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x- Spazz Muffin -x Captain
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 Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 12:40 pm
I don't think I've shared the good news with my lovely guild.
I'm in the process of writing a novel.
But the thing is, only my friends read, and I don't get enough constructive criticism.
I figure, hey!
My guild is all literacy, so why not get criticism from them?
So, if you guys have the time, do you guys mind dropping by my journal and reading a chapter or two and giving some constructive criticism?
[Table of Contents]
It might be a good idea to start from the Prologue.
xDD
Be warned: I started writing is when I was...13.
That's two years ago!
So my writing is a bit iffy at the beginning.
I say it gets better a few chapters in.
xDD
Like, 11.
xDD
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Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 2:03 pm
So far, I've read the prologue. I have to say I like it! Goes right into the action (which I love). I'm planning on reading it, so keep it up =D
It reminds me a bit of a story that I started writing years ago, but I never finished. Writing's not my thing. =P
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x- Spazz Muffin -x Captain
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Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 2:07 pm
Thanks.
:]
Well, not really action.
xDD
Currently, I'm working on the 31st chapter.
><
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Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 2:49 pm
True. I guess it's not really action compared to what you have in later chapters? ^^
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Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 11:26 pm
Better to have helped you and let you win,
I've tried writing novels before, I can never get past the first few paragraphs because I get bored. I used to love writing, though. Now I just don't have the energy/time to make myself start writing again.
I've only read the prologue but it's quite good. Some grammer/spelling mistakes as well as a few fragments that I think would sound better together, but that's okay. I was confused about her name, though. Is her full name Kiri P. Emikit? I don't really understand that part about Kiri being her nickname since it is already her first name, unless people are referred to by their full names in your story.
After she screams, I think it would be nice it you mentioned that she got knocked out or something, so that saying "she slowly woke up" would make more sense.
I also think that you could be more descriptive in "old fashion letters", because when people read that, different pictures are going to appear in their heads. You could add something like "old fashion letters, like the ones that you see on old, run-down stores".
I really like the beginning of your story, and I think that I will subscribe and continue reading. I would love to offer more constructive criticism if you think it helps you, so let me know if you do. And if you actually do, do you want me to comment on that entry?
than never to have touched your skin.
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 1:32 am
I was meant to start reading that like last week, but I totally forgot, so I will start tomorrow, or later tonight when I know I'm not going to get kicked off of the computer.
I started writing, but I got bored of it =/
I might start again.
My "novel" was based around an RP I joined on Gaia, you had to make a humongous profile to join, and mine was effing amazing {if I do say so myself} xD So I used her, and the loose story line of the RP as the basis of the story.
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 10:04 am
I hate how you write something when you're thirteen and think it's the most fricking amazing work of all, and then go back to it several years later and laugh uncontrollably at it. Found my old laptop circa-1996 last night and did just that.
I will check your story out later, Spazz. If it's so long, do you ever plan on trying to publish it, or..?
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 10:18 am
Thanks for the comments guys.
:]
Yeah, I'd like it if you'd comment on the journal.
xDD
I know Cross.
I do that all the time.
xDD
I used to write poems.
I had this one that I wrote for an apolgy for a friend I used to have.
I used to love it.
Seriously.
I read it the other day and burst out laughing.
xDD
I'm gonna go back and rewrite a lot of it.
xDD
And once I actually finish this novel, I'm gonna see if I can find publishers and see if they'll publish a 15 year-old.
xDD
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x- Spazz Muffin -x Captain
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 10:33 am
Yeah, exactly. I used to write this one Resident Evil fanfic with my alter-ego and this gothic chick named Mean. All these people commented saying it was very articulate and original...then I read it three /four years later and, no. >_<. Last time I posted on fanfiction.net, I just made a new account because I didn't want to be connected to that. >_>.
I keep thinking I'm going to start a novel, then realizing that my concept sucks or I don't actually have a concept at all. Hence this one folder on my computer with multiple twenty-page introductions.
Kudos on actually attempting to finish something. It's difficult. x_X.
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 10:36 am
I don't think publishers look at age that much to be honest, more about the content.
I swear there are like child writers here that get their stuff published, yeah okay, their IQs are 170+ {totally off the scale} but that shouldn't make any difference xD
You might just have to look harder for a publisher.
Or change your name like all the cool writers do, so they don't know how old you are ;O xD
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x- Spazz Muffin -x Captain
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Posted: Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:29 pm
I guess.
xDD
Thanks you guys.
All that constructive criticism is amazing.
:]
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:16 pm
Oooh... I like. The prologue and first chapter, anyway. xD
It's especially well written considering how old you were. Good luck!
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x- Spazz Muffin -x Captain
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:17 pm
xP
Thanks Mary.
:]
The much later chapters are better.
Hmm...
Chapter 11 was right after last summer.
Around mid-August.
Then it just gets much more recent.
xDD
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:20 pm
Hey that's insulting.
xDD
And rather discriminating.
I'm thirteen!
Lulz.
You don't think my stories are that bad, do you?
Tahaha.
Just kidding.
:33
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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:22 pm
x- Spazz Muffin -x Thanks for the comments guys.
:]
Yeah, I'd like it if you'd comment on the journal.
xDD
I know Cross.
I do that all the time.
xDD
I used to write poems.
I had this one that I wrote for an apolgy for a friend I used to have.
I used to love it.
Seriously.
I read it the other day and burst out laughing.
xDD
I'm gonna go back and rewrite a lot of it.
xDD
And once I actually finish this novel, I'm gonna see if I can find publishers and see if they'll publish a 15 year-old.
xDD
I saw a book in Barnes & Noble once, and it was written by an eleven year old!
So yeah, I don't think age is a factor, they care more about quality, and you've got a crapload in that story of yours.
xDD
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