No s**t, There I Was.....

[Not-So-Sweet Transvestite]

xxDethWishxx

squire to fools

Caid has a lot of good nickname stories...

Another one (not a nickname), which is almost certainly made up but excellent nonetheless...

Not long ago, Caid was a principality to the West. In those days, one had to have a consort to compete in a Crown tourney, but many existing restrictions had not yet been applied. When a young fighter entered the lists for the experience, he didn't expect to win. However, he had no consort. Grasping a straws, he asked a local knight if he could fight for the honor of his twelve-year-old daughter. The knight consented.

The young man won Crown, and the young lady became princess.

At war that year the little princess was wandering about in her usual garb, with neither crown nor decoration to distinguish her as princess. She stumbled across the path of a duke, who stopped in his tracks to look down his nose at her.

"Where I come from," he scolded, "little girls bow to dukes."

The princess did so and appologized, quickly making herself scarce. That night she mentioned what happened to Paul, then King of the West. The following day the West's royalty (Paul and his Queen as well as quite a few princes and princesses) and their guard moved in a great procession to the court where found was the offending duke, Caid's prince and princess to the rear. As the procession halted, the regal child moved to the front. She stood before the duke and in a loud, clear voice proclaimed

"Where I come from, Lords bow to Ladies."

very cool.

Like I said, it was almost certainly dreamed up by a bard, but I'd have killed to see something like that.  

[Neko_Bast]

Isn't quite a 'No s**t' story but still funny ^-^

There I was at the An Tir/West War of 2001. It was night and me and my friend, Rissi, and her girlfriend, Tiara, had found some men to keep us company (2 to be exact). We were watching some fire dances when they desided to do a slave auction. One of the guys bid on this guy (his friend) but he didn't have the stuff he bid with, with him. So he and the other guy with us were put up there with the first guy! Now there were 3 guys being auctioned off. Tiara decided to be funny and said she would pay 3.50 for all three of them......and she won. ^-^  

[Not-So-Sweet Transvestite]

(fresh from war--got back about 2 hours ago)

No s**t there I was on the Storm Troopers' right flank. I was not happy about this. The nearest allies were thirty yards back.

The Storm Troopers charged.

To the left.

In short, no s**t, there I was, completely alone.

No, not completely alone. I had lots and lots of company, but they were all looking at me a might unfriendly. Five Westies were squared off against me. I was already dead. It was only a matter of how many of them went to Hel with me.

I picked one, charged, and got the snot beat out of me.

When I got to the sidelines I met my trainer.

"I was agressive," I said. "It didn't help."

He smiled at me. "That's okay. That was the king."  

[Not-So-Sweet Transvestite]

No s**t, there I was, tight in my sheild wall. There were twenty of us and two hundred of them.

And the look of terror on their faces...  

[musicman3672]

squire to fools

(fresh from war--got back about 2 hours ago)

No s**t there I was on the Storm Troopers' right flank. I was not happy about this. The nearest allies were thirty yards back.

The Storm Troopers charged.

To the left.

In short, no s**t, there I was, completely alone.

No, not completely alone. I had lots and lots of company, but they were all looking at me a might unfriendly. Five Westies were squared off against me. I was already dead. It was only a matter of how many of them went to Hel with me.

I picked one, charged, and got the snot beat out of me.

When I got to the sidelines I met my trainer.

"I was agressive," I said. "It didn't help."

He smiled at me. "That's okay. That was the king."

At least you went down in style! biggrin  

[Courtesan Brigitte]

This is not combat-related, but it's still conquest...

At Estrella I attended the SCA 40th Anniversary ball. I'd been dancing mostly with a male friend from my home barony, or, when he was chasing skirt, whoever was standing nearby and looking impressionable. I'm not generally the kind of lady who waits to be asked, so often men don't have time.

Halfway through the night a very timid knight (which of course caught my attention) begged the favor of a dance. However, the next dance was not being taught, and neither of us knew it--so we agreed to delay it one. However, when the next dance was being announced another knight in attendance rushed over, took my hand, and barked an order: "you! Beauty! Dance with me!"

I'm sure he meant well.

The night went on, and every dance there was another man with spurs competing for my attention. Standard fun.

At the shaudenfrude (or however it's spelled) the next night, I was wandering around looking for someone (whether it was a specific someone or just someone interesting I can't remember), and one of the knights from the evening before approached me.

"I've been holding this all night," he said, presenting a cloven fruit, "swearing that the next time you walked by I'd give it to you... now I know you're not interested, but please... just take it."  

[Not-So-Sweet Transvestite]

I got my a** beat in a tourney this weekend... I don't really have a story about it, but it was a good tourney, and I'm so bruised it hurts to type.  

[Wave-Darer]

[ Message temporarily off-line ]  

[Icelemental]

I love your song. I can just picture the stunned looks on your opponents faces. xd

Okay, I got a few.

A few years back on halloween three of us went into 7-11 fully armed with live steel and casually got some slurpees. The 7-11 guy didn't even BLINK. Maybe he sees stuff like that on a regular basis, I don't know.

Last year my high school put on Ren Feast gig, and they had some cheap foiles(sp) and sabers that really weren't up to par. So we used my swords instead. xd (I've got plenty) That all went over great. What didn't go over so hot was when, at around 1 am, after everything was cleaned up and I was giving my friend a ride home, I got pulled over for speeding. With my entire arsenal splayed in the back of the truck. needless to say, its a DAMN good thing the cop knew the feast was going on that night, or I'd have been screwed. xd  

[MorganOfCalafia]

ok these are boring but ive got a couple from porter duty.
Once my friends and I were doing porter duty (dutie what ever) and theres these huge hills leading to potreo park right? well we see this little dot coming slowly to the park . we go on a lunch break and come back and the persons still running toward the park. about 15 minutes later she gets there "thanks for saving me guys" she says "ive been running the whole way the aliens were trying to get me!'' all my friend could do was stare at me and im like what ever .... now i get this lady every war and i have to call the constables every time XD  

[MorganOfCalafia]

the next one is also a porter dutie . I was chasing a motor cycle down the street cause it just cruised by without showing a tolken. as i was chasing the motor cyle i get a call from my partner sayin he needs help. so i get back to my post and theres a guy laying in the middle of the road waiting for his girfriend to run him over. it too about 5 constables to get him off the road XD  

[MorganOfCalafia]

ok heres another one.. at potreo my friend and i are considered "the porters" cause weve chased ove 30 cars and last war we did about 30 hours of porter XD  

[Naito_Mitsukai]

lolz this one's kinda boring!! but oh wellz!! =P

No s**t, there i was - joking around with about 4 guys - all easily older then me, making my usualy perverted comments, and joking around not knowing who any of them were. At one point i'd made a rather mean joke about the prince (this was my first SCA event, and i didn't know anyone really, and i didn't know what the prince looked like - only that he was at the event) now, keep in mind, i though - it's about 1am, there's only me and 4 other guys at the fire on the edge of the grounds where we were having the event and it's pitch back *save the fire* i'd assumed the royalty would be asleep.

well everyone starts laughing their asses off except for one person who seemed to be trying not to laugh, but at the same time kind of resentful (i thought maybe he just knew the prince personally .. and he did ... more then i realized) .....

and i'm a little comfused thinking "ok ... it wasn't that funny" and someone mentioned 'you have guts' and so on.

well an hour or so later and the other 3 had left slowly one by one, and me and the last guy get talking

i moved closer to the guy for two reasons 1(most importantly) the smoke was blowing in my eyes, and two, i figured i should actualy SEE who i'm talking to - so i know who to talk to the next day

..... i freeze ..... i remember a photo i'd seen while brousing the SCA websites ....all i could think was OH ....CRAP .....

"umm.... you wouldn't happen to be the prince ... would you .... lord?"
and he laughs a bit 'yeah i'm Prince Ulf' *gulp* "I'M SORRY YOUR HIGHNESS I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU PLEASE ACCEPT MY APPOLOGY" and he just starts laughing and said 'it's okay, dont' worry about it'

i think he was kinda taking pitty on me since at one point i'd mentioned this was my first offical SCA event, and that i didn't really know anyone rofl but yeah great first impression eh?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

also
-on the last day ~no s**t i was there~ i was wearing my wench outfit, and i was going to wear it all the way home (any excuse to wear the darn thing) and some people in mondane clothes, randomly talking as a guy my age-ish is teaching me to play honkerdown *and i'm kicking a*** and randomly i hear a "well lets just as this young wench here to do it" ~turn - look - lose the game~
"what sorry?" "can you give this to the prince for us?" "umm... okay?" *handed a rather large bottle of scotch* eek and he told me to say something ... two words .. but i forget what it was now! they ment 'a gift' or something so i was supposed to say "~those2words~ from the populace" and i said ... ok "just drop it in his lap" lolz i said "well... i don't know if i can get that close without getting my hand cut off though"

and the two gentlemen just started laughing, and i went on my merry way, and waited just outside the field while he finished his meeting, and then came up behind him, 'your highness' ~cursty~ as i curtsy and he's in the progress of turning in his chair *kinda hard in those figgin huge things * and i dropp it in his lap-ish *not getting too close!! lolz* and i say what i'm supposed to, and curtsy and leave and hear him laughing it up with everyone!! it was so awesome

-caught a couple comments from him and the other coronets that everyone was trying to get him drunk every which way her turned  

[Naito_Mitsukai]

eek *blink*blink* .... oh no!! i killed the thread with my boring story! NOOOOOOOOOOO!! crying *grabs electric paddles* LIVE DAMN YOU LIVE! mad

sorry i had to say that!! rofl  

[Arithrel]

Naito_Mitsukai

lolz this one's kinda boring!! but oh wellz!! =P

No s**t, there i was - joking around with about 4 guys - all easily older then me, making my usualy perverted comments, and joking around not knowing who any of them were. At one point i'd made a rather mean joke about the prince (this was my first SCA event, and i didn't know anyone really, and i didn't know what the prince looked like - only that he was at the event) now, keep in mind, i though - it's about 1am, there's only me and 4 other guys at the fire on the edge of the grounds where we were having the event and it's pitch back *save the fire* i'd assumed the royalty would be asleep.

well everyone starts laughing their asses off except for one person who seemed to be trying not to laugh, but at the same time kind of resentful (i thought maybe he just knew the prince personally .. and he did ... more then i realized) .....

and i'm a little comfused thinking "ok ... it wasn't that funny" and someone mentioned 'you have guts' and so on.

well an hour or so later and the other 3 had left slowly one by one, and me and the last guy get talking

i moved closer to the guy for two reasons 1(most importantly) the smoke was blowing in my eyes, and two, i figured i should actualy SEE who i'm talking to - so i know who to talk to the next day

..... i freeze ..... i remember a photo i'd seen while brousing the SCA websites ....all i could think was OH ....CRAP .....

"umm.... you wouldn't happen to be the prince ... would you .... lord?"
and he laughs a bit 'yeah i'm Prince Ulf' *gulp* "I'M SORRY YOUR HIGHNESS I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU PLEASE ACCEPT MY APPOLOGY" and he just starts laughing and said 'it's okay, dont' worry about it'

i think he was kinda taking pitty on me since at one point i'd mentioned this was my first offical SCA event, and that i didn't really know anyone rofl but yeah great first impression eh?

LOL, Ulf's a pretty easygoing guy. The first time he won coronet, they gave him a set of castle legos to keep him occupied during court since he was the "baby prince"....lmao.