[PRP] Searching For Nothing [ Izzy & Vigo ]

[Depawsit]

The visions ... they were driving her mad! Was that really what was happening?! Was she truly nearing the end of her sanity, and at such a young age too?! The lioness wanted to moan and groan her troubles away but nothing could be so simple anymore. No, she was trapped now, but in what she didn't know! She was simply trapped in this endless circle of pictures!

An ache began in the center of her head and she winced away the pain, biting her lip to divert the pain elsewhere. Though it did little satisfy the urges building within her. She wanted to claw her own eyes out! But then the next second, she didn't. The images weren't coming from her own eyes, they were coming from her mind, but then how did you fix something coming from your own mind?!

"Hnnnnnnnnnnnngggg" She groaned, her tail dragging the ground as she neared what she had once learned was the borders of a sickly pride. She had not dared into it then, but did she care now? Now that she was going insane and losing her own sense of self?

Images .... images of lions ... lions she didn't know ... what did it mean ... did it even matter?! She had no clue, she merely wanted them gone. Gone from her memory, gone from her sight.

Gone forever.

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

Vigo was sprawled on a small hill, gazing out towards the roguelands. He was pondering that it was about time for him to head out again, to seek out more females to help in his cause for the pride. It was admittedly odd to be in such a position to seek out lionesses willing to provide him with cubs. He'd gotten such strange looks from the ones he'd approached already! They must surely think him mad, or at least slightly unstable. Was he? Heavens knew! But he honestly felt more at peace and satisfied with life than he ever had as a wanderer and womanizer.

His gaze was unfocused, but not so much so that he failed to notice a stranger heading towards the pride's borders from the savanna. Startled, he sat upright, eyes narrowed as he tried to focus. Was this one of his fellow Kitwana'antarans? As the shape drew closer, he became absolutely positive that this was not a pride member. Markings like that would have been extremely memorable, and likely the talk of the pride! Best to warn her off, lest she get herself joining the pride without meaning to.

"Uh, miss?" he called, taking a few bounding steps down the hill, slowing to an unaggressive walk when he got close enough to not shout. "I don't mean to interrupt your travels, but let me show you a way to go around the pride." He glanced over his shoulder. "We do allow visitors, but generally speaking not many visit on purpose." The wind was blowing the wrong way for any of the smell that usually kept strangers away to reach them. "Do you mind if I show you?"

Depawsit

My apologies for taking as long as I did!

 

[Depawsit]

The words had hardly had time to reach her ears before she was on the alert, her ears perked to their highest. Her piercing blue eyes scanning the area for the owner of that smooth voice. It was male, just like those of the lions in her visions. Just like the ones she wanted ... gone.

Quite quickly her temperament changed, she went from beaten and downtrodden to defensive and angered. Her claws unsheathed into the dry dead dirt at her feet. Until she finally made eye contact with the male shooting gibberish at her from the hill just ahead. She didn't care about going around! She didn't care about anything! Who was he -

Finally his figure clicked into her memory and her eyes widened in shock.

It was him. The male most prevalent in her images! But how was he here? She really was crazy, not only was she seeing flashes of things, but now ... now they were becoming more real?!

Paniced and without a thing to lose in the world, the female crouched low to the ground, let out a bellowing yowl and pounced forward at the male....

Talencia

No worries! I took a bit too! Sorry about that!
Hopefully once I catch up on my tags, i'll be much quicker xD;;

 

[Talencia]

Well that wasn't at ALL the reaction Vigo had expected. He watched her go from dragging to defensive to outright aggressive. Eyes wide, he stifled a yelp as she launched herself at him. There was no way on the beautiful green earth that he was going to harm a female, though. It didn't matter what she did to him, he wasn't about to lay a paw on her. Neither did he want to leave her alone like that either, though. In such a state of mind, she might either do harm to someone in the pride, or get herself admitted into the pride against her will. Or both. So he did the only thing he could think to do.

He lowered himself a little, then opened his paws to her. He kept his claws securely sheathed and his arms wide. He made no move to stop her charge, but held himself in an almost welcoming stance. He did close his eyes and turn his head from her raking claws, but when her body met his, he wrapped her in his powerful forepaws and held on tight. They tumbled to the ground, leaving him vulnerable to any action she might take against his belly with her hind paws. All he could do was pray that she would snap out of it or give up before he became too bloodied.

Depawsit

 

[Depawsit]

In her muddled state of mind, she say nothing but confusion and anger. There was no time to see the male's reaction, much less react to it. As the two fell to the ground, she let out a low rumbling growl. Her legs locking against the ground, pinning the male securely between herself and the dirt.

Sure she was firing mad, but she wasn't out to hurt him. She did however want the answers only he could have. Afterall he was the one haunting her every thought. Had he cat a spell on her? Or something worse? She wasn't about to let him go until her reversed whatever it was that was wrong with her!

Lowering her glistening blue eyes as close to his face as possible, she could feel his worried breath against her nose. It tingled the tiny whisker on her muzzle. "You ... what is it that you've done to me? FIX IT! FIX IT NOW!" She hissed angrily, the words coming out loud enough to usher the birds from their own nests.

"This torture, it's driving me mad! You're all I see, and I can not bear it a moment longer! I want to erase you!"

Her words began to break as she uttered her final few words, and if one were to look directly at her they could see the beginning of the emotional breakdown happening before their eyes.

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

Vigo kept his paws up and claws sheathed, careful not to set his paws against her at all. He was doing his absolute best to show her no aggression, no violence. She seemed close enough to it herself, she needed no further provoking from him! Ears pinned back in dismay, he listened as she ranted. He opened his mouth to assure her that he'd be happy to help her fix whatever was wrong, but her vehemently expressed desire to erase him had him seriously worried. Now, if he had wanted to, it probably wouldn't have been terribly hard to overpower her. But his instincts screamed at him that she needed help, not rough treatment. That being said, what was he to do? He had no idea who this lioness was!

So, he opted to play it by ear and take it nice and slow. "Okay, okay, you win," he said meekly, lowering his eyes and ducking his head as much as possible in his awkward position. He endeavored to look as cowed as possible. "Your'e right, it was wrong of me. I want to help undo the damage." He slowly raised his gaze to hers, hoping his genuine entreaty would cover the half-truths he was telling. Clearly it wouldn't help to insist he was innocent. To help her, he had to lie to her a little bit. "But you have to let me up, first," he hazarded a try, "so I can help you." Heavens knew that was the truth!

Depawsit

 

[Depawsit]

He ...

He was agreeing with her?

SO HE KNEW WHAT HE HAD DONE!?

The admissions only served to drive her more mad, but at the same time she truly felt less aggressive due to his admissions. Heaving one final sigh, she gave in to her muscles and relaxed. Though she remained hanging over the male, her eye still glistening as she hung over him. Weak ... helpless ... pathetic ...

'W-.Why ... H-How ... How could you do this to me?" She whined, looking into the male's eyes and knowing he was right about having to release him. If he truly was willing to fix her. She would have to let him go at some point.

"O-Ok.... One wrong move ... and i'll be ready though ... My eyes ... they're always on you." She moaned sadly, knowing it to be completely true. Even in her sleep he was there, and she would know exactly what he was doing .. planning .. seeing. Everything about him, was her's to know.

"I am Ndiza'Nyara, and I want you out of my head ... p-PLEASE help me!" She breathed heavily, hanging her head in defeat as she stepped off the male and staggered defeatedly beside him.

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

Vigo inwardly groaned at her words. What had the gods gotten him into?! That began a niggling idea, but for now he let it simmer. He slowly got to his paws, careful not to make any sudden or aggressive moves. "I... I'm sorry," he answered her sincerely, for he truly did feel sympathy for her apparently tortured state. He wasn't entirely certain if she truly was having visions of him or whether she was simply crazy. Regardless, his heart was too soft to treat her badly for it. Maybe, just maybe, he could help her after all. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I was... forced to it," he invented, hating himself but promising himself it was for her benefit rather than her downfall. He sent a silent prayer to any god that might hear that his tactics would work.

The simmering idea came to a boil, and he seized on it. "It was a wicked god," he told her quietly, muting himself and hooding his eyes, thinking hard and quick. "He was angry with me, and said he was going to curse some poor female to see me, day and night." He chanced a look at her to see if this clicked with her experiences. "I'm... not sure how to make it stop," he admitted slowly, then added hastily, "but names have power. You have told me yours, now let me tell you mine. Perhaps that will break the curse." His ears swiveled up to look hopeful. "Perhaps if we are touching too, that will help mend the connection?" He kept adding to his tale, in hopes that convincing her would undo whatever was wrong. One could only try, after all.

He held up a paw for her to touch with hers, pad to pad. When she had, he said as if incanting a spell, "Your name is Ndiza'Nyara, and I am Vigo'tamort. Let whatever binds us together be loosed, so we may start anew." Sounded decent. He peered at her hopefully. "Now close your eyes and we'll take our paws apart, and you tell me if you still see me with your eyes shut."

Depawsit

 

[Depawsit]

Izzy's lower jaw could do nothing more than hang open as she listened to what he had to say.

An angry, evil god had done this to her?

What on earth could this soul have done to a god to incur such a wrath?! And even worse! What could she have done to deserve the same fate?! She'd never even so much as met a god in her life! This was all becoming too much for her to handle. Just knowing that the male before her could do little to nothing to prevent what was happening, it was shattering her heart to pieces.

Cocking her head to the side, she watched as the strange male before her raised his paw and explained his plan to her. She wasn't sure how such a plan would work. But he did know gods. So perhaps he knew more than she did on the subject. That wasn't to say she wasn't skeptical of him, though she truly hoped he was on to something.

Slowly, she lifted her paw from the ground and placed it against his own. His was much warmer than her's. Oddly comforting, despite the strange circumstances the two had met under. Listening intently, she finally learned his name and her ear perked a bit in excitement.

As he finished up and prompted her to close her eyes, she gave him one lat stern look before slowly closing her eyes. It took a moment before she felt comfortable enough to separate her own paw from Vigo'tamort's. As she did, she realized she saw nothing.

For the first time, in a long time! She saw nothing!

A small smile spread across her face as her eyes popped wide open.

"I DIDN'T SEE YOU! YOU WEREN'T THERE!"

She shouted happily, startling more birds from their nests.

"THANK YOU VIGO'TAMORT! THANK YOU!" She mused, going from miserable to nearly bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"YOU DON'T KNOW HOW EXCITED THIS MAKES ME!"

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

He literally held his breath as she closed her eyes and removed her paw from his. He had hoped that paw-to-paw would be distant enough that she'd agree to it. He watched and waited, putting his paw lightly back on the ground and bracing himself in case it hadn't 'worked', and she decided to tackle him again. What in the world he would do then, he couldn't think. Perhaps take her into the pride with the promise of healers to look her over and try to help? There was the guest quarters available, after all.

Caught in these thoughts, he was unprepared after all for her reaction. He jumped as she shouted right in his face. His pupils went wide again, and some of his fur stood on end, but the words registered as a positive reaction. He blinked once, then beamed a smile at her. Thank the gods it had worked! Well, at least for the moment. He firmly pushed that thought away. He owed her better than that, after lying to her as he had. He genuinely felt guilty about that, even though it had had the desired results.

"I think I have an inkling," he replied with a chuckle, ears folded just slightly against her shouting, gleeful as it was. "What... what will you do now?" he asked carefully, more ideas swimming around in his head. If he could convince her...

Depawsit

 

[Depawsit]

Izzy could do little more than giggle excitedly as Vigo's comment. She was sure he had more than an inking! She was hopping around like a jackrabbit for goodness sake, but that didn't matter one bit! She was just excited that he was no longer prowling through her thoughts. But that he was instead right before her, and in fact wasn't that bad of a male after all. In fact, now that she had known him a bit and gotten to know his personality slightly ... he seemed nice. If she could choose a word to describe him.

She paused as soon as she asked his next question though ... what would she do next? She hadn't ever thought of that. She'd only been wandering aimlessly, being tortured by his image being seered into her mind. Now that it was gone, was there anything else out there for her?

Raising a paw to her chin she tapped it gently. "Well, I suppose my next step is to find this god. I want to know why I was cursed in this way. But more importantly why you were cursed." Izzy gulped for a moment, and then continued on. "I guess i'm curious as to what our connection is, y'know?" Shrugging her shoulders a bit, she finally calmed down enough to sit down before Vigo.

"But that will be a long journey, and I think i've earned a few days respite before I begin another one of those. Wouldn't you say? Vigo'tamort?"

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

He smiled at her using his full name. He didn't often give his full name, and it seemed it agreed with her. It was a bit of a mouthful, but if that's what she preferred to call him, he wasn't going to protest. He was troubled by her desire to hunt down the imaginary god, however. He shifted uncomfortably before speaking. "Well, he was very wicked and evil. Does evil ever need a reason? I don't find those sort of mortals ever make any sense at all in their wrong-doings, and I can't imagine a god would either." He hoped and prayed she would not go hunting down every wicked god she learned of! He felt a definite spark of protectiveness for her. If he could prevent her, he would. Her life was her own in the end, however, and he would never imprison a female, no matter if it was for her own good or not.

"And yes, I completely agree," he chuckled again, his expression lightening once more at her happy question. "I was thinking of asking you to stay in the pride here with me for a time," he began hesitantly, wondering how to broach the subject. "I... have a favor to ask, in fact." If a lion could have blushed, he would have. Anxious, he pawed at his mane along his chest, looking away as he tried to order his thoughts again. This was always the worst part. Asking the unaskable of strange lionesses. He cleared his throat and peeked back at her. "I have vowed to help my pride, by... bringing home cubs. To strengthen it, because you see, we bear the... blessing, if you will, of the goddess of Pestilence." He winced a little at the name, his ears tipping back and eyes squeezing a little shut. "She takes some of us early, before old age. So we need new bloodlines, strong bloodlines, to help our numbers and the pride as a whole."

How he hated admitting he needed to impregnate lionesses, only to take their cubs back to a pride where they could sicken and die! It was never easy. But it was his penance, which most of the lionesses he asked never knew. "You could stay here while you were pregnant, be taken care of, and you'd be safe from Pestilence's touch," he added as a positive. "I would look after you myself, you would want for nothing." In fact, his tone could almost be described as desperate. How did one ask another to give up not only some of their time and safety, but also the little lives-to-be? Miserable, he gazed down at his paws, ears defeated before she even answered.

Depawsit

 

[Depawsit]

Well, he did get right to the point of things didn't he? Though she wasn't surprised, somehow it made sense in a way. Had she not just mentioned that perhaps the two of them were somehow bonded together? And yet here he was asking her a question so pointedly. It seemed like it was something put in motion by someone outside of their own power.

The two never would have met had his image never ran through her mind. Nor would she have gotten here had it not continued. Was this that thing called fate that some of the other lionesses she knew often spoke of?

Izzy gulped down a large breath of air as she allowed everything to soak in. Of course she already knew all about the pride's illness, and cared little for it. Though it was what it was, nothing could be done to save those who had it. Though she did pine for their loss. Life was life, and it was but one giant circle. If she walked away from this obvious force of fate ... would she be punished much worse by this god who had put the fate upon her? She shuddered to think of what could be worse than someone running through her mind all the time. Day and night, sleep and awake. It turned into a nightmare, even in the waking hours.

"I ... I don't know that I have a choice in the matter Vigo'tamort."

She responded flatly, her eyes still remaining cheery, though her voice did not reveal the same tone. She was too lost in thought to deliver the same emphasis.

"Tell me, does fate mean anything to you?" Because I think we're both caught in a net of fate. Cast upon us by the very god that you say you 'angered.' Ar eyou so sure you angered him? Perhaps you did something else, and mistook his response?"

Talencia

 

[Talencia]

He sat back, gazing at her thoughtfully. This was a great deal more introspective than he'd expected out of what had originally appeared to be a completely mad lioness. His respect and regard for her nudged up quite a few notches. And her question was a valid and very applicable one, his story aside. Had it been fate that led him to Kitwana'antara? Had it been fate that nudged him to make this vow? Was it fate that he meet here a lioness who needed mental healing so badly? Were they fated to follow this path, regardless of their own choices?

It was a rather haunting thought, and made him shiver. "I don't know," he answered honestly, feeling seriously creeped out. After all, gods did exist, one having cursed this very pride at one point. He dearly hoped he hadn't just now angered one of them with his lies. He shuddered again and gave her a worried look. "I can't pretend to know the minds of gods, good or evil." He took a steadying breath and thought slowly through it. "But... fated or not, all we can do is make the best out of what life has given us. I... didn't do that for a long time," he admitted in clear shame. "I was selfish and foolish. I don't know if that angers the gods or not, but I vowed to pay a penance for it." Why oh why was he telling her this?!

Once begun, though, he found he could not stop. "That is why I don't have a mate." He nearly bit his tongue, trying to stop himself, but it kept flowing. "At this point in my life, I really would like to find a lioness who would love me, but my vow prevents it. I will have to face my previous mistakes, every time I ask a lioness to bear my cubs to take back to the pride." He glanced back towards the distant, invisible den area. "Cubs I might have to watch grow sick. Cubs it will be my responsibility to care for, without their mothers to help." He heaved a deep breath and looked back at her. "Perhaps there is fate. But if we can hold up under it, and find reasons to smile and laugh, is it really so bad?" His tone was almost pleading, as if asking her to verify that his life was not in vain, nor was without light and hope.  

[Depawsit]

Izzy nodded slowly and solemnly in understanding of Vigo's comments. She could understand his own views on fate, and how one could not decide whether there was such a thing as fate. But to be on the safe side, she would believe in this fate the gods had placed upon her shoulders. She would do as Vigo requested of her, and she would do so with the pride her Mother had held when she carried her and her siblings.

"I don't think fate is ever meant to be a bad thing Vigo'tamort. Merely to continue to presence of life and harmony on our realm. If there was no fate, and things ran simply based upon our instincts all the time. I imagine our world would be a much worse place." Izzy shook her head sadly at the comment but continued on. "You say you are trying to pay a penance. But I don't think I would look at it that way. I think you are doing a strong and honorable thing for your pride, and for yourself. Even if you never take a mate, you have given your pride a long line of fresh blood. And yourself a legacy to leave behind on this earth. Even if they all do not survive, which is a tragic end to a tragic story, there will be those who do, and you will not be forgotten by them.

Penance aside. I think you are quite honorable."

Nodding her head, Izzy finally stepped closer to the male and smiled as she felt comfortable enough to nuzzle him gently on the cheek. "I would like to be as honorable as you Vigo'tamort. I would be pleased to carry your children, and give them to your pride as a small thank you for the gift you have bestowed upon me today."

Talencia