HEAR YE CITIZENS OF NOSGOTH! (Please Excuse the Cobwebs)

[lilwriter23]

Neutering Vorador...

not a bad idea

*watches Merrival nibble* Aww ^^  

[MadxHatterxTeapot]

Indeed! anyone up for delivering a news report I don't much feel like it right now. lol  

[MadxHatterxTeapot]

Noes? XD Finnnnne. I must, I must.

--

Welcome to Circle of 9 News Network. The only News Network in Nosgoth ever!

Mortanius: Now wait just a moment here! Isn't there one in Coorhagen?


Merrival: *grabs a basket of rotten fruit to throw at him just in case* >____> Reee?

No Merrival, not today. ^o^

Merrival: Ree... *ears droop and he scurries away*

Good evening, I'm Madame Hatter-chan with the evening news. Tonight We're looking into disturbing events that appear to be sweeping not just the Nosgoth Nation, but the world as well. And this disturbing, horrifying phenomena is....

*dramatic epic music*

Sullivan: DON'T SAY IT!

>o> The horror of Twilight.

Sullivan: *bangs head on desk* NOOO!

Merrival: *pelts a painting of Edward Cullen with rotten fruit frantically* D< REE! REE! REE!!

*twitches because she had to say it*

Mortanius: o___o Is this phenomena that bad?

You have...NO. idea.

Yes folks, it's horrible. But in light of these...events. Ahem. Twilight has had no major effect on the vampire community in Nosgoth.

We take you now, to Nupraptor on the scene were some vampires are...actually protesting these 'sparkly vampires of perfect epic proportion'.

Nupraptor?

Nupraptor: I'm surprised I'm even here, Madame.

Oh, interviewing vampires on the subject of Twilight?

Nupraptor: No, I mean here as a newscaster. This is one of my better days because I'm not being a mad-man.

Oh...okay. Well, commence the questioning!

Nupraptor: Fledglings, what would you say about this travesty that's sweeping the globe?

Dumahim 1: D8< What the ******** is this horrible s**t?! Vampires don't sparkle!

Dumahim 2: What's this I hear about their eyes just...'glowing' with perfection? Rubbish!

Rahabim (from the water): They don't burn by water?! HA! Find some holy water, that'll work just fine. Pour it in their eyes, slice their throats open with your teetha nd pour it in there? Oh yeah, they'll burn right up.

Nupraptor: o3o; *looks at the camera man* Write this down for reference. NOW.

Well, some of these vampires seem really pissed by the fact that-

Nupraptor: *winces*

Angry Turelim: HUMANS AND VAMPIRES DO NOT MAKE MUTANT DEVIL SPAWN THAT GROWS AT A RAPID RATE! KILL 'EM! MAIM 'EM! DESTROY 'EM!

Sullivan: *rolls up sleeves* I'm gonna run down there and kick that guy in the face for being loud and obnoxious. D8<

Sit down. Bunneh thing.

Sulliven: -___________________-

Merrival: *is still throwing rotten fruit at the now clearly ruined painting of Edward Cullen*

Well then, we'll come back to check up on you in a bit Nupraptor...don't do anything drastic.

Mortanius: Is it safe to leave him there?

We'll find out later. XD In other news. Blood stock is up as usual, and human food levels have risen this week. Ooh! Exciting!

Mortanius: I think there's a new fast food place opening up here for vampires.

It's not a blood bank Mortanius...

Mortanius: No, it's called Doc' Veinalds.

Ahhh! I see. Oh wait. *checks report again* It is kind of a blood bank. Lol.

Mortanius: We'll be back after these brief messages.  

[Scrab Demon]

Oh geez. I just imagined the 'Kain's hair' thread.

Kain: *hair swish* Because I'm worth it. *wink!*  

[MadxHatterxTeapot]

Miss Scrab Demon, tell me about what you think of all of these Twilight Vampire events all over the globe.

Mortanius: Our Nosgothic vampires seem very upset and angry about this.

Sullivan: o___________O I think they're making catapults now to begin a war with Twitards.


*a group of Dumahim busily at work*

Well...anywho...*holds up Microphone to Miss Scrab Demon* :3

Merrival: *noms on Jelly beans and offers them to a group of Rahabim behind him*

Rahabim 1: o3o What's that?

Rahabim 2: I dunno. *takes*

Rahabim 3: *nom nom* OwO *sigar high*

Oh no. D:  

[lilwriter23]

PLease don't remind me of that sparkly horror...

My friend is dragging me to New Moon...I'm trying not to think about it...

Although it's not working since I'm plotting at the same time how to sneak a sketchpad and pencils to doodle with like I do in boring classes, and possibly a pillow.  

[Scrab Demon]

Huh? *turns around with severed head in hands, notices camera, then tosses it elsewhere*

Oh, uh, *Ahem*

Zeev: *huffs and crosses tentacles* A lengthy speech approacheth.

*grabs mic and makes a serious face to the camera*

I hold my tongue when it comes to the Twilight 'saga', being that I have never actually seen nor read the series for myself. But I am absolutely appalled at the fanbase. The way they attack other groups, and declare their superiority for all to hear, without sound reason is absolutely horrid. A Vampire is a vampire, no matter how sparkly, weak, superior, brutal, sexy, or demonic it may be. It's almost like the discrimination the human race faces against itself.

Sure, the Twilighters and the Hellsing fans may have completely different views, but it's this disrespect for the vampires themselves that disgusts me. Handsome or not, they deserve respect. They're historical figures, and having them reduced to neck-nibbling, lustful, nearly docile creatures is absolutely horrid. Puff the magic dragon does not represent the fire-breathing goliaths of the past. Edward Cullen and the doctrine of Anne Rice does not define the entirety of the vampire race.

There are some who are going to be like Edward, there are some who are going to be like Kain. There may even be some just like your creepy next-door neighbor. And? Get over it. Not every man in the world is going to turn into your sparkly bishie just because you want them to.

What most people tend to forget, is that they are far older than us. We can never even begin to imagine what goes on in the head of someone who's been living for far more than your measly little decades.

Unless they went completely mad, I doubt that every single vampire is actually going to hook up with every lonely clichéd schoolgirl they can find.

They're individuals, and should be treated as such.

So QUIT shoving your poorly constructed claims down my throat, Twi-tards! I KNOW that you think highly of whoever you pledge to, but you don't have to deface and defile every other significant vampire figure in the world. Believe what you believe in, but FOR THE LOVE OF WHATEVER YOU HAVE FAITH IN, HAVE SOME RESPECT! KEEP YOUR ******** MOOSHY, ILL CONCIEVED ROMANCE FICTION AND YOUR INSULTS TO VAMPIRE KIND TO YOURSELF!

*exhale* Thank you.

Zeev: Pfft. Can you TELL she's been working at that for days? rolleyes Forget me. *points* SHE's the spawn of the Elder God.

scream *pokes an eyeball* Shut your beak, calamari boy. You're not supposed to be able to talk at all!

Zeev: Well, neither is a person who's lost his jaw, tounge, and vocal cords, but everybody seems to hear him just fine.

SQUIDS MADE OF SOMETHING I FISHED OUT OF THE CRISPER ARE MEANT TO BE EATEN, NOT HEARD!

Zeev: *squeak*O.O ...Kay.

*turns back to camera* I'm also working on a theory, which compares the abomination of 'she who shall not be named' to a physical disease. More, when I'm done killing every Twilight related sod within a five mile radius of Nosgoth.

*hands the mic back* Has anybody seen Moe-tard? I have a crusade to start. *goes about making a bonfire out of the imported copies of Twilight*  

[Doc Dumaya]

*clapping* Bravi! Bravi! I do so enjoy your speeches, Scrab.

 

[MadxHatterxTeapot]

O______O *turns back to the camera* Ahem.

Mortanius: *does the slow, terrified clap of respect* Yes well...

Sullivan: 8D BUTTSCRATCHA!!!

No. <___< Not today.

Sullivan: DAWWW! T^T

>o< And it begins...again. Thank you for that lovely 'Daily Rant' report on Circle of 9 News Network Scrab Demon. :3 It was lovely enjoyable and...I think also a little violent.

*cough*

Mortanius: How would I know where Moebius is? I'm not his keeper.

You used to be. >w< *snort*

Merrival: *brings up a crudely crayon colored stock report* 8D Ree!

Aw thank you Merrival!

Blood stocks ar eup today and asyou can clearly see there's been a large increase in souls. Wow. Is this becoming a new drug trend or what? lol  

[Doc Dumaya]

Why'd you have to say the word "drug?"

Now I have "Zydrate Anatomy" stuck in my head....again.
Which isn't a bad thing, mind you, but still...

 

[Scrab Demon]

*raises hand* Actually, that might be my fault. I've found out the secret ingrediant of Pepsi, and I've started making my own, being that they no longer deliver to Nosgoth. For some reason, Twi-tards have more flavorful souls... I'm also attempting to get Zeev to move on from the souls of the sentient molds and fungus in my fridge. (Which kind of counts as cannibalism, but hey, at least it's getting cleaned.)

Zeev: Wait, you were serious about the crisper thing?

...Yeah.

Zeev: O_O *looks at tentacles* Oh my god...

*pats* Don't worry. They weren't capable of actual thought. Yet.

Zeev: Is this all I am? A SQUID?! OF FRATRICIDE?!

Calm down, man.

Zeev: THEY WERE TASTY!

*lightly throttles* GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!  

[MadxHatterxTeapot]

o.o Do tell.

Sullivan: *pokes head back in shamefully* o3o; T^T I suppose an 'I'm sorry' won't suffice?

Merrival: *tackles him* D< Ree!

Sullivan: *punt, kick, smack* D< GTFO!

Merrival: T^T REE! *falls over and cries because he got hit in the nose* >o< REEEEEE!

Sullivan: -___- I have a HORRID headache...  

[Azumith the Planner]

I have something to announce!

*ahem* GLICHY GAIA DAY IS FINALLY OVER!(atleast it seems like it...)

sweatdrop Thank you to all who stuck with us during these trying times.

Everyone who participated gets a cookie, EXCEPT Sullivan...  

[Scrab Demon]

*starts passing around the plate of cookies*

Not quite. The glitch may be over, where some pages now exist again, but the new posts keep shoving the other ones down, untill eventually, they are lost.

*starts saving posts in one-note*  

[Azumith the Planner]

Scrab Demon

*starts passing around the plate of cookies*

Not quite. The glitch may be over, where some pages now exist again, but the new posts keep shoving the other ones down, untill eventually, they are lost.

*starts saving posts in one-note*

Out with the old and in with the new?