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 Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 11:21 am
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My mom would masturbate to this. This is her doctrine.
-Frequently wears black clothing.
When I can...wait! Don't baptist priests wear black?
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
Christian Rock, mofos.
-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nail polish.
That has nothing to do with anything.
-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.
Or...maybe you are a paranormal scientist. Dib is not goth. Fookers. Egyptians aren't goths. Oh, and the upside-down cross is the St. Peter's Cross. FYI.
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos
What if that is their job...?
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
Well, don't christians preach something remeniscent (sp?) of "don't follow society"?
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
Pastors are pretty eccentric.
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
What if they are handicapped.
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
...
-Takes drugs.
Medicine
-Drinks alcohol.
No one drinks rubbing alcohol
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
Hey! My dear Chichow gets depressed sometimes, but she is SO not goth.
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
This is s**t. Self-mutilation is a term for someone who MUTILATES THEMSELF. I cut myself. That's just harm. And that has NOTHING to do with Satan.
-Complains of boredom.
I'm in an airplane. I had to leave my dancing bear at home. I'm bored. BAM! I'M A GOTH. My brother is a goth, my 3-YEAR-OLD sister is a goth...
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
Jet lag?
-Is excessively awake during the night.
Raccoons aren't goth. Nor are people who work the graveyard shift...
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
What about the biological term of photophobia?
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
"Son, what are you doing?" "Oh, I'm just masturbating. You know what, you can come in. I don't need privacy!"
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
*see above*
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil spirits through meditation.)
Or...I have a headache.
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
No offense, but while I'm going on a rollercoaster, I dont' want my nagging mom next to me, thank you very much.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
What if the "authority figure" is a ***** at school.
Gangsta=goth? Hell no.
-Misbehaves at home.
see above
-Eats excessively or too little.
...
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (*Remark: it's Count Chocula, not Dracula, idiots.)
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
What the heck?
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
You can only get televangelism on cable, dumfks.
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
There is a RPG christian game.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
my job is on the internet
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
isn't bowing to the alter and jumping and screaming and running considered violent reactions to music?
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
Britney Spears and Ciara aren't goth.
-Expresses an interest in sex.
...
-Masturbates
once again: ...
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
What?
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism (Oh no! The Dalai Lama! Danger!).
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
-Claims to be a goth.
No s**t.
If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.
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Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 2:00 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 2:11 pm
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I found this in the ED once.
Quote: -Frequently wears black clothing.
check
Quote: -Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
check
Quote: -Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nail polish.
no check
Quote: -Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.
no check
Quote: -Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
check
Quote: -Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
I listen to metal, goth, and some emo, so check.
Quote: -Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
Well, I hang out with a bunch of pyromaniacs. check
Quote: -Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
check
Quote: -Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
vampires FTW. check
Straight-edge, my friends. no check
see the above answer.
Quote: -Is suicidal and/or depressed.
occasionally depressed, never suicidal. check
Quote: -Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
nope.
who dosen't?
Quote: -Sleeps too excessively or too little.
I don't sleep that much, but that's just me. I don't like to sleep.
check.
Quote: -Is excessively awake during the night.
see above
Quote: -Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
So what if I don't like sunlight? It always gets extremely bright down here in Texas.
Quote: -Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
I could care less. no check
Quote: -Spends large amounts of time alone.
I don't have that many friends. check.
Quote: -Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil spirits through meditation.)
No demons, but if they listened closely, they'd find that I'd be listening to music.If they'd bother to walk in, they'd find that I'd be reading.
Quote: -Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
Don't care one way or the other. so check.
Quote: -Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
yes I do, so? I treat them like I would treat anyone else. check.
Who dosen't?
once more, who dosen't?
Quote: -Eats excessively or too little.
no check
Quote: -Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (*Remark: it's Count Chocula, not Dracula, idiots.)
Count Chocula FTW
Quote: -Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
I lap up my own blood after I get cut by something, and it tastes rather enjoyable. Check.
Quote: -Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
Check
Quote: -Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
Check.
Quote: -Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
Check.
Quote: -Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
Don't the devil-horns mean "I love you" in sign language? gice me a break!
Oh, and check.
Quote: -Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
I don't dance
Quote: -Expresses an interest in sex.
I'm not a pervert.
Quote: -Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
No check
Quote: -Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
No check
Quote: -Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
Um...sure.
Sometimes.
I got about 28.
My mother fits most of the discription. That scares me slightly.
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Posted: Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:53 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 06, 2006 9:06 pm
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-Frequently wears black clothing.
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nail polish.
-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
-Takes drugs.
-Drinks alcohol.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed. (depressed sometimes)
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
-Complains of boredom.
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
-Is excessively awake during the night.
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil spirits through meditation.)
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
-Misbehaves at school.
-Misbehaves at home.
-Eats excessively or too little.
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (*Remark: it's Count Chocula, not Dracula, idiots.)
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
-Expresses an interest in sex. (who's not at least interested in sex, it doesn't mean you're a perv or that you've even done it/want to do it yet. Sheesh.)
-Masturbates
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
-Claims to be a goth.
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Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 2:33 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 4:13 pm
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-Frequently wears black clothing.
THE PRIESTS...THEY ARE GOTH gonk
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
im wearing a greenday shirt now
SKIPPED TWO
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
wow....
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
anti-social?HES ON A BLOODY STAGE,HES SOCIAL!
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
no comment
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
the bibile and prayer?WHAT ABOUT EATING AND DRINKING???!!!! you wnt die aslong as you pray,even of you dont eat!GARUNTEED
disclaimer:the catholic church is not responcible for death
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
death invloves satan?I THOUGHT WE WENT TO HEAVEN??!! BOOHOO!
-Takes drugs.
yes the gangsters and hippies are now goth
-Drinks alcohol.
dont you drink alchahol in church for that thingy,and eat paper tasting bread!
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
this is EMO not goth
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
se above
-Complains of boredom.
is the bibl really that intresting?id be bored too!
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
now all teens are goth!
-Is excessively awake during the night.
EVERYONE WITH A NIGHT SHIFT...is goth
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
MICHEAL JACKSON IS GOTH?
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
whats theyre unusual?5mins?
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
this isnt goth,ITS LONER!
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil spirits through meditation.)
okeedokee then
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
i laugh at this one....idiots
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
RUN AWAY,IRAQ IS NOW GOTH!
-Misbehaves at school.
get a new VP
-Misbehaves at home.
call nanny911 allready!
-Eats excessively or too little.
cartman,is now goth
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (*Remark: it's Count Chocula, not Dracula, idiots.)
THIS ONEE IS THE BEST,NO JOKE NEEDED!shows you how stupid the church really is.
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
BUT I LIKE CHERRY KOOlAID!
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
yes keep them away from abc kids and treehouse,its bad!
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
its the japanese's's's's fault!blame them
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
...they dislike computer geeks
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
domokun
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
STP BUYING THE KID POLES AND HIS WONT HAPPEN!
-Expresses an interest in sex.
all grade two's and above are now officially goth
-Masturbates
98% of the wold is goth...2% is catholic.
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
EVERYONE,AFTER THE GAY GUY FROM FRIENDS...or whatver show it is
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
buddhism,DANGEROUS?
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
did they need to put this in here?
-Claims to be a goth.
ORLY?
If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.
21 APPLY TO ME!!! I GET TO GO TO THE NUTTYBOX!!!!YAY OLD MAGAZINES!!!!
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Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 5:06 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 7:32 pm
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Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 8:09 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 1:12 pm
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-Frequently wears black clothing. Yeah
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts. Somehow I doubt a Barenaked Ladies shirt is evil
-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nail polish. Yeah, sometimes
-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols. I have an ankh necklace. It's an egyptian symbol, geeze!
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos. Well, I have pierced ears, and some piercings are spiffy.
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.) I guess Evanescence is anti-social music
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically. Yep
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports. Definitely
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan. I'm a little interested in magic, but I haven't really studied it.
-Takes drugs. Just like ibuprofen and stuff.
-Drinks alcohol. I taste wine sometimes, but otherwise no.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed. I'm a little depressed, but not much.
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.) No
-Complains of boredom. Yeah
-Sleeps too excessively or too little. I sleep in a lot
-Is excessively awake during the night. I am on weekends
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.) I don't like bright sun, it hurts my eyes.
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy. I don't demand it, but I have it
-Spends large amounts of time alone. Yep
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil spirits through meditation.) Meditation is NOT evil!
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult. Who in the world would want an adult around when they are with friends?
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this. No
-Misbehaves at school. No
-Misbehaves at home. No
-Eats excessively or too little. No
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (*Remark: it's Count Chocula, not Dracula, idiots.) I don't think I do. O.o
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.) I only drink blood if I have a little cut on my hand, or something.
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.) Yeah
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature. Lol, yeah
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer. Pretty much
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music. Lol, sometimes
-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner. Sometimes
-Expresses an interest in sex. Yeah
-Masturbates Yeah
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual. Nope
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism. (Lol at Scientology) I have some interest in Paganism
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
No, not really
-Claims to be a goth. Nope
I think I got like, 24. That quiz is really funny.
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Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 8:29 pm
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Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 11:25 pm
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Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 11:34 pm
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Posted: Fri Dec 22, 2006 4:36 am
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Reply
