How to maintain a healthy level of insanity.

[Talon Tearine]

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “in”.

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to expresso.

6. In the memo field of all your cheques, write “for sexual favours”.

7. Finish all your sentences with “in accordance with the prophecy”.

8. Don’t use any punctuation marks.

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go”.

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle music all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you are not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address you by a wrestling name.

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, “I won! I won! Third time this week!!!!!”

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “run for your lives, they’re loose!”

19. Tell your children over dinner, “due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”  

[haloshatterer]

ha ha ha rofl rofl these are too good!!  

[Yasu-chan9]

rofl My GAWD. I lurv these! *copies and pastes on Word*  

[Talon Tearine]

4laugh I'm glad that you're enjoying them. Lol. rofl  

[Wolfeona The Wise]

after lunch every time you mess up smile yawn and say gosh its early
and in the morning do the same except say gosh its geeting late
i actuly do this and they old lady i work with "old being 80 somthing seroursly!" gives my a dirty look. i love it! >=)  

[Phoenixliv]

those are so funny!
I actually regularly do #s: 9,
and have done #s: 6 & 8
w00t!  

[ChibiTonsei]

xd Funny!


- place a piece of chewed gum near your ear and when it falls on the floor jump back and exclaim "My brain fell out again!!"  

[Shadow1697]

Fart and then say, "It was you"  

[Ariana Silverfire]

rofl those are good! I'll have to remember them. rofl  

[haloshatterer v2]

hang netting around your workspace and play jungle sounds all day.

put your kids clothes on backwards and send them to preschool as if nothing was wrong