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Welcome to the first ever love letter writing contest, where the recipients don't matter and entry titles are irrelevant. Anyway, on with the entries!
#1.
“Dear Willow Hey there Beautiful! how you doing?
I hope things haven’t been too hard for you, and you’re keeping warm in the cold. I know you have problems with that. What have you been working on lately? I love your style and I miss your jokes.
I love alot of things about you, actually. I love your hair, and how you smell pretty good even when you’re sweating, and how you honestly care about people, and how even when you hate someone you really want them to be happy in the end- even if you really hope they suffer for a bit first. I like the way you like to get dressed up fancy, and really love it when you twit the stores that have the clothes you’d really like to wear, then go and put together something worth wearing in what the big girl clothes stores have.
Wait, let me go back to your hair. I really love your hair. It’s unstyleable but in that smooth curtain of gold way, and waking up attacked by the silken mass of it, while annoying is still a pleasant experience. I miss you. Don’t hole up in your room all by yourself, even if all your friends are reachable on the computer. Get out! Come take a walk with me on the mountain. We don’t need anyone else, just us, and maybe some music and we can dance, when noone’s watching and that way it will be perfect. Just remember that I love you okay? Because I do.
Love-Willow.”
#2.
Dear Shawty,
I am like an OG
I can get you in McDonalds... fo' Free
Don't question my love, I'm like a super intense, mega gangsta Dove, gimme that love.Care Bearin' it up! Ballin' it up on the street, they realize mah posse dangerous cuz they is beside me, I know this really ain't what you wanna see, but baby it's all good, cuz when you rollin' with me, you's in mah hood. I can protect you shawty, I got a .45 and when they be rollin' up in here they gonna realize I ain't havin' it, cuz I'm pissed. All day twenty four seven meet you at the seven eleven.
The Seven Elven isn't how I remember, but I got you this here valentines letter.
So I got a confession to make, I ain't a gangster... no .45,
I can't get you into McDonalds... I tried.
I have no posse baby don't walk away.
I am just a white boy, hail from PA.
Just want you to know one thing true,
This valentines day, I acted for you.
My roses are red, and violets are blue
Forgive me babeh, I hope you feel the same way too.
Have a gangster Valentines Day
Love, Brase
#3.
Dear ?/Ω/Dr. John Smith/However you're writing it these days,
I can hide my love for you no longer. Truth be told, I was not hiding it particularly well in the first place. You might not have noticed my obsession, but you do have several other things on your mind.
I understand that there is a place in your life that you need filled from time to time, a need for affection, companionship and sometimes even love, though I wouldn't dare to presume how you might receive my affections. We all know how that ends and I can understand if you don't care to repeat it; but I assure you I'm much more of your type; sheltered, decorative and what intelligence I have not preventing me from doing very stupid things.
For the love of god, Doctor, take me with you!
With all the love of a single heart,
Kittywitch
#4.
My dearest love,
I love how your eyes crinkle in the corners when you laugh.
I love your sense of right and wrong.
I love how just knowing you has changed my life dramatically.
I love how we have the same taste in music and movies.
I love how our personalities are polar opposites.
I love how every time you leave your house you look for me.
I love sitting in the tree your parents planted when you were born.
I love how your eyes will light up as I walk down the aisle on our wedding day.
I love how adorable our four children will be.
I love the thought of growing old with you.
I love how close I feel to you as I sift through your trash and mail.
I just love watching you from afar. No, I just love YOU!
Much love,
Your Secret Admirer
AKA The Future Mrs. You!
#5.
To the jerkface I don't like,
I don't like you. Not as I stare at your beautiful well sculpted abs through my telescope, not as I hide in your bushes, not as a climb through your bedroom window to steal your underwear.... You might think I'm stalking you even, but that's just not true, stop being so full of yourself! Gosh, this is why I hate you so much, always catching me red handed in maybe liking you a little.
So metaphorically speaking, maybe I do like you. I'm handcuffed by love's authority. Joke's on you, love! I can break these cuffs! I CAN BREAK THESE CUFFS!
HYYYYAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHGGGG!
Still trying,
I'm not in love with you.
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