stoner quotes

[Bonquchko]

This happened to me before
Me-"Wha...?"

Friend-"Yo..."

Me-"I know..."

Friend-"Yep..."

Me-"Wait... Did you say something?"

Friend-"...I dunno... Did you?"

Then, oh how we did lawl...  

[butsnif]

Bonquchko

Me and my friend were sitting in my garage, smoking a bowl. He passes it to me and I just stare at it like I don't know what I'm supposed to do. He looks at me and asks, "Yo, dude, you got it?"

And I look up at him and I said, "Dude...Is Morgan Freeman REALLY God?"

Because I had been thinking that if God took a physical form, it'd be Morgan Freeman

yeh but he shags his own grandaughter...or something  

[butsnif]

Barthalomaus

"You guys are like...my subconcious...please dont take over my mind..."
Haha my friends and I were completely stoned and shroomin and I said that to them as were walking through some forest at like midnight.

ha thats just remeinded me of a time on salvia and wandering round my friends party goin "the brain is a soft crystal" to anyone who would listen  

[Obiwan katokey]

so yesterday my friend tripped me and i dropped my pipe (luckily it didnt break) but i was so pissed and stoned that all i could think to say as far as cussing him out was "you son of a cocking b***h" yeah even i laughed after i said it  

[l u c i d x d r e a m s]

me- "OH s**t MAKE IT STOP"
friend- "I CANT WERE OUT OF CONTROL!"
me- "OH GOD WERE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEEE"
*commence laughing for rest of ride*
my friend and I were on a carousal
and it was a two story one,
and i was on the top on the outside looking down shitting brix
and she was next to me  

[-Pinky- -Boy-]

Earlier, after I added to the pile of clean clothes:

Me: Bleh, I wish we had a clothes-folding machine.
Him: ...Rrrreally?
Me: Yeah, it would be awesome, just throw your clothes in, turn it on, and they come out folded.
Him: Ooh, that kind of machine...
Me: Yeah... You should find out if it exists already or not, 'cuz like, I'll go to college for engineering and I'll freakin' make one. Then we'll be riiiich.
Him: lolol
(Yes, we say 'l-o-l' irl. XD )  

[Obiwan katokey]

-Pinky- -Boy-

Earlier, after I added to the pile of clean clothes:

Me: Bleh, I wish we had a clothes-folding machine.
Him: ...Rrrreally?
Me: Yeah, it would be awesome, just throw your clothes in, turn it on, and they come out folded.
Him: Ooh, that kind of machine...
Me: Yeah... You should find out if it exists already or not, 'cuz like, I'll go to college for engineering and I'll freakin' make one. Then we'll be riiiich.
Him: lolol
(Yes, we say 'l-o-l' irl. XD )

they do have those...they're called maids lol  

[Propaganda Americana]

Im usually good about not saying stupid things, but the one time I said I could hear my bird barking did make everyone laugh.

 

[Obiwan katokey]

so my friend was playing blazing angels for the wii and was on the mission where you had to literally fly through a canyon, though it was more like a large crack, in the middle of a glacier in order to bomb a nazi base. so he was as he was going around bends in the canyon and i was giving commentary for some reason. and i was like "ok you made it around the corner now straight ahead for a little bit, ok now turn left. ohhhh your gunna hit the wall!!! never mind." and then in a totally matter of fact tone i said "oh s**t your ******** he hit the wall. and then i thought was the funniest thing and started giggling and couldnt stop. i guess it was one of those things that you had to be there and had ti be really baked to understand  

[Obiwan katokey]

i was looking for my ipod charger in my bottomless pit of a room and for some unknown reason just turned around and there it was on my desk. so i picked it up and stared at it for few seconds then was like, "uhhhhmmm.....mhhhhmmm....yaaaaaaay.....i found it"