Dear Nosgoth (Serious topic)

[Samt03]

I'm linking my friends list to this so they can see what's going on, as we're private they can't post in it however.

I can't think of how to word this other then bluntly.

I need some time without having to worry about everyone and everything. I need some time where people stop coming to me for mod issues.

I've been working full time still, moding, and I started classes, which you know. The issue is I'm stressing myself out to the point where I've lost 10 pounds so far, it wouldn't be that big of deal except for the fact that I weighted around 100 pounds before this all started.

I was having enough issues getting everything I needed done before now, and I just can't manage it anymore.


I had time to think, a lot of time yesterday.

Around 11 my mother-in-law called to say my husband's father was rushed to the hospital after almost fully severing his finger while at work. My husband and I spent from 2pm-9:30pm yesterday in the hospital with them. He's got more surgery scheduled for later this week to see if they can fix his thumb. My husband is with him right now, I stayed home since I was to sick to even go to class today. I almost fainted at one point while in the hospital. And I'm having issues keeping food down now.


However, it gave me time to think, to prioritize. I'm hurting myself physically and mentally staying on Gaia right now. I'm killing myself every week trying to keep myself a mod, it's draining me more then it should. I'm not getting the grades I want in classes. And I've all but stopped eating more then one meal.

The one time I did manage to eat normally was when I wasn't worried about moding, when I had a guest from out of state down.


I am not resigning my mod status, I'm just taking a two week break from worrying about it to see if it helps at all, if it doesn't then I'll do the right thing and quit fully.


I just can't keep doing what I'm doing now, it hurts me both physically and emotionally. I feel like a part of me is breaking right now, but I just don't want to vanish like I have in the past.


I'm closing my profile from public view for the next two weeks and setting myself as 'offline' I'll still log in, in the morning to check my PMs but that will probably be about it.


I can't just 'get on Kain' and vanish anymore, to many people know he is me and come to him for mod questions. I'll still be around on Gaia, just on an account none of you know. It's a mule I've had forever I keep it separate just in case I need me time. I just wanna be able to sign in, bump, talk to people and not have to worry if someone's going to pm me with issues.



To my crew & Kitty: I love you guys but I need some me time. We've got a good active crew so the guild should survive. Please leave me as crew and Kain as Vice Captain, I'll be back in one form or another, I just need relaxation time.


To Nosgoth: Please forgive me if you can.  

[Seraphim Skye]

You don't need to be forgiven Sam, you haven't done anything wrong.

Real life is far more important then stuff here.
Just take care of yourself, okay?  

[ArkRaptor]

Hey, if you need to take a hiatus from the 'net/mod work, then do so.

Your real personal life should come first, not a silly avatar/forum site.

We'll hold down the fort while you're takin' some down time.
No worries.

 

[Silas Parrish]

Cheese and rice, Sam...there's nothing to apologize for! Gaia's not "end-of-the-world" important. I haven't been here long, but I know that real life has a way of creeping into things like the Guilds smile Let your conscience be clear, and go take care of business!  

[Scrab Demon]

*hugs* It's perfectly fine, Sam! You take the time you need to feel better. Your health takes priority over everything else.

I realize I'm taking an unintentional hiatus myself so...  

[Chryssta]

Well, least I'll still see you on school days. Hey, we gotta go back to the river too. I found a faster way there. And I got hiking boots too!  

[Bluetabbycat]

Don't worry about it! Gaia really isn't that important!

Take whatever time off you need, we'll still be here when you come back. 3nodding  

[Samt03]

Update on Father in law for those concerned: Surgery went well, they took a graph off his leg and were able to repair his finger, not sure of mobility yet.

X-posted to the HOT I'm in.  

[Queen Sarafina]

Glad the surgery went well and don't sweat it, nothing wrong with taking a break 3nodding Hope things get better for you and your Father in law.