The Fire Opal Pub - Sacred Source's Ranting Place

[Jameta]

Nihilistic Seraph

Atma311

I think the stupid speech is good, though. How else would we know who the idiots are and how to avoid them? They pretty much put a sign on their own back saying "I'm not smart enough to socialize with, so please ignore me."

Well put. But just watching that kind of speech can be grating.

Indeed- the idiocy and laziness of it all tends to give me a headache while reading, and another one after finding no sense in the garbled type. xp  

[Keistera]

Porn is interesting, but we won't get into that here. razz

Lately, as in, the past three weeks... people have been trying to convince me that I will change my mind about children, pregnancy, childbirth, babies, and everything in relation to that.

No.

Hell no.

Bugger off, already.

My first nurse said it, my current nurse spent her session trying to tell me I'd change my mind. I get it enough from my mother, why from complete strangers? Why do people seem to think that I, because I'm female, need to breed? Is it so foreign to think that yes, there could be a breed of woman that hates children, and that refuses to give birth? Is it at all possible that, instead of contributing genetically, a woman could pass on knowledge to people that aren't family -- say, through books or as a Professor? Is it so hard to grasp the fact that some people just have no interest in mini-humans and the little vomiting demons called babies?

WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO GRASP!?!

When i was younger, I thought I would want three kids. Then I took sex ed, learned about the whole pregnancy and childbirth thing. That changed my mind immediately. I work in retail, too. I see and hear the fussy babies, toddlers, and teenie-boppers and realize... "Motherhood just isn't for me." I can't begin to imagine having something living inside my body for 9 months, then having to force it out of my body through an undetermined length of time. That scares the hell out of me, and just doesn't seem right.

Yet, no matter what I say, unless I'm really mean and piss people off with what I say, i can't get the message across. Just because I'm 19 doesn't mean I can't make up my mind about what I want to do with my body, or what I don't want to do.

And, I hate to say it, but it's usually people that are mothers that tell me, "Oh, you'll change your mind" or "You'll grow to love children", or something like that. I haven't liked or even loved children for 5 years, nor the idea of raising one. I'm not going to bend because you think I should.

** Before those who love children or are parents jump on my back and start beating me to a bloody pulp, know this: You are not helping those who do not wish to contribute to the population. I admit, yes, I'm being selfish. I wouldn't have it any other way. It is my personal belief that there is no need for me to contribute to an inflated population. What you do with your reproductive organs is your choice, let me have mine. smile

This has been pissing me off... so much.  

[Nihilistic Seraph]

AMEN! I personally would enjoy having a child, but women go through hell to have chidren, and it seems that there's a stereotype that they should WANT to go through hell. It's their choice. They have the power, they should choose wheter or not they want to use it.  

[Jameta]

Hey, just means more kids for me. xd

I mean, more kids to love and such, not birth. confused

And certainly, people need to back-off about such sensitve issues, especially strangers. They should see you as someone making a wise decision, unlike the young whores of the world that use kids as an excuse to be pimped.  

[Siofra Da`Halbria]

Nihilistic Seraph

AMEN! I personally would enjoy having a child, but women go through hell to have chidren, and it seems that there's a stereotype that they should WANT to go through hell. It's their choice. They have the power, they should choose wheter or not they want to use it.

I agree that it is totally your choice. I chose long ago to have children though. Like Seraph said, it will be hell, but I know that it will not last. And I don't want to go through it, but I choose to. And I know that I will have a great guy with me to help me through it.

My best friend has decided that she does not really want children because of the whole pregnancy part, but she does want to have them. She is not sure which way she will decide yet. And what ever she decides, I will support her, because she is my best friend.

As for the bratty kids, I know how you feel. I work in a grocery store, so I hear whining and crying all the time. I am always glad that my mother never let me act like that. And no matter how much I may love my child, nothnig will keep me from spanking them for misbehavior. if I misbehaved as a child, I was spanked. And I learned to be quiet and not whine. And I will make sure my children are well behaved too. I will not hesitate to spank.

Mothers these days are big pansies. Most of them at least. I have seen a few well behaved children, but not many.  

[Keistera]

Siofra Da`Halbria

As for the bratty kids, I know how you feel. I work in a grocery store, so I hear whining and crying all the time. I am always glad that my mother never let me act like that. And no matter how much I may love my child, nothnig will keep me from spanking them for misbehavior. if I misbehaved as a child, I was spanked. And I learned to be quiet and not whine. And I will make sure my children are well behaved too. I will not hesitate to spank.

That's funny, because I work in a grocery store, too. razz

A lot of parents just can't say "No", because they are afraid of depriving their child. By refusing to say "No", one teaches the child that it is he or she that is in control, and not the parent.

As much as Dr. Phil annoys me, he does have good points on child rearing. razz That... bugger. I wasn't spanked, and I turned out just fine (Ok, I was spanked ONCE -- for falling on my arse and screaming for mum instead of father. Mum was stay at home, and he worked all the time -- so it was natural for me to want her instead of him, but he always had a bad temper). My parents set boundaries. I was a well-behaved child anyway, though. O.o;

I really don't think young children should be forced to go to a Grocery or other similar store, where they will sit in the cart for half an hour -- bored to death -- only to cause trouble for themselves and everyone around them. Some childfree restaurants and movie theatres would be nice, too... but everyone would freak about that.

Sorry. ^.^; Thanks for being supportive, guys, I'll stop whining now. blaugh  

[Siofra Da`Halbria]

Jameta has probably already read this in my LJ, but I am posting it here anyways.



So my friend Robert is going to be graduating from Marine Training on September 9th. I really want to go, but it is in San Diego and my mom is in San Francisco. Jacob is going to go, but I know my mom will not let me stay with him. She says it's "inappropriate." OMFG. She has done so many worse things.

Me and Jacob have been together for almost a year and a half. I haven't seen him in almost 6 months. It's not freaking fair. We never get to spend any time together, and now that we both have jobs, we hardly get to talk to each other. And my mom has no sympathy. It's only 3 nights. And we're going to see our friend. If me and Jacob don't go, no one will be there for him. None of our friends have enough money to go. Jacob will have enough in a week or two.

If I did get to go, I would leave Thursday the 8th after school, on Friday the 9th I'd go to his graduation, and I could spend Saturday and Sunday with Rob and Jacob. I would come back to Texas on Sunday to be at school on Monday. It's really not that bad. I am ******** seventeen already! I need a little time parent free. But if I told my mom that, she wouldn't listen. I could save up the money for myself, but you can't buy plane tickets if you're under 18. And I am pretty sure Jacob can't buy it for me because he's not a relative.

I don't know. I need to call the airport and ask. But even if I did get a ticket without my mom's permission, I'd have no way of getting there without her finding out. And if I did get there, it wouldn't be long until she found out. It's just not possible. San Diego is eight hours away from San Francisco. My mom said she might go down there with me. Might. I just can't take that.

I will not let her do this to me. I want to have some fun. She let my sister stay with her guy friend Jacob Connell in I think it was 8th grade. And Ally had a crush on him! Mom says it's different because Jacob didn't like her back. But it's not. Michael got to stay with Barbara and Amber when he was dating them. But mom says that's different too. But it's not. It's not different.

God I just keep crying all of a sudden. It's just not fair. My mom lets my brother and sister do these things, but I can't. I'm not even really younger than Ally! I am a month older than her! It's not my fault I was C-sectioned second. I am older. Not her. I want to have the privileges of being the middle child. I just want to have the rights that my brother and sister have. It's not really that much.

I want to be able to see my boyfriend, to actually talk to him face to face. It's just not the same over the phone. My mom told me that if I want a boyfriend I can see, I should dump Jacob and get one down here. But I can't do that. No matter how hard it may be, I love him too much to do that to him. It just wouldn't be right. I already feel like my heart is breaking constantly. Dumping him would be putting myself through that pain again, but much more seriously than ever before.

When Andy dumped me, I felt my heart break. I still feel it from what he did. It is not as severe as it used to be though. But if I dumped Jacob, I would be inflicting on myself the pain Andy gave to me tenfold. Not to mention how Jacob would feel. He would kill himself. I am the only reason he left the cemetery and went to the hospital that night. I am what made him decide to live. I can't hurt him or myself like that.  

[Jameta]

1.) I don't read LJs. sweatdrop Only dJs.
2.) The only advice I can give is to keep your head up and stay positive. Being negative will only dampen your chances. If it looks pretty grizzly, make Robert something special that Jacob can take to him, so you're their in spirit. No sense in ruining everything for everyone, eh? And maybe you can slip something special for Jacob, too. Keep your heart and mind open for possiblities.
3.) My therapist told/reiterated that parents don't always have common sense and do make mistakes. Perhaps deep down, your mom is just afraid you're growing up too fast, and she's mis-expressing her feelings. Remember, we're always their little girls, and there's nothing in the world real mothers wouldn't give to just hold their children and forget about the troubles of reality. She knows your mature, and she's afraid; it's natural. So keep a cool head, and think about the wonderful things she's given you and the times you've shared. that should help with the 'keeping-positive' thought process.

And I know it's a bit cruel, but remember the phrase, "Distance makes the heart grow fonder." The opportunity will come to see Jacob, so long as you keep believing you will, and if you continue to be mature. heart Don't compare yourself to others- make your own standards and goals.  

[Atma311]

Jameta's right. You'll just to hope your mother comes around. At least you're in the same state. It may be a long drive, but you can certainly get there some way or another. If you lose hope, you'll lose a lot more. Just remember to keep your head in a positive light and you'll be okay. Write him, send e-mails and snail mail, talk to him on the phone, and show him a million different ways that you care 3nodding

We'll support you all the way, so don't lose hope. "Might" is better than "won't", after all.  

[Siofra Da`Halbria]

We don't live in the same state. We live 300 miles apart.  

[Jameta]

Siofra Da`Halbria

We don't live in the same state. We live 300 miles apart.

rofl Sorry, that was funny for some reason. Anyways, don't let that fact stop you from being positive. Sometimes the nicest things are those sent snail-mail. biggrin  

[Siofra Da`Halbria]

Jameta

Siofra Da`Halbria

We don't live in the same state. We live 300 miles apart.

rofl Sorry, that was funny for some reason. Anyways, don't let that fact stop you from being positive. Sometimes the nicest things are those sent snail-mail. biggrin

lol. I am no good at writing letters. And I want to send him cookies (I love baking for him), but they'd be stale by the time they got there.  

[Jameta]

Siofra Da`Halbria

Jameta

Siofra Da`Halbria

We don''t live in the same state. We live 300 miles apart.

rofl Sorry, that was funny for some reason. Anyways, don''t let that fact stop you from being positive. Sometimes the nicest things are those sent snail-mail. biggrin

lol. I am no good at writing letters. And I want to send him cookies (I love baking for him), but they''d be stale by the time they got there.

Not if you send them express. And you don''t have to write him formal-letters: they good simply be free-thought, or you could send him pictures, or little crafty-things.

Smooshy-stuff. 4laugh  

[Siofra Da`Halbria]

Jameta

Siofra Da`Halbria

Jameta

Siofra Da`Halbria

We don''''t live in the same state. We live 300 miles apart.

rofl Sorry, that was funny for some reason. Anyways, don''''t let that fact stop you from being positive. Sometimes the nicest things are those sent snail-mail. biggrin

lol. I am no good at writing letters. And I want to send him cookies (I love baking for him), but they''''d be stale by the time they got there.

Not if you send them express. And you don''''t have to write him formal-letters: they good simply be free-thought, or you could send him pictures, or little crafty-things.

Smooshy-stuff. 4laugh

lol. my cookies go stale after only a few hours gonk but they''re so good when they''re fresh!  

[Jameta]

Send him a picture of cookies, then. It would be funny. 4laugh