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 Posted: Sun Apr 23, 2017 5:25 pm
"Shiloh," said Aleksy. He paused there. He was twenty-six, a good six years older than Shiloh, a grown man and a small business owner and all kinds of responsible. Snapping back like an upset teenager at the upset teenager would be counterproductive. He was better than that. He was a champion soother of upset pod people. "You were just driving," he said, "and no one is dead. Nothing has even exploded. I think you were functioning quite capably."
He changed position, unbuckling his seatbelt to face Shiloh. His serious face was on. It was very serious, straight brows, line face and all. "The Shiloh I knew was having a difficult time as well," he said. "He often felt he was wasting his time and money in school. He didn't know why he bothered going when he had such a hard time with the material. We spoke of it often. I think you will agree that we often speak frankly to each other? It was the same with him.
"It does not matter if you feel overwhelmed or want to quit sometimes. Life is hard and stupid like this, yes? It lets you become comfortable and then steals your rug. It is what it is. But you are doing everything you can and that is all you can ask of yourself. You are doing the best you can with your cards deck, and I am proud of you."
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Posted: Sun Apr 23, 2017 8:11 pm
"Really...?" He considered Aleksy's words for a long while, really let them sink in, took them to heart or whatever. "I mean, I guess we do..." Speaking frankly was something that Shiloh was pretty damn good at. Or maybe bluntly. Whatever, those were basically both the same thing, right? Right.
"You can't really mean that though." He lifted his head finally, leaning back against the seat. Aleksy was looking at him, but he was regarded the weathered ceiling of the car he was driving. "You can't—" He stopped himself suddenly, followed by a short sigh. "I mean, I guess you can be, actually." He wasn't crying, but he rubbed his eye with his sleeve anyway. "I'm not used to people saying that, I guess." Jamie had said he was proud of him a multitude of times. Others had too, but it still felt surreal.
"I just don't want to let anyone down, y'know?" He was whining, he knew he was, but he couldn't help it. "Or anyone to hurt, but I know it's stupid and naive and inevitable."
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Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 10:56 pm
"Really," said Aleksy, "And yes, I can mean that. I do." He reached over and pressed his knuckles gently into Shiloh's shoulder, pushing him slightly. "I cannot promise that you are never going to let anyone down or hurt anyone. But I do not believe you would ever do something to hurt someone."
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2017 1:16 pm
Shiloh sniffed, his expression pathetic for a second, the standard defeatist. After a moment he looked over, and then the 'punch' had him swaying slightly side to side like a bobblehead. "I mean, I wouldn't try to on purpose."
His attention drifted back down to the shift, the steering wheel, the muted radio.
"I was really worried," He said after a minute, "That I wouldn't have this job in this world either. You said we were close here. I kinda liked to think we were close on the other side too." There wasn't any mistaking the melancholy in his voice, but he was at least trying to sit up straighter. "Thanks, Aleksy."
There was the smile. Crisis averted.
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Posted: Wed May 10, 2017 6:27 pm
"Of course," said Aleksy. "You are a strong young man. I am proud to know you." He smiled at Shiloh. "Now shall we attempt to finish the circuit?"
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Posted: Thu May 11, 2017 2:47 pm
Hand pulling the car out of park and the other one on the steering wheel, Shiloh had answered Aleksy's question before he even spoke. "Yeah, yeah, we can finish." The car lurched carefully into motion again, and the two were off.
"Just watch, I'll be driving myself in Monday morning instead of taking the stupid goddamn bike." His hair was starting to get a little poofy. Did Shiloh always get poofy like this? The back and forth ping-pong game of 'I'm okay' and 'just kidding' was exhausted, but as long as he bounced back up, he could keep trucking through the days. One step at a time. One crisis per week. One loop around the parking lot after another. The list went on.
Even if he did crumble, he'd try his best to see everything through to the end. shibrogane fffiiinnnn??? unless u want aleksy to say MORE WORDS otherwise i want a followup conference rp >: D
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