Dimmest Glows (Turny, Tordy, dragon’s)

[Thaliawen]

To’da had never gone so long without seeing his brother. It had been a solid two sevendays since the hatching, but he still remembered his brother’s words. Never was a really long time. Had Turny meant it? Maybe he’d just been angry and the time To’da has given him had been enough.

Hoping this was the case, To’da had made his way to the healers to see his brother. He’d brought a plate of bubblypies as a peace offering. He’d only eaten one on the way. Was sugar bad for infections? He knew Turanves had been sick after his wounds... Were bubblypies really the best idea?

“Oh well. Too late to go back,” To’da muttered. “Do you think he’ll take them?”

I’m sure your brother’s forgiven you for whatever you did. Sativuth offered. It has been a long time.

“I hope you’re right.” He headed for Turan. “Turny? I brought pies!”  

[magnadearel]

Thaliawen

It had been a rough and miserable two sevendays for the young man. His fever had finally broken and he'd gotten healer approval to finally be transported back to Fort Weyr with his dragon. He was still restricted to the infirmary as his wounds healed and his dragon was constantly at his side.

He had struggled with himself to initially accept her, and she'd been in his fevered dreams. She had wanted him. His green Azelth would help him rise if that's what he wanted.

His bite wounds had been bothering him and very itchy as they started heal and he hadn't slept very well the night before. T'ves, has he'd finally picked after much coaxing from Azelth, lay with his eyes closed as he listened to the healers moving around him.

A familiar voice brought a painful wince to his face. He didn't want to see that person. Despite that he already knew who was coming, another voice chimed in. Your brother is coming. He has managed to acquire bubblypies from the kitchen for you somehow. The green's implications were clear enough. Bronzeriders could have good perks. It wouldn't hurt to have one on their side.

"Go away." Some other bronze rider then. T'ves couldn't bear to face his brother.

 

[Thaliawen]

He should have expected his brother’s reaction. But To’da was stunned. “Go away?” He echoed, shaking himself. He was in disbelief. “Shards, Turny, it’s been two sevendays! I’ve been worried about you all this time. Can’t we eat bubblypies and talk?”

Don’t let him know how upset this makes you, Sativuth advised. You are strong, mine. I know you are sad...

But Sativuth’s words were ignored. “Did you mean what you said at the hatchling? You don’t want to see me?”  

[magnadearel]

Thaliawen

It didn't matter how long it had been two sevendays or two turns. It wouldn't make any difference that his brother had impressed the dragon he had wanted his whole life. It felt like a betrayal of the worst kind. Azelth gave a soft trill and rested her head on her rider's chest.

T'ves didn't want to eat bubblypies or talk with his brother. It tore his heart to have them so close, but Azelth provided a slight balm. He gritted his teeth as To'da asked questions. "Yes I meant it." What did he expect? For him to get up and everything to be like it was?

He does love you. Azelth commented mildly. I don't care. It hurts too much. She knew, and she understood.

 

[Thaliawen]

He’d meant it. To’da swallowed. His hands were trembling underneath the plate of bubblypies he’d brought. One of them, one that had been safely seated at the edge of the plate, tumbled off of it. To’da made no move to try and catch it.

“But why?” He asked. “We were fine at the hatching. And then...” He hesitated. “Turny, I didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t know why you hate me.”

But he knew T’ves did. He would’ve forgiven him, whatever he’d done. They always forgave each other.  

[magnadearel]

Thaliawen

Azelth watched the bubblypie fall. She saw the look on the healer's faces that To'da had made their floor dirty. Perhaps she could help. She waddled over and licked it off the floor. It tasted much different from the meat she'd been fed so far. She ran her tongue over her lips as she debated the taste. In the end she decided she liked it. He brought you good bubbly pies. Not that it helped much.

T'ves took several slow, deep breaths as he tried to hold the tears back. How could he tell his brother that he'd impressed the dragon that should have been his? That every moment he stood there was just eating his mind and heart with jealousy? And there was no way out. He was in no condition to get up and walk away even if the healers would have allowed it. Azelth came back to his side with yellow in her eyes. I am here T'ves. You do not need him.

Fine. He would tell him and get him to leave pronto. "You impressed a bronze and I didn't." T'ves spat the words out with hate. There was no way to change that. People would look down upon him for the rest of his life simply because his dragon was a green. T'ves would have to work five times harder to achieve anything.

 

[Thaliawen]

What? He’d suspected, but he’d never expected that to come from his brother’s mouth. He stared. “But that isn’t my fault!” He protested. “You know what the candidatemaster said. Dragons choose their riders!” Was all of this really over jealousy?

“You don’t want to see me anymore because you’re jealous of me?” He asked. “I’m nothing! A weyrling. Sativuth choose me because I was the right person for him. Same as your dragon!”  

[magnadearel]

Thaliawen

T'ves finally opened his eyes and despite his bandages on arm and leg, propped himself up on the bed. "Do you enjoy tormenting me Tordare? You know just as well as I, riders are judged by the color they impress. Do you really think they'll possibly look up to me when I ride her?" He pointed violently to the green laying faithfully by his side.

"Don't be stupid and naive anymore Tordare. It doesn't suit you. Weyrlings grow up. Seeing you is like pouring salt onto my wounds. Everything I'd hoped and dreamed, gone down the drain now." What was he now? Worthless. Sativuth I must request that you call your rider back. He is upsetting mine terribly. Perhaps they can talk some other time.

 

[Thaliawen]

“Tormenting you?” To’da echoed in disbelief. It’d been T’ves’ choice to avoid him. How would he have known that visiting his brother would cause such grief? “Why shouldn’t they? Things are changing. Colors don’t matter.”

“It’s not my fault,” he protested. “I would have been happy with any dragon! A green! A bronze! A gold, a white! As long as I was a rider and could make you proud I didn’t care what I rode. You couldn’t bring yourself to be proud of me? I can’t help that I Impressed Sativuth. He needed me. But that shouldn’t mean your dreams are dead. Greens are important. They’re incredibly important...”

Yes, and yours is causing mine unhappiness. Sativuth agreed. Perhaps they can. I do not know if this rift can be healed. Mine, Sativuth’s voice was gentle, He causes you undue stress. He will not listen. Come.  

[magnadearel]

Thaliawen

He hadn't really been actively avoiding his brother. In fact he hadn't been doing much of anything while he healed. He also hadn't invited his brother to come and see him either. T'ves wondered if Tordare actually believed what he'd said. Were times changing. Sure there was breeding greens in the north, but in the south they still had golds. As evidenced by their dragons.

As soon as any worry about plague left, the golds would migrate up and it would all go back to the way it had been for centuries of Turns. He knew his brother had just wanted to be a rider, but why did it have to be a bronze? If it had been any other color, things could have been different. How could he be proud now?

Fertile greens. Soon they would be swimming in fertile greens. If they had only a handful or a dozen, then perhaps. But when every green would soon be clutching, there was nothing important about that. They were nothing more than cattle. As common as non-breeding greens had been before the plague. There was a thought there, he'd have plenty of time to mull if over after his brother left.

"Leave. Please just leave." T'ves gave an exhausted sigh. Azelth moved to press her head against his chest to get him to lay back down. "Go hang out with some other weyrlings." The feelings are too strong right now, the green agreed sadly. Maybe some day........