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Sonya Khatsworth

PostPosted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 7:35 am


Josie Mir
I don't intend to be cruel, Doomie, but I understand why your parents reacted that way. It's a matter of identity, who your children are, as much as who your peers are. So I can understand easily why your mother might refuse, seeing it as undermining who she is. Not necessarily through malice on your part, but just something she can't do.

I don't know your parents, I don't know if they would be amenable to sitting down and talking. It's worked for me on the difficult issues. That's what I have to suggest. Is it painless? Of course not. Often, if I talked with both my parents about something that bothered me deeply, all three of us would be dipping into the tissues. But what it wasn't, was hostile. We might have seen things differently, very differently, but we still related to each other in the same way, parent and child.


True enough, but it's not like my identity problem's a new issue either, nor would it have been the first time I try to reason with them about it.
In fact, I'm living on my own now in part because I couldn't live with their nonacceptance anymore.

I'm already starting to get called miss or lady left and right (I've not been referred to otherwise all morning yet when I went to do the groceries), and everyone down to even my teachers and doctors call me Doomie or Sonya nowadays. I'd hate for the little bit of contact I have left with my folks to get more tense, but it's been over 6~7 years now.

My dad "declared" to me on the day I came out to him that no doctor would ever see me for it, and yet it's been done. They told me I wouldn't make it out on my own, but I have. They also told me I'd never pass as a girl, but it's already happening.

At this rate, if we go anywhere and they still try to use my birth name, they're just going to get stared at as if they're looking for a lost child or gone crazy as I've also stopped responding to that name.
I mean, what am I supposed to do another year down the line? Stuff my pants and bandage up my breasts like an FtM every time they want to see me or take me to a family reunion? (heck, half of my dad's side of the family knows and they're all cheering me on.)

I know it's hard for them to cope with "losing a son", but they still have a daughter. It's not like I'm dead... which, ironically, might have been the case if I didn't come to terms with myself when I did. Then they would have neither one left.

Anywhoo, I'll be heading to my folks' place this afternoon.
If it becomes too much for me, I'll just call a cab or a friend to pick me up and take me home.
 
PostPosted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 8:35 am


Af Mas
shoki_de_nai
Diana Aries
shoki_de_nai
Well, I won't be doing much traveling for a while. Need to get my car a window first. Some shitface smashed my driver's side window for no apparent reason. It wasn't a car accident; nothing else was damaged and the window was obviously smashed with a large blunt object. It wasn't a robbery; there's never anything in my car, and they didn't even unlock it or anything. Just...smashed it with a bat or something and went along their merry little way. Just mine though, not any of the other cars parked along the street, guess I was lucky.


So I had heard. You sure cannot be going anywhere with the weather as it is with a window missing.

Yeah, the five hour drive home was awesome without a window.

I feel bad for that. Not there was anything we could've done to prevent it or anything, unfortunately, it's just a really bad thing to just randomly happen.

I was totally shocked. I mean, it's not like you live in a bad neighborhood or anything.

Gonna have to make some calls and get price quotes for a new window...I'm sure however much it is, I won't be able to afford it and my bills right now. gonk

shoki_de_nai

Fuzzy Canine

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Af Mas

PostPosted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 9:38 am


shoki_de_nai
Af Mas
shoki_de_nai
Diana Aries
shoki_de_nai
Well, I won't be doing much traveling for a while. Need to get my car a window first. Some shitface smashed my driver's side window for no apparent reason. It wasn't a car accident; nothing else was damaged and the window was obviously smashed with a large blunt object. It wasn't a robbery; there's never anything in my car, and they didn't even unlock it or anything. Just...smashed it with a bat or something and went along their merry little way. Just mine though, not any of the other cars parked along the street, guess I was lucky.


So I had heard. You sure cannot be going anywhere with the weather as it is with a window missing.

Yeah, the five hour drive home was awesome without a window.

I feel bad for that. Not there was anything we could've done to prevent it or anything, unfortunately, it's just a really bad thing to just randomly happen.

I was totally shocked. I mean, it's not like you live in a bad neighborhood or anything.

Gonna have to make some calls and get price quotes for a new window...I'm sure however much it is, I won't be able to afford it and my bills right now. gonk

Yeah, the neighborhood is pretty safe, that shocks me too. Would definitely be something to worn future guests about. Good luck Shoki
PostPosted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 9:40 am


Is it odd that I'm feeling nostalgic over stuff from four years ago? I'm on my old old computer for certain reasons, and looking back at all the photos and art and stuff from that time, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, mostly because the person I am now is not the same as the person as I was then (I was at least 30 lbs thinner then XP)

Af Mas


Josie Mir

PostPosted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 5:53 pm


DoomNeko
Josie Mir
I don't intend to be cruel, Doomie, but I understand why your parents reacted that way. It's a matter of identity, who your children are, as much as who your peers are. So I can understand easily why your mother might refuse, seeing it as undermining who she is. Not necessarily through malice on your part, but just something she can't do.

I don't know your parents, I don't know if they would be amenable to sitting down and talking. It's worked for me on the difficult issues. That's what I have to suggest. Is it painless? Of course not. Often, if I talked with both my parents about something that bothered me deeply, all three of us would be dipping into the tissues. But what it wasn't, was hostile. We might have seen things differently, very differently, but we still related to each other in the same way, parent and child.


True enough, but it's not like my identity problem's a new issue either, nor would it have been the first time I try to reason with them about it.
In fact, I'm living on my own now in part because I couldn't live with their nonacceptance anymore.

I'm already starting to get called miss or lady left and right (I've not been referred to otherwise all morning yet when I went to do the groceries), and everyone down to even my teachers and doctors call me Doomie or Sonya nowadays. I'd hate for the little bit of contact I have left with my folks to get more tense, but it's been over 6~7 years now.

My dad "declared" to me on the day I came out to him that no doctor would ever see me for it, and yet it's been done. They told me I wouldn't make it out on my own, but I have. They also told me I'd never pass as a girl, but it's already happening.

At this rate, if we go anywhere and they still try to use my birth name, they're just going to get stared at as if they're looking for a lost child or gone crazy as I've also stopped responding to that name.
I mean, what am I supposed to do another year down the line? Stuff my pants and bandage up my breasts like an FtM every time they want to see me or take me to a family reunion? (heck, half of my dad's side of the family knows and they're all cheering me on.)

I know it's hard for them to cope with "losing a son", but they still have a daughter. It's not like I'm dead... which, ironically, might have been the case if I didn't come to terms with myself when I did. Then they would have neither one left.

Anywhoo, I'll be heading to my folks' place this afternoon.
If it becomes too much for me, I'll just call a cab or a friend to pick me up and take me home.

It sounds like I missed that they weren't interested in raising you so much as keeping you on a leash. :<
PostPosted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 1:58 am


Af Mas
Is it odd that I'm feeling nostalgic over stuff from four years ago? I'm on my old old computer for certain reasons, and looking back at all the photos and art and stuff from that time, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, mostly because the person I am now is not the same as the person as I was then (I was at least 30 lbs thinner then XP)
Ah nostalgia. It certainly sets you back a time..... 3nodding

Manda_Tifa


Af Mas

PostPosted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 9:39 pm


Manda_Tifa
Af Mas
Is it odd that I'm feeling nostalgic over stuff from four years ago? I'm on my old old computer for certain reasons, and looking back at all the photos and art and stuff from that time, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, mostly because the person I am now is not the same as the person as I was then (I was at least 30 lbs thinner then XP)
Ah nostalgia. It certainly sets you back a time..... 3nodding

I have old art by YOU on this old computer blaugh
PostPosted: Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:37 pm


Af Mas
Manda_Tifa
Af Mas
Is it odd that I'm feeling nostalgic over stuff from four years ago? I'm on my old old computer for certain reasons, and looking back at all the photos and art and stuff from that time, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, mostly because the person I am now is not the same as the person as I was then (I was at least 30 lbs thinner then XP)
Ah nostalgia. It certainly sets you back a time..... 3nodding

I have old art by YOU on this old computer blaugh
No kidding?! Hold on to it, please, my other computer may not be revivable! What is it?

Happy Christmas, everybody! heart

Manda_Tifa


Sunegami

Playful Nerd

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 8:35 am


Merry Christmas, everybody. <3 I'm currently in Arlington, MA, visiting my dad's family.  
PostPosted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 2:58 pm


Manda_Tifa
Af Mas
Manda_Tifa
Af Mas
Is it odd that I'm feeling nostalgic over stuff from four years ago? I'm on my old old computer for certain reasons, and looking back at all the photos and art and stuff from that time, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, mostly because the person I am now is not the same as the person as I was then (I was at least 30 lbs thinner then XP)
Ah nostalgia. It certainly sets you back a time..... 3nodding

I have old art by YOU on this old computer blaugh
No kidding?! Hold on to it, please, my other computer may not be revivable! What is it?

Happy Christmas, everybody! heart

Old pics of my wolf self

Af Mas


Selene Aries

PostPosted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 3:43 pm


Afina. heart
PostPosted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 3:55 pm


*hugs book* My b/f got me "Bat Boy Lives!" and it's got tons of stories from Weekly World News. I does <3 it so

Alektorphobia


Manda_Tifa

PostPosted: Thu Dec 25, 2008 8:28 pm


So MY Christmas was interesting to say the least. I had to work Christmas Eve through to Christmas morn, and camped at the hotel for a few hours since buses don't run on holidays. During my workshift I found out that the general store in the small town I grew up in burned down that evening, and no one could get ahold of the owners because they were away for Christmas!

Got home with the family and did stockings first. I played a practical joke on my brother by stuffing a glob of "Area 51 Alien Goo" into the toe of his stocking, and the prank went over beautifully. He was thoroughly disgusted and amused at the same time, and we all enjoyed a good laugh. Everyone had a FANTASTIC haul this year, and I have to say I'm quite pleased. After stockings Mom and I got dinner started, and we put it in the oven and did presents. I'll post my haul later.

There was about an hour left til dinner, and we were all playing with our new toys when we heard this terrible crash downstairs that shook the entire house. Naturally curious, we all went outside to see the commotion. My landlady, having her own Christmas with her family downstairs, had a guest who's truck came out of park and rolled down our fairly steep driveway and into the house. As if that weren't bad enough, it severed the gas-line. 911 was called, and we were told to evacuate immediately, and by evacuate they meant get the house out of sight. Everything becomes a flurry of motion. In a panick I grab the single most important item to me in the entire apartment, and she did not go without a fight. My cat does NOT like activity, and she hates her box even more. So after several minutes of coaxing, cooing, chasing, and ultimately manhandling her into her tiny crate, I grab a coat and bolt out the door in my slippers. My slippers are work surprisingly well in winter weather.

So there we all are standing on the corner of the street, waiting for the house to blow up in a fiery explosion of toxic terror with my landlady, her family and the neighbors. The fire departmen, the police department, and ambulance, and city vehicles all arrive to block off the street, no one can get through. My family had all grabbed random assortment of items. My brother had grabbed his brand new acoustic bass guitar, my dad had grabbed a shirt my boyfriend had left behind (STILL can't figure out why, out of ALL items, he grabs that, but I'm glad he did), I have my cat in her carrier, and my mom is the ONLY one with the foresight to actually grab winter wear, i.e. boots. My brother wraps the guitar up in the two extra coats we had, and we just mill around for about 45 minutes until I get sick of it and call up the hotel to see about getting a place to hang out for a couple hours. We are all lamenting over our starvation and the fact that we weren't allowed to salvage our dinner (it was such a beautiful turkey dinner, artistically arranged and everything). A coworker is kind enough to leave his home to bring my brother, my cat, and I to the hotel, and mom and dad hang around to see if they can get the car back at all. Just as my coworker drives up to get us, they start letting people back into the house, but I'd already decided that the fumes might be a bit much for Rhapsody (let alone ourselves) and we went to the hotel anyway. Mom and dad were able to salvage dinner, and we finished cooking it here at the hotel using the main kitchen and we had dinner in a guest room. We watched a movie, the family left, and I was at work approximately 7 hours early. As it is, since we were doing Christmas in our PJs, and no one had a chance to really grab anything, I'm now working in my PJs. And loving every minute of that. biggrin

Found out just this evening that my other coworker's car "exploded" (died) as did her cat. What a tragic holiday... neutral

How was everyone elses?
PostPosted: Fri Dec 26, 2008 12:39 pm


Wow, Manda, that's crazy. I hope you get to move back in soon (if you haven't already)!

Christmas was a nice relaxing day. I woke up, ate a croissant that my mate brought home from work the previous night and got ready to go to laundry at the laundromat that said it was free Christmas day. Needless to say, they're liars and they were closed all day. My mate and I were hoping to have pizza in our state of hibernation but grocery stores and pizzerias were closed as well. Christmas ended up with me watching Gilmore Girls all day and him playing Spore with some phone calls here and there for Christmas wishes.

I had my actual Christmas the previous weekend when my mom, her boyfriend, my gram and brother came down to bring us a tree and exchange gifts. It was so much fun, I love having guests, especially when they bring food! Got to go swimming at their hotel as well, which was really nice since the weather was particularly nasty. Tomorrow includes a trip to NJ for Christmas with the future in-laws.

LilKitty115


Sonya Khatsworth

PostPosted: Fri Dec 26, 2008 8:20 pm


So hey, I was bored at my folks place, so in between breakfast and dinner on the 25th, I concocted an LJ account to centralize my stuff.
...but I'm still cross-posting, 'cause I'm a twit like that. 8D
http://khatsworth.livejournal.com

But yeah, that being said, the day's happenings.

So today, 26th of December, I went to pick up my boyfriend at the bus station in Montreal, for what would likely be one of the best weeks ever.
I mean, it's not like we have oodles of events planned ahead or anything, but it's nice to get to spend time together. It's what I've been looking forward to since November, among other things! Well, mostly that.

The ride up north was okay, if monotonous apparently, but otherwise my own trip to Montreal and back was pretty relaxed. Well okay I was anxious as all hell, but y'know what I mean. 8D


Had some pizza on the way back, played some Munchkin, had some hot cocoa (with marshmellows!) and watched Freakazoid 'till exhaustion. Now that's some Christmas activities I can get into. =)
More than anything though, it's nice to be able to spend all this time with him. For all it's worth for geeks like us, or even just for a genetical ******** like me, it's nice to have such a great time. To have... a relationship that doesn't feel awkward or anything. Kinda like normal life.

Not like I'm done with everything yet, but I can finally say I'm getting there.

But for now, I think I'll retreat to the confines of bed for the night.
 
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