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 Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 9:39 pm
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AMITYVILLE ACADEMY ENROLLMENT FORM
Name: Id
Nicknames: n/a
Gender: female
Age:17 (but frequently behaves more immaturely)
Faction: Monster
Race: Mothman (Mothgirl?)
Natural Ability:
As a moth, Id has the penchant for eating everything and a cast iron stomach. She can chew through just about any organic material.
Personality:
Poor Id isn't much of a fighter...and not of much use at really anything at all. She is impulsive, carefree, and very demanding. She loves gossip and drama, which she is naturally drawn to, and shouldn't be trusted to keep secrets.
Despite her imperfections, Id makes a great friend. While she is quick to anger, she easily forgives and can't hold a grudge for very long. For the most part, Id is positive and upbeat, and makes a great listener. She has no inclinations towards romance, at least for now.
"Hey! Hey! Watch this! ...Are you watching me?"
Id loves to fly and stretch her wings, and isn't above showing them off. Although appearing teenaged, she sometimes acts like a child when she doesn't have her needs met right now...especially when it comes to food and attention from others. She has very little sense of dignity or class.
"Are you gonna eat that?"
Id loves to eat, and she can easily pack away meals meant for monsters several times her size. In accordance with many of her moth brethren, she can devour pretty much everything...including the clothes from other students' backs.
"Let's do this!"
She has a fondness for pets, and relates to them well...probably, as some people joke, because she is on their level of intelligence. Id is up for adventure at any point in the day, and loves to stay active, and has no problem rough housing with monsters twice her size.
Why are they enrolled in Amityville Academy?
Id poofed into existence quite recently. Mothmen are naturally drawn to disaster, devastation, and woe, so a highschool is clearly the best place for her to be. She's pretty dazed and confused, but she's also hoping to learn a few things about this fantastic, terrifying world of Halloween...
FEAR Ability: Sonic wing beat: the tiny 'scales' on Id's wings move against each other and create a high pitched squeal when she rubs her wings together very quickly, confusing and irritating enemies. Falls under The Mind (Offensive)
Physical Description:
Eye Colour: Entirely black, oversized almond shaped eyes...almost beetle-like. They glow red on occasion.
Hair Colour/Style: white/pale grey, wavy, falls a bit past her shoulders...sometimes braided
Skin Colour: Medium grey
Clothing Style/Colours: Her clothing is simple (well, at least for her first year!). She wears a dark violet and black high necked sleeveless shirt, with her skull pin on her left breast. Across her waist there are two thin belts. She also wears a short white tennis-like-skirt, over black lycra shorts that reach down just above her knees. Although she would prefer to go without shoes, she'll wear black flip-flops if she must.
Extra: Id has a top and bottom set of moth-like wings that are large enough to support her weight. She also has a set of dark moth antennae, which tend to move as she emotes...much like a dog's ears. Id also has lovely, long, black, extra-sharp teeth.
References: Super sketch temp reference...WIP
(note: I am completely new at role play! So if I'm going in the wrong direction, making big mistakes, or being an overall idiot, please feel free to correct me!)
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:30 pm
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Hey there Tortilla! Here to offer some crits! heart
First off, so far Id sounds pretty fun. A little childish, but in a really cute way. I like the idea of her being a bit 'immature' (demanding, short attention span, etc.) and really hope you keep that idea. Having a personality like this will keep her busy and interested in various things, which will give you lots of fun ideas to play around and rp with. (She'll be able to talk to different people and since seems naturally curious, she'll flock to anybody that's around.)
But, with that all said, her physical design and her race don't match up. She's got a moth persona and while that's really cool, demons tend to look more... Well, demon-like.
Now, I have a suggestion. Perhaps try dropping the 'Ego Sprite' idea and have be a 'Moth Man' type character. If you don't know what the Moth Man is (sorry if you do!), but read this wiki article here for more info! The thing about demons is they're very conniving and most always come from big families. Id seems a bit more innocent in that regard. Plus her backstory doesn't involve a family and I think it would be easier on you if she was a monster/ moth man (girl?). Demons can get pretty messy and tied up in strings pretty quickly and since this is your first foray into rp'ing, its best to start simple.
(With this suggestion you might be dropping the 'desire' angle, but once you get into the swing of things you can try again for a character that is more geared in that direction. But mostly what I'm trying to get across are the conflicting 'demon' and 'moth' ideas. For a desire demon, you're slightly veering into the idea of a succbus/ incubus, so I'd say choose one or the other.
Personally, I love the moth. She's cute and I like her FEAR. Plus I don't think we have any Moth Man characters!)
Another suggestion is her FEAR growth. What does her FEAR begin as? (Think small for First Year!) What does it eventually turn into? Try making a year-by-year plan as expounding on it. Don't go too overboard, but definitely make a game plan.
My final suggestion is the organization of your personality section. The "Are you gonna eat that?" and "Hey!..." sections don't really correspond with what you've written below. For "Hey!..." you would describe how Id is maybe a ham in public or a bit of a showboat. Maybe try renaming your sections and adding what corresponds with the personality traits, or take them out altogether and instead focus on a single, cohesive picture of her personality.
Whew! Sorry if that's a bit much, but she's got some potential and I like her mothiness. wink If any of that doesn't make sense or you'd like more detail, don't be afraid to ask. Hope I helped some!
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:52 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:20 pm
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