The avatar above you is the god/goddess of...?

[Millenium Joker]

Goddess of *Pats on head* It's okay. blaugh  

[Kitten254]

god of hugs  

[Millenium Joker]

DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUUUUG!? blaugh  

[Kitten254]

*outstretches arms* yes sad  

[Millenium Joker]

*huge bear hug*

Come on, let it all out, you'll feel better. Youse can tells meh what the problem is. neutral  

[Oo_Hunter of Pierce_oO]

-glomps kitten-  

[Kitten254]

*tears well up* i wish someone worked as hard and long as i do to try and to keep me and there best friend and reason to live. I wish i was as wanted to someone as melina is to me. I wish people would listen and not judge me becuz i see things differently and i have a different opinion. I wish i had more respect than i get. I wish people would be nicer. I wish people understood the back aching will i give everyday to keep what little i have left. They can only listen and imagine how much pain im in everyday keeping my whole soul locked away with this bitter mask that stabs my heart to wear! They can only listen and imagine, but they will never understand!!! They cant imagine how completely bone breaking painful this is to bear!!! I dont understand why I'm even trying anymore, i can only hope things get better, YET EVERYTIME SOMETHING GOOD HAPPENS SOMETHING ELSE IN MY LIFE DISAPPEARS!!!!! ITS LIKE ONE OF THOSE STUPID BARTERING GAMES, "I'LL TRADE YOUR FRIENDSHIP WITH THIS PERSON FOR A NEW CAT!!!" "I'LL TRADE HEATHER FOR YOUR STRAIGHTENER" "I'LL TRADE MELINA FOR YOUR CAT!!!" "I'LL TRADE CHLOE FOR LYING RUMORS!!!!" UGHHHHHHH............I just wanna fall asleep an never wake up. Or move in with Rain and finally be at home. I just wanna go home.....Somewhere where i belong and where someone loves me, and wants to keep me!!!  

[Millenium Joker]

........Wow.

I... I don't know what to say to that.

Something tells me being a smartass is extremely inappropriate right now.

Hmm....


Huh. neutral  

[Kitten254]

i cant even stop crying cuz i just opened my soul and i cant close it damnit!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WANNA SMASH MY HEAD AGAINST A WALL OR A MIRROR AS HARD AS I CAN!!!!!!  

[Millenium Joker]

NOOO, No nonononono, don't do THAT!

Just....
sit down, make some tea, and get some rest.

If I could comfort ye, you know I would, but there's not much I can do from the other side of the US.

Just... get some rest. That's the only thing I can recommend apart from smoking a blunt- I wouldn't suggest you do that.  

[Kitten254]

i'm listening for a heart beat........

this is how it sounds

.......beat........beat...........beat........beat......be-.....-at......beat...........beat  

[Millenium Joker]

Umm........... is that YOUR heart? That sounds a bit irregular.  

[Kitten254]

it been irregular since chloe moved and i commit suicide....i almost drowned...but umm....my umm guardian dude pulled me out....and helped me umm get the water outta me....

ya thats my heart....i know it sounds like it gonna give out....one time id did for a whole hour...but i didnt die....  

[Millenium Joker]

AAAAAAND, NOW I am officially concerned.

Damn you for making me care. confused  

[Kitten254]

i told the doctors about my heart....they say its cuz i have a bad habbit of not breathing much, i breathe.....

when the doctor was checking my breathing he actually spent about 5 mintues making m hyperventilate to make sure i had a pulse. Maybe my brain doesnt want me to live so its making the brain stem ease up on my breathing skills.....idk.....

trust me joker i have a really hard head, i slammed my head as HARD I F*CKING COULD last year on the PURE METAL spot inbetween lockers and i didnt even get one cut, i didnt even feel it. I just felt the shock of it....no black out, nothing...i just stood there laughing my a** off then i fell to the ground and started crying while my friends picked me and asked me what was wrong....i told them and they got concerned then i screamed as loud as i could in the halls......and got in buig trouble......EITHER WAY i gotta thick head