Bishie's Battle of Awesome

[Bishielurfer]

Teh Lurfer stood, calm but ready, looking out over the army of Grunnies. "Alright," she began in her best "inspiring speech" voice. "There's a lot of them, and, well...not a lot of us. But we can do this! We're strong, powerful, determined! If we can withstand drunken come-ons from frat boys and weeks of all-nighters, we can withstand anything! Right, ladies?!"

"What are you talking about?" CharChar, her right hand girl, asked. "You seem to be confused. We--" she gestured to the group of girls standing behind her, "--aren't doing anything. You're the one who wanted to play this dumb game. We're going to go to the movies."

"Wait, what?!" Teh Lurfer panicked, pouting instinctively and clasping her hands together. "You can't leave me! I'll DIE without you guys!"

CharChar rolled her eyes, backing away. "That's a risk I'm willing to take. You're more than welcome to come with us."

"I can't! Can't you see?!" She swept her arm out in a grand gesture to the Grunny Army. "Only we can stop this! Only we..." She paused for dramatic effect, tears coming to her eyes. "...Can save Modmas."

CharChar and the rest of the group stared at her for a moment before muttering, "You've been drinking too much Mtn. Dew."

"That's probably true. But come on, you guys! Help me out!"

The group seemed to consider it for a few moments before CharChar replied, "Nope. We're leaving." And with that, the group turned around and left.

Teh Lurfer watched them go with a heavy heart. "Abandoned..." She whispered. "Captain Malcolm Reynolds would be ashamed." She turned to face the Grunny Army. "But I won't back down. You!" She pointed dramatically at the sea of green. "Are going down!"  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 14
Rolled damage: 17

Attack successful!

Remaining enemy HP: 23

Remaining daily attacks: 1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teh Lurfer prepared herself as The first Grunny attacked, charging at her with all the green malice of The Grinch with 'Roid Rage.

It was then that it occured to her she was armed only with a plate of cookies and her Christmas cheer. "....I probably should have gotten a weapon out of my inventory. That was dumb."

The Grunny had covered the ground between them and now leapt into the air, ready to gnaw off her face flesh.

"Noooo!" She cried. "Not my face flesh! I need that for face things!"

Sure she was going to lose her face flesh and be out before she even began, Teh Lurfer closed her eyes and curled into the fetal position, as Gaians are wont to do in the face of danger and trolls. But the painful death never came. After waiting a few more moments, she peaked out from under her hat to see a sight both horrific and beautiful. Her sweet little baby polar bear had ripped the Grunny to shreds, spewing his bloody remains all over the snow.

"Aww!" Teh Lurfer cooed, wrapping her arms around her little bundle of murder. "Who's an adorable carnivore?" The polar bear let out a small yip, pleased Teh Lurfer appreciated the carnage. Teh Lurfer set her pet down and stood, striking a triumphant pose. "And we live to battle aga---eww...there's Grunny blood on my skirt!"  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 1
Rolled damage: 18

Attack unsuccessful!

Remaining enemy HP: 23
Remaining daily attacks: 1
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
While Teh Lurfer was reveling in her victory, a second Grunny had bounded over to her, its tiny little fangs bared. It hunched down into the snow, let out a soft growl, and flew through the air.

Teh Lurfer snapped to attention a split second before the beast made contact and she ducked, the Grunny managing to snag her hat and nothing else.

"Wah, my hat!" She shrieked, her hands groping the open air above her head. "You ugly Christmas-hating furball, give it back!" She gave chase, too distracted to do any damage to anything other than herself.  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 13
Rolled damage: 7

Attack successful!

Remaining enemy HP: 16

Remaining daily attacks: 0
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sad little Grunny, now cornered against some rocks, looked up at Teh Lurfer, silently begging for mercy.

Teh Lurfer snatched her hat back, glaring as she yanked it back on her head. "Lowlife mongrel," she growled.

She stared down at it, debating the next course of action. The thing was pretty pathetic. Killing it now seemed too cruel. "Maybe I can just put you in a cage or someth--"

Before she could finish, a large bird swooped out of nowhere and took the Grunny int its huge beak, flying off with it.

"Well, then..." Teh Lurfer shgrugged and turned around, heading back to her little polar bear and the main battle.  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 5
Rolled damage: 14

Attack unsuccessful

Remaining enemy HP: 16

Remaining daily attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 20
Rolled damage: 8

Attack successful!

Remaining enemy HP: 8

Remaining daily attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 19
Rolled damage: 3

Attack successful!

Remaining enemy HP: 5

Remaining daily attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Enemy: Grunnies
AC: 10
HP: 40

Rolled AC: 10
Rolled damage: 5

Attack successful!

Remaining enemy HP: 0

Remaining daily attacks: 0
DEFEATED.  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 12
Rolled HP: 4

Attack successful!

Remaining HP: 56  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 14
Rolled HP: 18

Attack successful!

Remaining HP: 38
Remaining attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 11
Rolled HP: 8

Attack usuccessful

Remaining HP: 38
Remaining attacks: 1  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 18
Rolled HP: 6

Attack successful!

Remaining HP: 32
Remaining attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 18
Rolled HP: 6

Attack successful!

Remaining HP: 32
Remaining attacks: 0  

[Bishielurfer]

Labtechs
AC - 12
HP - 60

Rolled AC: 18
Rolled HP: 6

Attack successful!

Remaining HP: 32
Remaining attacks: 0