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Godi Dzilavava was alone in the forest. She, like her mom, likes wandering out alone. Life in the herd was wonderful, everyone accepted her and her family. Even if they were strange looking. Horrifying according to some.
Godi wandered with her herd most of the time, only wandering off if they stopped somewhere for a few nights and she wanted to be alone. After all, the herd was safe.
Being around others without her herd to protect her terrified Godi more than she ever wanted to admit. Growing up, her mother, twin brothers, and sister all had chest mouths. And the herd not only accepted them, but loved having them around. After all, they were acknowledged as amazing singers. Being able to harmonize with yourself absolutely had it's advantages. And when they sang together as a family . . . It was almost magical.
And Godi had never really thought of her chest mouth as anything other than a special gift of music for most of her foal-hood. Until one day, just as she was reaching her full growth, they visited a herd they traded with some but didn't encounter often.
She had wandered slightly away from the others with a smile, hoping to make some friends. But what happened was far from friendly. Horrible names, taunting cruelty, and even a few well aimed rocks chased her back to the safety of her herd. Godi was mortified.
It was really her first time on her own among strangers and the very stark and brutal example was terrifying. She now refused to leave the safety of the main herd body any time they were around strangers.
Her brothers didn't understand, they had no fear of strangers. But they also had wings, meaning they could easily escape if they needed to. Not to mention that they were big strong stallions that weren't likely to be menaced.
Godi's mother was more understanding, having faced the same treatment from strangers. But even her comforting and encouraging words didn't make much difference to Godi. Trying again wasn't something she was ready to do.
So on this brisk autumn day Godi finally had the courage to wander along in a forest where she didn't think she'd meet anyone who might try to hurt her. She wandered for some time, alternately enjoying the silence or singing softly with herself.
Bodhi Zohar isn't quite completely blind. But he's close. He doesn't see much more than light and dark, a shadowy world that lets him mostly navigate but had no clear resolution unless he's able to examine something so close he's actually breathing on it.
So though he's managing to make his way, on this sunny day, through the forest, he's not noticing much along the way. Of course, he's a big, sturdy stallion with menacing looking claws so nothing much ever bothered him.
But the snatches of low singing drew Bodhi closer to whatever strangers wandered in the woods. He was finding it difficult to locate as the music came and went as well as seemed to be moving on it's own. So the next time he heard the voices, he chimed his bell in a soft counterpoint to the melody.
Suddenly the voices stopped. The whole forest was silent. As if full of fearful waiting.
Well, that wasn't ideal.
"Hello? I am sorry, I did not intend to startle you. I simply wished to meet those who could sing with such beauty. I am Bodhi Zohar. Might I know how you would be called?"
He asked the shadows of forest around him, facing more or less in the direction from which he had most recently heard the singing. But still there was no sound. "Hello?" He called again.
He hadn't heard them move away, and with leaves rustling under hoof, paw, or claw, he was sure he would have. Even the sound of wings would have been enough to inform him of their departure. But there had been nothing.
"Are you the Spirits?" He wondered aloud, having heard stories of the mischief they were occasionally known for.
There was someone else out here, Godi had stilled, terrified of the voice and who might be behind it. Would he and whatever unknown companions he might have attack her if they saw her? She couldn't even get her legs to move, so frozen by sudden terror was she.
Her breathing harsh in her own ears as she trembled slightly. The woods felt like the were closing in around her, darkness racing in from the edge of her vision. Another called hello and she bit her tongue to keep from whimpering. Both in both her mouths.
Godi knew she was going to die. If he didn't kill her, the fear of him finding her would. But then came the voice a third time. And this time the wondering curiosity, subtle hope, and soft question got through to her.
The spirits? She knew well of the spirits, they were the reason her family had been twisted under the blood moon. Every generation of her family was mocked by those spirits. A serpent for a tail, tentacles, haunting visions, and extra toothy mouths in the chest were the result of spirits meddling.
"No," both mouths spoke in unison, as was her habit. But Godi winced for having done so. A stranger. Even if he couldn't see her, he would now know she wasn't normal.
Bodhi was startled at the response after so much time had passed. Such a simple syllable, but still beautiful in the dual tone. Were they twins, perhaps, speaking together as he had heard they sometimes do. Not that it mattered. He breathed a sigh, "Oh. That is well. I have been curios about spirits, but I have heard they can be capricious. So it is likely better not to meet them alone.
"Your music, however, was quite an enjoyable treat. I am Bodhi Zohar, but most simple call me Bodhi. Might I inquire as to the names of those whose voices so intrigued me?"
Godi pinched her chest mouth closed and struggled not to hyperventilate from her head mouth. He continued speaking to her. Though clearly believing she wasn't alone.
If she could have disappeared, she would have. But that wasn't something the spirits had cursed, or possibly blessed, her with. Though, she needed to be sure the stranger didn't think she was a spirit. Godi could only imagine the torment the spirits might rain down upon her if they thought she was imitating them.
After a pause that was long enough to show the boundless patience of the stallion Godi still had not seen, "I am called Godi Dzilavava. Or Godi." Her voice sounded a little strangled as she tried not to scream or squeal, or shout.
"There is only me here." Her chest mouth tightly closed, she did sound like a singular person, at least. Maybe he would think the forest echoed her words before.
Bodhi tilted his head. Clearly the voice was frightened. And professing to be alone, he could understand a reasonable trepidation. But the quivering voice seemed unreasonably afraid.
Not sure if Godi could see him, and thus was frightened of his imposing stature, Bodhi lowered himself onto the ground, trying to look less threatening. "I apologize if I have frightened you. Such was not my intent."
She heard him shifting and skidded sideways instinctively from fear. Which cleared the trees from between them, letting her see the imposingly statured stallion lowering himself to the ground. Which was a pretty universal sign of meaning no harm. It was something her herd taught, even, especially for those who had more diverse appearances.
"I . . ." Godi stopped. She couldn't tell him she wasn't afraid, she was. And that hadn't changed. That she couldn't see his eyes with his forelock and hood draping over them meant she couldn't read his expression. Now that the trees didn't hide her, would he treat her as a monster?
Bodhi heard movement, but that didn't reveal anything more than another shadow in the forest. The start of a voice and then it cut off, not having said anything.
"I will not harm you. Nor will I follow if you wish to leave. I simply was enjoying the music. Though should you like, I would be happy to have a companion and conversation for a time." He once again fell silent, deciding the mare needed his calm and patience to help allay her fears.
Godi just stares at him for a very long moment. "You . . . you do not thing me a monster?" She hadn't meant to ask that, but her chest mouth opened with her head mouth as she vocalized before her brain caught up with her words.
Cocking his head to the side for a moment at the question, "No. Should I?"
Godi blinks, "I . . . no, I am not a monster. But many think I am." Her hesitant voices answer.
"Others often think such of me as well. Though I believe it is my size and claws that cause such misapprehensions. It is not, however, something which I worry about. People show who and what they are with their words and actions. Those who judge based on appearance clearly show their own heart to be cold and dark."
A slight rolling of his shoulders in a shrug, careful not to appear as though he were about to stand or attack. "Though such is easy to say from one who can not perceive the appearance of a stranger."
What? Godi wondered. His speech was a little strange, no contractions and with bigger words than she usually heard. Though she could understand his meaning still, usually. But that last statement was confusing. "Can't perceive? I don't know what you mean."
Bodhi smiles slightly and nods, "My eyes are not blessed to see as others might. My world is mostly light and shadow, varying spots of darkness in a grey landscape. I can not discern specifics that might make another seem different or frightening."
"I can hear, though. And nothing I have heard suggests you are a monster. Rather your music is quite beautiful, though odd to my ears. To me, it sounds as if there are two of you. Is this the difference you fear might disconcert me?"
Godi listens in wonder. He couldn't see her. She hadn't even thought of that as a possibility. Though his words took concentration to translate, he clearly had registered that there was something different about her and it didn't seem to bother him.
"I . . . yes. I look rather different. Scary. I have two mouths. It . . . it lets me sing harmonies. But . . . " Godi swallows, trying to keep from letting herself spiral back into that dark and consuming fear. "I don't eat people with it or anything. I'm just . . . me."
"Well of course you are." Bodhi answers quickly. "You can't be anyone other than you. Still, I am sorry others have looked upon you with fear rather than marveling at the gift you have. Indeed, your music is heavenly. You should not let others' fear infect your own heart. Nor should you hide your gift because of their fear."
"Fear is simply there to remind us to take time and caution to be sure we are not hurt. Yet sometimes fear is too strong. And we instead use it to damage ourselves or others. We must not allow fear to remove reason."
Godi blinks, "I . . . guess? But . , , how do you know when their fear won't turn into damage? How can you . . . " She shakes her head, not sure what to ask. But his silence as he waits for the rest of her question makes it clear he didn't see her head shake.
"I don't know what to ask. I just . . . I don't want to be hurt again."
"No one can promise you that. Life is about learning and growing. And you can do neither without something to learn from or grow over. The strongest trees are the ones that have survived the hardest storms. You can choose to let the bad things be stones of stumbling in your path. Or they can be steps to rise above."
"Neither choice will change others. But it will change you. Change how you interact with the world around you and what you allow that interaction to grow inside you."
"I was not blessed with the sight of the world. But I was given understanding of the heart. A heart full of fear has no room for love. And a heart full of love forgets what it is to fear."
"So choose. Fill your heart with love and you will see that what others do from hate and fear is only their own hearts poisoning itself. And then, maybe, you can choose to love them anyway. Teach them by replacing a little of that fear with love."
"Your voices are beautiful. I think with them you could reach even a heart hardened by fear. Then you can ask them, as I ask you. What is there to fear?"
"No one has yet to give me a good answer to that question. Pain and death are merely passing things. I fear more a life unlived because of fear than the momentary discomfort of meeting one who could not see past the lies their eyes tell."
Godi listened. Bodhi's words reaching deep within the darkness of her memories and changing what she saw. It still hurt, the way she had been treated. She still did not want to experience it again. But he was right. Since then, she hadn't had joy in her heart. She hadn't made new friends and was even uncomfortable with those she'd known all her life who looked more 'normal' and might decide she was as scary as the others thought.
Which made no sense!
She really hadn't been living her life. She'd been letting fear dictate it. And that needed to end.
The sudden rush of her heart let her know this wouldn't be an easy change. But it was one she knew she needed to start making. "I . . . thank you. You've given me a lot to think about. I . . ."
She shook herself. Realizing she'd been about to leave a blind stallion alone in the forest. "Oh! Ah . . . my herd is not far. Would you like me to guide you to them? I . . . I don't know if you're lost."
Another smile as he slowly gets to his clawed feet. "That would be lovely. Your thoughtfulness is appreciated. Though, I fear you may have to correct me a few times if I stray from your path. My vision can not always lead me as well as I might like."
Godi finally had a genuine smile to answer with, "Your vision sees better than my eyes do, I think. But I'd be happy to go slowly." She moves closer, eventually brushing her shoulder lightly against his. "If it would help, I can walk close so you can feel where I am."
"That would be much appreciated, Godi. Lead the way."
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