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[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Samuel wasn’t expecting him to actually watch and pay attention to the show. He knew how bored he got whenever he watched, but he supposed for the moment it provided them both with a distraction. With their bellies full to the brim, there was not much holding them back from their talk. Samuel was feeling a little anxious and knew that delaying things would only make it more awkward. But he didn’t know how to start the conversation, instead he opted for something easy. Samuel smiled softly and nodded you’re welcome. he replied. Sitting up, he grabbed his plate and silverware. ”Can I take your plate?” he asked as he started to rise from the couch.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • Indeed the television provided a distraction but not enough to keep the thoughts at bay. He kept his eyes on the TV until Samuel had questioned him. Micha tried not to let the panic show. He knew there wasn't much else to keep them from talking. However he wished they wouldn't. Obviously yesterday had ended terribly. Micha didn't want to imagine what Samuel thought or would say to him. He was thankful for the small talk for what it was, but knew it wouldn't last.

Micha listened as Samuel spoke, watching as he shifted to grab his plate and silverware. He too was finished with their meal. Micha heard Samuel speak and leaned forward to grab his plate and silverware to hand it to Samuel to help.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

They couldn’t keep holding off, it would only get worse if they did. He didn’t know why he was so worried about talking to him. He shouldn’t be, but he was. Samuel kept the conversation between them light. He could see how antsy Micha was and didn’t want to scare him off. Rising from the couch, Samuel gathered his plate and utensils, soon questioning the male if he was done. He took the items and quietly thanked him. Straightening up, he took the dishes and walked down the hall to the kitchen.

Samuel took his time throwing the scraps in the trash. He then moved to the sink and rinsed the dishes, twisting and turning the plates beneath the warm water while his mind wandered. It shouldn’t be this hard to apologize but here he was. Sighing to himself, Samuel finished rinsing the dishes and wiped his hands. He walked back to the living room and started to gather the containers to put away as well. He took the three containers closest to him, planning to come back for the rest. He didn’t ask Micha for help as he didn’t want to disturb him just yet.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • It was hard not to be nervous or scared, especially when their last conversation didn't go well. Micha didn't know how to act. He wasn't about to leave back to his hotel room but he could easily hide if he wanted to. Micha handed his plates to Samuel, glancing as he left the living room to head to the kitchen. He remained where he was. Micha wasn't sure if Samuel wanted help or not.

A few minutes passed before Samuel returned to gather the containers. He didn't want to be rude, so he waited as Samuel left to grab the rest. Micha stood walking down the hallway toward the kitchen with the last remaining items in hand. He didn't want Samuel to have to do everything.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Coming back to the living room, Samuel started to gather up the containers of leftovers. He didn’t ask Micha for help because he wanted him to relax. It wouldn’t take him too long to put everything away. After grabbing three of the containers, he walked back to the kitchen. Samuel set them on the counter as he moved to the cabinets and took out a few pieces of Tupperware.

He busied himself with pouring his leftover soup into the plastic container, adding in the remaining broth, noodles, and some more garnishes. This would definitely keep him fed for another day or two.Next, he opened his rice box and combined it with the remaining spring rolls. He had thought about adding in Micha’s rice with his own, but didn’t know if he would like that. He couldn’t recall if Micha liked fried rice. Either way, if he wanted to take his food home with him, he thought it best to keep their meals separate. Samuel turned to place the containers in the fridge.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • Micha wasn't bothered by helping even if Samuel didn't ask. He just couldn't sit there and relax as it were. Holding onto the containers, he entered the kitchen to see Samuel working on putting the food into Tupperware. Micha walked toward the island as he set the last of the containers down beside Samuel while he worked. He moved toward one of the chairs as he pulled it back. Micha took a seat as he watched Samuel.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

While preparing to put everything away, he had heard the light footsteps of the other. He didn't necessarily need help, but he appreciated it all the same. Samuel smiled his thanks as Micha set the containers down on the counter for him. He continued to busy himself with putting everything in something a little sturdier than Styrofoam and stacking it in the fridge. When he finished a couple of minutes later, he closed the door and turned his attention at last to Micha. He thought about making another excuse, but stopped himself before he could even open his mouth. Steeling himself, Samuel moved around the island and pulled out a seat beside the male. "Wanna talk?" he asked calmly. He knew that neither of them were ready, but it was time. Holding off was only making things awkward. It was better to just do it and get it over with.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • Micha was patient as Samuel took his time. He wasn't bothered as he watched him. It wasn't long before Samuel finished putting everything in the fridge and threw away the trash. Micha watched as Samuel soon joined him, sitting in the other seat at the island. He could only guess what the next step was however he wasn't in the mood but knew it was inevitable. Micha listened as Samuel questioned him. He took amusement out of the question. "About what?" Micha asked in return, playing dumb. He had talked yesterday with no response. What was the point now?

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Taking a seat beside Micha he questioned him calmly. He didn’t know if the man would talk, but it was time they said something. He couldn’t dance around it any longer, he wanted things to go back to normal. That couldn’t happen if they were both sitting around, practically ignoring each other. When Micha spoke, Samuel smiled as he played dumb. ”About …how I didn’t mean to make feel like you needed to leave.” he replied slowly. Leaning on the counter, he turned slightly towards the male. Samuel knew he’d been insensitive but it wasn’t on purpose. He needed Micha to understand that he wasn’t trying to hurt him.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • It was easier to ignore what had happened than to face it. However it wouldn't solve anything. Micha questioned Samuel in return, watching as he smiled. He listened as Samuel spoke though his words were no better. Micha watched as Samuel turned to face him. He too didn't know how to respond without being a jerk but he couldn't help himself. "Yes, but you didn't stop me either." Micha responded knowing his words were cruel but it was the truth. He had felt the need to leave after he admitted to his alcohol problem. Micha had kept it to himself for the exact reason as last night. He knew it wouldn't be understood.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Like it or not they needed to talk. Things would only get worse if they ignored it. Samuel knew that it wasn’t going to be easy, he didn’t expect it to be. He spoke sincerely and calmly, not knowing what the man might say to him. But this time he was ready for him. When Micha spoke, he heard the hurt in his words. ” I thought that was what you wanted.” he replied. In truth, he hadn’t been entirely sure if Micha wanted to go, but he was so quick to get dressed and downstairs he didn’t know what to do. ”I don’t understand why you got so angry. I was listening, I was trying to be understanding. What did I do to make you so upset?” Samuel still didn’t understand what happened between them. He had thought staying quiet would have been much better than trying to pry anything else out of him. Somehow he was still in the wrong.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • Micha spoke toward Samuel, he couldn't exactly remain calm. Of course he had been hurt. He listened as Samuel spoke, assuming what he had been feeling. Micha hadn't wanted to stay after being given the silent treatment. He didn't know what Samuel was thinking other than silently judging him. Micha had felt self conscious after telling Samuel about his drinking problem. He had wanted to better himself by recovering although he wondered somedays what was the point but he couldn't return to that.

Hearing Samuel question him, he tried to not get annoyed with how the conversation was going so far. Micha wanted to close himself off but he remained seated. "You just ignored me Samuel, so why should I have stayed?" He questioned in return. Sure they had talked but in the end Samuel simply ignored him so he'd seen no point in staying.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Samuel did his best to remain calm as they continued to talk. It was interesting to hear the male's thoughts and how he perceived his actions. Because in actuality, they were nothing to what he was describing. He had thought he had been doing well by letting him speak and listening to his concerns. He might have been a little shocked to learn his boyfriend was an alcoholic, but he certainly wasn't judging him about it. Samuel continued to question the man to try and figure out how they had gotten here. He didn't know what he did wrong. However, when Micha it only brought on more confusion on his part. "Wait, what? I didn't ignore you." he said, dumbstruck. "I was asking questions, you were answering those questions, and then I couldn't think of my next question. So I started smoking to try to think of my next question. I even offered you my cigarette."

He sat there feeling like an even bigger idiot. In no way had he been ignoring him, at least not on purpose. Even while Micha had been answering his questions, he could tell that the conversation was going south. Samuel had tried his hardest to ask the least insensitive but also most important questions he could think of. He had wanted to know everything but the man was so tight-lipped he didn't know what was right or wrong or just plain inappropriate to say to him. He had known people with drinking problems in the past, but he was never close with them, and he certainly had never been dating any of them. He had thought by keeping his prying to a minimum it would have made the conversation easier.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • Micha had felt ignored. They had been talking as Samuel had asked questions but then he stopped talking to him. He thought Samuel had been mad at him. Micha had left, seeing it as his only solution. Plus it wasn't as if Samuel stopped him, especially by allowing him to leave by disarming the alarm.

As he spoke, Micha watched the confusion on Samuel's face. He didn't understand what had happened between them either. Micha listened as Samuel explained his understanding of what happened. He was starting to feel stupid for what had happened. Micha was used to Samuel's million question game when it came to certain things. However when Samuel quit talking to him, he just thought they were done and Samuel didn't want to talk to him.

He sighed mostly to himself. "How was I supposed to know you were thinking?... Silence from you always worries me…" Micha hated when Samuel was silent, it never meant anything good. However now he hated himself for his misunderstanding.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

It had not been his intention to ignore Micha. At the time, he thought he was doing the right thing by keeping his questions to a minimum and trying not to piss him off. If he was being honest, he had thought Micha was mad at him for assuming how he’d been living during their separation. How was he to know that he would be so miserable that he started drinking like a fish. As they continued to talk, Samuel grew more confused and tried to explain his behavior. He thought it was obvious that he was being careful with his line of questioning. But apparently it had added to Micha’s own worries.

Beside him, Micha sighed and continued to share his perspective. In hindsight he felt bad for appearing distant, but there was no taking it back now. ”But, I’m always quiet when I’m thinking…if you had waited I might have come up with another question, or something intelligent to say.” he replied. Samuel couldn’t help it that he needed silence to think. Just as he also couldn’t help it if Micha thought he was angry at him. It appeared that they had both misunderstood the situation.