Do you have problems or concerns that you don't feel comfortable talking to your friends about? Maybe you could use some suggestions or helpful advise? Then look no further than your friendly Counselor! All students are welcome to come in and openly speak about anything that's on their mind.
Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 5:59 pm
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Ren was awakened on the very next day of his arrival at the academy and the student orientation. Meeting Harvey and almost embarrassing himself there, the new staff member would soon slink back to his quarters and prepare himself for the first day. Not precisely the first day of class but he wanted to open his doors as soon as possible when it came for students to come to him. He had everything packed away in his little messenger back and spent the morning with a quick breakfast in bed, brushing his teeth, his hair, getting dressed. He stepped out of his quarters at 9 a.m. on the dot and hurried towards his new office.
"First day. Can't be late on your very first day, Ren."
He opened the doors with his key and looked inside. It was a quaint little office he had. A barren desk, soon to be riddled with paperwork and other things sat near the wall along with a few shelves and filing cabinets. A PC was on top, ready to be booted up. Next to the desk was a nice couch, presumably for visitors and other people. Ren frowned and made a mental note to get another chair and maybe something a little less intimidating when it came to talking to students. He took his key from the door and set his bag down on the chair. The following time was spent putting everything away in its place. Files and contacts went into the cabinets, books and reports on the shelves, his PC was started and he logged in under his credentials. All the while, she muttered a faint song under his breath.
Marcus's hand hovered over the doorknob. He licked his lips, a nervous habit he had picked up from one of his many relatives and took a breath. This was stupid, Ray didn't want to talk to him. Even if Marcus figured out if he or Koru had been the ones to screw up it wouldn't help any.
The librarian had sent him here after he had asked if there were books on handling grief. He wasn't sure how talking now would help. He had made that querie when Ray still talked to him..
The boy rocked on the balls if his feet still unsure. However fate made that choice for him when he fell on the door and grabbed the door knob for balance
“Sorry I'm...sorry” he said now that he was in full view of the man inside. “Hi.” He said straightening up. /color]
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A ruckus behind him had Ren turn around to face the student that had almost fallen behind him. He was young, but not as small or naive looking as the year one students. His auburn eyes let through a faint sense of fear and hesitation. He looked pretty pained. After gathering his bearings, he spoke to him.
"Sorry I'm...sorry...hi."
Ren would smile and raise his arms to the boy, his calm voice born through his rather full lips.
"I didn't see you there. It's okay, you haven't done anything wrong."
The school counselor set what was in his hands on top of the desk and then clapped both hands together and motioned to the couch by his desk. "Please! Sit down. Or stand, whatever is more comfortable for you. Would you like a drink? I usually pack extra water for the days like these." Regardless of the boy's actions or response, the pulled his chair out from behind the desk and then offered his hand for a shake to Marcus. "I'm Ren, the school counselor as you might have heard from the official welcoming ceremony. It's a pleasure to meet you. What brings you here today?" ((OOC: ))
To say Marcus was out of his element would be an understatement. In his twelve years of life the boy had never really been inside of a counselor's office. He knew his old school had wanted him to see one but Marcus had been pretty good at dodging it. He supposed that had to do with his parent's beliefs that matters should be solved at home. Marcus himself couldn't say he liked asking for help from anyone-in all his growing up fending for himself while his parents worked, he had never really found himself needing to. First time for everything right? "Yeah I...I guess I'll sit" he said sitting down on one of the chairs offered to him. The man looked young...around his brother's age. Marcus for some reason had been expecting an old man with glasses and a clipboard. "Um..I'm okay thank you" Marcus said fidgeting with a lose threat on the leather chair. He took a moment to make sure he was calm, that he was approaching the task in front of him in a detached analytical matter. He..kinda got there. "I'm here because I need help for a friend of mine. He's dealin with something and..he's sorta having a rough time" he said looking up and stilling the fidgeting. "He-wait before I tell you, you can't tell anyone right? You have like...that thing doctors have confidency? No confidentiality, yeah?"
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Ren watched as his invitation to sit down was met and the child plopped down on the couch looking incredibly nervous. Like a cornered pokemon at the hands of its prey. "I know it may not seem or feel like it, but I'm here to help. I won't judge you or anybody else who comes to me for help. So feel free to take some time to comfort yourself if you need to. We can start when you're ready." Once seated himself, Ren would wait patiently while Marcus got comfortable and would begin to speak. After some fidgeting with the chair for a little bit he began by saying that it was help for a friend. Whether he knew it was false or not, Ren would have to see where it would go from here.
"...before I tell you, you can't tell anyone right? You have like...that thing doctors have confidency? No confidentiality, yeah?"
"Of course." Ren gave a nod. "Your case is ours and ours alone. I cannot inform anybody else about it or even talk with it about them in passing conversation. Only if it's a true emergency, like somebody's life depends on it but the chances of that happening are quite slim. Regardless, this shall remain between us." He said, placing his hands in his laps and leaning back in his chair. "You can trust me, Marcus. I promise." ((OOC: ))
To say Marcus was out of his element would be a gross over-statement. In all of the twelve years he had been alive, the Sinnoh-native boy had never been to a counselor's office. He knew his school had wanted to at one point but..well Marcus' dad was a firm believer of solving things at home. He couldn't help but grin a bit grimly when Ren said the chances of someone's life being in danger were slim. Well didn't I just draw the lucky kricketot on that one. Stopping the fidgeting the boy took a moment, his hands stilling and his face returning to it's usual calm stare. "Well see my friend...he lost his twin sister" he said getting right to the thick of things. "And I mean..when I met him he was kinda quiet about it. He talked a lot about photography and wanting to travel and we..we might have..broken into the campsite to fish..might have" It felt weird admitting breaking the rules to an adult but hey if this counselor person couldn't really tell anyone where was the harm. "The thing is...he was, he stopped eating for a while? I figured I shouldn't like yell at him yknow cause that would make him not wanna see me. So I'd hang around near meal times and kinda trick him into eating stuff. Least that way..I figured I'd be in the know in case he passes out again-oh yeah he passed out when we met said he hadn't eaten for three days" he hadn't realized how much he had been keeping to himself or how stressful and kinda scary making sure someone ate and stayed alive could be but as he recounted Marcus' addam's apple bobbed betraying his feelings just as the tell of him licking his lips-something he did when he was nervous or upset or scared. Despite this however his voice was steady, his eyes were clear and facing forward. Were it not for the tells, you wouldn't really be able to tell he was feeling any sort of way. "And I mean it worked for a while? This girl got involved...two of them actually and they kept...wanting to make him talk or something.They said they were worried but if they were they wouldn't be pushing like that. They weren't thinking about what he wanted just what they did" He was still angry with them...Koru and Kirsi. Marcus didn't get angry easily, truth be told he couldn't think of time he was angry since....when was grade 2 again? But they had really messed things up as far as he was concerned. "I kept trying to hide him and then....he ended up saying something about wanting to die..to join his twin..about how he was a monster.." He went back to fidgeting with the loose threat on the chair. Marcus fiddled with stuff a lot, threats on his clothes, his pokemon's fur, Harvey had made some comment about getting him a fidget toy. Like usual he wasn't sure if his brother had meant it or said it in spite. "I guess I just..wanna know if I could have done something differently" he said getting to what he needed to know "like i let him do anything he was comfortable, I didn't push him, I thought I did right but...but he hasn't talked to me since winter break so I...I think I failed."
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Marcus began as Ren attentively listened to his explanation about what it was that he had come here. The very anxious and hesitant nature never faltered one bit as he spoke about a friend who had suffered a loss in the family recently. He fetched his notepad over by the chair and began to jot down a couple of notes to look back on later. Marcus' friend and him looked very close. He put his mind away for that admission of breaking a school rule for now. That would be pretty troublesome to talk to him about in a state like this. His description of his friend's decline was beginning to grow a bit worrying. Normally a loss of appetite would come soon after the initial stepping stones but this was the first. Ren's expression turned a little more concerned, his brows furrowed while his pencil continued to write down notes and such. When Marcus needed some time to himself to continue, it was offered but he just continued to face Ren and speak so calmly as if this was just another day. The child went on more about the two girls who pushed him and then about how his friend admitted to wanting to die. His pencil continued still, now beginning to grow worried ove the child who had suffered like this. Marcus soon interrupted that train of thought with his next admission.
I thought I did right but...but he hasn't talked to me since winter break so I...I think I failed."
"Marcus." Ren began, setting the notepad away as he leaned forward. "I want you to understand that this isn't your fault. None of it. Sometimes when tragedies like this happen, those affected act weirdly. Your friend...you can tell he misses his sister dearly. You will have only failed your friend if you think that he can't be saved from doing something...bad." The thought of such caused Ren to wince preemptively. "Could you have done something differently, yes but everyone could have. If you've done all you could, then nobody will ask different of you. I would ask for you to seek out your friend. Try and bring him here so that we can talk. At the very least, let him know you care and that he's making a huge mistake if he's thinking about such a thing."
After his words, Ren then focused a bit more on Marcus himself. "As for you, Marcus. I want you to go somewhere today or tomorrow and I want you to cry." He paused for a moment, though still smiling. "I know it sounds strange but I just want you to sit and just think about this for a while. If you can't cry, then at least just ponder it. It's not your fault that your friend has gone through this or thinks this way. I can't stress that enough."
Marcus vaguely registered that the counselor's pencil had stopped working. He eyed the notepad somewhat suspiciously, wondering what exactly was being written down. Usually Marcus might have noticed the writing sooner but he had been so in his feelings ( which was the only way he would reveal them really) that he just...hadn't. He was taken out of his thoughts however when Ren said his name. Marcus startled, somehow looking surprised that Ren was even there, despite the fact that he had been talking to him. He took in what Ren said with some grudging relief, it was nice to hear that this wasn't his fault ( he supposed he sorta knew that..he hadn't been the one to kill Rina after all, and Kirsi and Koru had both acted on their own accord.) However it was soon replaced with stark fear when Ren mentioned the only way Marcus would fail was if he thought he couldn't keep Ray from doing something...bad. "He hasn't talked to me since break You think that-s why-is that why he-" he couldn't quite bring himself to finish the sentence. Was that why he hadn't heard from Ray? And if it was was that his fault? He nodded a bit absently when Ren said he could have done something differently same as everyone. Marcus supposed he was thinking too much of himself if he thought he could fix Everything or was somehow not like everyone else involved but..but wasn't he the one to usually handle things? Some of those feelings were assuaged when Ren mentioned if he had done all he could no one could ask him differently. He had done all he could hadn't he? Taken time to spend with Ray and watched him and even get in trouble with the girls for him? But had he really? How did you even know when you did everything you could? Where was that measuring stick? 'I did everything i could' Marcus' dad would say when his mother refused to let them spend christmas together 'I did everything I could' was something his uncle had said when he talked about a Ranger mission gone wrong. Marcus believed them too but 'I did everything i could' on his own lips sounded as hollow and fake as when his parents promised no more fighting after 6 pm. Still he nodded, showing Ren that he was listening and was at least trying to believe him. When he mentioned he should tell his friend ( they were friends right?) how much he cared about him and that he'd be making a mistake Marcus offered more information "I tried..back when..yknow he had this whole breakdown-because Kirsi and Koru wouldn't leave him alone-I told him his sister wouldn't want him to die and that he was here at the academy for a reason..and I think it helped but then..." But then Kirsi had come and undone that hadn't she. "I think someone else who knew his sister found out and got mad at him...told him he was a monster for not talking to anyone or something like that. All I know is he came to the daycare and accused us all of laughing at him, of pretending to be his friend. It's all her fault" Marcus wasn't usually one to assign blame but in this case he couldn't help but feel like he had been balancing a house of cards all by himself and it had been scary but he had been doing okay and then Kirsi had come and knocked it all down, months of progress of feeling like there was solid ground in a frightening situation all gone and undone in one conversation. "I sent him a notebook with my brother" he said rubbing at his eye, before remembering with a sting what harvey always added "half-brother..he..he knows my friend's Aunt so he was vistiin anyways..I thought...maybe writin stuff down would help him but I haven't heard from him yet so I dunno if it helped" He hadn't wanted to push Ray into talking-after all he had learned from long drawn out fights between his parents that when someone was upset you pushing yourself on them only made them more upset. You needed to leave it up to them when they talked again...so that they could help like it was their choice-because it should be. It was hard, he missed Ray a lot more than he let on. "I guess..I should message him? I just...respecting boundaries is important" That was something his aunt Monica had said to his mom when Marcus was too tiny to remember what age he was. His mom had been crying his dad had stormed off and they had flown to Pewter that weekend not for the first time in his life. It had sounded important and so Marcus had always remembered. His aunt had looked proud when he recited it back to her. Marcus hadn't quite understood why back then but now he did...and even if Ren had a point he felt like pushing Ray would violate the boundaries rule. He couldn't help but make a face when Ren brought up what he should do...Marcus hadn't come here for help for himself ( Ray needed it so much more, he was fine just fine really. He was.) and even as he appreciated getting it, the help he was getting went against everything in his programming. "Crying's for babies" he said sounding his age for once ( if his mother was here she might mention how much like his toddler sister he sounded, if his father was here he might draw a comparison to a certain breeding teacher who would oft say the same) 'that won't help, there's enough people crying if I join in there too-I just need to fix this" he said sure that Ren was somehow misunderstanding what he needed.
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Ren was listening to Marcus the entire time he was talking, picking up small ticks here and there while his pencil would begin moving again. He had a hunch...but it would require permission to dive into Marcus's file and see if his little theory held any water. If Marcus were to glance at the notepad, it would contain some notes about him. What he had said, what he was doing or sounded like, little question marks about things Ren didn't know about and just a general overview of his words. Ren would look sympathetic towards the child. That look on his was made it look like he was so confused and worried. Somebody who was bottling up things and it was beginning to overflow. He spoke a bit more on how they hadn't talked since the break.
"He hasn't talked to me since break You think that-s why-is that why he-"
"It's possible, I won't lie." Ren said, giving a gentle sigh. "But he's still grieving over his sister. When people hurt, we like to withdraw. What you told me about the other two friends, they kept pushing him because they were worried. He yelled at everyone because nobody was giving him space and he needed time to breathe." Without meeting the friend, this was just an estimate. There were thousands of deviations that could have done this but this was just one rough guideline set by Marcus's little confession.
"I tried..back when..yknow he had this whole breakdown-because Kirsi and Koru wouldn't leave him alone-I told him his sister wouldn't want him to die and that he was here at the academy for a reason..and I think it helped but then...I think someone else who knew his sister found out and got mad at him...told him he was a monster for not talking to anyone or something like that. All I know is he came to the daycare and accused us all of laughing at him, of pretending to be his friend. It's all her fault."
A sickening amount of hatred and anger laced the words that he said. Still, Ren was proud of him coming to speak like this. "You're doing wonderful, Marcus. I know it can be hard at times, but just try and continue. Tell me who is "her"? Is it Kirsi? Koru? Maybe another student?" He would look down at his notepad and set it on the desk before getting up and then sitting next to Marcus. "If you need to take a break or somebody, I'm here." He offered Marcus his hand if he needed it as he went on about trying to help. It was almost so pure that he cared enough for a friend this way. At him rubbing his eyes, Ren reached over and offered a box of tissues.
"I guess..I should message him? I just...respecting boundaries is important"
He had a point but it was a sensitive subject. "And it is. The hard part is that sometimes, you have to take a step out of line if you care about your friend. But let's make it more simple. Start by saying hello, maybe try to chat about things that you two enjoyed. If things go well, then maybe ask if he wants to hang out again. The key is to start slow. You have to show him that you're interested in him as a person." Ren would arch an eyebrow at Marcus refusing the advice of not crying, saying it was for babies. If he had a pokebuck for every time a child had said that, he would be able to retire in a month. Instead, he got close to Marcus, bringing his feet onto the couch and sitting cross legged with enough room for the child.
"I appreciate how you feel the need to do this as fast as possible." Ren began, his soft voice now taking on a very slight motherly tone to it. "But you can't rush things like these. I asked you to cry not because it might not help. You're going through a lot, Marcus. But the academy wasn't built in a day. Things like this take time. So promise me you won't try and rush this. If you care about your friend, please let him go at a rate he's comfortable with."
Leaning back, he pushed some hair out of the way. "Technically, I should probably inform the school of your little break in since it is still a school rule, but..." he winked. "If you help me with something, I promise I won't tell. Tell me, have you heard of a girl named Ashley? Red hair, quiet, carries a doll around?"
Marcus wasn’t sure what to do with the answer Ren had given him as to whether or not Ray might have done something drastic. He supposed he should appreciate that he wasn’t sugarcoating things or telling him not to worry. It was familiar since the Bennetts, diverse and distanced as they all were tended to have an honest streak in them and a belief that coddling their children could only go so far before they were prepared for the world in all it’s messiness. People often thought this was bad parenting but honestly Marcus usually liked knowing what was coming his way, whether it was “i’m staying at my mother’s for the weekend, your dad knows what he did” or “it might be better if you spend new year’s with your dad and hannukah with me this year” or even “no I don’t think i can call out of work..it’s just not in the cards with the bills fo the months.” Usually that is...when he wasnt being told his friend might well be mimicking a doorknob. He swallowed once then pushed the thought to the back of his mind. Something else he had learned from his house life was if you couldn’t help something at the moment, it did little good to dwell on it. Focus on solutions, that was what Marcus liked to do. Which was why he startled when Ren came to sit with him and told him he was doing well. Unacostumed to the level of praise he was getting over something Marcus wasn’t sure was an accomplishment, he stilled for a bit, his eyes widened in surprise and looked at Ren betraying for once just how much of a kid he was. In a moment however he was listening again, analytical expression back on his face, although it darkened again when Ren brought up ‘her’ “Ye-yeah” he said taking the tissue, dabbing at his eye once before fidgeting with the piece of tissue. It of course led to the tissue being shreeded in his hands but Marcus seldom seemed to notice. “Kirsi grew up with my friend so she was...she didn’t know about his sister..and she was friends with her too so she was mad and-but she was mad at me too for not letting her talk to R-to my friend” it was getting hard not to name Ray, especially when he was naming other students but Marcus couldn’t help but feel like he had to. After all when more people had gotten involved that was when everything had spun out of control. He hated when things spun out of control. “So...when he got mad at all of us..I think she told him it was his fault? I dunno I..wasn’t there..i should have been” He should have kept a better eye on Ray..should have never let Kirsi get ahold of him. “Koru’s Kirsi’s best friend so when I-” here he stopped considering if he wanted to reveal the next bit of information, it didn’t exactly make him look his best after all “she got mad at me cause she thought I was like….keeping my friend and her apart or something? And then she got mad at me cause i told Kirsi she was a lousy friend for yellin at my friend and then my brother got involved and I really heard my rights read at me” Harvey yelling at him about what the eldest Bennett called misbehaviour was really what he held Kirsi the most accountable for. It had stung, being on the receiving end of that. Especially when he had been trying ( and failing) to get his brother to like him. He nodded when Ren said he had to give Ray time. It was hard but Marcus could do that. “Yeah I’ll just...maybe I’ll just ask him if he got my present” The truth was Marcus wanted to find Ray and confront him and apologize and Know they were friends but he knew better than to act on that. He was taken aback when Ren said he had been trough a lot...he honestly hadn’t thought about that. “I dunno….I’m not the one who lost someone” he said fidgeting again. Ray and Elijah and even Kirsi...they were the ones with the real problems. Marcus was just...struggling to help. Compared to them he had no problems at all right? He looked up when Ren mentioned not getting him in trouble. Marcus found himself giving a small smile, the kind that said he knew he’d away with telling him the truth. After all… “Cause of confidentiality right?” But then Ren mentioned another girl and his thoughts were taken back to the sorting ceremony. “Ashley…” he said thinking back, the name sounded familiar “yeah..yeah she was sorted into Salamance right?” he said remembering the girl cackling after receiving her tie from Koru. He couldn’t recall much about her past that but hey it was something “she seems nice enough...what’s she need help with?” he asked smiling a bit. Now that they weren’t talking about his feelings but about helping someone else, Marcus’ demeanor became much more open.
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Ren was growing increasingly proud over how well Marcus was doing in here. It was obviously not his umph-teenth time in a place like this and here the little guy was giving it is all. A smiled would still linger on Ren's lips as he just listened. No notes or playing with his hair, just focusing on Marcus.
"Kirsi grew up with my friend so she was...she didn’t know about his sister..and she was friends with her too so she was mad and-but she was mad at me too for not letting her talk to R-to my friend. So...when he got mad at all of us..I think she told him it was his fault? I dunno I..wasn’t there..i should have been."
An unfortunate turn of events. Sadly, it was expected when people were upset at one another. They get caught up in the moment, say things they never meant to be said in a sort of way. "You shouldn't dwell about what you should have done back then." Ren said in a sort of frank way. "Again, it's important to focus on what you can do now." It was mainly to prevent Marcus from focusing on what he could have done had he been there and instead, have him slowly talk about the current goingons. More listening followed.
"Koru’s Kirsi’s best friend so when I-she got mad at me cause she thought I was like….keeping my friend and her apart or something? And then she got mad at me cause i told Kirsi she was a lousy friend for yellin at my friend and then my brother got involved and I really heard my rights read at me"
Ren winced. This was going to be quite the break up to defuse and look at what went wrong. "Well, that's a start." He joked thought tried to keep things positive, offering Marcus another tissue if he needed it. "I know it might hurt, but can you tell me if you felt mad at her for getting you yelled at by your brother?"
Marcus also seemed pretty taken aback from being told he had been through a lot and just brushed it aside. The older boy leaned back. "No, but you're worried about your friend who lost his sibling. You're also upset at two other once friends of yours for what they said to you and your friend. Then your brother yelled at you for yelling at the girls. To top things off, you came to me and told me all of that, on not even the first day of class." he said. "You don't need to lose a family member or a friend to be told that, Marcus. I'm saying that a lot has happened to you. I'm still so proud of you for coming in here. It takes a lot of courage to come forward and just talk. Talk about how you feel, why you feel that way." Ren smiled again. "If you want, you can come to me whenever you have a problem or want to talk. I'd also like to see you every so often and just talk about your life. How classes are going, your friends, family."
On the topic of Ashley, he seemed a bit more eased going into the topic. "Correct. Ashley...is a special case." He got up and closed the door, locking it behind him and then moving to his desk. "What you're about to hear stays between us, okay? I don't want the other kids learning about her issues." Ren dug through the file cabinet for a bit and took out a manila folder, rejoining Marcus on the couch. He set parallel to him, confidential files and things, then grabbed a handful of papers and set them on the ground, soon sitting up.
A sigh to begin. "Ashley is a special case." he repeated, shuffling papers around for a bit. "I did some work before I was hired officially, just some background research on special request. She was raised in an abandoned manor in Lavender Town, of all places." Ren handed Marcus a copy of the photograph of the manor in question. It looked in ruins, though some small spectral gazes from the windows of the large manor lingered, even in this photo. "Police say that she must have been dropped off there as a baby. Somehow, the pokemon of the manor took her in, specifically ghost types." More things were given to Marcus, copies of her drawings. They were crude but they all had a very similar message: a love for the pokemon that took her in. Drawings of herself crying and a group of Ghastlies bringing her presents, a Gengar that was hugging her, a ground of Kanto ghost types from around the manner, and others of various ones.
"She needs help with connecting with people." Ren explained. "Put yourself in her shoes. Pokemon raise you, you never see anyone like you. Then all of a sudden, you're taken away by people who look like you and you get sent to a totally new place with no chance to see the people or pokemon that you loved. We've had a few sessions together. Ashley. She...tries but I think she just really needs somebody to give her a chance. That's where I need your help." The counselor said, offering up a hopeful smile.
"I'm not asking for you to become best friends with her. I just want you to try and become friends. Talk to her, maybe help her in class or have lunch. Maybe she'll like you more than she does with me. Something about you tells me you two might find something in common."