Could you please critique?

[Lysine]

Red winged blackbirds
Floating on the wings
Of a ghost, of a lemur
Riding on the light of a silver spirit
Light in the heart and floating in the wings
Reading the storys in the clouds.
________________
Like it?
It took me about 2-3-7 minutes to write.
. mrgreen .  

[Lysine]

Greedy?
Really!
End
Eris,
Die.
____________
I wrote that in one minute.
.
mrgreen .  

[Lysine]

Winter
In
Night,
Good
Silver.  

[Lysine]

We
End
Death,
Death
In
Numbers
Gone.  

[Lysine]

With
Hollered
Yearnings.
?