201 ΡδρζαΓ

[xDarkWinterx]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
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xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊

xx

Michaxx" Alik " xxPolzin

" Micha poured himself another drink as he listened to Samuel speak. He couldn't help but find it funny knowing it was true. Micha laughed softly knowing that was just part of owning a business. He took a drink from his glass as he stood up from his seat and walked toward the living room. Micha took a seat on his chair as he crossed his legs. "Yeah I know what you mean. Practically anyone and everyone is like that." He spoke shaking his head a little since he had dealt with a few people who were like that. Micha usually ended up throwing them out because he didn't want to hear it. He didn't mind the male's words after all they were helpful in some sense. Micha knew it was better to actually hear it then to ignore it since it would do him no good. "Yeah I know. I usually end up not working with a lot of models especially females. Males I don't mind they are not so narrow minded. Yeah I may consider looking into other areas to sell my work." He spoke as he shifted on the couch again pulling his legs up as he crossed them. Micha hadn't really thought of other areas to sell his work especially since he was just so used to just work in his studio working with families whom came in for their yearly photos or models whom needed their pictures updated as well. "

 

[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" At times Alaine was like an open book to him especially with his words or how he was acting. He wasn't fooled by his words after all he could tell the male was still uncomfortable. Liam looked down at their hands as Alaine placed his hand over his own. He looked back up hearing the male speak, he sighed a little knowing he was doing no good trying to comfort Alaine. Liam nodded slightly as the male spoke knowing it was better to drop it. He felt the male pull away from him as he leaned against the table. Liam saw the male look away from him and shifted in his shirt. He stood up moving around the table toward the male. Liam took a seat next to him not really caring if they were in public. He took one of the male's hands in his own as he held onto it. Liam didn't care if they just sat there he was content with that. He glanced over at the male and smiled a little. "Is there something you've always wanted to do but haven't been able to?" Liam asked curiously trying to get off topic of the male's health after all he could see it was bothering him to be asked about it. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Even though he was glad to have the male agree to give up on his health, he knew it would still be bugging him until he was certain that Alaine was back to his usual self. It was sweet that the male cared so much, but he was a grown man and had been dealing with this for years. When he said he was going to be okay, he would be okay. He'd dealt with worse pains than this in his lifetime. As he turned back to the male and saw him get up, for a moment, he wondered had he said too much and pissed him off by asking him not to worry. He watched cautiously as the male rose from his seat, moving around the table and taking a seat beside him, curious to know what he might do. He allowed the male to take his hand, lacing his fingers through the males and returning his gentle smile only to have it falter moments later. He blinked, staring curiously at the male. No one had ever asked him such a question so he wasn't quite sure how to answer. Alaine looked away from the male, staring down at his lap, 'Something I've always wanted.', he thought. There were plenty of things he wanted to do in life but was never given a choice about it. The freedom to love, to be feel like he's not constantly being watched, to not have his insecurities dictate his life. Those would be nice. But it wasn't exactly something he wanted, those kinds of things were more along the lines of what he needed. Or what he thought he needed. "Does it have to be just one thing or can it be more than one?" he replied.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" As he sat next to Alaine he figured asking questions was better than sitting in silence. He felt Alaine lace his fingers with his own. Liam looked up at the male only to see his smile disappear. He wondered if he had said something wrong after all that wasn't his intention. Liam hadn't realized that the question would have an affect on Alaine. He watched as Alaine looked away from him. Liam waited patiently to see if the male would answer him or simply ignore the question. After awhile he heard Alaine speak and glanced over at him. "No. I guess it can be more than one thing." Liam spoke smiling at the male glad he had chosen to answer his question. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine smiled as the male gave him the okay to be choosy. He looked down at his lap in thought, trying to think of something he'd really wanted but could never have or do. Plenty of things came to mind, but he wasn't exactly sure what to say. After a few moments trapped in thought, he looked back to the male, sighing. "If anything, I want my peace of mind back." he said, quietly. "I wanna not fear people, I wanna hurt my priest and ex-boyfriends for hurting me.....I wanna break the chains that have been holding me back for over a decade. I wanna keep this feeling; when I'm around you or Sam, I'm fine, like I'm my old self again. But with strangers or clients, I can't do it, I can't function properly. I'm scared, nervous, I can't do anything right. I hate this weakness.....I want it gone." As he spoke, he knew he sounded a bit like a whining brat, wanting something that he could possibly never get back. His wounds ran too deep and were likely never to heal. He'd gotten somewhat better through the years, but in certain situations he was still quite shaken. He knew this, but liked to think at some point he would be able to get past it all. He laid his head on the males shoulder so he could avoid his gaze. "Now your turn, what do you want?" he asked, wanting to hear what the male might have to say before going into any kind of discussion about what he just said.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam waited for Alaine to speak. It appeared that he was deep in thought about which words to choose and how to express his feelings for each of them. He didn't mind waiting for an answer after all he had all the time in the world. Liam was content just sitting there with Alaine after all it was better to be speaking about something then sitting in silence. He finally saw Alaine look up at him hearing him sigh as he started to speak. Liam wasn't surprised by Alaine's words after all he only knew what Sam had told him about Alaine. He didn't mind Alaine's words after all anyone who had dealt with such things would want them to disappear. Liam smiled at Alaine as he laid his head on his shoulder. He squeezed Alaine's hand slightly as he spoke. There wasn't a lot that Liam wanted either, only a few. "I think I would like to be able to love someone and have them love me back. I want a long term relationship that doesn't just last two months." He spoke softly as he tried to think if there was anything else that he would like. Liam had only been in a few relationships none of them lasting long or amounting to love. He hated the idea at times of being alone he wasn't the type of person to like being alone either. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Samuel Joshua Davidson
“The truth is messy. It's raw and uncomfortable. You can't blame people for preferring lies.”

The longer he talked to the male, the more he was getting used to hearing the male moving around. Whatever he was doing, was none of his business nor did he truly care to find out. The soft clinking and sounds of heavy glass thudding made him suspicious that the man might be drinking again. He knew the male had drunk alot while at the club, but whatever he did at home was his business and didn't concern him. He shook his head as the male agreed with him, knowing his words to be true. Gotta love those rich bastards in this city, they get a little money and think they own everything. How he'd love to just spit in their drinks and ban them for life. Unfortunately, he didn't need a lawsuit on his hands and throwing them out was the most he could do. He smirked as the male continued to speak, oh how he wished he could have some of the men he worked with. All the men Sam had to deal with were wanna-be players or dumbass jocks trying to show off to other jocks, the idiotic scene kids, and whatever other mess crawls into his club. On a bad day, he had a right mind to up the age limit; twenty-one and over sounded good. Twenty-five and over sounded even better. Sadly though, it was too late for that. Knocking the age limit would lose half his clientele and mean he'd have to fire a third of his staff. He nodded as the male went on, knowing he couldn't see what he was doing. "If the whiny models get on your nerves there's always landscape or random urban stuff you could do. Some of the best expressions can come from the people who aren't even aware of having they're having their pictures taken.Just something to think about." he said. He was glad the male would think about everything he'd told him thus far, if he was a good rookie, he'd hate to see him give up over a few dumb newbs.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Closing his eyes as he leaned against the male, he felt the male squeeze his hand. He tilted his head a bit to the side and pressed a kiss to Liam's cheek in thanks. He was glad to be able to talk to the male like this, to be so open and honest, and not worry about petty judgement like he'd received from plenty of others. After asking the male what he wanted, he couldn't help smiling at his response. "Isn't that something we all want though?" he asked curiously. "Find that one "perfect true love" and have that happily ever after." Alaine would be lying if he said he didn't want that as well. He'd love to find someone and be able to have a lasting relationship with them that didn't end in heartache and other unpleasantness. He was tired of meaningless sex and wanted to experience real love instead of this drunken lust. As he thought about it, he started to wonder, opening his eyes again, he glanced up at the male. "Hey, I've got a personal question and you don't have to answer if you don't wanna. But, are you a virgin?" he asked curiously. He didn't expect an answer and would understand if the male didn't want to answer. It was just, Liam was already quite aware that he was no virgin, and where this relationship might go he wasn't sure, but he was curious nonetheless.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" The perfect fairy tale on everyone's list was to love and be loved back. He knew it probably sounded stupid of him to think that way but in life he was probably asking for to much. Liam had only been in a couple of relationships some good while others were bad. There had been been a few people he had thought he loved but that was perhaps he loved to easily and to fast. He felt Alaine move next to him as he kissed his cheek. Liam saw no reason to judge the male after all in a relationship people were supposed to be honest with each other. He didn't want Alaine to hide who he was in front of him after all it was just who he was. Liam smiled as Alaine spoke "Yes. It is." He spoke hearing the male speak again. Finding love and being loved was practically everyone's wish especially those who would admit it. Liam felt Alaine shift next to him again and looked over at him. He could tell the male wanted to ask him something but he didn't know what. Liam hadn't expected the question the male asked but it was a reasonable question. "I don't mind answering, but no I'm not a virgin." He spoke smiling at the male. Liam had been with a couple of guys in his life. He didn't know why Alaine had asked such a question but he wasn't bothered by it. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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It was hard to say if he really believed in love or not. After the way all his relationships ended, it was hard to say. It was like his heart was conflicted; he wanted to believe in that one perfect love, while at the same he thought that it was all a hoax and such a thing didn't exist. Honestly, he wasn't sure which he was really for. For the moment though, he was trying not to think about either of those feeling and just focus on the relationship he was trying to start now with Liam. He liked the male and didn't mind going out with him. He found the male to be rather interesting and liked his teasing demeanor, finding it to be both amusing and rather cute. He sighed as the male agreed with him. Wanting love was apart of human nature. It was inevitable for someone to not ever want any attention, to just once experience the gentleness of being with another. As the male went on to answer his question, he nodded in response. He knew it was an odd thing to ask, but it was a conversation starter. It wasn't like either of them had given many details on their previous relationships. Though to be honest, Alaine didn't give two shits whether the male wanted to know or not. He wasn't very big on the whole "What went wrong and why are you single" stories. Thanks to Samuel and his lovely big mouth, it was rather obvious what went wrong and why he was single. But he didn't know that much about Liam or his personal life. Though to be fair, he didn't really know ho to ask either, so it wasn't as though the male wasn't telling him.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Talking about himself was never a problem but he would only give information if it was asked. Between the two of them they hadn't really talked about past relationships. He knew a little of what Alaine had gone through relationship wise which he only got from Sam because he didn't think Alaine would ever tell him. Liam had only been with about three or four people if that. He didn't know if talking about past relationships was a good idea especially now that he was with Alaine. Now that Alaine brought up the question of him being a virgin he felt like he had to tell now. Liam shifted next to Alaine as he looked over at him, "I've only been with a couple of guys before three or four if that." He spoke a little embarrassed since he didn't know how much Alaine had been with but he didn't care either way. "The only reason they didn't last long was because they only wanted sex." Liam spoke shyly, he was comfortable with his sexuality but that didn't mean he just wanted sex. He sighed a little not sure if Alaine wanted to know this but he felt like he should tell him. Liam grabbed his drink from across the table and took a sip. They had already talked about not just wanting sex which it why he was glad that they had already come to an agreement on it. He preferred to have a relationship not friends with benefits. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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It wasn't like Alaine was uncomfortable about talking about his past relationships, but if the male was wanting explicit details it was a no-go. He'd told that to the police more times then he cared to admit. Not that he thought the male would want to know those kinds of things to begin with, but still, one could never be too sure. He looked down at the male, sitting up as he felt him shift beside him. Looking at him curiously before he spoke. He could tell the male was embarrassed and wondered what it was he had to tell him. When the male did speak, he nodded. He hadn't asked the male about his sex life, but it seemed he was about to find out. If it gave him a better insight about the male, he didn't mind, at least it let him know his boyfriend wasn't a slut. He listened as the male went on, telling him why his relationships didn't last, and that was where he worried. He could understand not wanting a relationship that was entirely about sex, but sadly, sex was one of his major outlets and could honestly say he'd had his share of relationships that were just that. Samuel having been one of his more physical relations. "Guess that makes me a slut." he replied, keeping his voice low so only Liam could hear. He didn't need the entire restaurant knowing his sex life. "My last few relationships were nothing but physical. Just for future reference, you should probably know, I have two rules; one, I never touch anyone who refuses to use a condom. And two, I never touch anyone who doesn't have proof that they're clean. I've already had my share of STD's and trust it wasn't fun." It wasn't like he was planning on sleeping with Liam this week, or right after their date, but he didn't mind knowing the males past. At least if he had something he could warn him and let him know ahead of time. Alaine had gotten a good share of his crud through the years. Sure using a condom was a pain and a complete mood killer, but honestly, he'd rather go through the annoyance of using one than go through the annoyance that could be a burning a*****e and an itchy d**k. No man, nor woman for that matter was worth that little hell.


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[xDarkWinterx]

Lιαϻ Ӎαттнεω Lαɴεxxxxxxx
ʟιғε ιs α ραятӌ…sσ ωε ϻιɢнт αs ωεʟʟ ɖαɴcε.

" Liam wasn't a prude with sex that it bothered him. He just didn't think a relationship had to just be that. Liam knew what Alaine had done and he was past that. He didn't care if his boyfriend had slept around before. Liam liked Alaine but just didn't want their relationship to be about sex. In his past relationships the men only wanted sex it seemed they wanted it 24/7 and he wasn't willing. He heard the male speak softly just enough for him to hear. Liam didn't think of Alaine as a slut sure before going out with him he knew he had slept around but it didn't bother him especially since he barely knew him. "I don't think your a slut Alaine. Perhaps your just more experienced than I am." He spoke smiling at the male after all he didn't want the male to think he thought poorly of him just because he had slept around. Liam continued to listen to Alaine not bothered by his rules. He stared at the male curiously he had never really had an STD test before but with all the men he wore condoms. Liam could understand not wanting to get an STD after all Alaine had slept with multiple people. "I don't mind sex I just don't want sex to be something that revolves around our relationship.. Also condoms are fine... and I'm willing to get tested before we even do anything." He spoke as he looked over at Alaine. Liam had never been tested before but if Alaine needed that proof before they moved onto a more physical relationship he was fine with that. "

 

[xDarkWinterx]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊There is darkness in us all.┊
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xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx┊But with darkness there's light.┊

xx

Michaxx" Alik " xxPolzin

" Most of Micha's work revolved around landscape. He preferred to not work with people at times and just take pictures of whatever he thought looked good. Micha had wanted to branch out which it why he took up taking pictures of models. Sometimes it was a good thing and helped him while other times it made him wonder why he did this. He didn't have any other passions in life really so photography worked for him even if it was frustrating at times. Micha set his glass on the table not really in the mood to drink anymore. It was getting late and he was probably going to have a major hang over in the morning if he drank to much more. He heard Samuel speak he found the male to be rather honest at times with things that he did or spoke about. Micha didn't mind the honesty after all it was better than lies. "Actually most of my pictures are of landscape. I started with landscape then moved onto models... though sometimes I wonder why I did." He spoke sighing a little as he leaned his head back against the couch. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Ạᶅαιие ᴄɦɋмβеяѕ
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

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Alaine knew having rules could be a serious mood killer, but he didn't care. Sex was his outlet; it let out his frustrations, helped him get over his fears, and made him forget all about unwanted memories that haunted him. It wasn't the best outlet, but an outlet nonetheless, and far better than how he was doing a few years ago; by keeping everything bottled up until the point that he would just break down. Since he'd prefer not being a ticking time bomb, at the time that was the only option he could think of. Although he'd been slightly joking when he called himself, he was also somewhat serious. Think about what he wasn't telling the male. He didn't say how long he stayed with those people, whether they were male or female, how many times he saw them. The only difference between himself and a whore was he never made a penny and made it a point that he was always on top. If someone demanded he be a bottom, he simply left. With only two people had he ever willingly been a bottom. He again looked down at the as he spoke, his voice almost as quiet as his own. He couldn't help in smirking at his remark, both amused and relieved that the male didn't think him as such. "Hmm, nice to know one of my lovers at least thinks so." he replied, holding back bitter laughter that threatened to erupt. Alaine was nearly immune to being called a slut, a lot of his past lovers called him that when things turned bitter or they weren't doing things their way. He didn't care really but now and again it would still sting if he thought long and hard enough about it. As the male spoke again, he nodded. He wasn't such an animal he needed to be laid all the time, if worse came to worse there was always his mistress, his left hand. "It's not like I'm ordering you to go out and get it now. This may come as a shock, but I do have some self control. Besides it's only our second date, and we've just barely made it past first base. When I'm in an actual relationship, I prefer to take things slow and get to know the person before I hop into bed. I just thought I'd tell you so you knew a bit of what you were getting into." he said. Even though he'd like to know the male was clean, he didn't need to know, say in the next twenty-four hours. "So what about you, got any little habits or nit picks you just have to have in a relationship?"


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