((Belated solo yay))

When some of the horsemen had come back he had been frantic. Oh, he did his best not to actually show it, calmly moving through the ranks, talking to those he knew, offering support to a few and directions to many. Some of his clan recognized him, if they did not actually know him they recognized that he was a guardian, and therefore there was some responsibility pushed off to him. And he sank into the role easily, providing what help he could as he queried after his priestess.

With every person that reported that they had not seen Ástríđr a little more of his hope was carved away. Oh it was true she could still be around, but surely he would have found some sign of her. Something. She had told him to move on, she had acted like she could be fine, but if she could and had not? The idea hurt him more than anything else. He would give anything to have one more day with her. He would gladly exchange their places, not simply because she was a priestess and it was his duty but because it was Ástríđr.

Then he stumbled upon Æsa he couldn’t hold back his grin. The mare was one that he truly considered his friend, a mare that he had trained with, slept with as well, and yet still they managed to just remain friends. Long past when he had become a guardian they had met up, sharing a bottle of apple cider and swapping stories. Ástríđr had all but shoved him out the door at times, telling him to meet up with the other mare just so that he wasn’t lurking in their home all the time, especially if she was in the middle of complex research and didn’t want to be distracted. Æsa had been one that he had mourned, and if he happened to pick her up in a swooping hug her startled laughter was all that he really wanted to hear.

Well, almost all. “Have you seen Ástríđr?” He couldn’t have stopped the words if he had tried, and she understood. He could see it in her eyes even before her mouth opened, the understand, the sympathy, the pity. Anyone else and he might have snapped at them, but Æsa? There was the fact that she would have kneed him in the balls if he had, but also he didn’t want to. But rather than stop her from speaking he braced himself, forcing himself to hear her words.

“I haven’t seen her Sören. But here, look at you! You look well. Adjusted. Are you one of the ones that survived?” He nodded and she looked thoughtful. ”Good, you can get me settled in. Tell me all about this place. Who do I need to know, what sort of mess are we dealing with, when do we get to slaughter the filthy hunters that did this to us?”

“Yeah. Things are different. Clans mingle now, there were too few of us. There are missions available all the time to go collect Fear but not enough chances to slaughter hunters.”

“How very concise of you. Please tell me you didn’t reverting to your caveman methods. You know she wouldn’t like that.” He glowered at her, but she was one of the few he would ever allow to talk about his priestess like that. She had known her; they had been friends, not incredibly close but close enough. Ástríđr had liked having company, had delighted in knowing those that Sören knew and liked. Someone from those years where he had been in training and she had not known him, someone able to shed some light on how he acted and all the stories that he would love to keep hidden? Ástríđr had flat out loved Æsa. And Æsa had been a good enough friend that she hadn’t completely thrown him under a herd either.

“Come on, I’ll help get you settled.”

She sighed and he knew that he wasn’t fooling anyone, but that was okay. So long as for now they both left well enough alone he didn’t want to bother with it. “Hey, I’ll keep an eye out for her, alright? And I’ll spread the word. Soldiers are more than willing to help out a guardian and his priestess. Either way you should have news by tomorrow.”

“Thanks.”

“I think I saw your mother though. I know you guys aren’t close but in times like these…do you want me to send her your way if I see her again?”

He thought about that for a moment. His mother. He did not exactly want to see her, they had had nothing to do with each for years, but now? “If she wants to find me she can, I’m not hiding.” He would make no effort to seek her out. All she would truly care about was status and her own comfort, perhaps in using him to find a job. He did not need that. He could deal with it though, but he refused to go looking for trouble.

The pair moved on, Sören helping to get Æsa settled, knowing deep down that he would not find his priestess no matter how long he looked. She had not made it back.