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Friend of ours who works in Champaign did the following experiment yesterday:
Yesterday on my way to lunch at Doe's, I passed one of the homeless guys in that
area, with a sign that read 'Vote Obama, I need the money.'
Once in Doe's my waiter had on an 'Obama '08' tee shirt.
When the bill came, I decided not to tip the waiter and explained to him while he
had given me exceptional service, that his tee shirt made me feel he obviously
believes in Senator Obama's plan to redistribute the wealth. I told him I was
going to redistribute his tip to someone that I deemed more in need--the homeless
guy outside. He stood there in disbelief and angrily stormed away.
I went outside, gave the homeless guy $3 and told him to thank the waiter inside,
as I had decided he could use the money more. The homeless guy looked at me in
disbelief but seemed grateful.
As I got in my truck, I realized this rather unscientific redistribution experiment
had left the homeless guy quite happy for the money he did not earn, but the waiter
was pissed that I gave away the money he did earn.
Well, I guess this redistribution of wealth is going to take a while to catch on, especially with those doing the work.
Arthur (Harley)Davidson, died and went to heaven.
At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."
Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God."
St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.
God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley Davidson motorcycle?"
Arthur said, "Yep, that's me."
God said, "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?"
Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally he said, "Excuse me, but aren't You the inventor of woman?"
God said, "Yes."
"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention:
1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusions;
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds;
3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much;
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust;
5. And the maintenance costs are enormous!"
"Hmmm, you have some good points there," replied God, "hold on." God went to His Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.
"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."
A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"
"Of course child. What may I do for you?"
"Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my Mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?"
"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."
"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."
When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"
"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare."
The official thought this answer strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"
"I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a w oman, but which is, to date, unused."
Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father. Next!"
Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this: The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.
So, that's what they decided to do.
The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. "Since you are all such good customers," he said, "I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20."Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free. But what about the other six men - the paying customers? How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?'
They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay.
And so:
The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33&#xsa;vings).
The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28&#xsa;vings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 ( 25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 ( 22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.
"I only got a dollar out of the $20,"declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man," but he got $10!"
"Yeah, that's right," exclaimed the fifth man. "I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I!"
"That's true!!" shouted the seventh man. "Why should he get $10 back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!"
"Wait a minute," yelled the first four men in unison. "We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!"
The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.
The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!
And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.
For those who understand, no explanation is needed.
For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.
In order to stimulate the pub's business and beer consumption, the publican decides to GIVE $20 each to the BOTTOM poorest 5 guys.
Now even though the richest guy is now buying beer for himself in a beer tax haven, all the remaining guys will now still be able to buy beer.
The publican thinks he can run at a loss, or DEFICIT for a while, and pay the beer subsidy with his overdraft.
So he gives the poorest 5 guys each $20 cash. The bottle shop down the road has a special on imported beers so they all go there and buy imported beer.
RESULT.
The poor spend the "economic stimulus" money heavily on imported consumer goods eg here imported beer. Short term retail stimulus.
The publican in this example goes broke having the bank foreclose of him and having his richest customers in the tax haven pub across the lake. No more pub, no more beer. There is still imported beer though.
Some guys can still afford beer though but not as much and it is more expensive ie imported and no longer on "special".
The five poorest guys used to work at the brewery and most are now out of work. But they still buy beer using their unemployment cheques.
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