught his gaze as he moved towards him. "My mother wishes to speak with you." Loki informed kissing the mans cheek.