dating and Islam

[Bharatiyaa_ larki]

The_Pathan

Flirting, looking at eye, touchin = haram.

Talking = halal

Right?

So internet dating = halal if no flirting?

Then its not dating.. its just having a pen pal rolleyes  

[Cora Merle Seraph]

On a related note does anyone else hate it when people pair ya up with someone (saying stuff like aren't you bf/gf, you twp should get merry, and you two would have such cute kids together)? I know I do. It has screw up at least two very good friendships of mines (damn peanut galleries) cause the twits bring up subjects neither me or my friends felt comfortable thinking about yet. Good intentions on thier part but ultimately just a pain in the @$$. People need to learn to mind their business.

PS thank god the 2nd friend in question hasn't heard any of the 'ya would have cute kids together comments yet' cause they will go nuts on me instead of the idiot that made the comment (cries a little and hides LoL my friend hasn't gotten it in thier head that just because people outside of our friendship feel such doesn't mean I do *rolls eyes*)  

[Cora Merle Seraph]

Bharatiyaa_ larki

The_Pathan

Flirting, looking at eye, touchin = haram.

Talking = halal

Right?

So internet dating = halal if no flirting?

Then its not dating.. its just having a pen pal rolleyes

or to use an other word correspondent esp for a site like deviantart (of which I am a member of)  

[Bharatiyaa_ larki]

Cora Merle Seraph

On a related note does anyone else hate it when people pair ya up with someone (saying stuff like aren't you bf/gf, you twp should get merry, and you two would have such cute kids together)? I know I do. It has screw up at least two very good friendships of mines (damn peanut galleries) cause the twits bring up subjects neither me or my friends felt comfortable thinking about yet. Good intentions on thier part but ultimately just a pain in the @$$. People need to learn to mind their business.

PS thank god the 2nd friend in question hasn't heard any of the 'ya would have cute kids together comments yet' cause they will go nuts on me instead of the idiot that made the comment (cries a little and hides LoL my friend hasn't gotten it in thier head that just because people outside of our friendship feel such doesn't mean I do *rolls eyes*)

yes it does.. but I tell them that I don't think of the person that way and for them to stop making those comments.. if you say it in a stern yet respectful way they will listen.. and do it around your friend so that he can hear it as well. The world needs to think beyond just Bf/gf relationships.. there are more serious relationships than these  

[Fish of Steel]

there is an Islamic version of dating

first of all in most muslim societies especially arabic ones if u meet a girl in college or she is a relative or ur families know each other any way it does not matter and u like this girl u talked to her a few times and u like how she is and u wana get to know her better right.

if u cared about her u would go to her family and ask for her hand, Im not saying get married!!! Im saying get engaged u can stay engaged for 10 years if u want to its both of ur choices

now why did I say if he cared about her because:

1-any were in the world why do most ppl date, to meet some one fall in love and get married right? then when u go ask for her hand ur saying "I would like to know u better and if we like each other we will get married"

2-if a girl is seen alone with a guy (in muslim societies) it will bring bad rumors and if u care about a girl u would not want ppl calling her a slut right especially if she is a respectable girl.

and if a muslim man meets a muslim girl and does not do it the right way he does not really care about her and is just having fun.

of course while engaged many things are not allowed, but different societies believe different things about the rules between 2 ppl engaged

do i need to explain more sweatdrop  

[The_Pathan]

Quote:

Mind the humor you know what I mean..

Mind the humor??? Nope. If i talk serious then everyone will start to cry, believe me stare

Quote:

Then its not dating.. its just having a pen pal

Don't u date without flirting???? question

Interresting okhti... But engaged, dossen't that means to get married?

Now, if she got no parrents? wink  

[Bharatiyaa_ larki]

The_Pathan

Quote:

Mind the humor you know what I mean..

Mind the humor??? Nope. If i talk serious then everyone will start to cry, believe me stare

Quote:

Then its not dating.. its just having a pen pal

Don't u date without flirting???? question

Interresting okhti... But engaged, dossen't that means to get married?

Now, if she got no parrents? wink

I mean that during that time that you knew what I meant.. without the machine you know that you cannot mix water and oil together.. putting that aside..

I don't date therefore I don't date without flirting.. I don't flirt at all..
and engaged does mean to get married however thats the time when usually the bride to be and the groom to be get to prepare for there future get a chance to know whats its like to live with eachother get to know eachother better...

If she doesn't have any parents then ask her for her hand or a close relative like uncle or aunt..  

[The_Pathan]

I get you 3nodding  

[Cora Merle Seraph]

Bharatiyaa_ larki

Cora Merle Seraph

On a related note does anyone else hate it when people pair ya up with someone (saying stuff like aren't you bf/gf, you twp should get merry, and you two would have such cute kids together)? I know I do. It has screw up at least two very good friendships of mines (damn peanut galleries) cause the twits bring up subjects neither me or my friends felt comfortable thinking about yet. Good intentions on thier part but ultimately just a pain in the @$$. People need to learn to mind their business.

PS thank god the 2nd friend in question hasn't heard any of the 'ya would have cute kids together comments yet' cause they will go nuts on me instead of the idiot that made the comment (cries a little and hides LoL my friend hasn't gotten it in thier head that just because people outside of our friendship feel such doesn't mean I do *rolls eyes*)

yes it does.. but I tell them that I don't think of the person that way and for them to stop making those comments.. if you say it in a stern yet respectful way they will listen.. and do it around your friend so that he can hear it as well. The world needs to think beyond just Bf/gf relationships.. there are more serious relationships than these

Oh I know I just wish my best friend did as well. Even my friend own mother, my mom who is like a 2nd mom to them try to explain things to them (that just because people think we are a couple doesn't mean we are). My friend is a little nuts even thier own family well say such. We have even gonna as far to have to say to them (my friend) that not everyone is out to get into your pants *sigh*. More my friend problem then my own now I guess.  

[Cora Merle Seraph]

Fish of Steel

there is an Islamic version of dating

first of all in most muslim societies especially arabic ones if u meet a girl in college or she is a relative or ur families know each other any way it does not matter and u like this girl u talked to her a few times and u like how she is and u wana get to know her better right.

if u cared about her u would go to her family and ask for her hand, Im not saying get married!!! Im saying get engaged u can stay engaged for 10 years if u want to its both of ur choices

now why did I say if he cared about her because:

1-any were in the world why do most ppl date, to meet some one fall in love and get married right? then when u go ask for her hand ur saying "I would like to know u better and if we like each other we will get married"

2-if a girl is seen alone with a guy (in muslim societies) it will bring bad rumors and if u care about a girl u would not want ppl calling her a slut right especially if she is a respectable girl.

and if a muslim man meets a muslim girl and does not do it the right way he does not really care about her and is just having fun.

of course while engaged many things are not allowed, but different societies believe different things about the rules between 2 ppl engaged

do i need to explain more sweatdrop

arabic muslims scare me LoL (justing being sarcastic due to a friend of mines having difficulties more unique to arab Muslims and not Muslims in general). It seems the only person that doesn't trust me with my best friend of mines is my friend. My sentiment on the whole issue of engagement is until you can both afford a home and one more child then you already have (hoping that number is zero unless alreadyb wedded once before) on your own you have no business getting merry. Of course this is coming from someone who is told they have too much self control for their own good. Whearas my friend from my undertstanding had some weird moments when younger and is a fire cracker type of person (doesn't know how to think before speaking for exmaple).

It is kinda easy for me to have self control considering I never have like being touch and having strong tedency for UTIs most of my life (Uninary Tracts Infections) through diet alone much less sex. Then when you take into account I am prone to Kidney Stone at worst can in theory greatly harm and even unintenionally kill myself even via proper sexual behavior (not until merry with the intent of having kids etc). I guess you could say I am biologically design to be with one and only I am willing to die for.  

[The_Pathan]

Well said smile

You use very advanced words sweatdrop  

[Cora Merle Seraph]

The_Pathan

Well said smile

You use very advanced words sweatdrop

3nodding

my friend I feel think that being merry some how make up for self control but the truth is it does not. Us getting merry (at least now would not work). 1 neither of our family cannot afford to not have us live with them. 2 Neither of us are settle in a career and hence can't afford kids. 3 Once merry the expectation I may even say "law" is that you do live together and do have sex and hence children. Given what I said for reasons 1 and 2 marriage between me and my friend would just be a diasaster. And no they aren't willing to just be engage so...  

[The_Pathan]

yeah i get what u mean sweatdrop life's hard.

in the old muslim days, all can afford that stuff wink  

[Twiggy twigs]

But,because of those rules, 2 people who are in love with someone always go out secretly That's haram,right?

But what if the parenst dont give the hand of their daughter to the guy,but they love each other? I know many lovers who had no choice but kidnapping the girl,and then both go to somewhere where they can marry,or the girl runs away...how about that?

Why do i have the feeling that this dont fits this forum sweatdrop  

[The_Pathan]

Don't worry it fits smile

Well, it is haram. If u love someone then love is halal smile But flirting and stuff like that is haram. U could tell ur parrents u wanna marry that person?