i am lost.

[whiporwill-o]

i find myself unable to believe in anything. i have become pessimistic and skeptical. it seems that the more i learn, the harder it is for me to accept religion. i feel angry on the inside and i find no point to anything. perhaps this is just a combination of my stress and uncertainty of the outcome of my current situation, i do not know. this has been going on for a while, long before current predicament occured. the more i learn of pagan cultures in general the more i question myself and everything i ever thought i believed in. my mind is chaos, yet at the same time i don't seem to care. i remember a time when i felt at peace with myself, i felt comfort in my beliefs, but now i find myself confused, i assume that nothing is real (spiritually speaking) and oddly it bothers me. i cannot seem to find a balance and it is draining me.

has this ever happened to you? what did you do about it? can you offer any advice?

((serious answers only, please. i do not need or want a fluffy little 'spell' that will make life all cuddly bunnies and butterfly farts, thank you.))  

[Lucas Moonrose]

This has happened to me as well not to long ago, and I just asked for advice as you did. All of us felt this way at some point or another.

You belong to one of the Wisest guilds in Gaia. Ask for Advice or Information and you will Receive ^-^

It also helps to have someone there for you when things come crashing down.

 

[whiporwill-o]

Lucas Moonrose

This has happened to me as well not to long ago, and I just asked for advice as you did. All of us felt this way at some point or another.

You belong to one of the Wisest guilds in Gaia. Ask for Advice or Information and you will Receive ^-^

It also helps to have someone there for you when things come crashing down.

thank you, but i really don't need advice telling me to do something that i am already doing. when i asked 'what did you do about it' i meant 'how did you resolve your issue'.

but thank you.  

[oOGarrettOo]

It's really hard to give advice in these kinds of situations because everyone handles something like this so differently.

When I went through it it was probably just as chaotic as what you're experiencing now. All I really did was weigh the two. Reality and what is currently happening to me in the tangible, controllable sense, versus religion, god/esses, spiritual/faith-oriented things of that nature. Basically, I came to the conclusion that everything in front of me was what was happening then and there and it needed my immediate attention and there was no getting around it. I pretty much brushed the whole faith/spiritual thing right off and decided that when/if it was ever necessary for me to start worshiping someone, or start with the spiritual things again, the time would present itself and everything would kind of...fall into place.

Of course, I'm a very lazy spiritualist. But I digress.

Really, what I'm trying to say is, whatever you believe in shouldn't confuse you and tear you apart. So if it's causing that much anguish, perhaps it's time to brush it off and put it on the back burners. Be agnostic for a while, try not to dwell on it so much. I think things will make more sense when you're ready for them to. smile  

[whiporwill-o]

oOGarrettOo

It's really hard to give advice in these kinds of situations because everyone handles something like this so differently.

When I went through it it was probably just as chaotic as what you're experiencing now. All I really did was weigh the two. Reality and what is currently happening to me in the tangible, controllable sense, versus religion, god/esses, spiritual/faith-oriented things of that nature. Basically, I came to the conclusion that everything in front of me was what was happening then and there and it needed my immediate attention and there was no getting around it. I pretty much brushed the whole faith/spiritual thing right off and decided that when/if it was ever necessary for me to start worshiping someone, or start with the spiritual things again, the time would present itself and everything would kind of...fall into place.

Of course, I'm a very lazy spiritualist. But I digress.

Really, what I'm trying to say is, whatever you believe in shouldn't confuse you and tear you apart. So if it's causing that much anguish, perhaps it's time to brush it off and put it on the back burners. Be agnostic for a while, try not to dwell on it so much. I think things will make more sense when you're ready for them to. smile

it's very complicated [as i'm sure you know] i dont really want to set it on the backburner anymore, i've been neglecting my beliefs since i began questioning them several months ago. in the things i have learned, i do know what i don't believe and what i can't follow, but i don't know what i do believe. religion in my family is a daily conversation topic, but i do not believe the same things that they do and i can't even talk to them about it, which only makes things much more difficult.  

[Emerald_Angel28]

Yeah, I've had that problem before. But then my doctor gave me Paxil and I felt a lot better. He said that a lot of people go through times like that throughout their lives. It can be because of a chemical imbalance or just a lot of stress. I'm not saying you should take medication, just try and take some time off from everything and relaxing for a while. Do things you love doing until you feel like it's time to go back.  

[whiporwill-o]

Emerald_Angel28

Yeah, I've had that problem before. But then my doctor gave me Paxil and I felt a lot better. He said that a lot of people go through times like that throughout their lives. It can be because of a chemical imbalance or just a lot of stress. I'm not saying you should take medication, just try and take some time off from everything and relaxing for a while. Do things you love doing until you feel like it's time to go back.

i don't think you quite understand my position. i am not depressed, i have lost my spiritual path, the do not make pills for that.  

[Lucas Moonrose]

My Advice:
Carve your own path.
Along it's trail you may find the answers to your questions.
Believe what you want and follow your heart.
In the end it'll all fall into place for you.
You just need to give it a shove.

Forgive me if this is confusing.. x.x It's what came out of my head after reading the thread once again ^-^;;

 

[whiporwill-o]

Lucas Moonrose

My Advice:
Carve your own path.
Along it's trail you may find the answers to your questions.
Believe what you want and follow your heart.
In the end it'll all fall into place for you.
You just need to give it a shove.

Forgive me if this is confusing.. x.x It's what came out of my head after reading the thread once again ^-^;;

i had my own path, i was eclectic. i need more than that, something that i can take comfort in believing without having m beliefs contradict everything that i have learned.  

[Sanguina Cruenta]

Sometimes we have to throw everything up in the air in order to move forward and grow spiritually. That sounds like what's happening here by what you've said. It's not pleasant, and you start feeling uncomfortable studying spirituality and so on.

On the one hand there's not a great deal you can do to hasten your way through this period, but on the other, just doing nothing isn't going to help matters. I recommend setting your studies aside for now. Work on yourself first and then pick your studies back up when you feel like you've established a bit of stability. Start a journal - if you don't have a pen-and-paper one you can use an online one and just set it to "private". Go through what you know you don't believe first, since you've said you're on firmer ground there, and then start on subjects that used to interest you but that you're now unsure about.

Every time you come across a subject on which you feel really confused, you could make a post or thread about it here. Differing views might help you gain your feet a bit more.  

[whiporwill-o]

Sanguina Cruenta

Sometimes we have to throw everything up in the air in order to move forward and grow spiritually. That sounds like what's happening here by what you've said. It's not pleasant, and you start feeling uncomfortable studying spirituality and so on.

On the one hand there's not a great deal you can do to hasten your way through this period, but on the other, just doing nothing isn't going to help matters. I recommend setting your studies aside for now. Work on yourself first and then pick your studies back up when you feel like you've established a bit of stability. Start a journal - if you don't have a pen-and-paper one you can use an online one and just set it to "private". Go through what you know you don't believe first, since you've said you're on firmer ground there, and then start on subjects that used to interest you but that you're now unsure about.

Every time you come across a subject on which you feel really confused, you could make a post or thread about it here. Differing views might help you gain your feet a bit more.

thank you, those are all very good ideas. i am glad that there are places to ask questions like these.  

[Orchidsandfractals]

I dealt with a similar confliction in the opposite direction after Hera recently revealed her true nature to me in a dream. The way I view the fact the Theoi don't have the exactly perfect morals of my ideal human is that they are gods. Also, gods are not physical beings like you or me. They're on a different plane all together. Pray and see if your Gods reappear. It's worked for me... It's not just about rituals, it's about having the gods reveal themselves, in my experiance. I'd also suggest guided meditation with a close friend if you can, that helped me realize who my Goddess is. The Gods have their own minds, and what may be best in the long run is likely not apparent at first, or ever in our lifetimes. That's why tragic things happen. The Gods will it, and it's best for us. It's one thing to ask them to not happen, and it's another to become upset when something happens that you're not overjoyed about after prayer for said thing to not happen, and thus not believe in the power of the Gods. Athene is wiser than any human could ever be in my stance on that matter.

Also, if you're electic, there's no reason why you should have to do a ritual that makes you feel awkward. Heck, I don't eat meat or sacrfice it to the Theoi, and likely never will, because it goes against my moral beliefs. Esp with electicism, there is no reason that the Gods didn't encourage evolution and that they let who they felt were fittest survive. Or, you can take the stance that the Gods don't directly interfer in our mortal lives.

Talk to a friend if you have one close to you who is accepting.  

[Esselean]

Going through this patch of uncertainty may actually be the best thing for you even if it is confusing and stressful.
Questioning is in human nature It's how we learn and grow.
Maybe your beliefs aren't right for you at this stage of life and you need to move on to something new and different. Maybe you will develop new and better ideas or end up seeing things more clearly.  

[Sanguina Cruenta]

whiporwill-o

thank you, those are all very good ideas. i am glad that there are places to ask questions like these.

You're very welcome. I hope this period passes quickly and with as little pain as possible.